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GLENN: We've been talking about, you know, this nationalization of things that are too big to fail and, what was it, about a week ago or two weeks ago I mentioned, I saw some I saw some story in some newspaper that Coldstone Creamery was closing a couple of stores and I said, they are too yummy to fail. And I used Coldstone Creamery as, if you're going to bail somebody out, these are the people I want you to bail out! Let's socialize Coldstone Creamery, free ice cream for everybody. I'll give you my copay of a buck: I'm sorry, I need a gallon of that, please. That's who we bail out. Freddie and Fannie who? What? I don't think so. Go save the ice cream people.
Well, I did this whole thing on it and almost immediately we got an e mail from the big wigs at Coldstone Creamery appreciating our support but reminding me that they don't need a bailout and I just wrote back, if you ever do, you are going to need a fat friend like me.
So Dan Beem, what are you? Are you the are you the ice cream president?
BEEM: I am the president of Coldstone Creamery, Glenn.
GLENN: Where do you live?
BEEM: We're out of Scottsdale, Arizona.
GLENN: Perfect place to have ice cream.
BEEM: Nice and hot, good for eaters.
GLENN: So Dan, you are not closing down?
BEEM: We are not closing down.
GLENN: Because this will be I'm telling you I will rally the troops, and I mean literal troops. If we have to use the National Guard to keep those doors open, we will.
BEEM: Well, we definitely appreciate your support, that's for sure.
GLENN: I just want you to know that. So I just got a, just like a I don't even know, freezerful of ice cream here and you have asked if we wanted to make our own flavor.
BEEM: We did.
GLENN: Yeah. Now, is this just some is this just some thing just so I will eat ice cream and then and just be happy? Because I am. Or is this really something that you're saying, no, really, we'll have you make a flavor and then people can come in and ask for it?
BEEM: I think it's actually we're going to have you make a flavor and people can come in and ask for it.
GLENN: That's fantastic. That's fantastic. Okay. Stu, you tried the flavor. What do you think?
STU: The flavor's excellent.
STU: This is a good decision by you.
GLENN: Now, Dan, how do you work out the flavors, like the percentages of stuff?
BEEM: Well, we're fortunate that we have a full time taste master here
GLENN: Wait, wait, how do I apply? How do you apply? No, seriously if I ever want to change jobs like this afternoon, how do I apply?
BEEM: Give me a call. We'll see if we can get you in.
GLENN: Oh, I'd be your best taste tester, I would. I would. Do you have to work out for that or anything?
BEEM: No. I think you just have to have a pretty good chemistry degree to figure it all out.
BEEM: Just a good chemistry degree.
GLENN: Let's say that I had one from the University of Antigua.
BEEM: As long as you provide me a certificate, we're good to go.
GLENN: Do you check into the authenticity of the certificate?
BEEM: Absolutely not.
GLENN: I will talk to you this afternoon.
So here's what it is. Cake batter and then Graham cracker crust, you know, Graham crackers.
GLENN: And then just a whole buttload of blueberries. I don't know if that's that's the way we used to talk about it in chemistry class in the University of Antigua.
BEEM: I like it.
GLENN: Then marshmallows. You mix it all together but the balance has to be right. Because it's got to have that real blueberry flavor in the cake batter. You know what I mean?
BEEM: I do.
GLENN: And it has to have the really good it's very heavy on the ingredients.
BEEM: We like that indulgence.
GLENN: You see what I mean?
GLENN: Oh, that's a good word, indulgence.
STU: Glenn, are you going to accept my gang of one compromise on your flavor?
STU: In which like, you know when you have macaroni and cheese and they sprinkle the breadcrumbs on top? I support sprinkling some dry Graham cracker crust on top as well.
GLENN: I'll give you that. That's good.
STU: Thank you.
GLENN: What do you think?
BEEM: I tell you you know you pick the cake batter ice cream as the flavor, did you know that was invented by a franchisee?
GLENN: Was it really?
