GLENN: Well, it's Friday. So I thought we would spend just a couple of minutes just looking to see how stupid some liberals really can be.
STU: I disagree with this analysis. They have caught us in something.
GLENN: Oh, have they? Is this just a blog, Stu? Is this what this is?
STU: I believe it's a college newspaper, Glenn.
GLENN: Oh, it's a college -- it's a college -- this is from the Lantern.
STU: This is a college-educated --
GLENN: Oh, this is from Frank Blechschmidt. He is a junior in economics and journalism.
STU: We should point out he is, A, our favorite Blechschmidt and, B, yes, a journalist in training, a person who will be a journalist.
GLENN: He will graduate to be a journalist and he's from Ohio State University and here is the -- and Adam's looking through the door because his son graduated from Ohio. He's like... yeah, and you paid lots of money for that education, my friend.
STU: Poor Adam.
GLENN: Here it is. Here's the story.
STU: Wait it. We love it. We absolutely love it. We're just learning about journalists named Blechschmidt.
GLENN: It's actually Blechschmidt. Yeah, Frank Blechschmidt. He should probably change his name.
Beck's antics pollute airwaves and TV.
STU: You're slandering. That means you are saying something that's untrue. Maybe you didn't understand.
GLENN: No, no. "If you've wandered down High Street lately," and I bet Frank might have been wandering down High Street lately based just on his journalism, "you may have most likely seen the advertisements for Glenn Beck on Headline News with words 'Cut the crap' written in bold letters on the side of buses." By the way, has anybody else noticed that they have put my head, you know, right on the word "Crap" they have my head right there where the -- well, where the A hole is.
STU: What a surprise.
GLENN: Listen. Anyway, "for those unfamiliar with Beck, he is the opinionated host of the heavily conservative radio show the Glenn Beck program which can be seen weeknights on CNN Headline News. Personally I enjoy tuning in to his show every once in a while just to see what crazy hypocritical things he has to say and because the media lacks well balanced political opinion radio shows. Last week, however, he said something that made me fear for the wellbeing of voters and their exposure to slanted media coverage. On his radio show Wednesday, Beck went on for about 20 minutes, a 20 minute rant on how Hillary Clinton is racist and anyone who supports her or her policies is probably racist, too."
I remember this routine.
STU: I remember this.
GLENN: This was a good monologue.
STU: Right. I mean, you know, we had the facts.
GLENN: Yeah. "His proof? First, he said, is her policy to remove troops from Iraq is racist and only benefits whites because the Army is 71% white and only 11% black."
We've got to get Frank on the phone. I've got his e-mail address. I don't want to give it out on air. I've got to have Frank on the phone on Monday.
STU: You don't want -- wait a minute. You don't want --
STU: Isn't it on the Internet? You are not getting it from some secret source? You are not good buddies?
GLENN: No, no, I want people to write and just say, you dope.
STU: I don't want to ruin it. I kind of want to talk to him when he still thinks it's real.
GLENN: Should I black out his e-mail address when we put it in the newsletter?
GLENN: Okay. "Next he said her policy to raise taxes on the rich clearly hurts minorities and the American dream because 7 out of the 10 ten richest athletes are black and one is Hispanic."
STU: How could anyone believe that's a legitimate point?
GLENN: You know what? Because these people really truly believe that we're this stupid. You know what I mean? They just have -- well, first of all he's got to be a pinhead. No, oh, my gosh, wait a minute. Maybe I'm doing the same thing. Maybe this is a parody on my parody.
STU: I did think about that. And maybe it is.
STU: It's so horribly -- it's so dumb that maybe it is a joke. But again we don't know.
GLENN: Okay. "He also had similar outrageous claims of racism in regard to healthcare reform. Finally" -- this is it, man. I mean, listen to this. "Finally he even went as far as to contend that Hillary's lack of support for oil and coal companies has an underlying racist sentiment as well because oil and coal are black." How do you possibly think that this was -- this is -- America, this is the future generation. This is the future of journalism.
STU: Again, I mean, in case you happened to miss this and your name is not Frank --
GLENN: Blechschmidt. Blechschmidt.
STU: The point of it was look how easily you can make these accusations.
GLENN: The whole point was that all you have to do is cherry-pick a few things and you can make these claims. It's so easy to do it. And so we turned -- we used their tactic. But just because we wanted to show you how ridiculous the tactic is, I pointed out coal and oil is also black.
STU: He was really appalled by that one, by the way.
GLENN: I know. He says wow. That's all he says, wow. That's his whole line, wow. "Although Beck repeatedly said he was merely providing the facts," -- I said it like this, too. I'm just telling you the facts here. Really, oil and coal, she's against it! It's black!
"He's obviously ignoring the fact that according the 2000 census, 75% of the American population is white." This guy went and Googled facts to take apart -- it's like doing an -- it's like spending hours googling facts to disprove that Kenny has been killed yet again on South Park.
STU: He was never really alive. He's animated!
GLENN: He's a cartoon and they killed him last episode. I don't think he's ever been killed! "I'm not trying to get on the soapbox to promote Hillary Clinton, but she was clearly being victimized. She is not a racist. Her policies are pretty sympathetic toward minorities if you ask me. In reality Beck is just the latest in a long line of conservative spin doctors.
STU: That's really, by the way, he's letting you know what reality is, this guy. Just call it educated journalist of the future.
GLENN: "These pundits will always be around and that's fine, it's a free country. I just hope anyone listening to his show or similar shows during this election season" -- listen to this from Frank Blechschmidt. "At least I want you to know I hope that anyone listening to his show this election season will think critically before they believe what they hear. Frank, I hope so too. Most college students can easily find the flaws in these skewed arguments."
STU: (Laughing). Yes, most of them can.
GLENN: My 3-year-old son Rafe could find a flaw in Hillary Clinton's racist because she is against drilling for oil because it's black. "With our nation's economy and foreign relations in shambles, voters should not cast their ballots based on their favorite pundit's opinion. But unfortunately with the Democratic primary you're going to have to face a barrage of twisted arguments from people such as Beck."
STU: Luckily, Glenn, it's not these stupid talk show listeners.
GLENN: He just wants to know that there's plenty of time to cut the crap. All I have to do to be successful is to cut out the facts and the logic. Why should I do that Frank, you've already done it.