The issue:

‘Drilling in the ANWR’

What the liberal whiners say:

‘Drilling in the ANWR will hurt the environment’

‘Drilling in ANWR won’t reduce the price at the pump ONE penny for at LEAST 10 years’

‘Drilling in the Anwr won’t make an impact on our foreign dependence’

‘Drilling in the Anwr will only help Exxon make more money’

‘And, what about the mating habits of the Caribou?’

Your winning, logical, reasoned arguments:


– Yes, Al Gore paints a picture of the ANWR drilling site that is stunningly beautiful. How dare we even THINK of damaging ANWR’S majestic mountain peaks and the unsurpassed splendor of its gorgeous valleys, with pools of spring water bubbling down the mountain side. Unfortunately, while this may accurately describe the incomparable beauty of Yosemite National Park, it has NO relation to the site for proposed drilling site in ANWR.

Just a tiny fraction, 1.5 million of the 19.5 million acres are to be used at all, and only 2,000 acres are to be used for the permanent infrastructure… the pipelines, oil wells, etc. There is virtually no chance that the environment will be harmed.

Here’s a photo of the proposed drilling site:

Magnificent, isn’t it?

– Ah, the "no-relief-for-10-years", argument. Since President Bush removed the Executive ban on off-shore drilling on the outer continental shelf a little over a week ago, the price of oil has dropped $25 per barrel!!!!! Just TALKING about domestic drilling drove down the price. The price at the pump has also decreased already. There are other factors, like a slightly strengthening dollar and the fact that suppliers are now worried about decreasing demand. However, the President’s announcement got the ball rolling in the right direction, and probably, at least in part, caused some of the other factors to occur.

Imagine if Congress picked up the ball now, and did their job. And dare we even consider a day when we have an actual energy policy that includes domestic drilling in ANWR, or the newly discovered Bakken reserve in Montana, and South Dakota, building nuclear power, give tax breaks to companies who develop alternative forms of energy, etc? Not to mention the oil shale reserves in Utah, Colorado and Wyoming. Utah congressman, Chris Cannon, said that the estimate is that we have 4 TRILLION barrels of oil available there…more than in the entire Middle East. So much for not having an impact on our foreign dependence. ANWR alone, is expected to yield 876,000 barrels of oil, per day.

– Drilling in ANWR WILL make Exxon-Mobile or whatever oil company drills there, more money. AND? Your point? Is it now considered evil to make money in America? If they’re willing to take the risk, survey the land, find the oil, put up the rigs, extract the oil from the ground, put it in the pipeline, deliver it to the refinery, and finally have it shipped to the gas pump, why shouldn’t they make a profit? It’s not a cheap process, and there’s no guarantee of a huge payout in the end. As an example, there’s an oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico, called Thunderhorse, operated by BP (British Petroleum), that before it pumped out even ONE OUNCE of crude oil, it cost BP, $7 BILLION. That’s quite an investment. Thunderhorse is currently pumping around 43,000 barrels per day now, and eventually, they believe it will produce 250,000, but it won’t be up to full capacity for more than 3 years. It’s nowhere near profitable yet.

Big oil is getting hammered right now by Congress over their profits. But guess who profits more from the oil industry than even the oil industry? Yes, your government. According to the Tax Foundation, from 1977-2004, big oil made $643 billion in profits. Nice. During that same span, Federal and State governments made $1.343 TRILLION in tax revenues from big oil. Nicer. I think your liberal friends might be mad at the wrong people here.

– As for the mating habits of the caribou, thrown off of their amorous ways by unsightly oil rigs, I recommend…Caribou Viagra. Or Cialis. Or which one is it, that has the couple sitting outside in separate twin bathtubs, holding fingers across the porecelain as they gaze out over a majestically beautiful landscape…ANWR, perhaps? What the heck, have Exxon spring for Cialis, AND a couple Caribou tubs. Plus, maybe they should throw in a few speakers on the rigs to pipe in some Michael Buble. If that doesn’t do it, the stinking Caribou don’t deserve to procreate.