Glenn dines with George Soros on earth day

GLENN: From Radio City in Midtown Manhattan, this is the third most listened to show in all of America. Hello, you sick twisted freak. Welcome to the program. Glad you're here. So I had dinner last night and I had this big business meeting. I went to dinner, and I go to this place. I've never been there before. Really good restaurant, and I walk in and I'm like, oh, jeez, this is one of those snotty places. I hate those places, you know, where everybody where you've got like 400 waiters and then you're like, I don't know. Because you're like, I don't know what the tip can I just leave you a 5? What do I so anyway, we go to this place and George Soros sits right behind me.

STU: (Laughing).

GLENN: Yeah. The waiter comes up and luckily I really thought, when I walked in I thought, oh, it's one of those snotty places. Because it wasn't somebody was taking me to dinner. And so I go to this place and my wife is waiting for me and I'm like, honey, I've got to go to this dinner. So I'm just like, okay, let's go to dinner. And I get there and I walk in and, you know, they made me take off my Converse sneakers before I went and I'm like, why? I always wear Converse. And they're like, Glenn, you don't understand this restaurant. I'm like, oh, no! And I walk in, but the waiters are really, really cool. You know, the waiters are just like, hey, let me tell you something. Let me tell you what's going on. And then when they get to the table, they're like, so we have some nice fish for you? So anyway, the waiters come up, and when I'm in the appetizer, one of them leans down and he says, so how is everything with the appetizer, Mr. Beck? Do you like it? George Soros is hitting right behind you. Is everything a ll right? And I said, you've got to be kidding me. And he said, no. So I did, you know, he walks away and I'm like doing the yawn thing. I'm like, oh, my gosh: It's George Soros.

STU: You're telling me that you had dinner on Earth Day.

GLENN: On Earth Day.

STU: With George Soros.

GLENN: With George Soros well, not really with George Soros, but let's just say a couple of things. First of all, if you're invested in things that he's invested in and he's got anything to do with running things, you might want to reconsider that. He doesn't look well. It's like he had just like a touch of the Ebola virus. You know, when I looked at him, I turn around and I look at him and I'm like, oh, my gosh. You know, I wanted the waiter to go up, "Could I get you another cocktail or maybe a trip to the hospital?" I mean, he really

STU: Well, there's a lot of pressure in running the entire world.

GLENN: I know. He's got to tell the president what to do and everything else. So it's really but he didn't look a touch of the Ebola, his eyes were all red, I mean like blood shooting out of them red. I really thought it was like a I don't know. It was like, you know, a statue of the Madonna where she's, you know, crying blood and stuff in those horror movies. That's what it was like.

STU: Is it possible he got Earth day confused with 4/20?

GLENN: May have. It was really red, Stu. I really think he may have had to dab his eyes just a little bit from the blood. Have you ever seen that James Bond movie from the guy who was playing poker?



Stuntman Stu puts his life in danger

EPA’s Cleanup and Disposal Guidelines for Compact Fluorescent Light Bulbs

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: Yeah, it was kind of like that. It was like, okay, he's bleeding from his eyes; that's spooky. And he's George Soros. Double spookout!

STU: Now, did he order meat? Because as we know, it's bad for the environment.

GLENN: I didn't ask.

STU: It's worse than transportation.

GLENN: I didn't ask.

STU: For the globe.

GLENN: I didn't ask.

STU: I'd like to know that.

GLENN: Yeah, I didn't ask. I wasn't facing him. I should have asked. I should have asked. I wasn't facing him. So I don't know because I was just catching glimpses. Didn't look good. But what the nice thing was, as soon as I found that out, my table started talking about global warming. Wow, this global warming thing sure is a scam, huh? Whoa. I mean, think about all the money that's being poured into global warming campaigns, and the poll numbers on it just keep going down.

STU: (Laughing).

GLENN: I'm just glad I don't have any money in that because, boy, that's a scam. Yeah, I was just trying to see I'd look at the waiter.

STU: If you do nothing else in your career but ruin one George Soros dinner, I think I

GLENN: May I say I can die a happy man today. I can die a happy man today. You know what matters, well, media doesn't matter. Media doesn't matter. Oh, wow. Move on!

So anyway, then I get home and my wife says, you got an e mail from somebody. They want you to see something. And it's, I think it was from Media Matters. Did you see this, Stu? It was an alert that Media Matters put out that I had threatened somebody's life to kill them on the show last night?

STU: Really?

GLENN: Yeah. You didn't see this?

STU: No.

