by Glenn Beck
GLENN: From high above Times Square, third most listened to show in all of America. Hello, you sick twisted freak. Imagine a world, imagine a world where a baby received a trust fund at birth. Oh, it might sound like a fairytale, my friend, but being born into money or at least $500 in a savings account could soon become a reality for all children born here in the United States of America. Lawmakers are considering a bill that would give each and every newborn American the goal of promoting savings that would later be used for education or perhaps a first home or maybe even early retirement. ASPIRE. America Saving For Personal Investment, Retirement and Education Act, ASPIRE. The government all of a sudden has decided, save, don't spend. Save, don't spend. Wow. The ASPIRE Act.
We did a quick search on the ASPIRE Act to find out how it works. We found Yahoo Finance tells us all. Wait until you see how Yahoo Finance says this. How is the program going to work? According to Yahoo Finance, the ASPIRE Act would give each child born in the United States a $500 savings account. Pat, what would your kids do with $500?
PAT: Man, I well
GLENN: You can buy some earrings.
GLENN: You can buy some earrings. That's what Michelle Obama said, you could buy some earrings.
STU: Not two pairs of earrings.
STU: Maybe one and a third pair of earrings.
GLENN: That's unbelievable. That's great.
PAT: You could fill up your gas tank like twice.
GLENN: Hang on just a second. They could use that money, this according to, you know, all the things you can do at Yahoo Finance, you could use that money to pay for education, a first home.
PAT: What education could you pay for for $500? That's got to be a good school.
GLENN: It's what the money is going to grow into.
PAT: Oh. Oh, okay.
GLENN: And you don't just use that $500. When you have $500, when you're a baby and the government puts $500 in a savings account, you immediately, as a baby, start putting money into that savings account
PAT: To help it grow.
GLENN: To help it grow.
PAT: Well, savings are a right now, I guess, right? If every American is going to start with a savings account, savings must be a right.
GLENN: So not only will you not only are your children going to get $500 in every savings account when they're born but also low income children would receive more funding.
PAT: Wow. How much more?
GLENN: Don't know, but more.
STU: So every baby will get $500 except for the babies that get more than $500.
GLENN: What is the last line, what is the last line in Animal Farm? All animals are equal, just some animals are more equal than others? Would it really help people save more money is the question. $500 isn't much. Well, Reid Cramer, director of asset building program at the New America Foundation says the purpose of the accounts is to get people invested in their future. Hmmm. See, I wasn't thinking about the future. I've never been invested in the future. Have you, Pat?
GLENN: I just live for today.
PAT: Yeah. That's why, just every dollar I get in my check every month, I just spend it. I spend it all that day.
STU: I go to a check cashing store so they can take like 20% and then I can spend all of it before I even get the check.
GLENN: Right. Can I tell you something?
PAT: That's great.
GLENN: I spend it on hookers and blow.
PAT: That's great. That's great.
GLENN: And I usually, I mean, I just have an account running.
GLENN: And I'm just like, hey, I'll you know, it's kind of like Wimpy from Popeye, I'll pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.
STU: I'll pay you Tuesday for that rock today?
PAT: You must either have a lot of hookers or a lot of blow.
STU: Probably both.
PAT: Well, because you are spending all your money on it. That's a lot. That's a lot, just to get rid of it.
GLENN: You don't know. The hookers, the hookers now, what they are charging is ridiculous.
PAT: Is it?
STU: Well, remember
GLENN: Because I'm sure remember they are about to have union dues.
PAT: Oh, boy.
GLENN: And taxes on that money.
STU: And cocaine is imported and the dollar is weak.
GLENN: Oh, my gosh.
PAT: True, true.
GLENN: Anyway, let's not get hung up on hookers and blow. Back to ASPIRE. Indeed University of Michigan professor Michael Sherraden suggests starting individual savings accounts for lower income people can lead them to feel more confident about their future.
STU: Oh. So this is a government confidence program.
GLENN: It is.
STU: Well, that's what the government's here for is to give you
GLENN: Give you confidence.
STU: That's exactly why they were created.
GLENN: You know, I believe that's the same kind of rhetoric that we got when we were told give everybody on the team a trophy. It will give your kids more confidence. And we've seen how much that's working out so well, isn't it? Recipients of such accounts also report feeling that they have greater control over their lives.
STU: Wait, that's beneficial feelings?
STU: Confidence and feelings?
PAT: Confidence and feelings.
GLENN: Yeah. Further studies show that having owning assets is associated with great empowerment.
PAT: So you get confidence, you get feelings and you get empowerment.
PAT: This is a great program.
GLENN: No, the studies show that owning assets gives you empowerment.
GLENN: Being given 500 bucks, I don't know what that does. I don't know is that owning assets or is that just being given $500? See, because sometimes when you own assets, sometimes this is crazy, this is just how crazy and stupid I think in my world, okay? Owning assets come from accomplishing something. (Laughing)
STU: Can you imagine, can you imagine.
GLENN: Oh, man. That's so stupid. But further studies show that having owned assets is associated with greater empowerment and civic participation.
