Glenn Beck: #1 NYT Gloatfest


NY Times #1 Best Seller - The Christmas Sweater by Glenn beck

VOICE: And now another book that beats Stephen King on the New York Times Best Seller list this week.

GLENN: Oh, mine!

VOICE: This has been books that beat Stephen King on the Glenn Beck program.

Welcome to the We beat Stephen King Gloat Fest 2008 on the Glenn Beck program.

GLENN: It's the Glenn Beck Gloat Fest. I mean, it's a little childish, sure, but the guy didn't think soldiers could read. Yeah. Hang on just a second. We have Dr. Fredley on the phone? Doctor, are you there?

DR. FREDLEY: Yes, I am.

GLENN: You are Dr. Stanley Fredley?

DR. FREDLEY: Dr. Stanley Fredley. I am a psychiatrist and one of my patients is Stephen King.

GLENN: Wouldn't this be violation of some sort of ethics?

DR. FREDLEY: Well, normally it would but I'm listening to your program today and it's very disturbing. You are not helping things.

GLENN: I mean, I just started. I mean, wow, it's almost like you knew in advance that I was going to have a Gloat Fest on Stephen King.

DR. FREDLEY: No, just immediately called the second I first heard the theme. My point here, though, is this is a man who wrote Cujo, this man wrote Salem's Lot, this man wrote The Stand. Do you realize this Firestarter? Do you remember?

GLENN: Yeah, I remember. What was the one about the prison thing?

DR. FREDLEY: The Green Mile?

GLENN: No, that was a good one, too. The other prison thing that, you know, the guy was, you know, an accountant and he was thrown in jail. Morgan Friedman was in the movie?

DR. FREDLEY: Don't know. I don't remember that.

GLENN: Shawshank Redemption. Yeah, that was it. You didn't know that was written by Stephen King?

DR. FREDLEY: No. He didn't tell me everything. Listen, I'm just a psychiatrist. I'm not his publicist.

GLENN: I'm sorry. Well, naming things that he had written. He's a very big, you know, very big author.

DR. FREDLEY: He's a very big author. And the fact that someone of your ilk has --

GLENN: Right. You mean -- wait, wait, wait. You mean the guy who beat him that he named Satan's -- what was it again?

DR. FREDLEY: Satan's mentally challenged younger brother.

GLENN: Right. And the fact that he called me that and said soldiers couldn't read. For me to beat him, that's weird, isn't it?

DR. FREDLEY: Well, yes, that's the point. Someone of your awful ilk somehow beats someone like Stephen King, I mean, do you know how long these sessions are supposed to be for me? I was supposed to go away this weekend.

GLENN: I'm sorry. I --

DR. FREDLEY: I'm just saying that, look, it's a little bit unfair because if Stephen King would have known that you would be there and somehow have a chance of beating him, he could have actually written a good book.

VOICE: And now another book that beat Stephen King on the New York Times Best Seller list this week.

GLENN: Boy, this is tough. I don't -- oh, shoot, what's the name of it? Oh, yeah. Mine.

VOICE: This has been books that beat Stephen King on the Glenn Beck program.

GLENN: Stu, may I ask, is it a little childish? Just a little?

STU: To say that the troops can't read? I think it is because when you have --

GLENN: No, I meant, you know, childish, you know, my part of it.

STU: Your part of it in criticizing him saying that the troops can't read? No, I don't think that's childish because it is a really --

GLENN: (Laughing). It's not just, it's not just the troops. It's that he has such contempt for the troops and anybody who is conservative that he would call me Satan's mentally challenged younger brother.

STU: What does that make him? What does it make him? If he's losing to you? You're a mentally challenged child -- brother of Satan! And he can't even beat him!

GLENN: Oh, we've had so few victories, conservatives. We've had so few victories. Oh, just spend a day and drink it in.

STU: (Laughing).

GLENN: This is almost as satisfying as Sean Penn going down to Venezuela and then being locked up, you know, and being in one of the gulags from Hugo Chavez and going, "Wait, Hugo, I thought we were friends. Hugo!" It's almost that satisfying.

STU: You just have to think -- and, you know, I don't know what Stephen King's life is like. I would imagine it's bizarre. But you just have to think there's at least a moment today where he --

GLENN: Questions everything.

STU: Questions everything on the planet.

GLENN: He's questioning, holy cow, maybe I'm over. Maybe -- am I over? I mean, we should look it up. When was the last time Stephen King released a book and it wasn't number one?