GLENN: Oh, you have to see this. Did you see the show last night? I know you were getting ready. You were part of the show last night.

STU: No.

GLENN: Yeah. I had the fluorescent light bulb.

STU: No, I didn't hear. I was listening, but what happened?

GLENN: Well, I took Oscar, who's one of the cameramen.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: And I took Oscar. I said, come here, Oscar, right at the top of the show. He wouldn't leave his camera and I'm like, come here. So he left the camera and he came over to me, I grabbed him around the neck and I took the light bulb and I said, I mean it, man, I'll kill him right now! I mean it! I got a light bulb and I'll kill him right now! They put an alert out like I'm serious. These guys are so

STU: What a humorless group.

GLENN: Just, I mean and so I wish I would have known that while Soros was sitting behind me so I could say look what your people are doing. They're destroying their own credibility, of which they have none. They're destroying their do you know how much money you're wasting with these clowns?

STU: Well, yeah. You're just destroying credibility for these people. It's like what you were talking about with negative interest rates. You really can't go below zero, can you?

GLENN: I think they're trying. I do think they're trying.

STU: Well, I mean, I was put in an unhealthy work environment last night because you forced me to break

GLENN: Stu, I am not kidding you. They actually gave me a warning prior to. I mean, how big is our studio?

STU: Very it's a large studio.

GLENN: 2,000, 3,000 square feet?

STU: Probably, yeah.

GLENN: So it's a very large studio, but we're in you know, because of this studio, we're in the inside of the building. There are no windows or anything else. There's only two exits and there's no windows. And so we're in this gigantic space. There's probably eight of us on the floor at all times, and the director came to me, in all seriousness came to me prior to.

Now, remember this is Fox. So you can imagine what, like, crazy networks would, what kind of they would never let you walk out on a stage with a fluorescent light bulb.

STU: Right.

GLENN: They came to me and they said, "Listen. There is a mask for you on the stage in case this does break. Please don't break this, but there is a mask on stage for you because if you drop it, you'd be the closest. Please put your mask on right away." And I went, "Yeah, right, I'm going to do that." And he just looked at me like, I ain't joking. And I said, it's a light bulb. And he said, listen, I've already instructed the crew, if you drop this, you're to put your mask on, they're to open up wide, leave the cameras on and leave the floor.

STU: That's unbelievable.

GLENN: Unbelievable, unbelievable.

STU: As you were talking and doing monologues, I was getting in my ear, look, are we sure we're okay with dropping this thing? I want to make sure that we done have any incidents here. I want to make sure everyone around you is safe. I'm like, what do you think I'm going to do? Throw it at a passerby?

GLENN: Did you see the people? They were outside and the people had to wear a mask.

STU: Yeah. You know, the crew and stuff was all lining up. Like they were, like, actually looking I swear this is true looking at the flags and making sure they didn't stand downwind.

GLENN: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Fox was not screwing around.

STU: They were not kidding. And I told them, I'm like, if you've ever seen 40 Year Old Virgin, in that movie they are all just sitting out behind, you know, the Circuit City type store and they've got those long tubular fluorescent lights and they are just bashing them over each other as a joke. I mean, you know, I know it's bad and everything else but to me, I don't think I actually took a legitimate risk but then I come in this morning and Joe is telling me about some special filter they had on the camera. Did you see this? This special

GLENN: Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's unbelievable. I saw this. Oscar showed it to me.

STU: This is not

GLENN: When they blew when you took the light bulb and you smashed it, we're talking about again good for the environment fluorescent light bulbs, the ones that now by 2012 you, unless you've done what I've done I'm not burying gold. I'm not burying food. I'm stocking up on incandescent light bulbs. You're going to have to have these fluorescent light bulbs because they're better for the environment. That's what we're talking about, fluorescent light bulbs. When they broke it and we went into break, Oscar, the cameraman, he said to me, he said, "Glenn, come here for a second." And Joe, our researcher and attorney, was standing there with him. And he said, Glenn, you won't believe this. They had some special filter on the lens or something that could show all of and for some reason or another you could only see it in this weird blue screen or reverse. I don't remember what it was. So we couldn't show it on television. But it was some sort of a filter that could show all of the pieces, everything that had shattered, everything that had come out of that light bulb. You could see it on the screen. And Stu, you were covered in it, cove red in it. It was like, the ground, if anybody saw the show last night, you saw just a few pieces and you spent all the time cleaning it up. It looked like it was a pile of snow. You couldn't see the ground in that area around the light bulb. It was amazing, amazing.

STU: Really creepy green CSI.

GLENN: Yeah, yeah. It was incredible.

