Super Glenn


'Super Glenn' as seen on the June 2007 cover of Fusion Magazine

GLENN: By the way, Stu.

STU: Yes.

GLENN: What did you think of the Good Morning America -- I think this is the first time I've been on Good Morning America since they promised me that they weren't going to, they weren't going to do something and then they just, and then they did it.

STU: It's been a while actually, yeah. I thought you did a good job. I thought you did as good a job as someone can while defending, you know, charges of sexism in pink pants. I mean, most people would be like --

GLENN: No, wait a minute.

STU: -- wouldn't understand.

GLENN: They promised me, they promised me -- again, they promised me that they would not show the pants, and they did.

STU: You are just trying to turn this into some media conspiracy against you but I would point out that no one in history has been filmed with pink pants when they were wearing normal person pants. So if you were just to not wear pink pants, they couldn't shoot the pink pants. Do you understand the concept?

GLENN: It was 75 degrees outside, they are stone washed, they are stone washed --

STU: Oh, oh.

GLENN: They are stone washed khakis. Happened to be pink.

STU: You are like Al Gore.

GLENN: I'm wearing no socks and a polo shirt. I go to do my television show and I put on a suit and tie. It doesn't even match the pink pants. Sometimes I'll wear shorts on the set as long as they don't show my pants.

STU: That's weird because, you know, Dan, I don't know about you but I feel like I've been in temperatures of 75 degrees before and I never was wearing pink pants in any of those situations.

DAN: Yeah, it's bizarre.

GLENN: I'm perfectly fine with my sexuality. Anderson Cooper came up to me in the hallway that day and he stopped dead in his tracks and he said, a man who's comfortable with his sexuality. And I said, Anderson, oh, yeah.

STU: It has nothing to do with your sexuality. It has to do with your taste, it has to do with your character.

GLENN: Can I tell you something?

STU: With your moral character.

GLENN: I think it's hysterical that they were charging me with sexism while I'm wearing pink pants.

STU: It is funny. It's almost like you did it on purpose. The problem is you didn't.

GLENN: Yes, I did.

STU: No, you didn't. We know you didn't.

GLENN: Yes, I did. I did. Like I'm going to take this from a guy who won't stop criminals from robbing a poor 80-year-old man.

STU: What are you talking? He wasn't 80 years old. He was like 35.

GLENN: That's your story.

STU: This is your fallback position now, isn't it?

GLENN: Dan is trying to protect Sarah and her unborn child from the New York mob as they're robbing this guy 80 years old and the street and he's like, help me, won't somebody help me. And Stu does nothing. He looks the other way. He doesn't even know what they look like.

STU: I love this. You act like you're so tough but we all foe exactly why you're tough. It's because of Adam. You're the biggest wuss in the world. You play all those Super Stu pits today. I've got Super Glenn ones for you today.

GLENN: You what?

STU: I have a Super Glenn thing and I'm responding to your attacks.

GLENN: I had Super Stu yesterday, faster than a speeding mullet, crying like a little girl, "I'm a little girl."

STU: I was not crying and I just looked the other way.

GLENN: Yeah, right. You just looked the other way and let this poor old man lie there in a pool of blood.

STU: Well, I did look the other way but I know he wasn't an old man and he wasn't in a pool of blood.

GLENN: That's your story, not what America heard.

STU: We all know how tough you are.

GLENN: Yeah, go ahead.

VOICE: Faster than a speeding tub of lard, more powerful than a strung-out supermodel and unable to leap anything because he's a giant ball of goo, it's Super Glenn.

VOICE: Oh, no. Oh, would you look at that? That is so, so sad. That woman is being assaulted. If that doesn't stop, there's a chance that my Porter house could be upended. Oh, the horrors, I just don't have time for a chef to recook this not to mention the additional marination that would be needed. Then I'd have to rush to acupuncture and I could very easily trip over a homeless. Adam, Adam, please take care of this little tussle for me and then grab me another ramiken of au jus.

VOICE: Proving once again he doesn't just dress like a chick, he acts like one, too.

GLENN: Let me tell you something. At least in that scenario the woman's saved.

STU: I agree. It just has nothing to do with you.

GLENN: In the end Super Glenn, I believe let's check the episode again. In the end didn't Super Glenn say, "Adam, go take care of that."

STU: I could say Adam, go take care of it. He doesn't listen to me.

GLENN: That's the point. That's exactly right because you are too busy running and crying like a little girl.

