South Park hits Glenn



People just can't seem to get enough Glenn lately. Stewart, Colbert, SNL, Playboy and now South Park has spent time making fun of Glenn. In this episode of South Park, Eric Cartman takes on the role of Glenn Beck.

GLENN: I am amazed. I am absolutely amazed at this new effort to again I think their approach is now, Stu, that I'm just a conspiracy freak? Is that do you think that's the is that the new approach now to discredit me?

STU: If you remember the Republican plan for energy, it was an "All of the above" strategy.

GLENN: Okay.

STU: And this is what has been adopted by the left at this point, is throw anything that could possibly stick about any figure that they've seen in the media or on the right in the last 50 years and accuse you of it. That's essentially the plan at this point.

GLENN: It's really amazing. I just want to go through do we have the audio, Pat, of different things?

PAT: Working on it.

GLENN: In the last week there were I think there was a line about me in the opening monologue of Saturday Night Live.

STU: You appeared on Saturday Night Live in the opening.

GLENN: No, no, that was in the opening. But I think I was also in the monologue. I think the opening sketch, I appeared in it.

STU: You appeared in the opening sketch. I Taylor Swift was the host, by the way.

GLENN: Okay.

STU: And I do not believe that she mentioned you in that. She mentioned you

GLENN: Later?

STU: You were mentioned in the weekend update section as well.

GLENN: What did they I didn't even see that. What did they say?

STU: They said something about your appendix. It was your appendix, again the joke that has apparently been done by every comedian since you had an appendix problem which was your internal organs were attempting to leave your body.

GLENN: Right. Yeah. Okay. So we had Saturday Night Live. The night before that there was 10 minutes on Jon Stewart, and it was very funny. I mean, but you're making fun of me.

STU: It's fertile ground, yeah.

GLENN: I mean, you owe me royalties. I mean, all of these jokes I made about myself first.

STU: Oh, this is the foundation this program was built on was calling Glenn

GLENN: I mean, making fun of Glenn since 1964.

STU: Yeah, that really is, your whole career is making fun of yourself.

GLENN: You don't have it, Pat? Don't worry about it.

PAT: Still working.

GLENN: So then last night apparently and I find this hard to believe. Like the majority of the episode?

STU: Oh, yeah.

GLENN: Was about me.

STU: Yeah. The vast majority, yes.

GLENN: Set this up. This is South Park.

STU: Yes. South Park, Eric Cartman, the fattest member of the children. Just thought I'd point that out, represents you as he gets the job of the school announcement guy and where she's supposed to say stuff like what's going on for lunch or, you know, what meeting is happening in the musical.

GLENN: All right.

STU: He expands on that role quite a bit and he accuses the school president of many things.

GLENN: Okay. So here you go. And you'll see the rapid progression here. Now, what happens happening besides this? Are they making comments about me outside of this? Is it only these three pieces that are

STU: No, this is can't find the whole episode.

GLENN: Yeah, yeah.

STU: I mean, the whole thing is basically you know, and this is Cartman's character on this show is always kind of the loud mouth making accusations at everybody. You know, that's sort of his Schick.

GLENN: Right.

STU: He's got your hair in the episode which is sort of the gray on the side, not gray on the top.

GLENN: That's funny.

STU: Some other mysterious color on the top.

PAT: They use the logo.

STU: They use the logo. They go through, you'll hear kind of the music that sounds like the Glenn Beck TV open in which they show the same imagery, they have the same logo except it says EC instead of GB. You know, and these guys, again, these guys skewer everybody and they are always very good at it.

GLENN: You know what's amazing to me is I'm a libertarian.

STU: And they are, too.

GLENN: And they are, too.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: And when you're a libertarian, there ain't anybody coming to your defense.

STU: No.

GLENN: There's no one coming to your defense.

STU: Not even libertarians. Because they are frustrated at everything, even themselves.

GLENN: Libertarians, I mean, Penn Jillette. Penn Jillette, I feel so bad for Penn Jillette. What Penn Jillette has gone through with some of his friends and one of his idols, Tommy Smothers, I mean, honestly I don't know if you've seen this video with Penn Jillette, but it broke my heart. Penn Jillette and I don't agree on a lot of stuff. We're libertarians. We live with it. He doesn't agree on things, I don't agree on things, but I'm not telling him how to live his life and he's not going to tell me how to live my life. And I think we've had a good relationship.

STU: Sure.

GLENN: You know, it's been tense at times because we're both extraordinarily frank. But neither of us are trying to jam our point of view on everybody else.

STU: He is on the show, I mean dozens of times.

GLENN: Dozens of times.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: He has gotten so much flack from his friends because, you know, they buy into, "Oh, he's a fascist." I don't care what you do with your life. Honor the Constitution. Limited government. Maximum amount of freedom. Throw them all out. Get people who understand the founding fathers. Libertarians are eating each other alive. And it doesn't make any sense. It doesn't make any sense. But see, there's no, there's no structure to it. And I'm fine with that. But that's why libertarians lose is because there's no, there's no system. There's no system. And so there's no one to defend. And so the, both parties, when they start to grind down on you, you have the entire system against you, and it's quite amazing. It's quite amazing.