STU: As we were doing some of the notes for that segment, I pulled out a couple of things we didn't get to on the air, that Maine has an acceptable mercury standard of 300 nanograms per cubic meter, okay? 300. In their tests they hit levels of 25,000, sometimes over this is a quote sometimes over 50,000 and possibly over 100,000 from the breakage of a single CFL. That's more than 300 times the acceptable standards. And they go on to say that the procedures, when they did all these cleaning procedures that I did last night, eight of them you saw how ridiculous. It seems so futile. Like they wouldn't even I had to use tape to pick up pieces of glass.

GLENN: If you saw the filter on the camera, you wouldn't pick it up with your hands, either.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: I mean, if you did you know, everybody just vacuums them up, just vacuums it up? That stuff is in you better throw your dust buster away.

STU: And they said literally if you get it on your clothes, don't wash them in the sink, don't put them in the washing machine. Throw them out. Literally says throw them out.

GLENN: If you saw you know what

STU: I've got to see these somehow.

GLENN: I have to break another one. I've got to take a picture of that picture. It was almost like an oscilloscope. You know what an oscilloscope is? It was almost like that. I mean, it was black and white. It was I don't know how to describe it, but it was incredible.

STU: This is and they said the State of Maine did a lot of studies on this and they said if you follow all the procedures that I did, all eight steps, it will produce visibly this is a quote visibly clean flooring surfaces for both wood and carpets but all types of flooring surfaces tested can retain mercury surfaces when visibly clean at levels more than 150 times acceptable. This has, quote, particular significance for children rolling around on the floor, babies crawling or nonmobile infants placed on the floor. So pick it up with tape; don't roll your baby infant around to pick up the pieces of glass. I guess that's but I mean, that's significant.

GLENN: Yeah.

STU: You are talking 150 to 300 times acceptable levels from one bulb?

GLENN: You know, can I tell you something? Years ago I broke a thermometer.

STU: Really?

GLENN: Yeah, broke a thermometer.

STU: Because that's even more serious, I guess.

GLENN: That's actual mercury.

STU: Mercury all over the floor.

GLENN: Yeah, but it all pools up. It's pretty cool to play with. Anyway, so cleaned it up and, you know, know it went into the wood floor because you had a little spot of you know, it just kind of discolored the floor. Oh, well.

STU: What are you going to do.

GLENN: Oh, well. If you told the state that that happened, oh, my gosh, you'd have to, you know, get rid of that floor, everything else. There's no way you could if I would have done that in a public place, there's no way. They would have quarantined that room, they would have taken up the floor. There's no way you could have done it. You know what? We all survive; let it go.

STU: Well, you think that now.

GLENN: I might I've either got mercury poisoning or I've got what George Soros had. Whew, he didn't look good.

So anyway, the great thing is if you look at the light bulb segment that we did, Stu had to go and drive to a recycling center to get rid of the light bulb and all of the stuff that he used to clean it up. He had to put it in a glass jar. Now, how good is a glass jar for recycling? What are they going to do? They're going to go in a landfill. They're going to crush it.

STU: Yeah, and one of the big things in reading this report was the way you dispose of it at the end, it's still, no matter what you do, it still lets off some mercury.

GLENN: And did you see that on the bulb, I checked, it had a caution I love the caution that it had on the bulb that you broke? Did you read those cautions?

STU: No.

GLENN: On the caution it says do not oh, I wish I had the exact phrase. Caution: Do not install something like where there is a direct line of water or something where it can be oh, so I shouldn't put this in my shower drain? Are we this stupid?

And then the other thing was it said underneath, made in China. These are made in China. Regular light bulbs are made here in Kentucky. Incandescent light bulbs are made here in the United States. So you're telling me that buying these things in China, putting them on a giant freighter ship, dodging pirates, you know those. They're feeding those slave children in China mercury: Here, have some more mercury in your soup, kids. You know that's going on. There's no standards over there. They put them on a train, they ship them to the sea yards, they then put them onto a cargo ship, ship it around the world to us and this is better? As I said last night, what is global warming? That's a total scam, isn't it? Is he bleeding from his eyes yet?

It's time for our April 29, 2019 edition of our Candidate Power Rankings. We get to add two new candidates, write about a bunch of people that have little to no chance of winning, and thank the heavens we are one day closer to the end of all of this.

In case you're new here, read our explainer about how all of this works:

The 2020 Democratic primary power rankings are an attempt to make sense out of the chaos of the largest field of candidates in global history.

