(Jingle Bells playing)
GLENN: It's another Christmas song I hate.
STU: This is to bring you to the mood of Christmas, Glenn. It's only a few more days.
GLENN: Are you kidding me? How can you get in the mood when President Bush was almost hit by a shoe yesterday?
STU: The attack of the killer shoe was a very tense situation.
GLENN: Was that -- did you not want him to do the Austin Powers? "A shoe? Who throws a shoe?"
STU: He had a pretty funny comeback to that.
GLENN: He did. You know what, did anybody else think, "He's a tough guy, man." You see him brush off the secret service like, "I got it, was a shoe. " Did you see that?
STU: What did he say, something about Size 10s or something?
DAN: He goes, I don't know what the guy believes in, but I could see his sole. That was one joke I saw. Quack, quack. George.
GLENN: That really hurts. That really hurts.
STU: Yeah, I thought he looked pretty solid there. I mean, he was --
GLENN: I mean, let's just get into this. Stop the music, for the love of Pete. I hate this song.
STU: That was Wayne Newton. That was the Wayne Newton.
DAN: Wait a minute. That was Wayne?
GLENN: No it wasn't. All right. Anyway, apparently the soles of the shoes are considered the ultimate insult in the Arab world. I mean, what? How can we expect to get along with these people? What is -- so anyway, you know, remember when they pulled down the -- I'm sorry. Do you remember when we pulled down the statue of Saddam Hussein? They all attacked it with their shoes. Do you remember seeing that? I didn't even think about that except they were beating him with the shoes, but now I understand it. The soles of the shoes are the ultimate insult in the Arab world. We're going to post the video in the newsletter today. It's free at GlennBeck.com if you want that. But the guy stands up and fires that shoe at the President, and I've got to tell you, this guy must be -- I don't know if he's on Olympic shoe toss team or what, but he had a good arm. I mean, I'm just saying, Yankees, you should give him a look. I mean, you didn't make the playoffs this year. I'm just trying to help out. But I think the President was equally as impressive. He had -- I mean, does he have like cat-like reflexes? It was like... I mean, he was just there. Ducked down and avoided the incoming shoe, then popped back -- it was like Whack-a-Mole. Just pop back up, then the guy threw the other shoe, which was amazing that he could get the other shoe off and throw it. It was a little high and wide this time, but he threw it before security could tackle. I mean, that's pretty crappy security. I think all reporters should have to do what we have to do at the airport, take your shoes off. But I think he handled it really well. Poise, class. Wouldn't you be a little freaked if you're the President of the United States and you're in Iraq and somebody throws a shoe at you? I mean, you don't know what's coming at you. Could be one of those, you know, those Chinese stars? I'm just saying. It could have been. Who knows? What are those stars called? You know those martial arts stars? Could have been one of those. Bush, I mean, he just waved off the lead secret service agent just like, "It's a shoe." I liked it.
Now many of the Iraqi reporters immediately apologized to the President and it was, in fact, an Iraqi journalist who first tackled the shoe-tossing idiot, and that's the story. But here's the story that's going to be coming out in the mainstream media that will only get worse as Jon Stewart and his ilk play the incident and that is Bush cowered at the attack. That's what one of the reports said, that he cowered at the attack. Watch the tape, man. Bush is like rock solid. He looks like Sugar Ray Leonard out there, he was so quick. Plus, what is he supposed to do? Just sit there and take a Hushpuppy to the head? "I just want to... okay, that or..." what was he supposed to do? Plus, I thought this was the most dangerous place in the world. I mean, is it at all possible that a shoe could have been a shoe bomb? Yet the President, you know, did the exact opposite of cowering, but the media liked to cover it as cowering. Watch it yourself. A reporter from the Modesto Bee, which, if you can't trust the paper called the Bee, what -- no, come on. You had, like, the newsletter. When you were in second grade, you had the Bee newsletter, didn't you? "We're just buzzing with all kinds of news. Bzzz." The Modesto Bee. Anyway, they opined that there is no doubt that many Iraqis will view his outburst as courageous. Wow. Maybe they're calling this bravery because they are not used to this freedom thing yet.
Under Saddam Hussein that would be 100% without a doubt considered bravery, you know, because if the guy tried to toss the shoes at Saddam Hussein, I guarantee you that Saddam would have fed the guy to a pet tiger and watched him get eaten for kicks. So far that I know, George Bush hasn't done that. Under a free Iraq, this is just another stupid idiot protestor trying to draw attention to himself. That's the great thing about free societies. You can throw a shoe at the President and not get a death sentence! How sweet is that? But hey, no, seriously, Iraq, glad everybody appreciates the no more "Mass grave situation" thing. No, seriously, you'd like Saddam back, is that it? You miss the fresh smell of rotting corpses? Did you like the "If you say something about Saddam, you and your entire family will be raped, tortured and killed" policy? Is that what you really -- I know that you're upset and everything that the government, you know, the government-issued rapes have now ended, but trust me, the freedom thing might work out into your favor. I'm just saying. Because you can actually try to humiliate the President and keep all of your limbs. Who would have thunk it? I mean, really?