GLENN: Ooh. Also increased income and positive educational outcomes.
STU: Well, increased income, I guess you do have more income if the government is giving you more income. I would suppose that that is accurate. But I would think that that has something to do with earning something. Like when you earn it, you are going to feel more empowered to earn more in the future.
PAT: You're getting kooky now.
STU: I'm only kidding. I'm only kidding. I had you guys. I had you guys.
GLENN: I was trying to take you serious and I was like, you racist hate monger.
PAT: You had me.
GLENN: Oh, man. I was about to wrap you up and throw you in a camp. Anyway, why not just give the money to low income people who really need it?
STU: Why not?
GLENN: That's the question.
STU: That's one question.
GLENN: That is one question. Why not just give the money to low income people who really need it?
PAT: Why don't we just take money from rich people and just give it to poor people? Why don't we do that?
STU: Why give it to everyone? The rich people don't deserve it.
GLENN: The rich people don't need it.
PAT: They don't need it. They got plenty.
GLENN: And you know what? Let me tell you something. They may have deserved it at one time but you know that they are not making it ethically or, you know, you know that they've done things to people or the environment.
PAT: You can't get rich without hurting
GLENN: No, without screwing people.
PAT: You can't, no.
GLENN: The environment or animals.
STU: Right. And they might not be spending it for the benefit of the community, either. That's another problem.
GLENN: You know what it is thank you, Teddy Roosevelt.
GLENN: You know another thing? You can't get rich without taking things that don't belong to you from other lands. Sure, you go in and you might buy something, you know, like, you know, assets from some other, you know, country. But that's just really you taking it. Things that don't belong to you from other lands.
PAT: And then you have too much stuff. You just, you've accumulated stuff.
GLENN: Have you seen, have you seen the History of Stuff, too, from Berkeley, California?
PAT: Yes. It opened my eyes, Glenn.
GLENN: Thank you.
PAT: It opened my eyes.
GLENN: That is so good.
PAT: I wasn't aware that we have so much stuff, and we don't need it. Third world nation.
GLENN: Yeah, from people who have nothing.
PAT: The Africans have nothing because we took it all from them.
GLENN: Yeah, okay.
STU: Exploiting. Exploiting their resources.
GLENN: So anyway, entitlement programs that benefit everyone such as Social Security, Medicare tend to enjoy more widespread support and therefore they last longer.
STU: Oh, that's a perfect reason to expand it to everyone.
GLENN: Yeah, yeah. Because that way people aren't pissed off.
STU: Right. You can bribe them into submission.
STU: That's fantastic, wow.
GLENN: Yes. If we can just train people just to line up and give their stuff and then rely on us to be able to give them what we say they deserve.
STU: Oh, yeah, this is
PAT: You know what would be easier, rather than training them, just force them.
GLENN: You know what? Can I tell you something?
PAT: Just laying people up and point a gun at them and tell them they are doing it and then it's done.
GLENN: Can I tell you something?
STU: Much easier.
GLENN: If I happen to be in the government and I happen to have a gun and I mean, I wouldn't shoot people. The gun would shoot people.
PAT: Well, of course.
GLENN: You know what I mean? I wouldn't be responsible for it.
GLENN: They just go off. They're dangerous things.
PAT: Happens every day.
STU: Every day.
PAT: Every day.
GLENN: And if I just happen to be in the government and I said, hey, we've got to silence people and I just start shooting them in the if my gun just starts shooting them in the head
STU: They will be out of work.
GLENN: What can I do?
PAT: You are not responsible.
GLENN: I've been saying we should get rid of guns! They're dangerous!
PAT: Well, you haven't, but you just did there. So that's on the record now.
GLENN: You know what we should do? If I went, if I went to people's houses and took their guns from them and then those guns didn't have a child protection lock or anything on them and they accidentally went off and executed those people that had the guns, how much could I prove my point how dangerous guns are?
PAT: I mean, what does it take? What does it take for stupid people to understand?
GLENN: It's going to take I'll tell you. It's going to take a bullet in the head.
PAT: Yeah, for about 20% of the population I figure.
GLENN: I think that was Marx.
PAT: Yeah, 20%.
GLENN: Marx said got a guy you have to eliminate about 20% of the population to get that.
PAT: Well, they are too stupid.
STU: They are.
PAT: They are too stupid.
GLENN: They are. If we could just get more deep, deep thinkers like 17 year olds.
GLENN: Then we'd be set. Because they have the life experience. Look, the older people, they're coming. Who was it that said it was Al Gore. They're coming to the table with old ideas that
PAT: Prejudices, preconceived conditions.
GLENN: That you instinctively as a 14 year old know is not right. But your parents and these older people, they've just got too many preconceived notions. And so it's up to you, the 14 year old, to be able to teach your parents.
Anyway, the purpose of these accounts, ASPIRE, is to get people invested in their future. Indeed pioneering research has already shown that you'll have greater empowerment. And the important thing is that everybody gets an account. This is according to the guy who's running the New America Foundation. He says it's open automatically so families don't even need to take much action. It will still be a progressive program, because the ASPIRE Act is currently written with poorer families receiving additional funding.
