GLENN BECK PROGRAM
GLENN: Here’s what you just need to know from today’s news, from the Associated Press. Midwest corn boom threatens sea life. This is quite possibly my favorite story maybe of the month. Jefferson, Iowa: Because of rising demand for ethanol — now remember, ethanol’s good. It’s good for the environment. It’s a renewable source. We could put ethanol up. It’s good. "Because of the rising demand for ethanol, American farmers are growing more corn than anytime since World War II, and the sea life in the Gulf of Mexico is paying the price. The nation’s corn crop is fertilized with millions of pounds of nitrogen-based fertilizer." Nitrogen-based fertilizer, isn’t nitrogen-based fertilizer crap? Just, I’m just saying. "When that nitrogen runs off the fields in corn belt states, it makes its way to the Mississippi River and eventually pours into the Gulf where it contributes to a growing dead zone, a 7900 square mile patch so depleted of oxygen that fish, crabs and shrimp suffocate. The dead zone was discovered in 1985 and has grown fairly steadily since then, forcing fishermen to venture further and further out to the sea to find their catch. For decades fertilizer has been considered the prime cause of the lifeless spot. With demand of corn booming, some researchers feel the dead zone will expand rapidly with the devastating consequence. We may be coming close to a tipping point," says Matt Rota, a director of resource program for the New Orleans-based Gulf Restoration Network, an environmental group. The Gulf ecosystem might change or collapse as opposed to just being impacted. Environmentalists had hoped to cut nitrogen runoff by encouraging farmers to apply less fertilizer and establish buffers along the waterways but demand for corn-based fuel additive ethanol has driven up the price for the crop which is selling at about $4 a bushel, up from a little more than $2 in 2002. That enticed American farmers, mostly in Iowa, Illinois, Minnesota, North Dakota, and South Dakota to plant more than 93 million acres of corn in 2007, the most since 1944. They substituted corn for other crops and made use of land not previously used in cultivation.
Got it? So our solution has now caused another problem. This is exactly why I say the solution to global warming is to do nothing. Don’t do anything. Government, get out of the way. Let the public — first of all, ethanol is not the answer. Ethanol takes 80% of the energy, 80% of a gallon of gas to produce a gallon of gas. How stupid is that? What are we thinking? We’ll be the only society in history to burn up our food supply. Just so stupid.
Here’s another thing. I love this. The arrogance of scientists. It has been 50 years since the first scientists first created DNA in a test tube, stitching ordinary chemical ingredients together to make life’s most extraordinary molecule. Until recently, however, even the most sophisticated laboratories could only make a small snippet of DNA. An extra gene or two to be inserted into corn plants, for example, to help the plants ward off insects or tolerate drought. Now researchers are poised to cross a dramatic barrier, the creation of life, driven by a completely artificial DNA. This is according to the Washington Post. Scientists in Maryland have already built the world’s first entirely handcrafted chromosome, a large looping strand of DNA made from scratch in a laboratory, containing all the instructions a microbe needs to live and reproduce. In the coming year they hope to transplant it into a cell where it’s expected to boot up to life itself. Like software downloaded from the Internet. Well, let me go with that software downloaded from the Internet. I’m sure there’s never anything destructive in any kind of flawed software that you just download from the Internet and put into a cell or a system and boot it up. What are we thinking? I would personally like to buy every scientist a ticket to go ahead and see "I Am Legend." May I? I saw the beginning of that thing and then I slept for part of it and then I saw the end of it. Let me tell you something. The scariest part about I Am Legend is that’s exactly how it will happen. The scientists that are like, oh, gee. I mean, life, there was no intelligent design there. I mean, "look at us. We’re designing life and there’s no intelligence in here (laughing.)".
I mean, so they go and design life. In "I Am Legend," what they do is they cure cancer. Design something that will cure cancer. No, that’s at the very beginning. It’s in the first two minutes. Not even — it’s before the title. "We’ve cured cancer." Look at us. Whoa." So what you are saying is, yes, we finally found a cure for cancer. They created life that will eat cancer. Unfortunately in the movie it turns you into a vampire. Now, I’m pretty sure we’ll create vampires because you’d have to be a moron to stitch in the fang chromosome, you know, right into the DNA strand, but is there any doubt that that’s the way we’re all going to — you know, if you know anything about the so-called end times, whether the end times happen or not, I don’t know. But if you read about them, what is one of the big things? Plagues. Plagues.
Look what we’ve got going on. We’ve got all kinds of nasty stuff just boiling under the surface already that we can’t control and we want to create new life? Am I the only one who thinks — is there a scientist within the sound of my voice that says, yeah, thinking about that now, that’s probably not a good idea. I mean, we always think that they — oh, this one is going to be good. This one’s good. Okay, sure, we’ve made horrible mistakes, but creating life, mistake there.
See, if you just think that life just happened, well, then I guess, you know, you have more intelligence than the universe did. "That just happened. I’m designing it. So it’s got to be better." The arrogance of science.
(Lobster Gram commercial.)
GLENN: So we’ll go to the phones here in a second. Stu, are you watching the Pat Robertson thing?
STU: Yeah, because the words, you know, get scrolled up on the screen here in the studio. We have it set like that. So I’m reading your comments and I just saw you write, unlike Keith Olbermann, Media Matters doesn’t write what I say on air.
GLENN: I was on with Pat Robertson this morning. I haven’t seen it yet. Does it look all right?
STU: Actually you look hot. I think this is one of your — this is a good look for you. I like the —
STU: I mean, is that not what you were asking?
GLENN: No, I —
STU: Well, I mean, I can’t deny it. I mean, you look like —
GLENN: Sarah, go on in.
STU: Sarah, come on. Look at this. I think he looks good today. He looks rested, you know?
GLENN: I got three hours sleep last night, huh?
SARAH: I think you look good all the time.
GLENN: Yeah, see?
STU: It is Christmas bonus week.
GLENN: It is. It’s Christmas bonus day.
STU: It is Christmas bonus day.
GLENN: Which explains you now, suspicious.
STU: No way.
GLENN: All of a sudden, you look hot, Glenn.
STU: I don’t know what you’re talking about. I think you look good.
GLENN: It was weird about —
STU: Your abs look tight, you know.
GLENN: Okay, stop.
STU: Obviously you’ve been lifting a little.
GLENN: Dan, you would never do that, would you, on Christmas bonus day?
DAN: No way. That is a nice tie you picked today, by the way.
GLENN: Thank you.
DAN: I’m just being honest.
GLENN: My publicist was with me and for some reason I don’t — I think this is the first time I’ve ever met him.
GLENN: Yeah. I didn’t even — I pay the guy like I don’t even know how much and once in a while I’ll just call in. Do you still work for me? He’s like, yep. He called last night. He said, I’d like to go into the Pat Robertson thing and I said, okay. So I meet him there and afterwards he said, I was a little uncomfortable with, you know, you saying that, you know, you pray.
STU: You pray for America every day.
GLENN: "You pray for America." And he was like, I don’t — I said, it’s the 700 Club. If I can’t say I pray on the 700 Club, where can you possibly say it? "I don’t know. You should keep that to yourself." All right. I’m going to disregard that advice. He’s better off, he’s got a longer career with me if he doesn’t show up. Just don’t show up and you have a better chance of staying on the payroll. "Yeah, you should — the prayer thing, I don’t know. A lot of people think that God thing is weird."
STU: It’s a trend, you know? Obviously it comes and goes.