**WARNING: Watch this video at your own risk! Any vomiting, gnashing of teeth, gauging of eyes or suicide is the result of your choice to watch Helen Thomas on video. The Glenn Beck Program assumes no responsibility for your decision to watch the old hag.
GLENN: I didn't think Barack Obama's speech was all that. I mean, it was nice and it was great and I was a little shocked that there wasn't some more -- it was just, it was fingerprintless, and it wasn't stirring. I mean, this guy has given stirring speeches of, "I have... to go... to the bathroom," and it's inspiring. Yesterday I didn't really -- were you inspired by that? I didn't really -- I mean, it was nice, don't get me wrong, but there wasn't -- there was not a single catch phrase in it, well, except for the end. I liked the end. Oh, what did the old preacher say? He said, when brown can stick around, when yella can be mella and white will do what's right. Oh, man. There's nothing better than on the day when we inaugurate an African-American that whity is called racist. I love that. It's the kind of "Bring is all together" that only Jeremiah Wright or apparently this preacher that Barack Obama knows. And USA Today described President Obama as smiling and nodding his head during that.
I was actually watching Fox and Friends. I was pissed that I wasn't on with them this morning because I'm driving in and I'm listening to them and they say, they said, "I just thought that was funny." Funny? He's praying to God, in a prayer he's praying to God for the day when brown can stick around. I don't know. Brown can be in the White House now, running the free world for four years. Maybe he means he's praying for the day when we can give him just eight. When brown can stick around, when yella can get mella. I don't know about you but those Asians are all hopped up on something. When yella can be mella. And when white can do what's right. Amazing, just amazing.
But then there was the balls that happened, and the green ball was going on and Al Gore went, of course, to the green ball, which is weird because he left in an SUV. You know, I just must have been one of those things, couldn't get a green car. Oh, if the government would just mandate that he would have driven a green hybrid, it would have been so much better. But there's no mandates there. So what was he supposed to do? And then Helen Thomas. Helen Thomas made quite a statement. Do you have it? Here it is.
THOMAS: If JFK was the most inspired president she knew, who is the least inspired? She says in her opinion...
GLENN: Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! Who do you think it was? Who do you think that was? What a question. Probing minds want to know. Well, it is Helen Thomas. So maybe it was Franklin Pierce. Could have been. I think it was a couple of presidents before Abraham Lincoln. So might have been Franklin Pierce that she worked under, so to speak. I feel like the opposite of Homer Simpson. You know how he is like... mmm, doughnuts. You think that about Helen Thomas. You're like....
Fun Fact: Did you know vomir is the French translation for the English phrase to vomit.
Okay. Although, Helen Thomas naked with doughnuts? Never thought I could make a dream of a doughnut bad, did you? I did it. That's my job. Stretch the horizon, you know? Push the edges.
So she went on to answer this question and so much more. Listen up.
VOICE: President George W. Bush. You're quoted as saying he's the worst president in history.
THOMAS: That's because he came in with the whole idea of war. He misses most unkind. Not only that but his conservative views on everything. I'm a liberal. I was born a liberal.
GLENN: Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! Stop! She's a liberal? Wait a minute. She thinks that George Bush is the worst and she's a liberal? "That's because I'm a liberal. I was born a liberal." You were born a liberal? Hmmm. Well, that just goes to prove that you don't have to actually read anything, learn anything, study anything out, ask any tough questions, have any kind of introspection because "I was born a liberal." Oh, that's weird, I wasn't born with my views. I was born with rights. Liberals generally try to take them away. But I wasn't born with my views. But it's good to see that liberals can be.
THOMAS: I'll be one until I die. What else should the reporting be, when you see so much and when we have such great privilege and access to the truth.
VOICE: Well, you know, it's interesting because I'm sure somebody from the right would --
GLENN: Wait, did you -- hang on, I've got to hear this. Somebody from the right is sitting here. Go ahead.
VOICE: If you ask the question, what else should a reporter be and they would go, oh, I don't know, how about objective?
GLENN: Stop, stop, stop! Can we go back? Could we go back? Listen to this! Listen to this! Play it back. Tell me what sticks out. Go back to, "I'm a liberal. That's the only thing you should be."
VOICE: You know, it's interesting because I'm sure that if somebody from the right was sitting here, they would say if you asked the question, what else should a reporter be, they would say, "Oh, I don't know, how about objective?"
GLENN: Stop. Stu, before I hear her answer from a liberal that was born and going to die liberal, what sticks out in that question?
More Helen for the fellas...
STU: If someone from the right was there maybe?
STU: If. So there isn't one.
STU: That neither one of them.
GLENN: If someone from the right were here, they should say maybe objective, as opposed to, "Well, a lot of people, normal people, common sense people would say maybe a journalist should be balanced, objective. That's a right point of view." That's crazy people on the right, they just want you to be objective.
STU: Well, at least, you know, I would think if anyone, more than anyone would say that, even more than someone from the right, it would be in theory a journalist who is in theory has gone to school for decades to train themselves to be objective to cover stories without a liberal bias.
GLENN: That question doesn't say everything, it shows -- well, first of all, they are doing a story. Who is interested in Helen Thomas and asking her the question, "Who's the worst president," on inaugural day, "Who's the worst president." If I were sitting around in a meeting and I said, "Hey, guys, I'm going to ask Helen Thomas who she thinks the worst president is," don't you think everybody in the room would go, "George Bush"? Of course that's the answer. So where's the news there? And if it doesn't show the bias of the media on just "Let's trash George Bush" and the bias of the media, "Well, someone from the right should say you're objective." Not someone from the right saying, "Well, you should have the right, you should be conservative." Someone from the right saying you should be objective! Unbelievable. How does she respond? My head's starting to hurt.
THOMAS: You're not asking people not to think, not to care, are you?
GLENN: Stop, stop, stop! Not asking people to think? "You are not asking them to stop thinking, do you?" You didn't think! You were born this way! It doesn't require any thinking! You just know!
STU: Wow, she just equated being objective with not thinking.
GLENN: Or caring.
STU: Or caring. If that is not journalism in Washington.
GLENN: This, this has to be -- is this just audio or is this a --
STU: I think there's video, too.
DAN: Thankfully, thankfully there is video, Glenn, of this.
GLENN: What network did this? Can you ad the porn music? That is so hot. We've got the sexy video of Helen Thomas being objective. Mmm. This has to be on TV. Send this over to Fox. This is unbelievable.
DAN: Her answer continues, Glenn. I don't know if you --
GLENN: Oh, dear god. I don't know if I can take it. All right, go ahead.
THOMAS: You are asking them to give a fair reporting, both sides and so forth, and I did it. For 57 years I was never, never accused of bias in my copy.
GLENN: From everybody, except from everybody that wasn't liberal! Oh, jeez. Send that over to TV. Got to have that. Oh, America's got to see that. By the way, the people who are preaching to us, we all have to come together, yesterday in Houston defaced a George H. W. Bush statue that said "No more bush" and I think they've blurted out but it looks to be the shape of a Nazi symbol on it, a swastika. That's the first thing I think of when I think of the Bushes. Of course, not the Kennedys. I don't think that about the Kennedys even though Gerald P. Kennedy was the one who said we have nothing to worry about with Hitler and that Jewish problem that he's dealing with, none of our business. I definitely don't think, you know, swastika with the Kennedys. I immediately think of that with the Bushes.