State of the Program Address

Stu: Mr. Speaker of the House, the President of the Glenn Beck Program.

Glenn: Thank you, thank you. Why are only half of you standing up, get off your fat ass! Thank you. Thank you. My head writer, staff members, distinguished guests, fellow Glenn Beck fans, seven years have passed since I first stood before this microphone and tried to entertain and enlighten you, emphasis on the word try. Well, I may have done, oh, just a ton of crappy shows since then and it seems like the crappy shows seem to happen from time to time in a much more rapid pace lately, like two or three times a week, sometimes even four or five times a week, I am pleased to report to you that even with all of that show crappiness, the State of the Glenn Beck program is strong! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. We have been busy doing the conservative work, fighting a stubborn enemy, liberal bloggers have posted over 10,000 action alerts to try to get me fired. But thanks to, you know, form being being sponsors and people who are actually born with spines and common sense, today I still have a job and simply by putting the complaints in context, we are making the enemy look even geekier and dumber than ever before. I will -- are you drinking?

Dan: What?

Glenn: I will not back down from that challenge, even if that means complete and utter humiliation. My commitment to this audience is unwavering. Despite having surgery on my butt which went horribly awry, I braved the embarrassment and was interviewed on dozens of television shows, including Good Morning America, where I rehashed my butt story and then I did it again over and over and over again, hundreds of times in interviews with radio hosts, newspaper journalists, and television hosts all across America, time and time again reminding me of the most embarrassing of all hospital procedures, butt surgery. That I had on my butt. Many people laughed at my expense. However, after 1400 interviews and 1 million views of my YouTube video and countless parodies about my butt surgery, it is pretty clear who has gotten the last laugh, my butt! Thank you (applause). Yes. That's right. The one who got the last laugh was my butt which happens to have close proximity to where I keep my wallet! (Applause.) Thank you. Ladies and gentlemen, I am happy to report to you that the state of my butt is strong!

Stu: That's kind of nasty. Can we get past the butt part?

Glenn: I wish we could. Oh, how I wish we could, but while the state of my butt is strong, there are many challenges that I face, such as my abs, my man boobs, the pasty white complex, the receding hairline, the triple chin thing that is getting worse and worse, but I have laid out a plan and I want to address this issue. That's why I beg of you, members of the audience please, please, please, please, please, please, for everything that is good and sacred, please renew the no doughnut left behind act! Why is Ted Kennedy standing on this one? It's like he's got rabies all of a sudden. Look at him foam in the mouth. Doughnuts! We've been doing other important work besides just talking about my butt and eating doughnuts or at least that's what they tell me. We've been also spreading the concept of common sense all across this great land with the help of my administration and the people of people like you everywhere, An Inconvenient Book has been on the "New York Times" best sellers list in the top five for nine weeks, which just proves any man boob can do it (applause) and there is no sign of letting up. That's a good sign that people need hope. They need -- they need to know that hope and change is on the horizon. You can find hope in that. So, on this -- (Applause.) Wait. So, on this day we hope that the hope and change, the kind of change that has changed the way Americans live, will inspire the change that we've so desperately hoped for! (Applause.) And because of change, well, that and ineptness, corruption, an a government that can't get out of its own way, the message of change I bring to you today is this: Our economy is changing. In fact, I think it's pretty much going to crumble right there beneath our -- (Applause.) Yes. I don't know why you're clapping for that one, because that kind of scarce the living dog crap out of me. The message of hope that I bring to you is it just might, if we all work together, it just might not crumble enough to make you stand in line for food (applause) and finally there is one last message of change that I'd like to talk to you about. As I talk about the issues and warn voters against the change dangers of electing a liberal President like Hillary Clinton or John McCain, I want this to be perfect clear. Although most people and our nation's economy would suffer, I mean unbelievably. It would be like hemorrhaging from every pore of your body, oh, but I want you to know, America, and I mean this sincerely, the exact opposite is true for this program!