Each candidate gets a unique score in at least thirty categories, measuring data like polling, prediction markets, fundraising, fundamentals, media coverage, and more. The result is a candidate score between 0-100. These numbers will change from week to week as the race changes.

The power rankings are less a prediction on who will win the nomination, and more a snapshot of the state of the race at any given time. However, early on, the model gives more weight to fundamentals and potentials, and later will begin to prioritize polling and realities on the ground.

These power rankings include only announced candidates. So, when you say "WAIT!! WHERE'S XXXXX????" Read the earlier sentence again.

If you're like me, when you read power rankings about sports, you've already skipped ahead to the list. So, here we go.

See previous editions here.

20. Wayne Messam: 13.4 (Last week: 18th / 13.4)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

A former staffer of Wayne Messam is accusing his wife of hoarding the campaign's money.

First, how does this guy have "former" staffers? He's been running for approximately twelve minutes.

Second, he finished dead last in the field in fundraising with $44,000 for the quarter. Perhaps hoarding whatever money the campaign has is not the worst idea.

His best shot at the nomination continues to be something out of the series "Designated Survivor."

Other headlines:

19. Marianne Williamson: 17.1 (Last week: 17th / 17.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Marianne Williamson would like you to pay for the sins of someone else's great, great, great grandparents. Lucky you!

Williamson is on the reparations train like most of the field, trying to separate herself from the pack by sheer monetary force.

How much of your cash does she want to spend? "Anything less than $100 billion is an insult." This is what I told the guy who showed up to buy my 1989 Ford Tempo. It didn't work then either.

Other headlines:

18. John Delaney: 19.7 (Last week: 15th / 20.3)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Good news: John Delaney brought in $12.1 million in the first quarter, enough for fifth in the entire Democratic field!

Bad news: 97% of the money came from his own bank account.

Other headlines:

17. Eric Swalwell: 20.2 (Last week: 16th / 20.2)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

The Eric Swalwell formula:

  • Identify news cycle
  • Identify typical left-wing reaction
  • Add steroids

Democrats said there was obstruction in the Mueller report. Swalwell said there “certainly" was collusion.

Democrats said surveillance of the Trump campaign was no big deal. Swalwell said there was no need to apologize even if it was.

Democrats said William Barr mishandled the release of the Mueller report. Swalwell said he must resign.

Democrats say they want gun restrictions. Swalwell wants them all melted down and the liquid metal to be poured on the heads of NRA members. (Probably.)

16. Seth Moulton: 20.6 (NEW)

Who is Seth Moulton?

No, I'm asking.

Moulton falls into the category of congressman looking to raise his profile and make his future fundraising easier— not someone who is actually competing for the presidency.

He tried to block Nancy Pelosi as speaker, so whatever help he could get from the establishment is as dry as Pelosi's eyes when the Botox holds them open for too long.

Moulton is a veteran, and his military service alone is enough to tell you that he's done more with his life than I'll ever do with mine. But it's hard to see the road to the White House for a complete unknown in a large field of knowns.

Don't take my word for it, instead read this depressing story that he's actually telling people on purpose:

"I said, you know, part of my job is take tough questions," Moulton told the gathered business and political leaders. "You can ask even really difficult questions. And there was still silence. And then finally, someone in the way back of the room raised her hand, and she said, 'Who are you?' "

Yeah. Who are you?

15. Tim Ryan: 21.6 (Last week: 14th / 20.7)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

When you're talking to less than sixteen people in Iowa one week after your launch, you don't have too much to be excited about.

Ryan did get an interview on CNN, where he also talked to less than sixteen people.

He discussed his passion for the Dave Matthews Band, solidifying a key constituency in the year 1995.

Other headlines:

14. Tulsi Gabbard: 25.2 (Last week: 14th / 25.9)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Tulsi Gabbard torched Kamala Harris in fundraising!!!!! (Among Indian-American donors.)

No word on who won the coveted handi-capable gender-neutral sodium-sensitive sub-demographic.

She received a mostly false rating for her attack on the Trump administration regarding its new policy on pork inspections, a topic not exactly leading the news cycle. Being from Hawaii, the state which leads the nation in Spam consumption, she was probably surprised when this didn't go mega viral.

Other headlines:

13. Andrew Yang: 27.2 (Last week: 12th / 27.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Yang has a few go-to lines when he's on the campaign trail, such as: "The opposite of Donald Trump is an Asian man who likes math." Another is apparently the Jeb-esque "Chant my name! Chant my name!"

Yang continues to be one of the more interesting candidates in this race, essentially running a remix of the "One Tough Nerd" formula that worked for Michigan Governor Rick Snyder.

