Glenn Beck: Worst voicemail ever

GLENN: Have you heard the -- this guy met a woman in a park. And ladies, may I just say you meet the best level of men in parks. But he met a fine woman at a park and they exchanged phone numbers which again, ladies, oh, that's brilliant. No, you should. You should. You're totally safe exchanging phone numbers with a man in a park.

So he says, I'll give you a call. She says, great, I'll call you back. There are two e-mails -- I mean, two voice mails that this man left. And gentlemen, this is the way to woo a woman. No, this is the -- let's try that again. Stations, edit that out because that sounded unprofessional. This is the way to woo a woman.

VOICE: Sorry I had to leave such a rush message with you when we met the other day. I just wanted to quickly give you my phone number, and I have to get the heck out of the area. In any event, I figure I better leave you a more detailed message.

GLENN: Can I just -- let me just stop here. Okay. Here we learned that you're calling a second time and you're sorry that you had to leave a rush message. You just had to get out of the area. I don't -- I don't think that there's -- I don't think there's any explanations that are necessary. I don't -- did anybody else think police sweep? I'm sure it's just me. APB? I'm sure that was just me. She's probably thinking, oh, there might have been like some other thing happening that wasn't related to an APB. It doesn't sound suspicious at all. So leave that in.

VOICE: I am single. I have no trouble meeting women. I mean, women approach me six, seven times a day.

GLENN: Stop. This is a way to really bring the woman in and basically saying, I'm a player. Whew, women are just, I have no -- this impresses a woman. A woman says, "Really? Hmmm. I thought I was the only one that you might have approached, in the park."

VOICE: I'm very particular about what I like. If you're extremely elegant. I couldn't take my eyes off of you and your friends were very jealous. Even if they say they weren't, they were envious of the fact that I approached you.

GLENN: Stop. An elegant woman likes to get right into jealous friends and I think that -- I think a woman also appreciates a man who knows himself, you know, somebody who's willing to go out there on a limb and say, I'm just going to say what everybody else is thinking; dig me.

VOICE: And I was very taken by you. Elegant women are very rare. I'm Greek and I'm very particular about what I like. So I'm giving you an opportunity here. I don't know if you pick up the messages on the weekend, but I'm working on a movie script. So I'm pretty much around all week.

GLENN: Stop, stop. (Laughing). This guy. "I'm working, by the way, Hollywood, I'm working on a movie script right now." (Laughing). Wouldn't you love to hear the response from the woman? I mean the actual response. How many times has she had friends over? You could have parties revolving around this voice mail, wouldn't you? If somebody left this voice mail, you would have it for -- you'd play it for friends and eventually somebody would say to you, let me hear it. And you go, you know what? This Friday I'm just having all my friends over and we're just going to play it. You can just, you can have a bottle of wine, sit back, listen, laugh.

STU: You should know this gets much, much worse.

GLENN: Here you go.

VOICE: I'm working on a movie script. So I'm pretty much around all weekend doing that. I left you my number, 416-918... this looks like a land line and if it is, you may not get the message until Monday. But when you do, call me and then we'll get together for coffee and chat and let the romance begin. You look very taken aback by my approach and I --

GLENN: You were in the park.

VOICE: Timidness, I hope it was just a little bit of shock at being approached so directly because I don't really date timid women because I'm a very direct, very passionate, very assertive man and I want a woman who's very independent and strong. So we'll talk about that, but I just wanted to formally introduce myself.

GLENN: You spook me.

VOICE: Now I have. You call me as soon as you have the courage to, okay, Olga? Talk to you soon. Bye.

GLENN: Okay. Courage, as soon as you have the courage to. You scare the crap out of me.

STU: If I had a guy who's saying I had to run out of the area.

GLENN: Yeah, I just had to get out of the area as soon as I could.

STU: Printing towards that white --

GLENN: You might have heard -- that was music in the background (making siren sounds). That was a disco song. We'll talk about it later, Olga.

STU: So obviously after a message like that, you don't call back.

GLENN: Yeah.

STU: The next message...

GLENN: You have to hear. We'll play that in just a second.

(LegalZoom.com)

GLENN: Okay, do we have time to play the rest of this? This is the callback. Apparently Olga didn't call. What was his name in Vladimir?

STU: Demetri.

GLENN: Demetri, that's right. Olga didn't call Demetri back. The man she met in the park, he likes a strong assertive woman but he was busy working on a movie script. Well, she didn't call back on Monday after that lovely message, but he did call back. And here's the second message.

VOICE: Hi there, Olga. It's Demetri calling again, the guy from the street. I left you a message several days ago. You said you were interested. Now, here's the way I work. I don't like leaving second messages, but I like you. You're a very elegant woman. You are very attractive but, you know, I don't play that game. I know your friends tell you not to return calls, you're playing games like you see on stupid TV shows. So here's how it's going to work. It is now 4:30 on Wednesday. Now, I'll assume, I'll assume that you've already left work because, you know, some people leave early, and I'll grant you that. And if I do not receive a phone call back from you by 3:00 Thursday afternoon, I'm no longer interested and you can erase my number. I don't play games like that. I'm completely single, I --

GLENN: Stop, stop, stop. You're single -- nobody snatched you up yet? Demetri, you've got to be kidding me. Really?

