GLENN: 888 727 BECK. Now, I started telling about Mamma Mia. I said no man would ever go to Mamma Mia. I mean, and don't let your wife fool you into going. It is the worst experience of your life. It really, really is.

STU: And you know that because you're a man who went.

GLENN: I'm just trying to help people out. That's what I do.

STU: Right. Sure. Sure, that's what you do.

GLENN: I'm a guy who went just like you went.

STU: Right. I was getting Super Bowl tickets for it. You got nothing. You just went because that's what you do. That's what Glenn does in his frilly shirts.

GLENN: I got

STU: His ruffly shirts.

GLENN: I don't have ruffly all right, I got the satisfaction of being with my family and friends.

STU: As did I. I sat next to my wife, who hated it even more.

GLENN: And my eyes burned out for doing it. Oh, my gosh. Worst movie you've ever seen, Stu?

STU: It's certainly definitely one of the worst movies I've ever seen.

GLENN: I had to bribe Stu to get him to go and then he asked for Super Bowl tickets and I think that's unreasonable to go see a movie.

STU: You agreed to it. How could you think it's unreasonable.

GLENN: I went a little further. I went easy on you and said you had to wear some platform shoes. I strangely decided just to wear your wife's shoes.

STU: Other than my normal platform shoes that I wear.

GLENN: A video is up of GlennBeck.com of Stu and ladies shoes.

STU: Not comfortable. I don't know how you ladies do it. Hurts.

GLENN: But anyway, so I said that I would send him to the Super Bowl, which I have. Go ahead and open up. I've got it all lined up for you.

STU: All right. It's a picture, appears to be a picture, opening. Okay. It is hmmm.

GLENN: Go ahead. Read it out.

STU: It is, admit two to the Super Bowl, which are apparently bowling lanes in Bloomfield.

GLENN: Yes, yes. Come on, come on, Bloomfield?

STU: It says two round trip bus tickets on Greyhound from New York City to Sioux City, Iowa. Available from Sioux City to Bloomfield.

GLENN: I can't lock down the taxi thing. That's as close as I could get you. But it's the Super Bowl, and I have gone there was one in Ohio, there was one in upstate New York, but I wanted you I knew, you know, because you were really strangely excited about it. I knew you wanted, you know, something exotic. And so I figured it had to be the one in Iowa.

STU: You know what's interesting is I mean, I guess I can just have my lawyer call you later but this is not an official ticket to get me into that building. This is not this is something you created. There's no ticket here. So you have violated the contract and also you

GLENN: No, no.

STU: Yes.

GLENN: No, no, no. Two tickets to the Super Bowl. I've got the two Greyhound bus tickets for you to get you to the Super Bowl.

STU: Yeah, see

GLENN: You think this is my first day with this, Stu?

STU: You said that I would be admitted in to the game.

GLENN: No, I did not.

STU: Yes, you did.

GLENN: No, I didn't. And there is a game, by the way. It's bowling.

STU: Quote

GLENN: You can play all the games you like.

STU: Again, this does not even get me into the bowling alley. Quote, quote, quote

GLENN: You can walk into the bowling alley, you can get into the bowling alley, you can even participate in this game. I'm paying for the game and I'm paying for your two tickets to the Super Bowl.

STU: This is not this is not at all what you're promising. It is not at all what you've delivered.

GLENN: This is exactly what I how am I supposed to be a mind reader? How am I supposed to be a mind reader with you?

STU: I mean, no, I understand what you're doing and I think it's adorable and I think that when you know what? My retribution, my retaliation will not even be on the air. We will not get any benefit

GLENN: Really?

STU: For this program.

GLENN: That's just stupid. That's just stupid of you.

STU: It will hurt you, it will hurt your family and for generations. For generations.

GLENN: Do you see, do you see the anger?

STU: I went to Mamma Mia! Unlike you, no frilly shirts.

GLENN: Do you see the anger of the vegetarian sleeper cells? Look at the anger. See, I'm a conservative. I'm happy.

