Glenn Beck: Cap and Trade


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GLENN: From Midtown Manhattan in Rockefeller Plaza high above the ice rink and within spitting distance of Keith Olbermann. Hello and welcome to the program. I'm -- no, I've tried. I'm almost there. I am. But welcome to the program. My name is Glenn Beck. I'm glad that you're here. We have to wish somebody a happy birthday today. Stu's wife Lisa, who is the voice that you hear, the -- what does it say?

STU: Fusion of entertainment and enlightenment. You've only heard it three times a day for the last eight years.

GLENN: So she's the voice of the program. And she works for a very trendy -- she's very trendy. She works for a very trendy, cool, fashionable radio station and, you know, basically she is the kind of person that Stu really has no right to hang around.

STU: Thank you for that. I would agree.

GLENN: No, I'm just saying. And apparently she's fighting -- she's being shoved through the exit door out of her 20s and right into another, more of a plus sized door, 30s.

STU: This is a big transition, yes.

GLENN: Yeah. She's not happy about it, is she?

STU: I would say she's taking it a little hard. Which is unnecessary for her.

GLENN: 40 kind of hit me. 40 hit me, but 40 hit me hard because none of my friends called, wrote, nothing. My wife threw a surprise party for me, but because of my schedule, and I don't remember what it was, she threw it for, like, three weeks after. Do you remember that, Stu?

STU: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

GLENN: It was like three weeks after my party and, like, all my friends were just like, hey, whatever. And I was really, I didn't expect it and didn't expect a big party or anything like that. But then Tania said -- because Tania's really not a good liar and so she just, you know, blew by it because she didn't want to make a big deal and fake it. And so -- there's so many lines there. She just --

STU: How did I miss all of them?

GLENN: I know, I know. Good for you, Stu.

STU: I should be docked today's pay.

GLENN: Okay. So she didn't say anything and I'm, like, starting to think my wife, she didn't even really say anything about my 40th. I mean, it's starting to bother me; I don't think she loves me.

STU: So in her effort to make a great day for you, she almost drove you to depression.

GLENN: I almost killed myself. And we were down in Washington for something and I said to -- I said to Chris -- and it was the day of the party and I said, Chris, I said, you know what, I'm just going to call Tania. Let's just have dinner here in Washington. He's like, no! We have to -- and he started talking like, you know, William Shatner, we... have to... get to train... now. And it was just odd. But anyway, so 40 really hit me and took me by surprise. 30 for a woman, going to hit her. It's going to hit her.

STU: Why? She's never had a problem with any of the other birthdays.

GLENN: Explain cap and trade to me, Stu.

STU: Cap and trade as far as carbon emissions?

GLENN: Carbon emissions.

STU: Global warming?

GLENN: Explain cap and trade. I'm going to explain how the world works, cap and trade.

STU: All right. Well, in a global warming environment.

GLENN: Yeah.

STU: Basically you would put a cap, like a salary cap in sports.

GLENN: Yes.

STU: I know you understand that analogy. Like a cap in the total amount of carbon emissions.

GLENN: Yes.

STU: And then companies that use less than their share, quote/unquote, whatever the government decides is their share, then they can trade the excess to companies who use more than their share.

GLENN: Got it.

STU: So you cap the total amount but then you can trade.

GLENN: But it's really all about money, isn't it?

STU: Oh, yes.

GLENN: It's all about money.

STU: Definitely all about money.

GLENN: The more money you have, the more you can trade, the more things you can buy. Right?

STU: Yes. You would be able to --

GLENN: The more carbon units you can buy.

STU: Yes. You would be able to buy as many units as you needed.

GLENN: Got it. Stu, what is the basic fundamental building block of the human body?

STU: I mean, the reproductive system?

GLENN: No, no, no. What is the basic fundamental building block of all of life?

STU: The molecule?

GLENN: No, the basic fundamental -- carbon.

STU: Carbon.

GLENN: We are carbon units.

STU: Okay.

GLENN: Okay? So let me tell you about the basic fundamental building block, the cap and trade system of carbon units.

STU: I don't know where you're going with this, but it doesn't seem like it's going to turn out well.

GLENN: Stu, she's 30 now.

STU: Yes, she is. Today.

GLENN: Cap, trade.

STU: What does that mean?

GLENN: Cap, and trade. She's 30. You can cap her now. 30 is -- you cap her.

STU: Cap her as in, like, shoot her? You put a cap in her?

GLENN: Look. Stu, think of your salary.

STU: Okay.

GLENN: Think of the salary you made when you married her.

STU: Sure.

GLENN: Okay. Do you think there's a difference there?

STU: There is a difference there.

