Glenn Beck: No horsing around

May 05, 2008

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GLENN: You know what, I've got a problem -- just a sidebar here, your Honor. I'm really torn on this story because what a crappy designer God was with horses. I mean, what happened to evolution here? The horse didn't grow thicker ankles? He's a horse! He's got like a -- it's like a car on Popsicle sticks. What kind of -- I don't believe in evolution. Look at the horse! If evolution existed, you know what horses would look like -- you know what? In fact, stop with the breed -- have you seen that they're breeding pigs and people? I don't think I need a pig person. I don't need it. I don't need half human/half pig. I don't know why we're breeding them, I don't know why we're mixing the DNA in the pigs and the people. I think that's a really bad idea. Now, you want to mix people and an animal? Horses and Hillary Clinton. "Give a horse a chance. Give a horse Hillary's ankles." What's wrong with us, pigs and people! Horses and Hillary! I mean, horses need cankles. They have got a serious cankleage problem. There's a serious cankle shortage in horses and I think we need to -- okay. How about this? Can't we just make a cart for the horse? Can't we -- I mean, how about -- we kill the horse? You can't live without the two front? How about we cut off all the legs? I'm being -- I know this sounds harsh but how about we cut off all the legs? I mean, not all the way. We cut them to the knees and we, like, glue hooves to their -- this can be done, to their knees so they don't have, you know -- look, I told you in the -- I'm not -- I'm not a vet, but I'm a thinker. I don't know, but I don't think shooting them is the right thing. I mean, is the billionaires that had these horses, I'm just -- I mean, don't you think that they owe it to the horse to be like, "Oh, you were a good horse until you broke your ankles; I'm going to sit you down if a big pile of horse, have you look at a hot horse over here. I might milk you from time to time, you know what I'm saying, but I think you like that. Here, have some more LSD." I think the owners owe it to them. Don't you think it's at least worth a try? "Oh, Glenn, horses want to run. They want to be free. The horse wouldn't enjoy life at all if he couldn't run around." Really? You really think you enjoy some guy wearing a dopey outfit jumping on him and saying run faster, run faster, run faster, run fast until he breaks his ankles because got didn't think, "Oh, no, Hillary's the only one with fat legs, she needs those. Next time I see Hillary Clinton running around a racetrack in her bare feet coming out of the gate, yeah, then I'll thing she needs those cankles. In the meantime, give them the horses. And I don't understand how they can break -- again, it's not like we're running them on asphalt. They're running in the dirt. From the makers of your weak ankles comes the track. It's a dirt track made by God, and they even, like, make sure all the rocks are out of it. God didn't even do that. We had to invent a tractor to make sure there was nothing in your path. And like you like to run. Horses like to run. Every time they run on something where we raked it so no rocks are there, nothing can hurt them and cause a booboo, they break their ankles. And every time I see a horse at a farm in a giant field, you know what they're doing? They are just standing there eating. They are not running around. I never see them running around. They are just eating. They look up at you like, "Wouldn't you like to be me right now?" No, because I'd have to stand and eat all the time. Can't I just sit down? I think I would have to stand and sleep. I don't want to sleep standing up. What a nightmare that would be. Oh, he's worrying about you are going to fall over? It's a bad -- that's a bad life. I think if I had to sleep standing up and eat -- I mean, and eat standing up? I think I would want my legs amputated. Just take you down to the butt so I can just sit here. I'm closer to the ground.

News flash to horse racing fans. I don't think the horses really want to run around for you, for entertainment. I'm just -- I mean, I think horses are nice animals that just want to help out. They have been screwed by the car. That's what it is. Now horses are going, "We were so popular. Everybody loved us. I mean, what happened? I mean, now, you know, oh, you got your new shiny new love machine, yeah. I mean, we used to be able to crap in the streets, they would take us places, we would be with the family. Now they just put us out to pasture and shoot us when we can't run fast enough."