STU: He's completely single. Not a little bit.

GLENN: No. It's not like -- no, when I say single, I don't mean just unmarried. I mean no women around me whatsoever. Not a single chance I'm dating anyone.

STU: I haven't talk to anyone else in a month.

GLENN: Mom doesn't even return my phone calls. Nobody.

STU: Creditors avoid me.

GLENN: Yeah. Nobody calls. I'm at a pay phone right now. Is there anyone in the world that would call this guy back? "Hey, look, otherwise it's like a cross between a stalker and a telemarketer, you know? It's like if a stalker happened to be working for the, you know, what's that TV network, QVC, you know, where, look, you don't call in the next five minutes, you can erase our phone number. Just take our channel and put it on block. That's what -- I mean, that's what he sounds like. Go ahead, the rest of it.

VOICE: I'm completely single. I'm very intelligent. I'm great in bed, I make great money. Believe it or not, I'm a complete catch. I've only been single four months, had a long distance relationship, you know, been a year --

GLENN: When I was in prison.

VOICE: It didn't work out.

GLENN: Stop just a second. "I have a long distance relationship. I was in prison and she went into the government witness program. She was just trying -- she eventually had to move to the other side of the planet where they have no phone so I would leave her alone. But hey, hey, I'm out and --

STU: I'm really a catch, or like I was caught by police four months ago.

VOICE: I've only been single four months. I had a long distance relationship. You know, been a year. It's very tough to maintain it like that and it didn't work out. There's nothing wrong with me. As a matter of fact --

GLENN: Stop. I've just been checked out with prison doctors, nothing wrong with me. No diseases, nothing. I should point out nothing physically wrong with me.

VOICE: As a matter of fact, I'm one of the few men in the city that has nothing wrong with him. So I'm giving you that 3:00 deadline. If I don't hear from you, you lose my number. I'm erasing yours right now. You won't be hearing back from me.

GLENN: Good.

VOICE: So that's it. 3:00 tomorrow or you can just completely forget it. Now, I understand if you've got other issues like maybe you're not playing games. Maybe you had -- I don't know, maybe you were abused from childhood. Maybe your mother has cancer, you're going to chemo.

GLENN: Stop, stop. So Demetri, I was out of town. "Because your mother had cancer?" No, I was just out of town. "No, sorry, uh-uh. Moms don't have -- were you abused?" No. "Okay, mom having cancer, no abuse." No, uh-uh. I think, by the way, if you were abused, who's with me on thinking Demetri's the guy to heal you? Seriously.

VOICE: Maybe you're just a person who's extremely frightened or has an anxiety disorder. Maybe you're on some medication for that. I don't know. There could be another issue.

GLENN: Hang on just a second. You're very classy but maybe you're crazy. Maybe you're crazy. You're very, very classy. I -- seriously when you were pushing that garbage there in the park, I could barely smell the urine. Very classy woman. What -- I'm healthy, but you may be -- but I'd still like to date you.

VOICE: -- that I'm not aware of. And nobody says "Call me," hands a person a business card and then doesn't return calls.

GLENN: You are right.

VOICE: That's extremely passive-aggressive. You should actually look that up, passive-aggressive personality disorder.

GLENN: Oh, my gosh.

VOICE: And you let me know. If you've got issues, psychological issues, if you're on any sort of medication for anxiety or depression, I'm not interested, okay? But if you're psychologically normal and you haven't called me because there's been some horrible things that's happened in your life which prevented you, that's fine. But otherwise don't call me, okay? Bye.

GLENN: That's fantastic. We have an update now.

STU: We do have an update. This is going to shock you, I believe. Well, first of all, Demetri was a doctor. I say was a doctor.

GLENN: So was Mengele.

STU: That's a very good point. He was actually in the military originally and he was in the military records, it shows that he would leave his practice to go into the washroom and please himself several times a day, which is a problem. He eventually became --

GLENN: Wait, wait. What kind of doctor was he?

STU: I don't have that information. Not a good one. One that was apparently very busy.

GLENN: Yes. I'm sorry. The doctor is taking care of his little patient right now.

STU: Now, his medical career began to fall apart when the college suspended his license following complaints from female patients.

GLENN: Not from this guy.

STU: Shockingly enough, the man you just heard, the man that seems like such a (inaudible), nothing wrong with him. Pleaded guilty to two counts of sexual assault.

GLENN: You know what? I didn't know this update. So basically what you're saying is if you didn't get it from the phone message, nothing ever will get through to you. Is he, may I ask, is he in jail or is he still available?

STU: He really is, he really is very completely single, as he pointed out.

On the "Glenn Beck Radio Program" Monday, Harvard Law professor and lawyer on President Donald Trump's impeachment defense team Alan Dershowitz explains the history of impeachment and its process, why the framers did not include abuse of power as criteria for a Constitutional impeachment, why the Democrats are framing their case the way they are, and what to look for in the upcoming Senate trial.