So here's Cartman. Now, this is South Park, and I'm flattered. But remember these guys are libertarians. Here's South Park.

VOICE: Good morning, South Park Elementary. These are the morning announcements, and I am Eric Cartman. All forms for the school book drive must be handed in to Mr. Davis in the library by the end of the school day today. Doesn't seem like they gave us a lot of notice on that. Oh, well. For lunch today the cafeteria will be serving a selection of cold sandwiches, cold sandwiches. Oh, well, thank you so much. Remember when we used to be served hot food? I mean, what has happened to our school? This school is transforming into something very bad. And why? Because we have leadership that doesn't care. I'm talking, of course, about our student body president, Wendy Testaburger. Ever since Wendy was elected president, this student has started a rapid decline with some socialist regime where students no longer have a voice. The music room will be closed off today due to painting. All band choir will meet in the gymnasium instead. Oh, so now the school doesn't vat money to paint the music room. How old and outdated is our playground equipment? What other school has a 15 year old merry go round on it? Our school is turning this whole place into communist Russia. It's not a coincidence that once Wendy took office, this school started coming apart at the seams. Your teachers don't want to tell you but they're scared and they should be because the very fabric of this elementary school is tearing from all corners. Oh, jeez. But hey, I'm just a normal kid like you, and I ask questions. And because I ask questions, I come under scrutiny. Is Wendy using your lunch money to buy heroin? Probably not. But how can we know? I don't want my lunch money going to drugs. Who's taking these drugs? What would be the point? I'm asking questions.

STU: Is that the end of Clip 1 there, Sarah?

PAT: Man. Man.

STU: Now, what's in your critique does not say that ever since Wendy Testaburger took over the presidency, the school has gone downhill. You would say it goes much, much before Wendy Testaburger.

PAT: Our last student body president.

GLENN: Yeah. He was driving nails into that coffin quickly and then we got this guy and he's like, you know what? Let's just use a nail gun... (making nail gun noises).

STU: So as you can imagine, this is the second set of announcements from Cartman as Glenn Beck.

CARTMAN: Well, good morning, South Park Elementary. These are the morning announcements. I have a question. What does Wendy Testaburger actually do? She is supposed to be the president, right? What is her agenda? She's lying to everyone, or is she? Let's ask these questions. I want to talk briefly about the state of our school's economy. The bake sale last week was a complete failure. And besides that, who actually voted for Wendy Testaburger? I know I didn't. And everyone who did is now scratching their heads and going, whoops, guess I shouldn't have done that. I'm not in the student council. I'm just a normal kid like all of you. And like you, I want to know what has happened to my school. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America. Our United States, not the one Wendy Testaburger would have, a socialist dung ho, a socialist dung ho.

STU: That's number 2.

GLENN: Does Cartman live in the end?

STU: Yeah, that's the Kenny's the one that's always dying. As far as I know, shockingly you made it through the episode. Which is nice. Now, the last one here, of course, gets worse and worse and develops into

GLENN: Now, this is the one, this is the one with the graphics that look like the show graphics and the logo?

STU: You'll hear the music and, you know, picture all the, all the same imagery that happens.

GLENN: Blackboard?

STU: Yeah, blackboard comes out. You'll hear him drawing on the blackboard. This is clip number 3.

CARTMAN: Good morning, students. These are the morning announcements. If you'll direct your attention to the new video monitors at the head of your class, you will see that the announcements are now being done in video. Oh, god, no!

GLENN: This is the Glenn Beck logo coming in.

CARTMAN: Lunch today is going to be pizza, again. Friends, our school is dying and you know it. You feel it. You are like me. You want to change it. But oh, no, Wendy Testaburger's not going to let that happen. This is not the school we grew up in, and I don't know if we can get it back. Just take a look at exactly what our school president wants. You know, what is she trying to achieve? Let's just take a look at these key words here. Wendy's made it clear she wants our school to be a more integrated leftist and liberal place. But you see, when that happens, what we get is a socialist, modern utopian reformed farce of a school. So when you look closely, it becomes very obvious what Wendy wants: K i l l s m u r f s. Our school president wants to kill Smurfs. I don't know if we're turning into a Smurf hating school or what we're turning into. But unless you ask why, we're going to transform into something.

STU: There you go. So yeah. This is where it kind of meshed in with the James Cameron movie Avatar that's coming out which they are basically accusing of spending $500 million on a movie about killing Smurfs. So it kind of all merged together as these episodes do. But I mean, you know, to me it's nothing but a compliment. I mean

GLENN: Oh, yeah. No, no, no.

STU: Everyone's got their role in society and South Park's is to make fun of everyone that's around.

GLENN: And everybody. It was Tom Cruise and Scientology and Jesus is know was a full episode.

STU: It's on everything, global warming.

GLENN: Global warming. So it is a compliment. I have to watch it, although it is I have to tell you, it would be nice to have somebody, somebody that wasn't that just had the facts right.

