Chinese media blackout on faked Olympic ceremony saga

GLENN: I’m just glad that I haven’t had to see any bucktooth kids during the Olympics. You know what I mean? If I would see because when I see Chinese people, I think, that’s the perfect flawless image right there. That’s what that is. And, you know, I wouldn’t know what to think of a country that all of a sudden, I mean, all their people start looking like every Englishman ever born. You know, what would you think? What would you think? You’re 9 and your teeth aren’t perfect? What kind of freakish country is that? Oh, man.

You know, when I saw the little 9 year old girl singing the National Anthem, I thought, wow, that’s really neat. And they did this contest. "Hey, hey, let’s have the perfect little Chinese girl sing the National Anthem and everybody will go crazy and it will be great." So they found them. It’s great. Only the problem is the girl that won didn’t sing the song because the general music director of the ceremony, he came out and said the state broadcaster confirmed that the actual singer was 7 year old Yang Peiyi. They lip synched but with an entirely different kid. Yang was a little chubby. You ain’t having fat chicks on TV, are you, China? Whoa. Good thing you’re teaching your kids right out of the chute: Hey, fat kid, sit down. And she also had well, she also had uneven teeth. She was, quote, not attractive enough. Oh, well, hang on. Hitler, can we borrow your oven for a second? Can we get this fat kid in?

The reason why, quoting, the reason why little Yang was not chosen was because we wanted to project the right image. We were thinking of what’s best for the nation. Oh. Oh, well, why didn’t you say that in the first place. The right image? Sure. And I’m sure little Yang who’s fat with crooked teeth is not crying herself to sleep every night and thinking about, is it just the Japanese that can commit Harry Carey? I’m sure she’s not doing that every night thinking that the country has said she’s not the right image and wasn’t the best for the nation. I’m sure that’s not going to cause any self esteem problems. Anybody have daughters? If you have daughters and you’re a guy, how many times have you said something like, "I don’t know, that shirt really doesn’t look good." Or, you know, "Hey, pull your shirt down" or "Pull your pants up" or whatever to your daughter and your wife will look at you like, "What are you saying!" Then you go into the other room: "Do you know that’s going to leave a mark on her forever?" "No, I don’t… what?" Oh, I’m sure, I’m sure the state coming out and saying, whoa, porky, have a seat, that’s not going to bother her. And by the way, the reason was national interest. Quote: The child on camera should be flawless in image. Internal feelings and expression flawless. Oh. By the way, that was Chen that said that. He’s the world renowned composer and French citizen.

Well, isn’t it great? We should just breed more French Chinese. We should just like, you know, breed them like we do puppy dogs. Just, we need the best of the French and the best of the Chinese and put them together and this is what we get. It’s beautiful when you that’s like, if you could just get the Germans and the Italians together, it’s always magic. That’s terrible, that’s just great. That always ends well.

Chen, the French Chinaman, said that the final decision to stage the event with lip sinking to another girl’s voice was taken after a senior member of the Chinese ruling communist party Politburo attended a rehearsal. He quote said, "There’s a problem and you need to fix it." So we did. Heil Hitler, baby. That doesn’t sound creepy at all. Does that creep anybody else out? I like that. I’m glad we’re over participating in the NBC Olympics. I hope NBC can give us more propaganda. This is fantastic. What would he have done if the order was take the kid out to a rice paddy and drown them? That is crazy, wonderful rice, I can put that underneath nice chicken… I’m sure that they would have drawn the line at drowning them in a rice paddy. By the way, it’s been learned that other parts of the show have been fake as well. The fireworks that depicted the footprints moving from central Beijing’s Tienenmann Square, partly computer generated, prerecorded for TV. But here’s the best part. Bob Costas said that. What you are looking at is film magic, these aren’t he said that. I got it. All you have to do is listen to it. But what they didn’t say is why. Why? Grucci has spent like a year over isn’t it weird the people who invented fireworks needed an American firework company to come over and do the fireworks. Anyway, the reason they decided to do that is because of the mist problem. They knew that the mist, otherwise known as smog by the way, they are just waiting for us to get on to the green bandwagon and then they’re there. Anyway, Grucci said nobody will be able to see it from the mist. So that’s why it was computer generated. Because the smog was so bad! Meanwhile they’re down on the field lecturing us about how everybody needs to protect the environment. Seriously, China, I just wish we could be more like you, I do. Making the chubby fatty fat fatso 9 year old, 9 year old sing off camera because she’s not attractive enough. And boy, when you say the truth, it’s the truth. Faking huge parts of the ceremony in order to pump up your image? Where do I sign up for this? This is imagine if the United States did that? Imagine. People would be in an uproar. That’s crazy. How could you do that, you do that to a little child? You don’t treat anybody like that, let alone a little child. Why isn’t the rest of the world outraged by this? It’s China. It’s a step up. Hey, usually you’d drown the fat kid in the rice paddy. "Oh, that is true." "Oh, yes, I’ve seen it myself."

The interview that Chang gave, by the way, the Chinese Frenchman was on the Internet for a very short time and then it suddenly disappeared off of the Internet. I don’t know how that happened. That is really, really, really super weird. I wish we had that wonderful Fairness Doctrine like they have in China. I can only hope for change.