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GLENN: So John McCain is dealing with the three possible candidates and I've heard a fourth today but I think this is just hype coming from Bloomberg. Fourth one is Bloomberg. John McCain, are you -- there's no way John McCain picks Michael Bloomberg.
STU: That makes no sense.
GLENN: No sense whatsoever.
STU: Yes, you know, they both agree on a couple of things like global warming and stuff.
GLENN: Second Amendment?
STU: Oh, my gosh.
GLENN: John McCain, the only thing he has going for him is he's good on the Second Amendment.
STU: That's not the only thing.
GLENN: One of them. I mean the war, too.
STU: But he is strong on the Second Amendment. Bloomberg's horrible on it.
STU: Not to mention in all --
GLENN: Why would you do that.
STU: What possible person would -- it doesn't make any sense at all. You are not going to win New York anyway.
STU: There's no way.
STU: The only thing you would want to do, the only possible validity to that is because John McCain is a crappy fundraiser and if you have a guy who's going to donate $200 million of his own money, there's some reason you can understand it.
STU: But it still doesn't make enough sense. They don't agree on -- I mean, they don't agree on enough.
GLENN: Yeah. So I mean, it would just be a horrible move. Then there's Crist out of Florida. Here's my problem with Crist. He's too tan. I know --
STU: Very good point.
GLENN: I know that that might be a little shallow, but I think he's too tan. He's --how do you get a tan like that?
STU: Well, maybe you are working outside.
GLENN: Wait, wait, wait, wait.
STU: You've got to admire a guy with a tan like that.
GLENN: I want to know, all of a sudden does the state assembly have some sort of a sunroof?
STU: I don't know the answer to that.
GLENN: Capital building?
STU: I like a guy who can keep things in perspective.
GLENN: Come on! Somebody with a tan that much, you're George Hamilton. You're laying by the pool all the time. I don't want George Hamilton in there.
STU: I don't know. George Hamilton might be a good candidate as they don't consider George Hamilton. I don't know.
GLENN: Nobody's considered George Hamilton.
STU: Maybe we should consider George Hamilton.
GLENN: Now let's go on to Governor Jindal. I like him.
STU: Yeah, I like him a lot. He's definitely a rising star in the party.
GLENN: But he's like 12.
STU: Yeah, he's pretty young and he's only been governor for, what, a year?
GLENN: Yeah, but he was a congressman.
STU: Still, though, I mean I don't know that -- I mean, --
GLENN: Oh, I'm sorry, yeah, Barack Obama's experience is so extensive. I mean, at least he's run a state.
STU: But I think there's -- look, I can't answer for the Democrats and why they're only -- their two candidates both have been in office for, like, 16 weeks.
STU: But, you know, I think Jindal would be great. I think that he's probably not going to get it there time just because he hasn't -- isn't the requirement, the legal requirement to be --
GLENN: I'm sorry. Hang on. Could you transfer that to my screen?
STU: To be President is 35, right?
GLENN: Would you check? If that's Jack Bauer, I'd like to know. Would you just -- it might be Jack Bauer. He might be saying, I need to talk to the President, I need you to -- could you just, could you just tap into their servers? It could be. I don't know. Is it Jack Bauer?
STU: I think we're getting updated information here. We'll have this to you in just a second. This is breaking.
GLENN: Was it Jack Bauer? Is there a bomb ready to go off? Does he need me to do anything? Because I'll do it. I'll lie my face off to the people in charge here.
STU: Well, of course you would.
GLENN: That's right. To help Jack? You bet.
STU: It wasn't Jack Bauer, though.
GLENN: Oh. Who was it?
STU: It was a much less shapely person. We're going to be getting him on the phone here in a minute because he's got inside information on one of the topics we're talking about.
GLENN: Which topic?
STU: Governor Crist.
GLENN: Governor Crist? I forget that he's the governor.
STU: Right. He's the governor.
GLENN: Oh, yeah. Much less shapely. Jeffy?
CALLER: Yes, Mr. Beck. I hear you talking to the governor to the great state of Florida.
GLENN: He's too tan.
VOICE: You know, he claims that that is from his heritage, his Greek heritage. So you have to account for that.
GLENN: Are you saying that basically what I was saying was he's too Greek?
VOICE: Then you're a racist.
GLENN: Is that what it is? I'm a racist? Right.
VOICE: Letting you know.
GLENN: He's too tan. How does a man -- I'm sorry. I know Greek people. You fade a little bit.
VOICE: You don't know Florida Greek people.
GLENN: The man should be inside working. The man should be inside working. I'm just saying.
VOICE: He's out meeting and greeting people is what it is.
GLENN: He should not be out meeting and greeting people.
VOICE: When he's out meeting and greeting people, the sun darkens his skin with the Greek heritage. That's what he says.
GLENN: Do you think that -- no, he's lying. It's the golf course! Do you --
STU: I give him credit for it.
GLENN: You know what? I want him to roll up his sleeve. I want to see if he has a farmer's tan. I want to see. And this is not in a weird way. I want him to take off his shirt. If he's tan all over, he's laying by the pool some place.
VOICE: He shouldn't have to prove himself to racist people like you.
GLENN: He should prove that he's not tan all over. I want to see his tan line.
STU: We should point out that, just so the audience is clear, that this is definitely in a weird way. Like, what you're doing now is definitely weird.
GLENN: No. You don't think we have a right to see his tan lines?
STU: Definitely not.
GLENN: Because I'm telling you, and this might be a good reason to hire him, I don't think he's actually even running the state. I think he's got all of his calls just transferred right to his pool. I want to talk to somebody who --
STU: That's who I want.
GLENN: I want to talk to somebody who has actually been on the phone with Governor Crist and then swear they heard, like, pool splashing. And he's like, no, I'm at a signing ceremony. That was a pool splash.
VOICE: Listen, he claims that he swims every day for exercise.
GLENN: Ah, now we're starting to get to the truth, uh-huh.
VOICE: That's what the man says.
GLENN: "I swim for exercise usually between 10:00 and 3:00 in the afternoon."