I highly recommend listening to his interview with Ben Shapiro, where Yang earns respect as the only Democratic presidential candidate in modern history to actually show up to a challenging and in-depth interview with a knowledgeable conservative.

But hidden in the Shapiro interview is the nasty little secret of the Yang campaign. His policy prescriptions, while still very liberal, come off as far too sane for him to compete in this Stalin look-alike contest.

Other headlines:

12. Jay Inslee: 30.4 (Last week: 11th / 30.4)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

If you read the Inslee candidate profile, I said he was running a one-issue climate campaign. This week, he called for a climate change-only debate, and blamed Donald Trump for flooding in Iowa.

He also may sign the nation's first "human composting" legalization bill. He can start by composting his presidential campaign.

Other headlines:

11. John Hickenlooper: 32.2 (Last week: 10th / 32.0)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

John Hickenlooper was sick of being asked if he would put a woman on the ticket, in the 0.032% chance he actually won the nomination.

So he wondered why the female candidates weren't being asked if they would name a male VP if they won?

Seems like a logical question, but only someone who is high on tailpipe fumes would think it was okay to ask in a Democratic primary. Hickenlooper would be better served by just transitioning to a female and demanding other candidates are asked why they don't have a transgendered VP.

Other headlines:

10. Julian Castro: 35.7 (Last week: 9th / 36.2)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Lowering expectations is a useful strategy when your wife asks you to put together an Ikea end table, or when you've successfully convinced Charlize Theron to come home with you. But is it a successful campaign strategy?

Julian Castro is about to find out. He thinks the fact that everyone thinks he's crashing and burning on the campaign trail so far is an "advantage." Perhaps he can take the rest of the field by surprise on Super Tuesday when they finally realize he's actually running.

Other headlines:

9. Kirsten Gillibrand: 38.1 (Last week: 8th / 37.8)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Gillibrand wants you to know that the reason her campaign has been such a miserable failure so far, is because she called for a certain senator to step down. The problem might also be that another certain senator isn't a good presidential candidate.

She also spent the week arm wrestling, and dancing at a gay bar called Blazing Saddle. In this time of division, one thing we can all agree on: Blazing Saddle is a really solid name for a gay bar.

Other headlines:

8. Amy Klobuchar: 45.1 (Last week: 7th / 45.5)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Klobuchar is attempting a run in the moderate wing of the Democratic primary, which would be a better idea if such a wing existed.

She hasn't committed to impeaching Donald Trump and has actually voted to confirm over half of his judicial nominees. My guess is this will not be ignored by her primary opponents.

She also wants to resolve an ongoing TPS issue, which I assume means going by Peter Gibbons' desk every morning and making sure he got the memo about the new cover sheets.

Other headlines:

7. Elizabeth Warren: 45.3 (Last week: 6th / 46.0)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Elizabeth Warren is bad at everything she does while she's campaigning. I don't really even watch Game of Thrones, and the idea that Warren would write a story about how the show proves we need more powerful women makes me cringe.

Of course, more powerful people of all the 39,343 genders are welcome, but it's such a transparent attempt at jumping on the back of a pop-culture event to pander to female voters, it's sickening.

We can only hope that when she's watching Game of Thrones, she's gonna grab her a beer.

Other headlines:

6. Cory Booker: 54.9 (Last week: 5th / 55.5)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Booker is tied with Kamala Harris for the most missed Senate votes of the campaign so far. He gets criticized for this, but I think he should miss even more votes.

Booker is also pushing a national day off on Election Day—because the approximately six months of early voting allowed in every state just isn't enough.

Of course, making it easier to vote doesn't mean people are going to vote for Booker. So he's throwing trillions of dollars in bribes (my word, not his) to seal the deal.

Bookermania is in full effect, with 40 whole people showing up to his appearance in Nevada. Local press noted that the people were of "varying ages," an important distinction to most other crowds, which are entirely comprised of people with the same birthday.

Other headlines:

5. Robert Francis O’Rourke: 60.2 (Last week: 4th /62.6)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Kirsten Gillibrand gave less than 2% of her income to charity. The good news is that she gave about seven times as much as Beto O'Rourke. Robert Francis, or Bob Frank, also happens to be one of the wealthiest candidates in the race. His late seventies father-in-law has been estimated to be worth as much as $20 billion, though the number is more likely to be a paltry $500 million.

He's made millions from a family company investing in fossil fuels and pharmaceutical stocks, underpaid his taxes for multiple years, and is suing the government to lower property taxes on a family-owned shopping center.

