Glenn Beck: Garofalo ruining '24'




Related Video - Janeane Garofalo made an appearance on Countdown with Keith Olbermann recently in which she claimed that the only reason hundreds of thousands of people attended Tea Parties was racism.


GLENN: I declare that I can no longer watch 24, unless they no, no, no, I can't take the commercials! I can't take the, "You know what we really are concerned about here on 24? Global warming. It's no joke. We'll all be dead before this episode is over if we don't act right now."

STU: That is agonizing.

GLENN: I can't take them.

STU: TiVo the commercials.

GLENN: I do TiVo. They still piss me off.

STU: You are very sensitive.

GLENN: And Janeane Garofalo.

STU: She's terrible.

GLENN: Going to end up being a good person, too. You watch. "See, everybody loves her. She was very minded, she was..." arghhh!

STU: It really is, just looking back at it, it's very difficult to understand why they would choose her. She has no buzz to her, she's not a good actress in any way.

GLENN: No, she has buzz to her. She does have buzz. Here she is, this is on Keith's show, right? Keith Olbermann, you know, the Shakespearian performer. She's on Keith Olbermann. She's talking about the tea parties. She's got lots of buzz on this one. Listen to what Janeane Garofalo, star of 24, has just said about the tea parties.

GAROFALO: Let's be very honest about what this is about. It's not about bashing Democrats, it's not about taxes. They have no idea what the Boston tea party was about. They don't know their history at all. This is about hating a black man in the White House. This is racism straight up.

GLENN: Okay, hang on just a second. Let me just go through this again. Let me just go through this again. Get ready to stop and start it. You ready, Dan? Here we go. Take.

GAROFALO: Let's be very honest about what this is about. It's not about bashing Democrats. It's not about taxes. They have no idea what the Boston tea party was about.

GLENN: Okay. It's not about the Boston tea party because you don't have any idea what history is. You're not smart enough. You're not smart enough to even understand history, and it's certainly not about taxes, okay? You're not smart enough, you don't understand taxes, you don't understand history. You don't know what the Boston tea party was. They're being honest. Let's just be honest about this. They're being honest: You're too stupid to even be honest.

GAROFALO: They don't know their history at all. This is about hating a black man in the White House. This is racism straight up.

GLENN: Hating a black man.

STU: It's unbelievable. Yeah, because when she's saying this, "Let's be honest about it," what she's saying is not let's be honest about what the truth is, at least to me. What she's saying is let's be honest about what we really think about these people. Let's be honest about what our opinion is about

GLENN: You are giving her too much credit.

STU: Really?

GLENN: You are giving her too much.

STU: I'm not giving her a lot of credit.

GLENN: Oh, I know that, but you're still giving her too much credit. They have no fear. Stu, they have no fear of saying anything. They don't care. They can say anything they want because they are not held to the same standard as conservatives are. They have no idea. I welcome Janeane Garofalo to walk in my shoes for a months. She would melt down. She wouldn't be able to stand the scrutiny. She would not be able to stand it. She couldn't take it.

I mean, Stu and I were talking today. I get Google alerts, all of these things taking me apart. Stu said, did you see the Charles Barkley thing on you? And I said, what? He said, yeah, he was on I don't even know what show. Do you even know what show?

STU: No, I don't know.

GLENN: Okay, he was on some late night show. It may be Leno, I don't know. I'm so used to now I mean, here, where's my bag? Did you see People magazine?

STU: No.

GLENN: People magazine. People magazine, next to Vivica, what's her name?

STU: Fox?

GLENN: Yeah, is she the one with the middle initial B? I don't know who she is because she's black. So I just hate her.

STU: You hate her. That's why you were the he tea parties.

GLENN: Exactly yes! Let's just be honest about it. So I'm going through People magazine not me. My daughter going through People magazine: Dad. "What?" "People magazine?" Yeah, I know. It sucks. What about it? "You're in People magazine." Why am I in People magazine? You should see what they write. You should see what they wrote about me.

STU: An interesting analysis of our financial. Is that what it was?

GLENN: Oh, and I'm a dummy and everything else.

STU: People magazine published it.

