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GLENN: Let me just play a little bit of audio for you and see if you can tell
PRESIDENT OBAMA: Long before America was even an idea, this land of plenty was
home to many peoples. To British and French, to Dutch and Spanish, to Mexican...
PRESIDENT OBAMA: To countless Indian tribes. We all shared the same land. We
didn't always get along, but over the centuries what eventually bound us
together, what made us all Americans was not a matter of blood, it wasn't a
matter of birth. It was faith and fidelity to the shared values that we all hold
so dear. We hold these truths to be self evident that all men are created equal,
endowed with certain inalienable rights, life and liberty and the pursuit of
PRESIDENT OBAMA: That's what makes us unique.
GLENN: No, no, there's something missing here. What was missing? And you notice
a very long pause before he said it. So I believe he was, "Do I edit, do I edit,
do I edit?"
STU: You don't think it was he was trying to remember the words?
GLENN: No. He's got 1400 TelePrompTers! Really?
STU: Did he have a TelePrompTer at this ?
PAT: He always has a TelePrompTer.
GLENN: He has a TelePrompTer in the bathroom! Have you ever seen him without a
PAT: He doesn't address 6 year olds without a TelePrompTer.
GLENN: Have TelePrompTer, will travel.
PAT: Welcome to the kindergarten class of... 2010.
GLENN: I mean, come on.
STU: True, but I just haven't confirmed it for this.
GLENN: No, I haven't confirmed it, either, but I would be wildly surprised. I'm
surprised that he doesn't have, like, TelePrompTers on leashes where he walks
and, you know, it's like those polls coming out of his belt and they go to the
polls of the TelePrompTer and the TelePrompTers are on little wheels and so
every time he walks, you hear... (making squeaking sounds.). I mean, come on.
The part that he's missing there is that all men are created equal and endowed
by their creator with certain inalienable rights.
Now, I want you to know church is on Sunday; God is the rest of the week. He
forgot God on Friday. However, I believe he may be in Day 2 of the 40 day and 40
night challenge. He may have been impacted by in fact, I'm going to guarantee
that he has been impacted by 8/28. Now, I don't know if that means that's why
he's taking the 40 day and 40 night challenge or if he is, but he has decided
that he's got to go to church. And so the president went to church with his
family yesterday and I think that's grand.
PAT: You think it's grand?
GLENN: I do
PAT: Yeah. You don't because I mean, you don't use that word a lot.
PAT: So I know when you use it, it stands out.
GLENN: It stands out.
GLENN: Yeah. I think it's grand.
PAT: It's grand?
GLENN: I think it is, don't you?
PAT: I think it's marvelous, which is a word I don't use all that often.
GLENN: What's another word that you would use all the time that might fit what
you're really feeling?
PAT: I don't like to get cliche when I'm describing the president, you know,
going to church.
GLENN: No, I understand that. I understand that. So Stu, do you have a word?
STU: Convenient? It's very close to the White House. It's convenient.
GLENN: Oh, yes.
PAT: That's a good word.
GLENN: That's a very good word. For a minute there I thought you were
GLENN: saying it was politically convenient.
STU: No, no, it's close to the White House. It's easy to get to.
GLENN: It is easy to get to. I think you're right. I think you're right. It is
convenient. That's a better word than grand or, what was yours?
GLENN: Yes. Convenient.
GLENN: Convenient is a good word. So I think, America, that just shows how
freaked out of their mind they really are. Now, my staff just fell
PAT: Your staff just fell.
STU: Did your staff fell?
PAT: Did you hear the giant bump? That was the staff. Somebody made him a Moses
walking staff and he brought it into the studio.
GLENN: This is really sweet.
[NOTE: Transcript may have been edited to enhance readability - audio
archive includes full segment as it was originally aired]