From Forbes scariest people of 2009. Click here to read the article and print out your Glenn Beck mask...
GLENN: So it's always a pleasure turning on my computer in the morning and seeing all the things that have been written about me and this time drawn about me.
PAT: And I'll tell you that is not a flattering drawing of you, either.
GLENN: You don't think so?
STU: You are not that portly. I would actually say you are thinner in real life than that picture.
STU: Which is not something I say normally.
GLENN: No, it's not.
PAT: No, it really isn't. It really isn't.
GLENN: Forget the ghosts and goblins. Why not dress up as someone truly scary this year. Our annual collection of Halloween masks highlights some of the year's most frightening faces. This is from Forbes. And the 100 or the top ten scariest people of 2009, I'm number one.
PAT: Wow. Who's number two?
GLENN: Number two is Rod Blagojevich.
PAT: You are scarier than Rod Blagojevich?
GLENN: Apparently, yeah. We have Steve Forbes on?
GLENN: Steve? How are you?
FORBES: Well, better than you.
GLENN: Forbes is making me the number one scariest man in America?
FORBES: Well, hey, you know, people always want to be at the top of our list. We just happened to pick the wrong list.
GLENN: Not this one. I mean, isn't it am I spreading too many free market principles?
FORBES: It was a mis it was a miscommunication. We were going to put you on the most admired, most beloved, most reasonable, most enlightened list.
GLENN: Right, right.
FORBES: But we figured if we did that, it would yeah, we wanted to put a mask on you so you wouldn't get killed by the liberals.
GLENN: I mean, here's the competition: Rod Blagojevich, Bernie Madoff, Michael Jackson, David Letterman, Michael Moore, Roman Polanski. You've got a rapist who is nine slots lower than I am.
PAT: That's not good.
GLENN: Not good.
PAT: That seems bad.
GLENN: That's not good. That's not good.
FORBES: Well, as they say, people love to be on our list.
FORBES: We just happen, we got you on the wrong list.
GLENN: Wrong list.
FORBES: We normally would put you on the 400 list but we respect your privacy.
GLENN: That's right. So Steve, let me ask you real quick. We were talk
FORBES: By the way, this does show, even though I make you look like, you know, a true liberal, my conservatism, it shows we believe in diversity here.
GLENN: Yes, it does.
FORBES: The universe still has its job.
GLENN: Yes, it does. We were just talking about I've only got two minutes with you. We were just talking about George Soros. He is starting yet another he is going to dump another $50 million into a new antifree market think tank. Steve, help me out with the thinking. Do you know George?
FORBES: I've met him.
FORBES: But we're not friends.
GLENN: Help me I can imagine. Help me out with the thinking of people who become billionaires, make $9 billion last year in his hedge fund and yet he wants to close the door on everybody else. How does this work?
FORBES: Well, it's typical human nature. Once you've arrived, you want not you yourself but once the
GLENN: Well, I'm on the number one in Forbes, I'm on that list.
FORBES: Well, that's to keep the IRS away. You know, we want to keep the liberals away.
FORBES: But, and in terms of people like George Soros, it gets to one of the phenomenons and that is why do rich people hate capitalism. And they have this misconception that capitalism is about greed where it's about serving the needs and wants of others and a lot of these people feel once they make it, they feel guilty about it and they want to show, oh, no, we're human, we're liberal, we're kind, we don't believe in this dog eat dog blah, blah blah which is a caricature as we know anyway and so they turn against it. And so Soros is not alone in this. Many people who make a turn against it. And even the phrases that we use. For example, people say, well, when you make it, you should give back. Well, you should give.
GLENN: It shouldn't be taken.
FORBES: But give back sounds like you took something that didn't belong to you.
GLENN: Steve Forbes, thanks.