STU: It's unfortunate

GLENN: I'm sending you to the heartland. You got a problem with the heartland?

STU: It's unfortunate your wife will have to suffer for what you've done.

GLENN: It's bowling. You elitist vegetarian snob.

STU: It's unfortunate how bad your family will suffer for what you've done.

GLENN: Really?

STU: It's incredible how awful the rest of the family will pay for the sins of the black sheep, but it will occur.

GLENN: Isn't it amazing how he targets my family?

STU: Right to your family. I will drag your kids into this campaign so fast.

GLENN: I said since September 11th, I believe you are a sleeper cell.

STU: Yep, immediately.

GLENN: Now targeting my family. For what? Over what?

STU: It's no longer asleep.

GLENN: That I keep my promise and give you two tickets to get you to the Super Bowl. I got two tickets to the Super Bowl and then I'm allowing you to play in the game. You didn't even ask, can I play in the game. I may revoke the, you know, the whole gift certificate at the Super Bowl. I may give that to somebody else. I didn't promise that I'd let you participate in the game, but I went the extra mile for you to be able to have you bowl a few games. Hey, hey, midnight lanes open for somebody else. Enjoy your bus tickets to the Super Bowl.

STU: I mean, this is top level comedy, and I appreciate it.

GLENN: I know I enjoyed it.

STU: I know you did. I know you did.

GLENN: I did a lot.

STU: I know you did.

GLENN: But it's better than talking about Russia, isn't it?

STU: That's a really good point. We should do this again.

GLENN: Right. I mean, here's the deal, Stu. You and I can get on Greyhound and we can both go to the Super Bowl... or we can spend the weekend reading about Russia invading Georgia.

STU: That's true. That's true.

GLENN: See what I'm saying?

STU: And I appreciate also the selection of Greyhound. As we know

GLENN: Well, you might get hungry along the way.

STU: None has ever heard of bus rage until...

GLENN: You might get hungry. You might say, I'd like a little snack; you look tasty.

STU: I don't know what else you want me to say. It was a fantastic

GLENN: "You're welcome" would be nice or "Thank you."

STU: Would it be nice? Would it?

GLENN: "Thank you" would be nice, thank you, Glenn.

STU: You should make a decision now whether you are going to tell the audience what has been done to you. I would like to know if you will inform the audience about how, how much you regret what you've done today.

GLENN: I'm not afraid of you.

STU: Really?

GLENN: I'm not afraid of you.

STU: No, really? Well, I guess that has nothing to do with it.

GLENN: Stu, Stu, Stu.

STU: Uh huh.

GLENN: Look, when you engage in these kinds of things, you can either say, that was fun, that was fun.

STU: Right.

GLENN: Or you can get pissed off about it and then really turn it into something ugly knowing that it's what is called technically as mad, mutually assured destruction. But yes, you really wanna, you wanna? Okay. I mean, okay. We'll go for it.

STU: I mean, I don't believe I started this. You are the one who started this. Again I am Georgia in this situation. You are Vladimir Putin and I am the president of Georgia.

GLENN: All I'm doing, all I'm doing

STU: You are the big guy. You are the big guy bossing around the little guy who has done nothing wrong. This is what you are.

GLENN: The little guy who has gone to the Super Bowl for three years running, you are the little guy?

STU: You are Vladimir Putin. You might as well be KGB. You are now KGB.

GLENN: If I'm Vladimir Putin, you are an oligarch. I mean, don't try to play the little guy who won't go bowling in Iowa but demands to be sent free to the Super Bowl, NFL Super Bowl, and he's gone the last three years.

STU: Who won't go bowling in Iowa? You should know audience, the audience should know this, that you listen to a guy every day who went to Mamma Mia by choice and just made an oligarchy joke. That's the person you listen to every day. I want you to know it. Maybe you should consider other options.

GLENN: Well, have a good time. Hey, hey, make sure you get a bite to eat and if somebody says, "What cologne are you wearing," while you are sitting there, just make sure that they know it's not roast beef.