He's also all but disappeared. It's a long race, and you don't win a nomination in April of the year before election day. If he's being frugal and figuring out what he believes, it might be a good move.

But it's notable that all the "pretty boy" hype that Bob Frank owned going into this race has been handed over to Mayor Pete. Perhaps Beto is spending his time working on curbing the sweating, the hand gestures, and the issues with jumping on counters like a feline.

Other headlines:

4. Pete Buttigieg: 62.9 (Last week: 3rd / 62.9)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

When we first put candidates in tiers earlier this year, we broke everyone into five categories from "Front Runners" to "Eh, no." In the middle is a category called "Maybe, if everything goes right," and that's where we put Pete Buttigieg.

Well, everything has gone right so far. But Mayor Pete will be interested to learn that the other 19 candidates in this race are not going to hand him this nomination. Eventually, they will start saying negative things about him (they've started the opposition research process already), and it will be interesting to see how Petey deals with the pressure. We've already seen how it has affected Beto in a similar situation.

The media has spoken endlessly about the sexual orientation of Buttigieg, but not every Democratic activist is impressed. Barney Frank thinks the main reason he's getting this amount of attention is because he is gay. And for some, being a gay man just means you're a man, which isn't good enough.

When you base your vote on a candidate's genitals, things can get confusing.

Other headlines:

3. Kamala Harris: 68.6 (Last week: 1st / 69.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

There are a couple of ways to view the Harris candidacy so far.

#1 - Harris launched with much fanfare and an adoring media. She has since lost her momentum. Mayor Pete and former Mayor Bernie have the hype, and Kamala is fading.

#2 - Harris is playing the long game. She showed she can make an impact with her launch, but realizes that a media "win" ten months before an important primary means nothing. She's working behind the scenes and cleaning up with donations, prominent supporters, and loads of celebrities to execute an Obama style onslaught.

I tend to be in category 2, but I admit that's somewhat speculative. Harris seems to be well positioned to make a serious run, locking up more than double the amount of big Clinton and Obama fundraisers than any other candidate.

One interesting policy development for Harris that may hurt her in the primary is her lack of utter disgust for the nation of Israel. There's basically one acceptable position in a Democratic primary when it comes to Israel, which is that it's a racist and terrorist state, existing only to torture innocent Palestinians.

Certainly no one is going to mistake Harris for Donald Trump, but a paragraph like this is poison to the modern Democratic primary voter:

"Her support for Israel is central to who she is," Harris' campaign communications director, Lily Adams, told McClatchy. "She is firm in her belief that Israel has a right to exist and defend itself, including against rocket attacks from Gaza."

Just portraying the rocket attacks as "attacks" is controversial these days for Democrats, and claiming they are responses to attacks indicates you think the Jeeeewwwwwwwws aren't the ones responsible for the start of every hostility. Heresy!

Someone get Kamala a copy of the 'Protocols of the Elders of Zion' before she blows her chance to run the free world.

2. Bernie Sanders: 69.2 (Last week: 2nd / 68.3)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

If Bernie Sanders hates millionaires as much as he claims, he must hate the mirror. As a millionaire, it might surprise some that he donated only 1% to charity. But it shouldn't.

It's entirely consistent with Sandersism to avoid giving to private charity. Why would you? Sanders believes the government does everything better than the private sector. He should be giving his money to the government.

Of course, he doesn't. He takes the tax breaks from the evil Trump tax plan he derides. He spends his money on fabulous vacation homes. He believes in socialism for thee, not for me.

Yes, this is enough to convince the Cardi B's of the world, all but guaranteeing a lock on the rapper-and-former-stripper-that-drugged-and-stole-from-her-prostitution-clients demographic. But can that lack of consistency hold up in front of general election voters?

If Bernie reads this and would like a path to credibility, clear out your bank account and send it here:

Gifts to the United States
U.S. Department of the Treasury
Funds Management Branch
P.O. Box 1328
Parkersburg, WV 26106-1328


Other headlines:

1. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr.: 78.8 (NEW)

Joe has run for president 113 times during his illustrious career, successfully capturing the presidency in approximately zero of his campaigns.

However, when the eternally woke Barack Obama had a chance to elevate a person of color, woman, or anything from the rainbow colored QUILTBAG, he instead chose the oldest, straightest, whitest guy he could find, and our man Robinette was the beneficiary.

Biden has been through a lot, much of it of his own making. Forget about his plagiarism and propensity to get a nostril full of each passing females' hair, his dealings while vice president in both Ukraine and China are a major general election vulnerability— not to mention a legal vulnerability for his children. But hey, win the presidency and you can pardon everyone, right?

