The Glenn Beck staff performs an on air intervention

The staff would like to see the happy Glenn Beck, that plays with dolls at Super Bowl parties, come back...

GLENN: Well, here we go. The scourging news of --

STU: Hey, Glenn.


STU: I don't mean to interrupt you here -- well, I do. That's exactly why I did it. The reason why I did it is because we feel that we need to have an intervention.

DAN: All of us. We're all here.

STU: We're all your friends. We care about you and we don't want to see you --

SARAH: I'm here for you.

STU: See, we love you, Glenn, at least we love the salaries you pay us. We don't want to see --

GLENN: You don't actually love me.

STU: We're just going to leave that one unanswered.

DAN: Don't look into that.

STU: There's no need. This isn't about us. It's about you.

GLENN: It's about me.

STU: And we care about you in some ways and we believe that perhaps we've noticed a slight change in the attitude. I know you are bleeding internally and I know --

GLENN: I'm literally bleeding internally, literally bleeding internally, yes.

DAN: You've had some trouble sleeping, we understand. We just think, you know --

STU: We've noticed a harshness that has occurred.

DAN: It's going south, your attitude. It seems to be --

STU: There have been words used by you that are hurtful and constant lately.

DAN: And not becoming of the new Glenn Beck.

STU: No, because I remember you saying, you know, that you were changing your ways and it was more of a positive Glenn Beck.

GLENN: That was really a long time ago. That was a long time ago. That was before the McCain win.

STU: No, I mean, I do realize that.

GLENN: I mean, I'm just using the -- you know, I'm just using Republican language. I mean, I believed in that yesterday but today I believe the exact opposite.

STU: You flip-flopped. Listen --

GLENN: No. I've just changed what I believe. I was strongly trying to be a good person yesterday. Today not so much.

STU: Would you say that we might be able to get a -- turning down the harshness of Glenn Beck just a couple of notches today?

STU: That's a good point, Dan. He sounds like a crotchety old man that's angry.

GLENN: What have I done?

STU: I'm just saying that maybe you've been calling people son of a bitch like crazy and you've been saying everything is damn this and damn that and I --

GLENN: Really?

STU: Yes, all over the board.

DAN: You are not 87 years old yet.

STU: You sound like, that's exactly -- that's a good point, Dan. He sounds like a crotchety old man that's angry.

GLENN: I am angry today.

STU: Can you calm down a little?

GLENN: Wait, wait. Has this been going on a long time?

STU: There's been a slow increase over the past couple of weeks especially with your illness. I think your filters are turning off.

GLENN: Because I'm not even filtering my blood. My blood is being filtered by, like, my skin now. It's just --

STU: Can't you just kind of, you know, recognize some of the absurdity of what we're going through here, we have a good time with it and we just, you know, hey, everyone likes each other and, you know, the nice kind.

GLENN: But they don't like each other.

STU: I'm saying you, not they. There's no they, Glenn. Who is they? Everyone likes you. We're friends here. Sarah's right here. She hasn't said anything but she's right here.

SARAH: Hi, Glenn, yeah.

STU: See, she's right here. We asked her, we forced her to come in here so there would be a girl voice in the room.

GLENN: Are you being forced in this, Sarah?

SARAH: No, not at all. I'm here for you. I'm worried about you.

GLENN: I think she's -- I think that's a recording of Sarah.

STU: Maybe.

GLENN: I think you forced her to say those things and you bound her up and you put her in a closet.

STU: Well, she wouldn't have said them if we told her the context. I'm just saying that we just need a little bit of the smooth -- can you mellow out? Is there any tea you can have?

GLENN: So what you're saying --

STU: Is there a nice soft, you know, like one of those chamomile, do you have any chamomile?

GLENN: So maybe what you're saying is like in alcoholic meetings where I was really bummed when I first went because I thought we talked about which drinks were our favorite drinks. They don't do that.

STU: No.

GLENN: That's a trick just to get you in.

STU: Right.

GLENN: What they'll say is some days you'll get there and you'll be like what you're saying I am now and they will say, hey, Glenn, maybe today is a day you should shut up and just listen.

STU: Yes, I love this idea. Why don't you just listen. I would say that you should not be held responsible for anything that you've said today or will say in the future and maybe you should just listen to callers. What are they thinking, Glenn? What are they feeling today?

Legal scholar and famed criminal defense attorney Alan Dershowitz has a message for partisans dividing America: "A plague on both your houses." He voted for Hillary Clinton. He endorsed Joe Biden. He's a man who is basically the Forrest Gump of American judicial history.

Look up a big court case over the past few decades, and you'll probably see him standing in the background. He's represented notorious clients like Mike Tyson, Patty Hearst, Harry Reems, Harvey Weinstein, Jeffrey Epstein, and yes, Donald Trump. It's made him a target for both the left and right.

Alan also describes himself as a "civil libertarian," and that's probably why he and Glenn Beck get along despite their opposing political views. His story is like a history lesson, spanning half a century, and it just might be the key to bridging the political divide.

On this week's podcast, Alan explained that while he's a strong defender of the Constitution, he's never been a big fan of the Second Amendment. In the past he's called it absurd and outdated, and even today, he admits that he wouldn't have ingrained it into our Constitution if he was a framer. However, with the whole Bill of Rights under attack, he's now fully in defense of our right to bear arms. Because if the Second Amendment changes, any amendment could be next.

