GLENN: All right, here is a tape from Tom Cruise. Now, this was not -- this tape was not made for mainstream release and that's why the Church of Scientology is trying to stifle it and shut it down and everything else. However, I mean, we were just talking off the air with the Insiders. You know, I've made a tape for my faith and it's made for release in my faith about how I came to be who I am and the bottom of my story and everything else and that's distributed, et cetera, et cetera, through my faith. That's fine. It's not mainstream. It was made for that. But if somebody goes and takes that and puts it on television, I'm not going to sue them for it. It was never made for mainstream but it's who I am. That's what it is. You know what I mean? I don't think there's anything relevant in there necessarily for, you know, television, et cetera, et cetera but, you know, God bless you. You want to do it, fine. I don't care.
A four-year-old video of Tom Cruise, best know for his role as a stock car driver in the movie Days of Thunder, has been leaked to onto the internet.
STU: More personal with you? You've been talking about your butt surgery for the last three weeks.
GLENN: No, no, but what I'm saying is it's not news. It's news.
STU: Your butt surgery is for some reason.
GLENN: No, do you see what's in USA Today? I don't know why this story just won't go away. Shut up about my butt. I got up this morning and I opened up USA Today and there's the giant story about my butt in USA Today and I'm like, why? Who cares about my butt? Can I be famous for something else?
Anyway, so here's that story. It's out there. I've made it. Fine, you want to put it on TV, whatever. I'm not going to sue you for it. I'm not going to try to stop you from showing it. I don't understand why Tom Cruise and Scientology -- I understand it wasn't made for mainstream release but why would you care if it's released? Maybe because they know it's weird and a little creepy? Because Tom Cruise just kind of stares at the camera for a while and he's got a weird laugh and kind of talks in circles. Now, on the surface he says some things and you're like, okay, I want to be the kind of person that stops at the scene of an accident.
Tom Cruise is the kind of guy who I think he's thwarted several people who are purse snatchers. He tracks them down and gets them, man. I mean, I like Tom Cruise for that. He's actively involved. And if that's what Scientology gives to him, God bless him.
Here's the tape. Listen to this.
CRUISE: I think it's a privilege to call yourself a Scientologist and it's something that you have to earn because a Scientologist does. He or she has the ability to create new and better reality and improve conditions.
GLENN: Okay, stop, stop. Take Scientology out and just put Christianity in, Judaism or whatever. You put that in there. There's nothing wrong with that statement. That's what he believes. You have a better chance at reality, you have a chance at changing things. Okay, so nothing creepy here.
CRUISE: Being a Scientologist, you look at somebody and you know absolutely that you can help them. So for me it really is KSW and it's just like, it's something that I don't mince words with that.
GLENN: Stop. Hang on just a second. You have to hand it to him. He doesn't mince words with it and he's proud of it, then why are you suing. I mean, I don't understand why you are trying to stifle this tape. The other thing is it's really KSW? Stu, do you have any idea?
STU: I have no idea what that is.
GLENN: It's all KSW to me.
STU: OMG, LOL, it's one of those.
GLENN: I'm with you on that. It's a little freaky, the Mission Impossible thing. I mean, I think we should stop with the Mission Impossible thing quite frankly. Going to the Scientology thing, I don't think I need to hear the first three bars of the Mission Impossible thing over and over for ten minutes but now I'm just picking.
CRUISE: Don't mince words with that, with anything. But that policy for me has really gone, boy. There's a time once where I said, you know what, when I read it, you know, I just went, this is it. This is exactly it. Being a Scientologist, when you drive past an accident, it's not like anyone else. It's you drive past; you know you have to do something about it because you know you're the only one that can really help.
GLENN: Okay, stop. This is where I'm kind of nitpicking here. I mean, I think maybe the ambulance workers would be the ones that would help, too, you know. I like the sentiment that if you see -- I mean, I drove with a guy who's in my faith and, you know, there was an accident on the road and he pulls over and I'm like, what are we doing? He's like, Glenn, it's an accident. I'm like, yes. He's like, maybe we can help. And I'm like, oh, wow, yeah. Never thought of that.
I mean, so I like people who are like that, but he never -- if he would have looked at me and said, Glenn, we are the only ones who can help, I would have said, you need to have a drink. What is wrong with you. I don't think we're the only ones that can help. Maybe we can help, yes, but this is where it starts to get into that spooky arrogance of Tom Cruise. Listen to the next couple of lines.
CRUISE: That's what drives me is that I know that we have an opportunity and -- to really help for the first time effectively, to change people's lives and I am dedicated to that. I am absolutely uncompromisingly dedicated to that. Wards are there to help but we, as also the public, we have a responsibility. It's not just (inaudible), it's not just me. It's you, it's everyone out there. Rereading KSW and looking at what needs to be done and saying, okay, am I going to do it or am I not going to do it, period. And am I going to look at that guy or am I too afraid because I have my own ethics, to put in someone else's ethics. And that's all it comes down to. And I won't hesitate to put ethics somewhere else, you know, because I put it ruthlessly myself. And I think that I respect that in others and, you know, I'm there to help. I'm here to help. And my opinion is that, look, either you're on board or you're not on board, okay? Just if you're on board, you're on board just like the rest of us.
GLENN: Stop. This is a little -- is there an innocent, more innocent way to read it? Stu, is there a more innocent way to read it? I mean, you know, you're either on board or you're not on board. It's just a little spooky.
STU: Yeah. You know, he's -- I mean, like again if you -- I guess you could put that into, if you just substitute a religion for religion, I mean, there's certainly a lot of people who would say, hey, you know, the only way, you know, you can really achieve true peace and salvation is by -- you know what I mean? There's certain --
GLENN: I know. But if I was listening to a minister and they said, you know, you're either on board with Jesus or you're not on board and that's just the way it is. You're either on board or not on board. It wouldn't be a good recruiting message for me.
STU: This is what I'm saying. Scientology deals with the same problems that the Democratic party does in some ways in that they love the fact of having celebrities be with them but then unfortunately those celebrities have to talk about them and it leads to many problems because these celebrities many times are not smart, they're not well spoken, they don't know what they're talking about. It happens all the time. And he sounds --
GLENN: He sounds like he knows what he's talking about. Look, here's the thing. Here's the thing that I guess it all boils down to. It doesn't matter if it's Scientology or not. The guy's a religious zealot and if you want to be a religious zealot, be a religious zealot but then make -- you know, don't be uncomfortable that you're in the category of a religious zealot. Don't be uncomfortable that all of a sudden you're Mel Gibson who is very, very Catholic and seems to be very, very weird Catholic like his father and kind of the weird, you know, 800 AD Catholic that also hates Jews. I mean, I don't even know what that Catholic is. But that's who he is. All right. Well, now, deal with it. You know, if you are a religious zealot, you are a religious zealot. Just understand that you can't have it both ways. You can't be a religious zealot and somebody who's like, you're either in the boat or you're not in the boat and then have everybody look at you like, gosh, I just want to hang out with you. Because I don't care what your reaction. You could be Buddha and say that to me; I don't think I want to hang out with you.