STU: But I'm just saying that I don't think that you pointing to Adam to do stuff for you is really that manual.

GLENN: Got another episode? I just proved this episode --

VOICE: Faster than a speeding tub of lard, more powerful than a strung-out supermodel and unable to leap anything because he's a giant ball of goo, it's Super Glenn.

VOICE: Oh, oh, my. Oh, my. Would you look at that. Toddler tossing. Mmm, throwing toddlers into incoming traffic. That is a shame. Adam, stop buffing my toenails for a second and look over there. Over there. If there was only a hero that could stop this, or someone with the vision to hire someone to stop it. Adam, my cuticles can wait. Attack the perps, as soon as you grab me one more diet Seltzer, please, with lime. Thank you.

VOICE: It's Super Glenn to the rescue proving once and for all that he doesn't just dress like a chick, he acts like one, too.

GLENN: I don't get pedicures, I don't drink Seltzer.

STU: You most certainly do.

GLENN: I do not.

STU: You don't drink Seltzer. You drink diet Seltzer.

GLENN: I don't drink Seltzer and never anything with lime. And again, Super Glenn to the rescue. Adam, go kill him. In fact, let me try this out.

VOICE: Faster than a speeding tub of lard. More powerful than a strung-out supermodel, and unable to leap anything because he's a giant ball of goo, it's Super Glenn.

VOICE: Oh. Oh, no. Will you look at all this? Crime is out of control. That person was just robbed. That person was just stabbed. That person was just cannibalized. Oh, that's it. Adam, stop cleaning out my individual pores for a moment and kill everyone in the city. Just put them out of their misery. Plus, it will clear up traffic when I drive home, or when you drive me home. Speaking of home, will you read me that bedtime story again? You know the one about the new wheat disease that brings a new era of pestilence? I love that one.

VOICE: It's super Glenn to the rescue proving once and for all that he doesn't just dress like a chick, he acts like one, too.

GLENN: Are you seriously trying to tell me that if Adam killed everybody in New York, it wouldn't be a better place?

STU: Well, that's a very good point.

GLENN: All right. Thank you. Super Glenn has done it again.

Most self-proclaimed Marxists know very little about Marxism. Some of them have all the buzzwords memorized. They talk about the exploits of labor. They talk about the slavery of capitalist society and the alienation caused by capital. They talk about the evils of power and domination.

But they don't actually believe what they say. Or else they wouldn't be such violent hypocrites. And we're not being dramatic when we say "violent."

For them, Marxism is a political tool that they use to degrade and annoy their political enemies.

They don't actually care about the working class.

Another important thing to remember about Marxists is that they talk about how they want to defend the working class, but they don't actually understand the working class. They definitely don't realize that the working class is composed mostly of so many of the people they hate. Because, here's the thing, they don't actually care about the working class. Or the middle class. They wouldn't have the slightest clue how to actually work, not the way we do. For them, work involves ranting about how work and labor are evil.

Ironically, if their communist utopia actually arrived, they would be the first ones against the wall. Because they have nothing to offer except dissent. They have no practical use and no real connection to reality.

Again ironically, they are the ultimate proof of the success of capitalism. The fact that they can freely call for its demise, in tweets that they send from their capitalistic iPhones, is proof that capitalism affords them tremendous luxuries.

Their specialty is complaining. They are fanatics of a religion that is endlessly cynical.

They sneer at Christianity for promising Heaven in exchange for good deeds on earth — which is a terrible description of Christianity, but it's what they actually believe — and at the same time they criticize Christianity for promising a utopia, they give their unconditional devotion to a religion that promises a utopia.

They are fanatics of a religion that is endlessly cynical.

They think capitalism has turned us into machines. Which is a bad interpretation of Marx's concept of the General Intellect, the idea that humans are the ones who create machines, so humans, not God, are the creators.

They think that the only way to achieve the perfect society is by radically changing and even destroying the current society. It's what they mean when they say things about the "status quo" and "hegemony" and the "established order." They believe that the system is broken and the way to fix it is to destroy, destroy, destroy.

Critical race theory actually takes it a step farther. It tells us that the racist system can never be changed. That racism is the original sin that white people can never overcome. Of course, critical race theorists suggest "alternative institutions," but these "alternative institutions" are basically the same as the ones we have now, only less effective and actually racist.

Marx's violent revolution never happened. Or at least it never succeeded. Marx's followers have had to take a different approach. And now, we are living through the Revolution of Constant Whining.