(Applause.) This election is a win-win for me because if a conservative gets in, we all win: If Hillary Clinton or a democrat gets in, well, I mean, you're screwed to the wall, but my comedy dollars will flow like the salmon of Capistrano. So, remember hope, yes, remember hope and remember change. Thank you and God bless the Glenn Beck program (applause). I've got a doughnut. Fetch, fetch!

Just days after Canadian pastor James Coates was released from prison for refusing to bow to COVID-19 lockdown restrictions, several police officers showed up at another church to ensure restrictions were being followed. But Polish pastor Artur Pawlowski of the Cave of Adullam Church in Alberta, Canada, knew his rights, telling the cops not to come back until they had a warrant in hand.

Filling in for Glenn Beck on the radio program this week, Pat Gray and Stu Burguiere played a video of the interaction.

"Please get out. Please get out of this property immediately. Get out!" Pawlowski can be heard yelling at the six officers who entered his church.

"Out! Out! Out! Get out of this property immediately until you come back with a warrant," he continued. "Go out and don't come back. I don't want to talk to you. You Nazis, Gestapo is not allowed here! ... Nazis are not welcome here! Do not come back you Nazi psychopaths. Unbelievable sick, evil people. Intimidating people in a church during the Passover! You Gestapo, Nazi, communist fascists! Don't you dare come back here!"

Watch this clip to see the heated exchange:

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One of the most dangerous existential threats to the United States is Critical Race Theory, or CRT. As Glenn Beck has exposed over the past year, CRT is gaining momentum and has been preached in our universities for a while now.

Then last August, leaked documents revealed that Marxism, activist ideology of Black Lives Matter, is making its way into grade school classrooms across the country. And since then, things have only gotten more intense.

On next week's Wednesday night special, Glenn will expose the new ways progressives are systematically indoctrinating our kids and culture with this dangerous ideology. But first, it's crucial that you know what your kids may already be learning.

"What I'm about to show you is just the beginning," Glenn said, introducing the leaked documents.

"I found it shocking that Black Lives Matter supporters have developed lesson plans that start from preschool all the way up to the 12th grade," he continued. "Do you know the money it would take to tailor things ... and get it out to the schools and the unions for each age, to be able to brainwash the kids on Marxism and how to destroy capitalism by using race, sexual orientation, and gender?

"Our children don't stand a chance," Glenn added later. "They're not being taught anything except how to be radical activists. What the hell has happened?"

Watch the video clip below or find the full episode here.


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To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

During his campaign, President Joe Biden survived scandal after scandal involving his son Hunter — the Ukraine/Burisma scandal, the laptop scandal, the one involving a stripper from Arkansas and a long-lost child. And yet, after it all appeared to have been swept under the rug, Hunter has now released a memoir — "Beautiful Things."

Filling in for Glenn Beck on the radio program this week, Pat Gray and Stu Burguiere discussed Hunter's "horrible" response when asked on "CBS This Morning" if the laptop seized by the FBI in 2019 belonged to him and reviewed a few segments from his new book, which they agreed raises the question: Is Hunter trying to sabotage his father's career?

Watch the video below for more:


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To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

Countless corporations — from Delta Air Lines, Coca-Cola, and Porsche to UPS and LinkedIn — are calling out the Georgia voting laws, calling them "restrictive," "racist," and "discriminative." Meanwhile, words like "stakeholder" and "equitable" are starting to show up in their arguments.

On the radio program, Glenn Beck gave the "decoder ring" for what's really going on here, because our society is being completely redesigned in front of our eyes.

There's a reason why all these big businesses are speaking out now, and it has very little to do with genuine ideology, Glenn explained. It's all about ESG scores and forcing "compliance" through the monetization of social justice.

Glenn went on to detail exactly what ESG scores are, how they're calculated, and why these social credit scores explain the latest moves from "woke" companies.

Watch the video below to hear Glenn break it down:

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.