GLENN: I know. I welcome, I welcome these people to try to walk in the shoes of a conservative. Try to walk in the shoes. Try this. Don't just try to walk in the shoes of a conservative. Walk in the shoes of a conservative libertarian because that's a double whammy. If you don't want to play the game of Washington, oh, Sarah Palin, here you come. Tina Fey is just licking her chops. Janeane Garofalo, they're not afraid. "Let's be honest. Let's just say what we really mean." They have no fear. Try being Miss what is it from the Miss USA pageant. Miss California. You have the opportunity in America, the great thing you can choose. But in my world it's between a man and a woman.

STU: An opinion that's shared by about 60 to 70% of people.

GLENN: But not the elites. Not the right people. Not the people that control the media. Not the people that control opinions. Not the people who are so open minded. No, no, no, she's immediately a hate monger. She's immediately dismissed. You can't have that opinion. Who are the people really that are afraid to say anything? And I'm telling you, America, I am so proud of my country because my countrymen are no longer afraid. They're starting to stand up. This is about racism? Really? Show me the person that hates Barack Obama because he's black and I'll show you the biggest idiot on the planet. I mean, jeez, give us more credit. We can actually hate people for real legitimate reasons. And I don't know a soul that hates Barack Obama. I know people who strongly disagree with him. I do. But I don't hate him. I pray for the man every night! I don't hate the man. I strongly disagree with him.

STU: What would the I was trying to think of what the opposite of this, like what could a conservative say? Essentially being like Barack Obama hates the people in the tea parties because they're white.

GLENN: Yes, yes.

STU: Like would you ever say that? It's such a ridiculous idea, and these people who claim to be so intellectually superior trot out an argument that is that weak.

GLENN: Wait. But wait, but wait, there's more.

STU: Is there?

GLENN: People who actually say that the white man is Satan, that the white man is the problem with it, i.e., Jeremiah Wright, they don't have a problem with that racism. They don't have a problem with the racism of Jeremiah Wright.

Now, I haven't been to racist meetings. I haven't been to Klan meetings, nor would I go to a Klan meeting. I don't know people like that, but Barack Obama does. But apparently that's not a problem. So don't tell me that Janeane Garofalo has a problem being honest. Jeremiah Wright can say that white men are trying to kill the black man because they're black. He can say that they are Satan.

STU: Creating the AIDS virus.

GLENN: That they created the AIDS virus. You can say any of that stuff without any ramification, without any. But God forbid you say this government is out of control, and it was out of control under George W. Bush and it's out of control now. God forbid that you say this president has spent twice the amount that George Bush did. He doubled the debt of George W. Bush, and George W. Bush doubled the debt from Clinton! God forbid you say that and couple it with this: I think we should get out of both of these parties. I think both of these parties are bad. That's the next whammy that's coming, gang.

When did conservative when did the conservative value have anything since Ronald Reagan, when have the Republicans really been for the true conservative movement, small government, sovereignty? George W. Bush I'm sorry. George H. W. Bush was the one who was like, yeah, we got a new world order thing going on right here. No, thank you, no, thank you. "You know what we're going to do? We're going to strengthen the United Nations, we're going to make it work right for the first time." No, thank you.

STU: There's been elements of it over the years but never

GLENN: They only give you enough to say, "Well, okay, better than that guy." What did we just go through? John McCain: Well, better than that guy. We've got to stop doing that. You're not throwing your vote away. You are throwing your vote away when you say "Better than that guy." I just did it, gang. Better than that guy, no. No more. When you read the American Progressivism and you see the disease, the disease that is the progressive movement, it started over 100 years ago, you see what they're doing and it is both the Republicans and the Democrats.

So the only one that really should have fear in this country is the one who is telling the truth, the one who is walking down the center path and saying, you know what, wherever I find truth, whether it's under a rock of Republicans or the rock of Democrats, those people are right. Those people are the ones that are going to be the end of this corrupt power in Washington. And don't think they don't know it.

So Janeane Garofalo is on saying that we're all racists. That's all this is about is racism. Can we go back to 2003, Janeane Garofalo?

GAROFALO: There has been so many inappropriate responses to dissent, which is the most patriotic thing you could do, and the First Amendment guarantees everyone's right to speak out.