GLENN: But you're walking around with the same thing that you, you know, you had when you were making the other salary.

STU: I didn't --

GLENN: And she's depreciated.

STU: I don't know what you're saying.

GLENN: Just listen to me. Just listen to me. She's depreciated, okay? So what you do -- and it's nothing against Lisa. You know I love her.

STU: Just because you're telling me that my wife is depreciating, you're saying there's nothing against her?

GLENN: No, no, no. Because she's depreciating to you. Like for me, she's not depreciating.

STU: Okay.

GLENN: Okay? Because she's 30. But I'm 45.

STU: Uh-huh.

GLENN: So she's still, she's below my cap.

STU: Okay.

GLENN: My cap, 40. Tania, she's like, I don't know, 30 something or other.

STU: You don't know --

GLENN: I don't know.

STU: You just know her --

GLENN: I have a deal in my calendar on the, you know, desktop calendar, an alarm of when she hits 40.

STU: And then what happens then?

GLENN: Trade her. But I trade her for somebody like Lisa who is younger. Now, I wouldn't trade her -- if Tania were 40 today, I would trade her for Lisa because I know her, I like her. She's nice.

STU: Okay. This is --

GLENN: And she's hot and she's cool.

STU: All making me very uncomfortable. Go ahead.

GLENN: But I'm just -- we're talking carbon.

STU: Right. This is just --

GLENN: All we're doing is we're talking carbon.

STU: This is all mathematics you're saying?

GLENN: Yeah. We're trading carbon. You see what I'm saying? What?

STU: So I just want to make sure I understand the basics before we go on.

GLENN: You should be with somebody 22.

STU: That's a very good point. So you are saying that I have to -- I've capped my marriage --

GLENN: At 30.

STU: At 30 and now I'm going to trade for a 22-year-old.

GLENN: Yes.

STU: And you're capping your wife at 40 and you are going to trade for a 30-year-old?

GLENN: Yes. But that always changes, see? So it's -- because people will say, oh, this is horrible, how could you possibly do this?

STU: A lot of people would say it. Like almost everyone would.

GLENN: No, no. It's because they misunderstand.

STU: They misunderstand the --

GLENN: No, they don't understand carbon trading, all right? Because it's not bad, because no matter what scientists say, carbon is not bad. It is the basic building block. I'm not going to -- what are we going to do? Sequester Lisa? No, we're not going to sequester her. It's carbon. It's the basic building block of life. She's just, I don't know how many carbon units but that's what she is, she's several carbon units.

STU: Okay. So she's the -- you're giving her the -- you are calling her the basic building block of life.

GLENN: Building block of life.

STU: That should be traded like a commodity?

GLENN: No, not like a commodity.

STU: That's what cap and trade is. I mean, it's -- essentially.

GLENN: Stu, we're trying to help the planet, right?

STU: Okay.

GLENN: We're trying to help -- we're trying to help the planet, okay? So let's just do what's right for the planet.

STU: Because I don't want to be accused of hating the planet.

GLENN: No.

STU: I will say that.

GLENN: No.

STU: Because now you are making -- you are kind of shining a different light on this.

GLENN: So now listen. So you might say in this -- because right now do you feel bad for Lisa? If you would say, hey, I'm going to cap and trade you?

STU: Yes, I feel terrible.

GLENN: Absolutely. But because she's 30, she would be getting another model, not a newer model, but a wealthier model.

STU: Right, she's going to trade up.

GLENN: She's going to trade up.

STU: The income ladder.

GLENN: Like me, okay?

STU: This is -- why do you keep using yourself as an example? Can we use someone else?

GLENN: No, I just -- I can't think of anybody else.

STU: You can't think of anyone else? There's so many people in the world.

GLENN: I'm just saying. So we cap -- you've capped her at 30. Now, I wouldn't -- I wouldn't do it because she's 30. You know, Tania I'm not willing -- I love my wife. I'm not willing to trade her until she hits 40.

STU: That's really gracious of you.

GLENN: I know. So -- but the great thing is she trades up and then it just keeps going. So for instance, like I would never be with a 22-year-old because that's too young.

STU: That would be weird.

GLENN: That would be weird.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: When you're my age, when you're 40, you don't go with a 22-year-old, you don't go with 28. That's why it's a sliding scale. That's how you get a 50-year-old woman to be with, like, an 80-year-old.

STU: So the 80-year-old guy --

GLENN: The 80-year-old guy, lots of money usually and he's like, she's hot. Because he's 80; she's 50.

STU: Right.

GLENN: Of course she's hot.

STU: Right.

GLENN: You know what I mean? It would be sick if the 80 was with, like, a 30-year-old. But 50, it's the cap and trade system.