STU: You can ASPIRE to have additional funding. That's fantastic.
GLENN: So what are some of the other questions that people might have?
STU: There's probably others.
GLENN: Like don't we already have a lot of policies in place that encourage savings? Yes, but they tend to mainly help people with higher incomes.
STU: Oh, I hate those people!
GLENN: People who have earned the money to then be able to save. I hate those people.
GLENN: Hasn't this been tried before?
STU: I hope so.
GLENN: Yes, it has.
GLENN: In Great Britain. Which, by the way, have you seen the economy of Great Britain?
STU: It's going well, going really well.
GLENN: Social Security so fantastic.
STU: Soaring through the skies.
GLENN: Since September 2002 children born in the United Kingdom have received a $500 savings account. Just as our ASPIRE Act would provide in the United States. Recipients can withdraw the money after the age of 18. Unlike in the proposed U.S. version. There are no restrictions on how they can spend the money. Well, most of the accounts go up in value. So they are now this is in the U.K. They go up in value
STU: Oh, my God.
GLENN: So now some of these $500 savings accounts
PAT: Are worth more?
STU: Oh, my God, not worth more than $500.
STU: Don't even say it. It's too good to be true.
GLENN: They are worth in some cases as much
STU: Wait, no, no.
PAT: Wait. As much as?
STU: Not more than $500.
GLENN: This is if they are invested in a diversified portfolio. They are worth as much as $600.
PAT: Get out of here!
STU: Oh, no! Wow.
GLENN: Now, could this the next question you're asking is could this reality happen here? Could it actually happen sometime soon?
PAT: Could it? Could it?
GLENN: In the United States? I'm saying yes.
PAT: Could it? You are saying yes?
STU: Please say yes.
GLENN: Lawmakers expect to reintroduce the ASPIRE Act before the end of the year, and it already enjoys bipartisan support.
STU: Bipartisan support, oh, that's great!
STU: That's great.
GLENN: The Republicans, the Republicans are also for it.
PAT: How fantastic, wow. So inclusive now.
GLENN: So glad that I can carry water for those guys, huh? Yeah.
GLENN: Anyway, well, that's what they say in the press anyway.
PAT: Gosh, that's good, right?
GLENN: The main challenge for supporters will most likely be over how to justify the cost at a time of great budget deficits.
PAT: No, don't even worry about that.
GLENN: And competing demand for federal dollars. Critics will argue
STU: Oh, boy.
PAT: Here comes the critics.
STU: Always, always arguing.
PAT: Don't even start.
GLENN: They argue that the program will simply create another costly entitlement program.
PAT: You know why?
GLENN: How could you possibly say that?
PAT: You know why?
GLENN: You are entitled to $500 at birth!
PAT: Of course you are. And they don't know about the confidence building. They don't know this could build people's confidence.
STU: Well, what about the empowerment?
PAT: And the empowerment. Thank you, Stu.
GLENN: Let's just cut that off at the pass. How would the government pay for this program?
PAT: How would they?
GLENN: Well, over the first decade of its life
PAT: Just go into debt, right? We just monetize our debt. We just give it to
STU: They would never do that.
PAT: That's silly. All right.
GLENN: No. The program will cost about $37.5 billion.
PAT: That's not bad.
STU: Sounds great.
GLENN: About $3.25 billion per year. And they are arguing now that because the money, because because the money would be invested through savings accounts, it will spur economic growth.
STU: Oh, my God!
PAT: So it pays for itself just like the healthcare system!
STU: Oh, that's fantastic.
PAT: Just like healthcare.
GLENN: You know what? I don't know why I've been working so hard. You know what I mean? Why I didn't
PAT: If you just sat around, you would pay for yourself after a while.
GLENN: How is it this magic money formula only works in Washington? I need
PAT: I'm going to tell Jackie, don't worry about it; we're moving to New Zealand and
PAT: Well, how will we start
GLENN: No, New Zealand, no.
PAT: It will pay for itself.
GLENN: Forget New Zealand. We've got to move right into the money capital of the universe, Washington, D.C. You know there are black holes that just suck everything in and crush it to death? This is a white hole. This is just, things are shooting out of Washington D.C.! It's a magical, magical place.
PAT: So it's the only place where programs like this would pay for itself?
GLENN: Can I tell you something? May I?
PAT: You may.
GLENN: Where is the one place that the laws of physics break down in the universe? Where? Black holes.
GLENN: So we know that the laws of physics can indeed break down. They also break down in Washington, D.C. The laws of physics break down and magic comes spilling out in the form of dollar bills.
GLENN: It's fantastic.
STU: Happiest place on Earth.
GLENN: Why how many more shows do we have to do before we just surrender and say, my gosh, I am on the I'm looking for the golden ticket to be able to get in and see the oompa loompas that are just making magic money in Washington, D.C. It's fantastic. It's fantasmagoric really, wouldn't you say?