This post is part of a series on critical race theory. Read the full series here.

Americans are losing faith in our justice system and the idea that legal consequences are applied equally — even to powerful elites in office.

Rep. Devin Nunes (R-CA) joined Glenn Beck on the radio program to detail what he believes will come next with the Durham investigation, which hopefully will provide answers to the Obama FBI's alleged attempts to sabotage former President Donald Trump and his campaign years ago.

Rep. Nunes and Glenn assert that we know Trump did NOT collude with Russia, and that several members of the FBI possibly committed huge abuses of power. So, when will we see justice?

Watch the video clip below:


Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

The corporate media is doing everything it can to protect Dr. Anthony Fauci after Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) roasted him for allegedly lying to Congress about funding gain-of-function research in Wuhan, China.

During an extremely heated exchange at a Senate hearing on Tuesday, Sen. Paul challenged Dr. Fauci — who, as the director of the National Institute of Allergies and Infectious Diseases, oversees research programs at the National Institute of Health — on whether the NIH funded dangerous gain-of-function research at the Wuhan Institute of Virology.

Dr. Fauci denied the claims, but as Sen. Paul knows, there are documents that prove Dr. Fauci's NIH was funding gain-of-function research in the Wuhan biolab before COVID-19 broke out in China.

On "The Glenn Beck Program," Glenn and Producer Stu Burguiere presented the proof, because Dr. Fauci's shifting defenses don't change the truth.

Watch the video clip below:

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution, and live the American dream.

Critical race theory: A special brand of evil

wal_172619/Pixabay

Part of what makes it hard for us to challenge the left is that their beliefs are complicated. We don't mean complicated in a positive way. They aren't complicated the way love is complicated. They're complicated because there's no good explanation for them, no basis in reality.

The left cannot pull their heads out of the clouds. They are stuck on romantic ideas, abstract ideas, universal ideas. They talk in theories. They see the world through ideologies. They cannot divorce themselves from their own academic fixations. And — contrary to what they believe and how they act — it's not because leftists are smarter than the rest of us. And studies have repeatedly shown that leftists are the least happy people in the country. Marx was no different. The Communist Manifesto talks about how the rise of cities "rescued a considerable part of the population from the idiocy of rural life."

Studies have repeatedly shown that leftists are the least happy people in the country.

Instead of admitting that they're pathological hypocrites, they tell us that we're dumb and tell us to educate ourselves. Okay, so we educate ourselves; we return with a coherent argument. Then they say, "Well, you can't actually understand what you just said unless you understand the work of this other obscure Marxist writer. So educate yourselves more."

It's basically the "No True Scotsman" fallacy, the idea that when you point out a flaw in someone's argument, they say, "Well, that's a bad example."

After a while, it becomes obvious that there is no final destination for their bread-crumb trail. Everything they say is based on something that somebody else said, which is based on something somebody else said.

Take critical race theory. We're sure you've noticed by now that it is not evidence-based — at all. It is not, as academics say, a quantitative method. It doesn't use objective facts and data to arrive at conclusions. Probably because most of those conclusions don't have any basis in reality.

Critical race theory is based on feelings. These feelings are based on theories that are also based on feelings.

We wanted to trace the history of critical race theory back to the point where its special brand of evil began. What allowed it to become the toxic, racist monster that it is today?

Later, we'll tell you about some of the snobs who created critical theory, which laid the groundwork for CRT. But if you follow the bread-crumb trail from their ideas, you wind up with Marxism.

For years, the staff has devoted a lot of time to researching Marxism. We have read a lot of Marx and Marxist writing. It's part of our promise to you to be as informed as possible, so that you know where to go for answers; so that you know what to say when your back is up against the wall. What happens when we take the bread-crumb trail back farther, past Marxism? What is it based on?

This is the point where Marxism became Marxism and not just extra-angry socialism.

It's actually based on the work of one of the most important philosophers in human history, a 19th-century German philosopher named Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel.

This is the point where Marxism became Marxism and not just extra-angry socialism. And, as you'll see in just a bit, if we look at Hegel's actual ideas, it's obvious that Marx completely misrepresented them in order to confirm his own fantasies.

So, in a way, that's where the bread-crumb trail ends: With Marx's misrepresentation of an incredibly important, incredibly useful philosophy, a philosophy that's actually pretty conservative.

This post is part of a series on critical race theory. Read the full series here.