STU: I have no idea. You know, I'm not in the publishing industry per se but it's like I always thought when Stephen King releases a book, it's automatically number one.

GLENN: Of course it is.

STU: That's Stephen King. That's what he does.

GLENN: Of course it is. It's Stephen King. Look, I'm looking at the New York Times best selling list? David Baldacci, great, great author, Divine Justice came out; The Hour I First Believed, Wally Lamb. That's, what, two times in Oprah book club guy? Always number one. A Mercy by Toni Morrison; Gate House, Nelson DeMille. Here's a book that people have been waiting for for 25 years. Extreme Measures by Vince Flynn. He's a girl. Salvation in Death, isn't J. D. Robb -- what?


STU: Why is Vince Flynn a girl?

GLENN: He's a girl.

STU: Is that because he insulted you on his little liner?

GLENN: He's on my -- I don't remember that. He is on my crap list forever. J. D. Robb, I think that's a, what do they call that, a nom de plume?

STU: Pseudonym.

GLENN: Yeah, for somebody else famous. Nicholas Sparks at number 9. Stephen King, number 2. All of these people deserve to beat me, all of them. All of them.

STU: They are much better, much more accomplish.

GLENN: Yeah, and Stephen King deserves, you know -- I can't bring myself to say it, can't bring myself to say it, no. Everybody else, I wouldn't care if we were number 17 as long as we were number -- as long as Stephen King were number 18. It's just so satisfying.

STU: Glenn, as far as --

GLENN: Wait, wait, wait. I just have to say this.

VOICE: And now another book that beat Stephen King on the New York Times Best Seller list this week.

GLENN: There wasn't very many. Gosh -- oh, I remember. The Christmas Sweater.

VOICE: This has been books that beat Stephen King on the Glenn Beck program.

GLENN: Let me just say this. I know, what I know to be true is the philosophy of the Christmas Sweater, yeah. Anything can happen. Believe in it and it shall be. Oh, yes, my friend. And by the way, Stephen, I absolutely, you're one of my favorite writers. You're fantastic but now that, you know, now that I think we could say it's safe to say we're contemporaries (laughing). I don't know, that ending of It with the giant spider, not the way I would have done it but what do I know, New York Times best selling author that beat you. That's crazy. Okay.

Oh, wait a minute. Hang on. Dr. Fredley's back. Dr. Fredley's back on phone.

DR. FREDLEY: This is not Dr. Fredley.

GLENN: This is not Dr. Fredley? Who is this?

DR. FREDLEY: No, this is Sally. Yeah.

GLENN: This is Sally?

DR. FREDLEY: Sally King.

GLENN: Sally King?

DR. FREDLEY: Sally King.

GLENN: Who is Sally King?

DR. FREDLEY: I'm the wife or something of Stephen King.

GLENN: You're Stephen King's wife?

DR. FREDLEY: Yeah.

GLENN: Why do you sound like Dr. Fredley?

DR. FREDLEY: Dr. Fredley?

GLENN: Dr. Fredley almost sounds like Stu.

DR. FREDLEY: You mean the guy who's my husband's psychiatrist, Dr. Fredley?

GLENN: Yeah. This is really Sally King, Stephen King's wife?

DR. FREDLEY: Yeah, I think it's Sally, yeah.

GLENN: It's what?

DR. FREDLEY: Sally king.

GLENN: Go ahead.

DR. FREDLEY: Listen, I probably should just call up to a national radio show and announce this but I'm thinking about leaving him. I mean, if he loses to you, you, Glenn, that guy, the guy --

GLENN: All right, listen, this is something you should take up with your husband. This is something you should take up --

DR. FREDLEY: The guy on TV, that guy?

GLENN: That guy.

DR. FREDLEY: Who wrote a book about a shirt?

GLENN: It's a sweater.

DR. FREDLEY: A book about a shirt and he's beating my husband? What am I with this guy for? You've seen him, right? Why else would I be with him? I want him to write number one best sellers.

GLENN: I believe -- you know what, may I say something? I believe his wife's first name is Tabitha.

DR. FREDLEY: Yeah, they call me --

GLENN: Hello? Okay, we got it out of our system.

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Watch the video below to hear more from Ami Horowitz:

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Watch the video clip below or find the full episode here:

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Watch the video below to catch more of the conversation:

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