GLENN: Okay, wait a minute. Hang on. There's so many inappropriate, like being that the tea parties are only about racism? See, this is where you have to be consistent, and everybody drops the ball on this. Who was with me during the Iraq war and the buildup? Who was listening to this show? The media, they can't transcript? What? They can't even begin to understand the concept that I've got 30 years of broadcast and I've got, you know, the last eight years you can look at what I was saying about George W. Bush. What I was saying about dissent, I was the guy on the air defending the people in Hollywood saying you cannot call them un American. There's nothing more American than speaking out, and now is the time to speak out. That's what you do: Speak out. However, my problem with Hollywood was they wanted it both ways. They wanted to be able to speak out and be loved and have us go watch their movies. No, sorry. If I can no longer see you as anybody about the woman who, you know, sold out her country overseas which is now no different than Barack Obama. So, you know, what do I know. You know, and I can no longer enjoy your country music, Dixie Chick, well, then that's not my fault. I can no longer enjoy your music because I think of you doing that overseas. That doesn't make me un American and it doesn't make you un American. That makes us capitalists, which again I see that we don't really embrace anymore in this country. So again what do I know.

Back to Janeane Garofalo again. This is current day Janeane Garofalo on Keith Olbermann's show.

GAROFALO: The Olympic brain inside a rightwinger or Republican or conservative or your average white power activist is much larger in their head space than in a reasonable person, and it's pushing against the frontal lobe. So their synapses are misfiring.

GLENN: I didn't know she played a doctor on TV or was a doctor, but in other words, this is what's wrong with you: Your brain is too big. It doesn't work right. It's just too big because it's making everything misfire and that's why you become such a white power racist.

STU: Right. And conservatives equal white power.

GLENN: Yes. That's all you are. If you are a conservative, you are white power. Here she is back in 2003.

GAROFALO: Like I said, it's very Archie Bunker, antiintellectual, unfair way to treat dissent.

VOICE: All right, so we're in favor of celebrities talking or Republican figures talking about politics if they want to?

GAROFALO: I'm in favor of any citizen talking in favor if they want to.

GLENN: Right. Just don't make unfair comments about them if they do.

STU: Like, you know, calling them white power.

GLENN: That their brain's too big.

STU: Frontal lobe.

GLENN: And it's a white power synapse thing. Oh, okay.

Here's our number, 888 727 BECK.

STU: What were you saying about 24?

GLENN: Hmmm?

STU: I can't remember what your opinion was on 24.

GLENN: I can't remember. It's just something pushing on my frontal lobe. So I can't really figure that out. I hate that show. Too many, too many minorities on it.

It's time for our April 29, 2019 edition of our Candidate Power Rankings. We get to add two new candidates, write about a bunch of people that have little to no chance of winning, and thank the heavens we are one day closer to the end of all of this.

In case you're new here, read our explainer about how all of this works:

The 2020 Democratic primary power rankings are an attempt to make sense out of the chaos of the largest field of candidates in global history.

Each candidate gets a unique score in at least thirty categories, measuring data like polling, prediction markets, fundraising, fundamentals, media coverage, and more. The result is a candidate score between 0-100. These numbers will change from week to week as the race changes.

The power rankings are less a prediction on who will win the nomination, and more a snapshot of the state of the race at any given time. However, early on, the model gives more weight to fundamentals and potentials, and later will begin to prioritize polling and realities on the ground.

These power rankings include only announced candidates. So, when you say "WAIT!! WHERE'S XXXXX????" Read the earlier sentence again.

If you're like me, when you read power rankings about sports, you've already skipped ahead to the list. So, here we go.

See previous editions here.

20. Wayne Messam: 13.4 (Last week: 18th / 13.4)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

A former staffer of Wayne Messam is accusing his wife of hoarding the campaign's money.

First, how does this guy have "former" staffers? He's been running for approximately twelve minutes.

Second, he finished dead last in the field in fundraising with $44,000 for the quarter. Perhaps hoarding whatever money the campaign has is not the worst idea.

His best shot at the nomination continues to be something out of the series "Designated Survivor."

Other headlines:

19. Marianne Williamson: 17.1 (Last week: 17th / 17.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Marianne Williamson would like you to pay for the sins of someone else's great, great, great grandparents. Lucky you!

Williamson is on the reparations train like most of the field, trying to separate herself from the pack by sheer monetary force.