Dershowitz argued that "abuse of power" -- one of two articles of impeachment against Trump approved by House Democrats last month -- is not an impeachable act.

"There are two articles of impeachment. The second is 'obstruction of Congress.' That's just a false accusation," said Dershowitz. "But they also charge him, in the Ukraine matter, with abuse of power. But abuse of power was discussed by the framers (of the U.S. Constitution) ... the framers refused to include abuse of power because it was too broad, too open-ended.

"In the words of James Madison, the father of our Constitution, it would lead presidents to serve at the will of Congress. And that's exactly what the framers didn't want, which is why they were very specific and said a president can be impeached only for treason, bribery, or other high crimes and misdemeanors," he added.

"What's alleged against President Trump is not criminal," added Dershowitz. "If they had criminal issues to allege, you can be sure they would have done it. If they could establish bribery or treason, they would have done it already. But they didn't do it. They instead used this concept of abuse of power, which is so broad and general ... any president could be charged with it."

Watch the video below to hear more details:



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On Friday's radio program, Bill O'Reilly joins Glenn Beck discuss the possible outcomes for the Democrats in 2020.

Why are former President Barack and First Lady Michelle Obama working overtime to convince Americans they're more moderate than most of the far-left Democratic presidential candidates? Is there a chance of a Michelle Obama vs. Donald Trump race this fall?

O'Reilly surmised that a post-primary nomination would probably be more of a "Bloomberg play." He said Michael Bloomberg might actually stand a chance at the Democratic nomination if there is a brokered convention, as many Democratic leaders are fearfully anticipating.

"Bloomberg knows he doesn't really have a chance to get enough delegates to win," O'Reilly said. "He's doing two things: If there's a brokered convention, there he is. And even if there is a nominee, it will probably be Biden, and Biden will give [him] Secretary of State or Secretary of Treasury. That's what Bloomberg wants."

Watch the video below to catch more of the conversation:

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On the "Glenn Beck Radio Program" Friday, award-winning investigative reporter John Solomon, a central figure in the impeachment proceedings, explained his newly filed lawsuit, which seeks the records of contact between Ukraine prosecutors and the U.S. Embassy officials in Kiev during the 2016 election.

The records would provide valuable information on what really happened in Ukraine, including what then-Vice President Joe Biden and his son Hunter were doing with Ukrainian energy company, Burisma Holdings, Solomon explained.

The documents, which the State Department has withheld thus far despite repeated requests for release by Solomon, would likely shed light on the alleged corruption that President Donald Trump requested to be investigated during his phone call with the president of Ukraine last year.

With the help of Southeastern Legal Foundation, Solomon's lawsuit seeks to compel the State Department to release the critical records. Once released, the records are expected to reveal, once and for all, exactly why President Trump wanted to investigate the dealings in Ukraine, and finally expose the side of the story that Democrats are trying to hide in their push for impeachment.

"It's been a one-sided story so far, just like the beginning of the Russia collusion story, right? Everybody was certain on Jan. 9 of 2017 that the Christopher Steele dossier was gospel. And our president was an agent of Russia. Three years later, we learned that all of that turned out to be bunk, " Solomon said.

"The most important thing about politics, and about investigations, is that there are two sides to a story. There are two pieces of evidence. And right now, we've only seen one side of it," he continued. "I think we'll learn a lot about what the intelligence community, what the economic and Treasury Department community was telling the president. And I bet the story was way more complicated than the narrative that [House Intelligence Committee Chairman] Adam Schiff [D-Calif.] has woven so far."

Watch the video below to catch more of the conversation:

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Carter Page, a former advisor to Donald Trump's 2016 presidential campaign, found himself at the center of the Russia probe and had his reputation and career destroyed by what we now know were lies from our own intelligence system and the media.

On the TV show Thursday, Page joined Glenn Beck to speak out about how he became the subject of illegal electronic surveillance by the FBI for more than two years, and revealed the extent of the corruption that has infiltrated our legal systems and our country as a whole.

"To me, the bigger issue is how much damage this has done to our country," Page told Glenn. "I've been very patient in trying to ... find help with finding solutions and correcting this terrible thing which has happened to our country, our judicial system, DOJ, FBI -- these once-great institutions. And my bigger concern is the fact that, although we keep taking these steps forward in terms of these important findings, it really remains the tip of the iceberg."

Page was referencing the report by Justice Department Inspector General Michael Horowitz, which revealed that the FBI made "at least 17 significant errors or omissions" in its Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act (FISA) applications for warrants to spy on Page, a U.S. citizen.

"I think this needs to be attacked from all angles," Glenn said. "The one angle I'm interested in from you is, please tell me you have the biggest badass attorneys that are hungry, starving, maybe are a little low to pay their Mercedes payments right now, and are just gearing up to come after the government and the media. Are they?"

I can confirm that that is the case," Page replied.

Watch the video clip below for a preview of the full-length interview:

The full interview will air on January 30th for Blaze TV subscribers, and February 1st on YouTube and wherever you get your podcast.

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