You would think that after a week on the beach that Glenn would come back energetic and refreshed. But, of course, he had to have something negative to say about his Spring Break. On radio this morning, Glenn explained how he used his five-year-old daughter to cheat on his crazy hippie stick diet (and still got no satisfaction).
“I got home and I actually had a lousy last couple of days and I think a lot of it is because I'm on this new stupid diet,” Glenn complained on radio this morning. “I juiced for four days. Four days. I don't even get the pulp. I don't even get the good stuff.”
“And I had kale and dill one day. It was great,” he lamented.
“You had both kale and dill in the same day?” Stu joked.
“With spinach. In the same drink, You've never lived until you've had that in a big frothy glass,” Glenn explained.
Surely Glenn got to splurge at some point, right? That’s what you do on vacation! You eat ice cream and pizza and steak and all that other good stuff you don’t the rest of the time (or is that just me?). Well, Glenn sure didn’t get to splurge.
“You know what my splurge was?” he asked. “ I said to my daughter - I'm using my 5-year-old daughter now. That's what it's turned into, my 5-year-old. I said, ‘See those peanuts? Come on, what do you say? Why don't you go get that? Why don't you get those peanuts? Just get a handful of those peanuts, bring them over to Dad. Come on’,” Glenn joked.
“So she went over, and I'm corrupting my daughter. So she comes over and she sneaks and I'm like, shhh, don't let anybody know. She brings the peanuts over to me and so we -- you know, she's got a handful of peanuts and I'm like, yeah. And she starts to eat one and I'm like, these are mine. Eat your own damn peanuts,” He joked.
“So that was my splurge, and they were unsalted and unroasted. So they're even yummier,” Glenn said sarcastically.
“I spent, believe it or not, what, ten days? Minimum having 900 calories a day and maximum 1493 calories. And I lost 1.8 pounds and I don't feel any better!”