 

There is no transparency when it comes to the Biden administration, and Texas Republican Sen. Ted Cruz's recent exchange with the FBI’s Jill Sanborn is just another example. When questioned about alleged involvement the FBI had on January 6, 2021, Sanborn refused to answer almost every single time.

Do our government officials still work for us? Take a look at the latest headlines: The DOJ and U.S. Army are preparing for possible conflicts with "domestic terrorists," Biden's education secretary allegedly requested the NSBA letter that suggested treating upset parents like domestic terrorists, and President Biden said if you're not with him on the Democrats' voting bills, then you're with the Confederacy. Meanwhile, the FBI won't tell Congress whether it was involved in the the Jan. 6 Capitol riot and the corporate media insists that there's nothing to see here, especially concerning Ray Epps.

The American people are concerned, and it’s "extraordinarily disturbing" how far the federal government goes to avoid answering our questions, Glenn Beck said on the radio program. There's a very odd growing trend here: Our leaders, including the unelected ones, no longer answer to the people. This must stop now.

"The question that I have is, where is the transparency? And is anyone going to be held accountable? They are not afraid of our senators. They are not afraid of Congress," he stated. "This has got to stop. They have got to answer to the law. This is an oversight committee. Who is in charge, the FBI or the people? Once the people are not in charge and are not allowed to see the secret documents, we are toast. Toast!"

Watch the video clip below to hear for more from Glenn:

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To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

Have you ever wondered why so many insane things are happening simultaneously RIGHT NOW? Big corporations are going woke. The stock market got red-hot during a FORCED recession. Stores like Walmart and Target were allowed to stay open during the lockdown, but mom-and-pop stores on Main Street had to close, some of them forever.

On Wednesday's "GlennTV" special, Glenn Beck explains it all in this sneak-peek episode — a primer to his new book and the upcoming explosive, in-depth special: “The Great Reset: Joe Biden & the Rise of 21st-Century Fascism.” Co-author Justin Haskins joins along with Glenn’s head writer and researcher, Jason Buttrill, to answer audience questions about a topic that the media has tried to censor and “fact-check.” You will be equipped with everything you need to know about what the global elites of the world have planned for the transformation of society and YOUR life.

Watch the full episode of "Glenn TV" below:


Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

After new information came out that suggests Dr. Anthony Fauci intimidated and bribed scientists into dismissing the COVID-19 lab-leak theory, Sen. Rand Paul and Fauci got into a heated debate in a Senate hearing. But instead of providing answers, Fauci accused Sen. Paul of endangering him.

Sen. Paul joined "The Glenn Beck Program" Wednesday with his response and explained why he believes "people live in fear of what [Fauci] will do to them."

"It's all about money. If you cross Tony Fauci, you don't get your money. He controls the purse strings for the entire country, the entire university system. And he's been doing it for forty years," Sen. Paul began.

"It's consistent with his arrogance, this level of arrogance that he's developed. He said several weeks ago, that he is science and any attack on him is an attack on science. Yesterday, he said anybody who opposes him is encouraging death threats," he added.

"Look, I've been on the receiving end of semi-automatic gunfire. I was 20 yards away from Steve Scalise when he almost died. I was 10 feet away from a staffer that was shot. And, you know what? The guy doing the shooting was a Bernie Sanders supporter. But not one of us, not one of the Republicans on the ball field, said, 'Oh, it was Bernie Sanders' fault.' But that's the juvenile level of personal attack that Fauci is now stooping to. He is saying that the personal threats he gets are actually the fault of his critics."

Sen. Paul continued, "But the thing is, [Fauci] needs to answer the question. Everything he did in the committee yesterday was misdirection so he didn't have to answer the question. The question was, why did he smear three scientists from Stanford, Oxford, and Harvard? Why did he smear them as fringe epidemiologists? And why did he conspire against Francis Collins to take them down in a very public way? He wouldn't answer the question."

Watch the video clip below to hear more of Glenn's conversation with Sen. Rand Paul:


Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

Over the past year, an increasing number of voices on the left have pushed for radical changes to our way of life, from reforming capitalism to enacting strict vaccine mandates. But are the American people behind these changes? A recent poll from the Heartland Institute and Rasmussen sought to find out, and the results are startling. The three-part poll asked likely voters for their thoughts on the Great Reset (half said they don't know what that is), COVID-19 authoritarianism, and whether they prefer former President Donald Trump or President Joe Biden.

The Heartland Institute's Justin Haskins joined Glenn Beck on the radio program to break down the results of this exclusive poll, including the disturbing revelation that roughly half of Democrats polled supported shockingly authoritarian COVID-19 policies. For example, nearly half of Democrats polled said they think federal or state governments should require unvaccinated people to live in "designated areas or facilitates," or essentially camps. Nearly half of Democrats supported a proposal "to fine or imprison individuals" just for questioning the efficacy of the existing COVID-19 vaccines on social media, television, radio, or in online or digital publications. And, when asked if people who refuse to get vaccinated should lose custody of their children, 20% of Democrats answered "yes."

But the poll showed some good news, too. Watch the video clip below for more details:


Glenn and Justin’s new book, ‘The Great Reset: Joe Biden And The Rise Of 21st Century Fascism’ is available to order now.

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.