His supposed appeal to rust belt voters makes him, on paper, a great candidate to take on Trump. The Clinton loss hinged on about 40,000 voters changing their mind from Hillary to Donald in a few states—the exact areas where victory could possibly be secured by someone named "Middle Class Joe" (as he alone calls himself.)

No one loves Joe Biden more than Joe Biden, and there's a relatively convincing case for his candidacy. But we must remember this unquestionable truth: Joe Biden is not good at running for president.

He's a gaffe machine that churns out mistake after mistake, hoping only to have his flubs excused by his unending charisma. But, will that work without the use of his legendary groping abilities? Only time, and a few dozen unnamed women, will tell.

Also, yes. Robinette is really his middle name.

If only Karl Marx were alive today to see his wackiest ideas being completely paraded around. He would be so proud. I can see him now: Sprawled out on his hammock from REI, fiddling around for the last vegan potato chip in the bag as he binge-watches Academy Awards on his 70-inch smart TV. In between glances at his iPhone X (he's got a massive Twitter following), he sips Pepsi. In his Patagonia t-shirt and NIKE tennis shoes, he writes a line or two about "oppression" and "the have-nots" as part of his job for Google.

His house is loaded with fresh products from all the woke companies. In the fridge, he's got Starbucks, he loves their soy milk. He's got Ben & Jerry's in the freezer. He tells everyone that, if he shaved, he'd use Gillette, on account of the way they stand up for the Have-Nots. But, really, Marx uses Dollar Shave Club because it's cheaper, a higher quality. Secretly, he loves Chic-Fil-A. He buys all his comic books off Amazon. The truth is, he never thought people would actually try to make the whole "communism" thing work.

RELATED: SOCIALISM: This is the most important special we have done

Companies have adopted a form of socialism that is sometimes called woke capitalism. They use their status as corporations to spread a socialist message and encourage people to do their part in social justice. The idea of companies in America using socialism at all is as confusing and ridiculous as a donkey in a prom dress: How did this happen? Is it a joke? Why is nobody bursting out in laughter? How far is this actually going to go? Does someone actually believe that they can take a donkey to prom?

Companies have adopted a form of socialism that is sometimes called woke capitalism.

On the micro level, Netflix has made some socialist moves: The "like/dislike" voting system was replaced after a Netflix-sponsored stand-up special by Amy Schumer received as tidal wave of thumb-downs. This summer, Netflix will take it a step further in the name of squashing dissent by disabling user comments and reviews. And of course most of us share a Netflix account with any number of people. Beyond that, they're as capitalist as the next mega-company.

Except for one area: propaganda. Netflix has started making movie-length advertisements for socialism. They call them "documentaries," but we know better than that. The most recent example is "Knock Down the House," which comes out tomorrow. The 86-minute-long commercial for socialism follows four "progressive Democrat" women who ran in the 2018 midterms, including our favorite socialist AOC.

Here's a snippet from the movie so good that you'll have to fight the urge to wave your USSR flag around the room:

This is what the mainstream media wants you to believe. They want you to be moved. They want the soundtrack to inspire you to go out and do something.

Just look at how the mainstream media treated the recent high-gloss "documentary" about Ilhan Omar, "Time for Ilhan." It received overwhelmingly bad ratings on IMDb and other user-review platforms, but got a whopping 93% on the media aggregator Rotten Tomatoes.

This is exactly what the media wants you to think of when you hear the word socialism. Change. Empowerment. Strength. Diversity. They spend so much energy trying to make socialism cool. They gloss right over the unbelievable death toll. BlazeTV's own Matt Kibbe made a great video on this exact topic.

Any notion of socialism in America is a luxury, made possible by capitalism. The woke companies aren't actually doing anything for socialism. If they're lucky, they might get a boost in sales, which is the only thing they want anyway.

We want to show you the truth. We want to tell you the stories you won't hear anywhere else, not on Netflix, not at some movie festival. We're going to tell you what mainstream media doesn't want you to know.

Look at how much history we've lost over the years. They changed it slowly. But they had to. Because textbooks were out. So people were watching textbooks. It was printed. You would bring the book home. Mom and dad might go through it and check it out. So you had to slowly do things.

Well, they're not anymore. There are no textbooks anymore. Now, you just change them overnight. And we are losing new history. History is being changed in realtime.