STU: Are there actual levels, like, that you have to cap? Or is this a personal cap you get to choose from?

GLENN: No, we'll have some sort of a -- you know, we would have to get a committee together.

STU: A committee? Of --

GLENN: Somebody to, you know, say -- you know, to examine all of the people and to say, hmmm.

STU: So what do I have to do next? What's my next step? Because my wife turned 30 today.

GLENN: It's easy. It's in the name. Cap, and trade.

STU: So I trade for a -- I'm looking for a 22-year-old now.

GLENN: That would be capped.

STU: Well, I guess you are telling me I need to cap.

GLENN: Do you care about the planet?

STU: No, I don't -- I mean, I care about the planet.

GLENN: Sometimes it's hard to do. Do you know how hard it's been for me to use fluorescent light bulbs?

STU: No.

GLENN: It's been very difficult.

STU: So you are saying I need to make a sacrifice here.

GLENN: You need to make a sacrifice. It's for your children.

STU: For a 22-year-old?

GLENN: Yeah. It's for your children.

STU: I don't have any children.

GLENN: You know why?

STU: No, I don't -- well, I yes, I know why. I know the process. I understand why it hasn't --

GLENN: That clock is ticking there.

STU: I don't think that's true.

GLENN: No, it is. That clock is ticking. She's close to being barren. She's --

STU: This is -- all of this is making me very uncomfortable.

GLENN: She is close to -- it is a -- science -- look, it's not me.

STU: No, no, not you, definitely not.

GLENN: This is almost a scientific consensus. This close to being barren.

STU: When you say almost, what's --

GLENN: Within 1,000 years.

STU: It will be a scientific --

GLENN: Yeah, within 1,000 years she will be barren. No, it could happen in 15 years, could happen in five years, I don't know. But definitely within 1,000 years she will be completely barren and all because you wouldn't trade carbon.

STU: So you are saying it's my earthly duty?

GLENN: It is.

STU: To be green.

GLENN: Absolutely.

STU: I have to cap and trade my wife and give them to someone like you that you can't name another person as an example?

GLENN: No. But it won't be me.

STU: Right.

GLENN: Because I love my wife.

STU: Until she's 40.

GLENN: Yeah, but then she -- I mean, come on. We haven't talked about this but she understands.

STU: Are you sure that we would understand that? Have you explained the cap and trade system to her?

GLENN: No, but I'm pretty sure she would -- you don't think -- yeah, she would understand. She knows.

STU: It's possible she might not.

GLENN: Well, anything's possible. It's not probable. I mean, women have to understand the cap and trade. I mean, look who they're with.

Stu, look who your wife is with.

STU: Right. Me.

GLENN: You.

STU: Not good.

GLENN: Right.

STU: That was not a good move.

GLENN: Look who my wife is with.

STU: You.

GLENN: Right.

STU: Terrible move.

GLENN: She knows that ain't gonna last.

STU: That's against nature. I mean, really it hurts nature. Nature cries when she sees that coupling.

GLENN: Hang on. Sally is on the phone. Yes, Sally. Sally is -- Sally is gone, I guess.

STU: She must have got capped.

GLENN: Or traded. I'm not sure. She might be on the Laura Ingraham show right now. Could be.

STU: It's interesting. I just feel like it's maybe a little -- I don't know. I don't know that this system works for, I don't -- somewhere around 50% of the population. Seems like 50% of it would like it but then the other 50% -- I can't -- there's some, like, party line. Maybe it's on gender.

GLENN: Let me ask you this. Let me ask you this: You think that this is demeaning, treating women like meat.

STU: I would say yes.

Award-winning investigative journalist Lara Logan told Glenn Beck on the radio program Wednesday that a network of radical extremist terrorist organizations, which includes Antifa, are coordinating and escalating many of the violent riots in the wake of George Floyd's death.

Lara, who has done extensive reporting on Antifa, said it's "extraordinary" that so many Americans in the media and politics are defending the "very violent terrorist organization."

"[The media is] pretending that they care about journalism. They don't. They care about silencing, intimidating, destroying, annihilating, and getting us all to self-sensor so we don't cover any of the subjects they don't want us talking about," she said.

"For those of us who've followed [Antifa] for a while, and know what they're doing and what their agenda is, what has always been troubling is the way so many people in the media and in the political establishment have given them cover to operate," Laura added. "These are extremists. And you see a lot of parallels between extremists on the left and the right ... they pretty much operate the same way, exactly. And there's no difference between what Antifa is doing and the 'Brown Shirts' of Nazi Germany. Or the 'Black Shirts' of Mussolini."