How much of your cash does she want to spend? "Anything less than $100 billion is an insult." This is what I told the guy who showed up to buy my 1989 Ford Tempo. It didn't work then either.

Other headlines:

18. John Delaney: 19.7 (Last week: 15th / 20.3)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Good news: John Delaney brought in $12.1 million in the first quarter, enough for fifth in the entire Democratic field!

Bad news: 97% of the money came from his own bank account.

Other headlines:

17. Eric Swalwell: 20.2 (Last week: 16th / 20.2)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

The Eric Swalwell formula:

  • Identify news cycle
  • Identify typical left-wing reaction
  • Add steroids

Democrats said there was obstruction in the Mueller report. Swalwell said there “certainly" was collusion.

Democrats said surveillance of the Trump campaign was no big deal. Swalwell said there was no need to apologize even if it was.

Democrats said William Barr mishandled the release of the Mueller report. Swalwell said he must resign.

Democrats say they want gun restrictions. Swalwell wants them all melted down and the liquid metal to be poured on the heads of NRA members. (Probably.)

16. Seth Moulton: 20.6 (NEW)

Who is Seth Moulton?

No, I'm asking.

Moulton falls into the category of congressman looking to raise his profile and make his future fundraising easier— not someone who is actually competing for the presidency.

He tried to block Nancy Pelosi as speaker, so whatever help he could get from the establishment is as dry as Pelosi's eyes when the Botox holds them open for too long.

Moulton is a veteran, and his military service alone is enough to tell you that he's done more with his life than I'll ever do with mine. But it's hard to see the road to the White House for a complete unknown in a large field of knowns.

Don't take my word for it, instead read this depressing story that he's actually telling people on purpose:

"I said, you know, part of my job is take tough questions," Moulton told the gathered business and political leaders. "You can ask even really difficult questions. And there was still silence. And then finally, someone in the way back of the room raised her hand, and she said, 'Who are you?' "

Yeah. Who are you?

15. Tim Ryan: 21.6 (Last week: 14th / 20.7)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

When you're talking to less than sixteen people in Iowa one week after your launch, you don't have too much to be excited about.

Ryan did get an interview on CNN, where he also talked to less than sixteen people.

He discussed his passion for the Dave Matthews Band, solidifying a key constituency in the year 1995.

Other headlines:

14. Tulsi Gabbard: 25.2 (Last week: 14th / 25.9)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Tulsi Gabbard torched Kamala Harris in fundraising!!!!! (Among Indian-American donors.)

No word on who won the coveted handi-capable gender-neutral sodium-sensitive sub-demographic.

She received a mostly false rating for her attack on the Trump administration regarding its new policy on pork inspections, a topic not exactly leading the news cycle. Being from Hawaii, the state which leads the nation in Spam consumption, she was probably surprised when this didn't go mega viral.

Other headlines:

13. Andrew Yang: 27.2 (Last week: 12th / 27.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Yang has a few go-to lines when he's on the campaign trail, such as: "The opposite of Donald Trump is an Asian man who likes math." Another is apparently the Jeb-esque "Chant my name! Chant my name!"

Yang continues to be one of the more interesting candidates in this race, essentially running a remix of the "One Tough Nerd" formula that worked for Michigan Governor Rick Snyder.

I highly recommend listening to his interview with Ben Shapiro, where Yang earns respect as the only Democratic presidential candidate in modern history to actually show up to a challenging and in-depth interview with a knowledgeable conservative.

But hidden in the Shapiro interview is the nasty little secret of the Yang campaign. His policy prescriptions, while still very liberal, come off as far too sane for him to compete in this Stalin look-alike contest.

Other headlines:

12. Jay Inslee: 30.4 (Last week: 11th / 30.4)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

If you read the Inslee candidate profile, I said he was running a one-issue climate campaign. This week, he called for a climate change-only debate, and blamed Donald Trump for flooding in Iowa.

He also may sign the nation's first "human composting" legalization bill. He can start by composting his presidential campaign.

Other headlines:

11. John Hickenlooper: 32.2 (Last week: 10th / 32.0)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

John Hickenlooper was sick of being asked if he would put a woman on the ticket, in the 0.032% chance he actually won the nomination.

So he wondered why the female candidates weren't being asked if they would name a male VP if they won?

