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GLENN: We have now Tipper on the phone from Nashville because there is a did you know, Tipper, about what happened in Oregon, apparently there was an investigation that Al , what happened? You were touching
PAT: I was it just got the global warming just became overwhelming.
GLENN: And there is
PAT: As I was receiving the massage.
GLENN: And the masseuse said in 2006 that he was touching her
PAT: Buttox and her breastages. That's right. Her buttox and her breastages.
GLENN: All right. And did you know about this, Tipper?
STU: I did hear about it, but I didn't
GLENN: Wait a minute.
PAT: This doesn't sound like Tipper. Is this really Tipper Gore?
GLENN: I don't think that sounds like Tipper Gore
STU: I don't understand. Of course it is. Of course it is.
GLENN: I don't remember her being quite so valley girlish.
STU: Well, I'm on the phone. You may have heard a lot of my
GLENN: Al, is this Tipper?
STU: Al, I love you.
PAT: I love you, too, honey. And do you remember the time I read you poetry, when I said I was a child and she was a child in this kingdom by the sea, but we loved with a love that was more than love? I am my Annabel Lee.
STU: Oh, that definitely brings back memories.
GLENN: Really? Like, what kind of romantic memories did you have with
STU: Well, Al, we've had our tough times but, lining, he is he really had quite a game back in the day.
GLENN: He had a game?
STU: Oh, yeah. He had a lot of heat. His skills were tight and
PAT: My skills were tight.
GLENN: Your skills are tight.
PAT: Of course this is Tipper. Of course it is
STU: I remember back when we would go out and he would just talk to me for hours and gaze deep in my eyes and tell me about the dangers of multi passenger vehicles.
GLENN: And that worked for you?
STU: It really did.
GLENN: Could you try that on for I just want to see, just for the ladies in the audience now, Al, could you just
PAT: Tell them about the dangers of our SUVs. Tipper, it is our SUVs that are warming this planet to a catastrophic level.
STU: Should we reconsider?
PAT: I think it might be time.
STU: The divorce hasn't gone through yet. I just as you remember, of course, ours was the story that inspired Love Story.
GLENN: Do you know what? That is not true.
STU: Or was it Love Canal? It was something like that.
PAT: It was Love Story which was all true except for Tipper dying of cancer.
GLENN: Isn't that kind of the
PAT: Small detail, THE fact that she had cancer and died at the end.
GLENN: I think that was the main point of that story.
STU: Fortunately our ending is not it's not positive. We're not happy about it. Obviously
GLENN: Wait. You survived cancer.
STU: Well, I did.
GLENN: You didn't even have it?
STU: How else? Of course you're going to survive it if you didn't have it. That's one of the positive stories of not having it. That's why you try to avoid it. You can’t survive it when you don't have it.
GLENN: Okay. Good.
STU: But I should tell you that I have written
GLENN: Oh, boy. It sounds tender.
PAT: I'm getting choked up. Is it the CO2 in the room that's doing that, Tipper?
STU: Well, I was just having a moment. See, this is the problem. I mean, it's just all this talk about global warming and I just
GLENN: You were having a moment.
STU: A nice romantic moment and you brought up carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.
Glenn: Go ahead. Here comes the love poem from Tipper Gore to
STU: It's a Haiku.
GLENN: It's a Haiku?
GLENN: It's not a poem?
STU: No. Why would I
GLENN: Is it 5, 7, 5?
STU: It is 5, 7, 5.
GLENN: All right. Go ahead.
PAT: Does it sometimes sound like I'm married to Ms. Piggy? Just a little bit?
GLENN: All right. Go ahead.
STU: My Haiku, by Tipper. Get your hands off me. Why do you touch my buttox? Mother Earth cries rape.
GLENN: Thank you very much, Tipper. It's good to talk to you.
[NOTE: Transcript may have been edited to enhance readability - audio archive includes full segment as it was originally aired]