RELATED: 'Good Morning Texas' joins Glenn to get an inside look at Mercury Museum

You have to write down what actually is happening and keep a journal. Don't necessarily tell everybody. Just keep a journal for what is happening right now. At some point, our kids won't have any idea of the truth. They will not have any idea of what this country was, how it really happened. Who were the good guys. Who were the bad guys. Who did what.

As Michelle Obama said. Barack knows. We have to change our history. Well, that's exactly what's happening. But it's happening at a very rapid pace.

We have to preserve our history. It is being systematically erased.

I first said this fifteen years ago, people need clay plots. We have to preserve our history as people preserved histories in ancient days, with the dead see scrolls, by putting them in caves in a clay pot. We have to preserve our history. It is being systematically erased. And I don't mean just the history of the founding of our country. I mean the history that's happening right now.

And the history that's happening right now, you're a problem if you're a conservative or a Christian. You are now a problem on the left, if you disagree and fall out of line at all. This is becoming a fascistic party. And you know what a fascist is. It doesn't matter if you're a Democrat or a Republican or an independent. If you believe it's my way or the highway, if you believe that people don't have a right to their opinion or don't have a right to their own life — you could do be a fascist.

Christianity might seem pretty well-protected in the U.S., but that's not the case in many parts of the globe.

On Easter Sunday, suicide bombers made the news for killing 290 innocent Christians in Sri Lanka and injuring another 500. On Tuesday, ISIS claimed responsibility for the massacre. Of course, the Western world mourned this tragic loss of life on a holy day of worship, but we forget that this isn't an isolated incident. Indeed, Christians are discriminated at extreme levels worldwide, and it needs to be brought to light. And whenever we do highlight brutal persecutions such as the Easter bombings in Sri Lanka, we need to call them what they are — targeted attacks against Christians. Sadly, many of our politicians are deathly afraid to do so.

RELATED: Hey media, there is absolutely a war on Christians!

A 2018 Pew Research Center study found that Christians are harassed in 144 countries — the most of any other faith — slightly outnumbering Muslims for the top of the list. Additionally, Open Doors, a non-profit organization that works to serve persecuted Christians worldwide, found in their 2019 World Watch List that over 245 million Christians are seriously discriminated against for their religious beliefs. Sadly, this translates into 4,136 Christians killed and 2,625 either arrested, sentenced, imprisoned, or detained without trial over the year-long study period. And when it comes to churches, those in Sri Lanka were merely added to a long list of 1,266 Christian buildings attacked for their religion.

These breathtaking stats receive very little coverage in the Western world. And there seems to be a profound hesitation from politicians in discussing the issue of persecution against Christians. In the case of the Sri Lanka bombings, there's even a reluctance to use the word "Christian."

After the horrific Pittsburgh Synagogue and New Zealand Mosque shootings, Democrats rightfully acknowledged the disturbing trend of targeted attacks against Jews and Muslims. But some of these same politicians refer to the Sri Lanka bombings with careless ambiguity.

So why is it so hard for our leaders to acknowledge the persecutions Christians face?

Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, for instance, certainly did — calling the incursions "attacks on Easter worshippers." Understandably, the term confused and frustrated many Christians. Although, supporters of these politicians argued the term was appropriate since a recent Associated Press report used it, and it was later picked up by a variety of media outlets, including Fox News. However, as more Democrats like 2020 presidential candidate Julián Castro and Rep. Dan Kildee continued to use the phrase "Easter worshippers," it became clear that these politicians were going out of their way to avoid calling a spade a spade.

So why is it so hard for our leaders to acknowledge the persecutions Christians face? For starters, Christianity in democratic countries like the U.S. is seen differently than in devastated countries like Somalia. According to Pew Research, over 70% of Americans are Christian, with 66% of those Christians being white and 35% baby boomers. So while diverse Christians from all over the world are persecuted for their faith—in the U.S., Christians are a dominant religion full of old white people. This places Christians at the bottom of progressives' absurd intersectional totem poll, therefore leaving little sympathy for their cause. However, the differing experiences of Christians worldwide doesn't take away from the fact that they are unified in their beliefs.

By refusing to name the faith of the Sri Lankan martyrs, politicians are sending a message that they have very little, if no, concern about the growing amount of persecution against Christians worldwide.

Martyrs don't deserve to be known as "Easter worshippers." They should be known by the Christian faith they gave their lives for. Decent politicians need to call the tragedy in Sri Lanka what it is — a vicious attack on the Christian faith.

Patrick Hauf (@PatrickHauf) is a writer for Young Voices and Vice President of Lone Conservative. His work can be found in the Washington Examiner, Townhall, FEE, and more.