Seems like a logical question, but only someone who is high on tailpipe fumes would think it was okay to ask in a Democratic primary. Hickenlooper would be better served by just transitioning to a female and demanding other candidates are asked why they don't have a transgendered VP.

Other headlines:

10. Julian Castro: 35.7 (Last week: 9th / 36.2)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Lowering expectations is a useful strategy when your wife asks you to put together an Ikea end table, or when you've successfully convinced Charlize Theron to come home with you. But is it a successful campaign strategy?

Julian Castro is about to find out. He thinks the fact that everyone thinks he's crashing and burning on the campaign trail so far is an "advantage." Perhaps he can take the rest of the field by surprise on Super Tuesday when they finally realize he's actually running.

Other headlines:

9. Kirsten Gillibrand: 38.1 (Last week: 8th / 37.8)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Gillibrand wants you to know that the reason her campaign has been such a miserable failure so far, is because she called for a certain senator to step down. The problem might also be that another certain senator isn't a good presidential candidate.

She also spent the week arm wrestling, and dancing at a gay bar called Blazing Saddle. In this time of division, one thing we can all agree on: Blazing Saddle is a really solid name for a gay bar.

Other headlines:

8. Amy Klobuchar: 45.1 (Last week: 7th / 45.5)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Klobuchar is attempting a run in the moderate wing of the Democratic primary, which would be a better idea if such a wing existed.

She hasn't committed to impeaching Donald Trump and has actually voted to confirm over half of his judicial nominees. My guess is this will not be ignored by her primary opponents.

She also wants to resolve an ongoing TPS issue, which I assume means going by Peter Gibbons' desk every morning and making sure he got the memo about the new cover sheets.

Other headlines:

7. Elizabeth Warren: 45.3 (Last week: 6th / 46.0)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Elizabeth Warren is bad at everything she does while she's campaigning. I don't really even watch Game of Thrones, and the idea that Warren would write a story about how the show proves we need more powerful women makes me cringe.

Of course, more powerful people of all the 39,343 genders are welcome, but it's such a transparent attempt at jumping on the back of a pop-culture event to pander to female voters, it's sickening.

We can only hope that when she's watching Game of Thrones, she's gonna grab her a beer.

Other headlines:

6. Cory Booker: 54.9 (Last week: 5th / 55.5)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Booker is tied with Kamala Harris for the most missed Senate votes of the campaign so far. He gets criticized for this, but I think he should miss even more votes.

Booker is also pushing a national day off on Election Day—because the approximately six months of early voting allowed in every state just isn't enough.

Of course, making it easier to vote doesn't mean people are going to vote for Booker. So he's throwing trillions of dollars in bribes (my word, not his) to seal the deal.

Bookermania is in full effect, with 40 whole people showing up to his appearance in Nevada. Local press noted that the people were of "varying ages," an important distinction to most other crowds, which are entirely comprised of people with the same birthday.

Other headlines:

5. Robert Francis O’Rourke: 60.2 (Last week: 4th /62.6)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Kirsten Gillibrand gave less than 2% of her income to charity. The good news is that she gave about seven times as much as Beto O'Rourke. Robert Francis, or Bob Frank, also happens to be one of the wealthiest candidates in the race. His late seventies father-in-law has been estimated to be worth as much as $20 billion, though the number is more likely to be a paltry $500 million.

He's made millions from a family company investing in fossil fuels and pharmaceutical stocks, underpaid his taxes for multiple years, and is suing the government to lower property taxes on a family-owned shopping center.

He's also all but disappeared. It's a long race, and you don't win a nomination in April of the year before election day. If he's being frugal and figuring out what he believes, it might be a good move.

But it's notable that all the "pretty boy" hype that Bob Frank owned going into this race has been handed over to Mayor Pete. Perhaps Beto is spending his time working on curbing the sweating, the hand gestures, and the issues with jumping on counters like a feline.

Other headlines:

4. Pete Buttigieg: 62.9 (Last week: 3rd / 62.9)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

When we first put candidates in tiers earlier this year, we broke everyone into five categories from "Front Runners" to "Eh, no." In the middle is a category called "Maybe, if everything goes right," and that's where we put Pete Buttigieg.

