STU: Yes, comrade!
GLENN: Good news from the Western front!
STU: I bet there is.
GLENN: Talk radio is starting to suck beyond belief because they're adopting our Soviet principles.
STU: Soviet talk radio.
STU: In the motherland.
STU: That was low quality radio.
GLENN: That's good low quality radio only to be found in a socialist nation.
STU: And soon hopefully the Fairness Doctrine might come back and they can tell us exactly what we can and cannot say! On the Western front.
GLENN: Yes. Comrade, we have been working towards this for a very, very long time. I remember, comrade, back in the Fifties. We looked at each other wearing those furry hats.
GLENN: The star on them.
STU: Kind of stumbling over really cheap vodka.
GLENN: Very cheap vodka.
STU: Free vodka.
GLENN: For a while there, there was more vodka in my bloodstream than blood but that's a whole different story.
STU: There was blood in your vodka?
GLENN: Yes. Do you remember when we were planning the destruction of the West? Those were the glory days.
STU: Those were the -- you mean when we were doing it overtly?
GLENN: Yeah, when we were actually getting together and we were like, comrade, we've got another way to destroy the West.
STU: Those were the days.
GLENN: And remember when we thought we should start small and then just let it trickle down, kind of like that, what was his face, Reagan with his trickle down economics.
STU: Oh, the enemy.
GLENN: Trickle-down communism. It's fantastic. So what we decided to do, if you remember, comrade, was --
STU: I do remember.
GLENN: -- let's bleed them dry. Let's help them make just stupid decision after stupid decision after stupid decision. We could use our tools like the unions and get them into all kinds of pensions and all kinds of special programs. It would be fantastic. Oh. Well, comrade, good news from the Western front, the Far West. We've got a city in California now that is -- are you ready? The first to go bankrupt. It's fantastic.
STU: Has Dennis Kucinich got another mayoral job?
GLENN: No, he's been busy, he's been busy on the federal level. Almost had him, too. Damn, those space aliens.
Here's the story, comes out of California. There's a financial crisis now. More than three years after the state took over the city's debt-ridden public schools, the state did --
STU: Should we just -- are we just passing over that part, comrade?
STU: That the state took over?
GLENN: Took over their debt-ridden public schools?
STU: What, no, this was all part of the plan. This is fantastic.
GLENN: As soon as the state crumbles, it can be kicked up to the Feds. Then when the Feds, when they crumble, we're there to pick up the pieces, comrade!
STU: Oh, the Politburo can just take over.
GLENN: So three years after the state took over the city's debt-ridden public schools as a result of snowballing police and firefighter salaries and overtime expenses coupled with plummeting tax revenue from a weak housing market, this city is finally completely out of cash. Spending $10 million more than they received in tax revenue. They would take in $4 million; they would spend $10 million. The city council and the mayor have met on it and they said, we've just been making mistakes for a very long time. Quote: We've been spending money that we haven't had for a very long time. It was only a matter of time before this happened.
STU: Oh, comrade.
GLENN: This is great news.
STU: Comrade, you know what's great about it, too?
STU: Is that we've convinced the people in the Western Front that competition just won't work in schools. There shouldn't be vouchers and people choosing good schools and rewarding them.
GLENN: Of course not.
STU: No, we should just give these people all of the money so they can spend two and a half times that amount and then fail. This is fantastic. And the best part is they are not even going to get a good education with that money.
GLENN: Now listen, my comrade friend. The best news is this is happening in California. We have California on the brink of disaster. If California fails, they will shove all that debt to the federal government, and the federal government says we'll have to save California because California, we can't let all those people fail out there, we can't let them lose their house, we can't let them not have fire and police and school. We've got to take it on as a nation and we'll shoulder the burden together. Then it will just be a giant domino effect.
STU: Let's make sure I understand, comrade, because this seems to be working well.
STU: So Government controls the schools.
STU: And then the government-controlled schools fail. So the government-controlled state takes over the government-controlled school and then the government-controlled federal takes over the government-controlled state which overtook the government-controlled school and all of them failed.
GLENN: And then, and then when it all fails, then the global government can take on everyone's debt and we can share the pain and the wealth. Comrade, great, great news from the Western front today! Oh, that's great. (Gunshot).