"I'm now a supporter of the Second Amendment. I don't want to change it. I don't want to change one word of it, because I'm afraid that if I get to change the Second Amendment, other people will get to change the First Amendment, and the Fifth Amendment," Alan said. "So, I am committed to preserving the Bill of Rights, every single word, every comma, and every space between the words."

Watch a clip from the full interview with Alan Dershowitz below:

Watch the full podcast below, on Glenn's YouTube channel, or on Blaze Media's podcast network.

Want to listen to more Glenn Beck podcasts?

Subscribe to Glenn Beck's channel on YouTube for FREE access to more of his masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, or subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

Investigative reporter David Steinberg joined the radio program Monday, to explain how a new video may provide enough evidence to begin a FBI investigation into alleged illegal practices by Minnesota Rep. Ilhan Omar's campaign.

In the video, which was produced and released by Project Veritas, residents of Omar's community describe campaign teams that not only conduct illegal ballot harvesting practices but also pay people for their blank absentee ballots.

Steinberg told Glenn that, if these charges prove to be true, the federal government could bypass Omar's friend and protector, Minnesota Attorney General Keith Ellison. Could 2020 be the beginning of the end for Omar's political career?

Watch the video below to catch Glenn's conversation with David Steinberg:

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

Mike Fratantuono is the manager of Sunset Restaurant in Glen Burnie, Maryland. He wrote in the Washington Post's COVID-19 series about the recent, heartbreaking loss of his business, a restaurant that has been in his family for "four generations and counting."

"I know this virus is real, okay? It's real and it's awful. I'm not disputing any of that," Mike wrote. "But our national hysteria is worse. We allowed the virus to take over our economy, our small businesses, our schools, our social lives, our whole quality of life. We surrendered, and now everything is infected."

On the radio program Monday, Glenn Beck reacted to Mike's letter, which he shared in full, adding his hope that those in government are ultimately held responsible for what he called the biggest theft of the Western world.

"This is the biggest theft of, not only money, but of heritage and of hope," Glenn said. "The United States government and many of the states are responsible for this, not you. And hopefully someday soon, we'll return to some semblance of sanity, and those responsible for this theft, this rape of the Western world, will be held responsible."

Watch the video below for more details:

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

We did our homework over the weekend; we did the research so we can tell you what is likely coming from Senate Democrats regarding President Trump's Supreme Court Nominee Amy Coney Barrett. Based on our research and the anonymous people who have already come forward to talk about Coney Barrett's youth, these are the main shocking things you can expect Senate Democrats to seize on during the confirmation process…

A man has come forward under the banner of "#MenToo," to say that in second grade, Amy Coney Barrett and her best friend at the time, cornered him at a birthday party at Chuck-E-Cheese and "injected him with a full dose of cooties." Which, if true, would obviously be disqualifying for serving on the highest court in the land.

Then there's a woman who says when she was nine-years-old, she lived on the same street as Amy Coney Barrett. She alleges that Coney-Barrett borrowed her VHS tape of Herbie Goes Bananas and did not return it for at least six months. And then when she did finally get the tape back, the woman says Coney Barrett did not even bother to rewind it. The FBI has interviewed at least two witnesses so far who say the tape was indeed not rewound and that it was very upsetting to the owner of the tape. Again, if true, this is troubling – clearly not the kind of integrity you want to see in a Supreme Court justice.

Apparently, in their elementary school days, they liked to drink milk – and lots of it.

The same neighbor also dropped a bombshell allegation about the drinking problem of Amy Coney Barrett and her closest friends. Apparently, in their elementary school days, they liked to drink milk – and lots of it. The neighbor says she "frequently" witnessed Coney-Barrett and her friends chugging entire cartons of milk – often Whole Milk, sometimes Chocolate Milk, occasionally both at the same time through a funnel.

Unfortunately, shooting-up cooties, injurious rewinding, and potential calcium-abuse are not even the worst of it.

A third person has now come forward, another man, and this is just reprehensible, it's hard to even fathom. But he alleges that in fourth grade, when they were around ten-years-old, Amy Coney Barrett and a group of "four or five of her friends" gang-GRAPED him on the playground during recess. He alleges the group of friends snuck uneaten grapes out of the cafeteria and gang-GRAPED him repeatedly in broad daylight. In other words, and I hate to have to spell this out because it's kind of graphic, but the group led by ten-year-old Amy Coney Barrett pelted this poor defenseless boy with whole grapes. He recalls them "laughing the whole time" as they were gang-GRAPING him.

He recalls them "laughing the whole time" as they were gang-GRAPING him.

Obviously, even if just one of these allegations is half-true, no Senator with a conscience could possibly vote to confirm Coney Barrett. When there is a clear pattern of destructive childhood behavior, it always continues into adulthood. Because people do not change. Ever.

Fortunately, for the sake of the Republic, Democrats plan to subpoena Coney Barrett's childhood diary, to see what, if any, insights it may provide into her calcium habits, as well as her abuse of illicit cooties and the gang-GRAPING incident.

We will keep you posted on the latest, but for now, it looks like Democrats will find plenty in the reckless pre-teen life of Amy Coney Barrett to cast doubt on her nomination. And if not, they can always fall back on her deranged preference for letting babies be born.

[NOTE: The preceding was a parody written by MRA writer Nathan Nipper.]