Well, everything has gone right so far. But Mayor Pete will be interested to learn that the other 19 candidates in this race are not going to hand him this nomination. Eventually, they will start saying negative things about him (they've started the opposition research process already), and it will be interesting to see how Petey deals with the pressure. We've already seen how it has affected Beto in a similar situation.

The media has spoken endlessly about the sexual orientation of Buttigieg, but not every Democratic activist is impressed. Barney Frank thinks the main reason he's getting this amount of attention is because he is gay. And for some, being a gay man just means you're a man, which isn't good enough.

When you base your vote on a candidate's genitals, things can get confusing.

Other headlines:

3. Kamala Harris: 68.6 (Last week: 1st / 69.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

There are a couple of ways to view the Harris candidacy so far.

#1 - Harris launched with much fanfare and an adoring media. She has since lost her momentum. Mayor Pete and former Mayor Bernie have the hype, and Kamala is fading.

#2 - Harris is playing the long game. She showed she can make an impact with her launch, but realizes that a media "win" ten months before an important primary means nothing. She's working behind the scenes and cleaning up with donations, prominent supporters, and loads of celebrities to execute an Obama style onslaught.

I tend to be in category 2, but I admit that's somewhat speculative. Harris seems to be well positioned to make a serious run, locking up more than double the amount of big Clinton and Obama fundraisers than any other candidate.

One interesting policy development for Harris that may hurt her in the primary is her lack of utter disgust for the nation of Israel. There's basically one acceptable position in a Democratic primary when it comes to Israel, which is that it's a racist and terrorist state, existing only to torture innocent Palestinians.

Certainly no one is going to mistake Harris for Donald Trump, but a paragraph like this is poison to the modern Democratic primary voter:

"Her support for Israel is central to who she is," Harris' campaign communications director, Lily Adams, told McClatchy. "She is firm in her belief that Israel has a right to exist and defend itself, including against rocket attacks from Gaza."

Just portraying the rocket attacks as "attacks" is controversial these days for Democrats, and claiming they are responses to attacks indicates you think the Jeeeewwwwwwwws aren't the ones responsible for the start of every hostility. Heresy!

Someone get Kamala a copy of the 'Protocols of the Elders of Zion' before she blows her chance to run the free world.

2. Bernie Sanders: 69.2 (Last week: 2nd / 68.3)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

If Bernie Sanders hates millionaires as much as he claims, he must hate the mirror. As a millionaire, it might surprise some that he donated only 1% to charity. But it shouldn't.

It's entirely consistent with Sandersism to avoid giving to private charity. Why would you? Sanders believes the government does everything better than the private sector. He should be giving his money to the government.

Of course, he doesn't. He takes the tax breaks from the evil Trump tax plan he derides. He spends his money on fabulous vacation homes. He believes in socialism for thee, not for me.

Yes, this is enough to convince the Cardi B's of the world, all but guaranteeing a lock on the rapper-and-former-stripper-that-drugged-and-stole-from-her-prostitution-clients demographic. But can that lack of consistency hold up in front of general election voters?

If Bernie reads this and would like a path to credibility, clear out your bank account and send it here:

Gifts to the United States
U.S. Department of the Treasury
Funds Management Branch
P.O. Box 1328
Parkersburg, WV 26106-1328


Other headlines:

1. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr.: 78.8 (NEW)

Joe has run for president 113 times during his illustrious career, successfully capturing the presidency in approximately zero of his campaigns.

However, when the eternally woke Barack Obama had a chance to elevate a person of color, woman, or anything from the rainbow colored QUILTBAG, he instead chose the oldest, straightest, whitest guy he could find, and our man Robinette was the beneficiary.

Biden has been through a lot, much of it of his own making. Forget about his plagiarism and propensity to get a nostril full of each passing females' hair, his dealings while vice president in both Ukraine and China are a major general election vulnerability— not to mention a legal vulnerability for his children. But hey, win the presidency and you can pardon everyone, right?

His supposed appeal to rust belt voters makes him, on paper, a great candidate to take on Trump. The Clinton loss hinged on about 40,000 voters changing their mind from Hillary to Donald in a few states—the exact areas where victory could possibly be secured by someone named "Middle Class Joe" (as he alone calls himself.)