She read the 10 points of action listed by an extremist group called the "Revolutionary Abolitionist Movement", which culminates with "Liberation begins where America dies."

Glenn recalled a prediction he made approximately 15 years ago, that "socialist, communists, radicals, anarchists, [and] Islamists would all work together ... they would all see the opportunity and work toward the same goal. And that's destruction of capitalism, and destruction of the Western world."

"A few years ago, I probably would not have agreed with you on that," Laura responded. "But I now see that you're absolutely correct."

Watch the video below to hear Lara detail evidence to expose the truth about Antifa:

Media targets Lara Logan for exposing the truth about Antifa

The media pretends to care about good journalism, but what they really care about silencing, intimidating, destroying, annihilating and getting us all to...


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The Trump-deranged media is calling the president a "coward" because he was moved to an underground bunker as riots erupted outside the White House over the weekend.

Former Secret Service agent Dan Bongino joined the "Glenn Beck Radio Program" Tuesday to set the record straight. He told Glenn that under Title 18, US Code 3056, the Secret Service has the authority to protect the president however they deem necessary, with or without his consent.

Dan explained that the severity of the White House riots, which resulted in at least 50 Secret Service agents being injured, would very likely have warranted overriding the president's preference on whether or not to take shelter.

"Shame on the media ... for painting this as some kind of situation where Trump ran like a coward," Dan said. "Which is totally false and made-up. [...] They're morons. These are imbeciles with double digit IQs who are only in this to aggravate an already-bad situation. And it's a shame, because they're really incentivizing this kind of stuff to happen."

He also made it clear that the so-called protests over the death of George Floyd were actually "very strategic" riots organized by "Antifa terrorists."

"It was not even a protest. It should have been, and could have been ... but that's not what it was. It was an insurrection. It was a riot," Dan stated.

"I can tell you, from sources of mine that were there, [who are] more than credible and unimpeachable, that the attack at the White House -- and that's what it was over a period of days -- was very organized. It was done using very strategic tactics," he added. "I want to be crystal clear, this was organized by Antifa terrorists. It's not a joke. It's not hyperbole. These were people that were committed to an insurrection that was thankfully put down."

Watch the video below for more details:

Dan Bongino: Trump is NOT a Coward Hiding in a Bunker


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The media has been trying to discredit BlazeTV's Elijah Schaffer after he recorded a disturbing video of a man being brutally beaten and stoned almost to death by rioters Saturday evening in Dallas.

Elijah joined Glenn Beck on the radio program Monday to set the record straight.

"The very dishonest far-left media is working tirelessly at the moment to completely, not only discredit myself, but they always say, 'Elijah Schaffer who works for Glenn Beck's BlazeTV.' As if that's an insult. So I'm going to clear the air right now," he told Glenn.

"There was a group of about, I would say 150 rioters. They were not protesters. They were breaking windows. They broke into a bank. They broke into a bar. They were looting alcohol and partying on the streets while breaking glass. These were not people who were grieving over black lives," he added. "The police had lost control of the city."

Elijah went on to describe the violent scene, detailing the events leading up to the brutal beating of a man who was apparently trying to defend a local bar. Elijah posted a video of the incident on Twitter Saturday night.

*Warning: graphic content*

"Rioters with rocks and bricks and bats and weapons, 150 or more, were accosting him as he stood in front of the bar," Elijah said. "Then they started stoning him, Glenn! Medieval! Throwing rocks and bricks.... We're in America. This is 2020. We do not stone people in the United States of America!"

Watch the video below for more details:

*Warning: graphic content*

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A new Pew Research Center report shows the death toll in the United States from COVID-19 is "heavily concentrated" in Democratic congressional districts.

According to the analysis, more than half of all COVID-19 deaths in the U.S. occurred in just 44 (approximately 10 percent of) congressional districts, and 41 of those 44 hardest-hit districts are represented by Democrats, while only three are represented by Republicans.

"A new Pew Research Center analysis of data on official reports of COVID-19 deaths, collected by the John Hopkins University Center for Systems Science and Engineering, finds that, as of last week, nearly a quarter of all the deaths in the United States attributed to the coronavirus have been in just 12 congressional districts – all located in New York City and represented by Democrats in Congress. Of the more than 92,000 Americans who had died of COVID-19 as of May 20 (the date that the data in this analysis was collected), nearly 75,000 were in Democratic congressional districts," Pew reported.

Filling in for Glenn Beck on the radio program this week, Pat Gray and Stu Burguiere argued that, while the coronavirus should never have been made into a partisan issue, the study certainly makes a strong statement in favor of GOP leadership.

Watch the video below:


Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multiplatform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.