BEEM: It was. We get some of our best ideas from franchisees.
GLENN: Is it like, well, we just called up Dow and said, can you make Clorox taste like cake? I don't want to know if it's like something you just add in that's all chemicals.
BEEM: No, they are just incredibly creative, they kind of experiment at the store level and they pass their best ideas on to us here. We have our taste master look at it and if we think it's a good idea, we put it into play.
GLENN: What's the most popular combo?
BEEM: As far as a creation?
BEEM: I think it's probably that Oreo Overload, Oreo, some fudge and some chocolate chips.
GLENN: When you're in, like, a meeting, okay?
GLENN: Do you have these ice cream meetings?
BEEM: Every meeting, Glenn. In fact, we start off usually with some research and development meetings in the morning at 7:30, we start off our day by eating ice cream.
GLENN: What time are you available to talk today about that opening? Seriously.
BEEM: Anytime you'd like.
GLENN: 1:00 ish? Anytime you'd like.
GLENN: This is the best job ever. You realize that, right? Oh, don't tell me that you get sick of it. Are you sick of ice cream?
BEEM: No, Glenn. I do have the best job in the world. I mean, I work with talented people. But a funny story is I used to work with NASCAR on the East Coast and we got the job offer to come out here and I told my son that I was going to come to work for Coldstone Creamery. Well, he went and told all of his teachers and his friends that we were moving to Arizona because I was going to drive an ice cream truck. So although it's not the ice cream truck job, pretty fantastic.
GLENN: Yeah, tell your son you can't eat NASCARs.
GLENN: Just saying. So have you ever sat in the meeting, you know, with all the ice cream experts like me and somebody says, "Okay, guys, I had an idea last night, your mouth ever just water? Do you guys have spittoons or anything just so you can get the spit out of your because your mouth is watering so much? Because you were describing the thing, the best seller? My mouth started to water. I'm just saying. These are the questions that I ask that everybody else is afraid of or... no, don't do a lot of interviews on this program which is strange. But anyway, go ahead, Dan.
BEEM: No, that's a great point. I think that's how we got something if we know's going to be a home run. If we look around the table and our mouths are watering, we immediately start to do the research on it.
GLENN: Yes. Have you ever heard an idea and then you tried it and you went, you know, on second thought somebody at the table we all looked at each other and somebody should have just said, "I don't think that one's going to work."
BEEM: We had a promotion a couple of years ago called Red Pan where we put a different flavor ice cream into our dipping cabinet every month and we got pretty creative back there, everything from Red Hot to Wasabi Ginger. The Wasabi Ginger is one that probably shouldn't have Mead it through the table.
GLENN: Have you ever thought of bean ice cream, like baked bean, baked bean ice cream?
BEEM: I haven't, but I'll write it down for everybody to try out.
GLENN: I wouldn't. I'd give that one to friendlies. Do you ever is there an Slugworth kind of character in the ice cream, you know, kind of that espionage, kind of Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory, that's Slugworth trying to get your everlasting Gobstopper recipe? Does that go on in the ice cream world?
BEEM: I'm sure there's a setup but our security's pretty good.
GLENN: Really? What is ice cream security really like? Dan, that's another, "I'm here to protect the ice cream! I'm going down with the ice cream!" Dan, so we give you this recipe and how do you you'll just come up with the right mixture of it and then when would it be available?
BEEM: Well, what I think we probably need to do is we'll take this, let our taste master play with it, get the proportions correct. We'll actually send it back to you to make sure that it's good and if you like the proportion, then I think we just put it on your website, people can print it out and bring it in to the stores.
GLENN: I may, I may not like the first draft. I'm just saying.
BEEM: Well, we like to get it right. So we'll go through as many drafts as you need.
GLENN: I'm a stickler on perfection, Dan. I just might have to try a few. Okay, Dan, thanks a lot, man, appreciate it.
BEEM: Thanks, Glenn.
GLENN: All right. Bye bye.