No one loves Joe Biden more than Joe Biden, and there's a relatively convincing case for his candidacy. But we must remember this unquestionable truth: Joe Biden is not good at running for president.

He's a gaffe machine that churns out mistake after mistake, hoping only to have his flubs excused by his unending charisma. But, will that work without the use of his legendary groping abilities? Only time, and a few dozen unnamed women, will tell.

Also, yes. Robinette is really his middle name.

If only Karl Marx were alive today to see his wackiest ideas being completely paraded around. He would be so proud. I can see him now: Sprawled out on his hammock from REI, fiddling around for the last vegan potato chip in the bag as he binge-watches Academy Awards on his 70-inch smart TV. In between glances at his iPhone X (he's got a massive Twitter following), he sips Pepsi. In his Patagonia t-shirt and NIKE tennis shoes, he writes a line or two about "oppression" and "the have-nots" as part of his job for Google.

His house is loaded with fresh products from all the woke companies. In the fridge, he's got Starbucks, he loves their soy milk. He's got Ben & Jerry's in the freezer. He tells everyone that, if he shaved, he'd use Gillette, on account of the way they stand up for the Have-Nots. But, really, Marx uses Dollar Shave Club because it's cheaper, a higher quality. Secretly, he loves Chic-Fil-A. He buys all his comic books off Amazon. The truth is, he never thought people would actually try to make the whole "communism" thing work.

RELATED: SOCIALISM: This is the most important special we have done

Companies have adopted a form of socialism that is sometimes called woke capitalism. They use their status as corporations to spread a socialist message and encourage people to do their part in social justice. The idea of companies in America using socialism at all is as confusing and ridiculous as a donkey in a prom dress: How did this happen? Is it a joke? Why is nobody bursting out in laughter? How far is this actually going to go? Does someone actually believe that they can take a donkey to prom?

Companies have adopted a form of socialism that is sometimes called woke capitalism.

On the micro level, Netflix has made some socialist moves: The "like/dislike" voting system was replaced after a Netflix-sponsored stand-up special by Amy Schumer received as tidal wave of thumb-downs. This summer, Netflix will take it a step further in the name of squashing dissent by disabling user comments and reviews. And of course most of us share a Netflix account with any number of people. Beyond that, they're as capitalist as the next mega-company.

Except for one area: propaganda. Netflix has started making movie-length advertisements for socialism. They call them "documentaries," but we know better than that. The most recent example is "Knock Down the House," which comes out tomorrow. The 86-minute-long commercial for socialism follows four "progressive Democrat" women who ran in the 2018 midterms, including our favorite socialist AOC.

Here's a snippet from the movie so good that you'll have to fight the urge to wave your USSR flag around the room:

This is what the mainstream media wants you to believe. They want you to be moved. They want the soundtrack to inspire you to go out and do something.

Just look at how the mainstream media treated the recent high-gloss "documentary" about Ilhan Omar, "Time for Ilhan." It received overwhelmingly bad ratings on IMDb and other user-review platforms, but got a whopping 93% on the media aggregator Rotten Tomatoes.

This is exactly what the media wants you to think of when you hear the word socialism. Change. Empowerment. Strength. Diversity. They spend so much energy trying to make socialism cool. They gloss right over the unbelievable death toll. BlazeTV's own Matt Kibbe made a great video on this exact topic.

Any notion of socialism in America is a luxury, made possible by capitalism. The woke companies aren't actually doing anything for socialism. If they're lucky, they might get a boost in sales, which is the only thing they want anyway.

We want to show you the truth. We want to tell you the stories you won't hear anywhere else, not on Netflix, not at some movie festival. We're going to tell you what mainstream media doesn't want you to know.

Look at how much history we've lost over the years. They changed it slowly. But they had to. Because textbooks were out. So people were watching textbooks. It was printed. You would bring the book home. Mom and dad might go through it and check it out. So you had to slowly do things.

Well, they're not anymore. There are no textbooks anymore. Now, you just change them overnight. And we are losing new history. History is being changed in realtime.

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You have to write down what actually is happening and keep a journal. Don't necessarily tell everybody. Just keep a journal for what is happening right now. At some point, our kids won't have any idea of the truth. They will not have any idea of what this country was, how it really happened. Who were the good guys. Who were the bad guys. Who did what.

As Michelle Obama said. Barack knows. We have to change our history. Well, that's exactly what's happening. But it's happening at a very rapid pace.

We have to preserve our history. It is being systematically erased.

I first said this fifteen years ago, people need clay plots. We have to preserve our history as people preserved histories in ancient days, with the dead see scrolls, by putting them in caves in a clay pot. We have to preserve our history. It is being systematically erased. And I don't mean just the history of the founding of our country. I mean the history that's happening right now.

And the history that's happening right now, you're a problem if you're a conservative or a Christian. You are now a problem on the left, if you disagree and fall out of line at all. This is becoming a fascistic party. And you know what a fascist is. It doesn't matter if you're a Democrat or a Republican or an independent. If you believe it's my way or the highway, if you believe that people don't have a right to their opinion or don't have a right to their own life — you could do be a fascist.

Christianity might seem pretty well-protected in the U.S., but that's not the case in many parts of the globe.

On Easter Sunday, suicide bombers made the news for killing 290 innocent Christians in Sri Lanka and injuring another 500. On Tuesday, ISIS claimed responsibility for the massacre. Of course, the Western world mourned this tragic loss of life on a holy day of worship, but we forget that this isn't an isolated incident. Indeed, Christians are discriminated at extreme levels worldwide, and it needs to be brought to light. And whenever we do highlight brutal persecutions such as the Easter bombings in Sri Lanka, we need to call them what they are — targeted attacks against Christians. Sadly, many of our politicians are deathly afraid to do so.

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A 2018 Pew Research Center study found that Christians are harassed in 144 countries — the most of any other faith — slightly outnumbering Muslims for the top of the list. Additionally, Open Doors, a non-profit organization that works to serve persecuted Christians worldwide, found in their 2019 World Watch List that over 245 million Christians are seriously discriminated against for their religious beliefs. Sadly, this translates into 4,136 Christians killed and 2,625 either arrested, sentenced, imprisoned, or detained without trial over the year-long study period. And when it comes to churches, those in Sri Lanka were merely added to a long list of 1,266 Christian buildings attacked for their religion.

These breathtaking stats receive very little coverage in the Western world. And there seems to be a profound hesitation from politicians in discussing the issue of persecution against Christians. In the case of the Sri Lanka bombings, there's even a reluctance to use the word "Christian."

After the horrific Pittsburgh Synagogue and New Zealand Mosque shootings, Democrats rightfully acknowledged the disturbing trend of targeted attacks against Jews and Muslims. But some of these same politicians refer to the Sri Lanka bombings with careless ambiguity.

So why is it so hard for our leaders to acknowledge the persecutions Christians face?

Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, for instance, certainly did — calling the incursions "attacks on Easter worshippers." Understandably, the term confused and frustrated many Christians. Although, supporters of these politicians argued the term was appropriate since a recent Associated Press report used it, and it was later picked up by a variety of media outlets, including Fox News. However, as more Democrats like 2020 presidential candidate Julián Castro and Rep. Dan Kildee continued to use the phrase "Easter worshippers," it became clear that these politicians were going out of their way to avoid calling a spade a spade.

So why is it so hard for our leaders to acknowledge the persecutions Christians face? For starters, Christianity in democratic countries like the U.S. is seen differently than in devastated countries like Somalia. According to Pew Research, over 70% of Americans are Christian, with 66% of those Christians being white and 35% baby boomers. So while diverse Christians from all over the world are persecuted for their faith—in the U.S., Christians are a dominant religion full of old white people. This places Christians at the bottom of progressives' absurd intersectional totem poll, therefore leaving little sympathy for their cause. However, the differing experiences of Christians worldwide doesn't take away from the fact that they are unified in their beliefs.

By refusing to name the faith of the Sri Lankan martyrs, politicians are sending a message that they have very little, if no, concern about the growing amount of persecution against Christians worldwide.

Martyrs don't deserve to be known as "Easter worshippers." They should be known by the Christian faith they gave their lives for. Decent politicians need to call the tragedy in Sri Lanka what it is — a vicious attack on the Christian faith.

Patrick Hauf (@PatrickHauf) is a writer for Young Voices and Vice President of Lone Conservative. His work can be found in the Washington Examiner, Townhall, FEE, and more.