I blame Ford. That's who I blame. The Depression rates for horses must be outrageous. I mean, they were for centuries carrying us around. Everywhere we wanted to go: Hey, horse. And then we would give them a nice brushdown at the end of the day. Then we invented the car. That's really when it went south for the horse, it is. That's it. I mean, we're like, hmmm, you're great and everything, but you've got one horsepower. You know what I'm saying? So how do we repay them for the centuries of work? Run faster. You're in second? We put you down. "That's sidebar, your Honor." That's probably the best thing about the horse race this weekend. If you had your kids there, you could teach them a lesson. "That's what happens to kids who are in second place." Yeah, now how much do you want to succeed? "Daddy, we'll do that to you, too." "What was your test score again? I'm looking forward to your report card, son." I think we need to come up with a better system for the horse. I don't know what it is. Maybe it's universal horse care. I don't know. I don't know how many of these horses have insurance. You know what I think it is? I think that a horse vet, I think once they are really good at being a horse vet because all they do is they're like, "Yeah, got to put them down." What? "Yeah, nothing we can do." "He lost a tooth." "Got to shoot him in the head." I think -- you know what? I think the really good horse veterinarians, I think when they leave that, they immediately go to work behind the genius counter at Apple because that's who those people are. They're horse vets. You bring in your computer and you're like, "The letter C keeps sticking." "Let me just listen to it here." Then they put their ear up to it like they're like, like the computer's like, "Help me, help me, I'm broken over here." They put it up to their ear. "Yep, got to put it down." "Really? You can't fix it?" "Nope. Got to shoot it. Need a new one." "Didn't I see you at the derby?" "Don't know what you're talking about."

You know what we should do? I think we should come up with a -- you know those stupid segways that only geeks have? Seriously, I mean, I didn't want to break it to Michael Bublé but I saw him backstage a couple of weeks ago and he had a segway. Now, that's cool because you are only bringing it back, you know, backstage but don't ever be seen in public, Michael, on a segway. It makes you a geek. It does. I think the seg -- because they have got to be piled up around somewhere. Who knows. I mean, mall security. You want to look like a guy from mall security, get yourself a segway. Congratulations, you're a loser. I think that all the extra segways that are sitting on some lot somewhere, I don't even know, are they -- you know, are they -- I don't even know where you buy them but they are sitting on some lot some place just being rained on all the time. I say we take them and we strap them to the legs of horses. You break your ankle, great, we give you LSD and strap a couple of segways to you and you're set. Now you can run/roll wherever you want. You'll never fall down. It will be great for them sleeping. It's got that gyroscope thing in it so you never fall down. It's fantastic for horses. I mean, this is the home of capitalism, jeez, for the love of Pete we can't -- I mean, we can't come up with something? Have I thought about this too much this weekend? It was a slow weekend at my house. Maybe it's just me.

Elon Musk challenges sexual misconduct accuser to describe certain 'one thing' about his private parts

Photo by JIM WATSON/AFP via Getty Images

Elon Musk responded to allegations that he exposed himself to a corporate jet flight attendant by daring his accuser to "describe just one thing, anything at all (scars, tattoos, …) that isn’t known by the public."

"I have a challenge to this liar who claims their friend saw me “exposed” – describe just one thing, anything at all (scars, tattoos, …) that isn’t known by the public. She won’t be able to do so, because it never happened," Musk posted on twitter.

A Business Insider report on Thursday, alleged that a flight attendant for SpaceX's private jet fleet was paid $250,000 in 2018 to settle a sexual misconduct claim against the company's founder and CEO. A friend of the flight attendant signed a declaration accusing the tech billionaire of exposing himself to the attendant, who is also a licensed massage therapist, during an in-flight massage.

According to the declaration, the flight attendant told her friend that Musk asked her to come to his private cabin "for a full body massage" during a flight in late 2016. When she arrived, Musk "was completely naked except for a sheet covering the lower half of his body." The friend also told Insider that Musk propositioned the flight attendant, then "touched her thigh and told her he would buy her a horse."

One day before the Insider story was published, Musk predicted an escalation in political attacks against him after revealing on a podcast that he plans to vote Republican in the next election cycle.

Political attacks on me will escalate dramatically in coming months
— Elon Musk (@Elon Musk) 1652890958

Musk called the sexual misconduct allegations "wild accusations [that] are utterly untrue" and challenged his accuser to verify her claims by describing a certain something “not known by the public" about his private parts.

The attacks against me should be viewed through a political lens \u2013 this is their standard (despicable) playbook \u2013 but nothing will deter me from fighting for a good future and your right to free speech
— Elon Musk (@Elon Musk) 1653017312

But I have a challenge to this liar who claims their friend saw me \u201cexposed\u201d \u2013 describe just one thing, anything at all (scars, tattoos, \u2026) that isn\u2019t known by the public. She won\u2019t be able to do so, because it never happened.
— Elon Musk (@Elon Musk) 1653020653

On the radio program Friday, Glenn Beck and Pat Gray reacted to the incredible "coincidence" of such allegations cropping up just days after the SpaceX CEO announced his intention to vote Republican in the next election cycle — not to mention joining Glenn's longrunning anti-ESG crusade by calling the corporate score system a "scam."

pic.twitter.com/0vWlu6IAJl
— Glenn Beck (@Glenn Beck) 1652894352

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Leaked contemporaneous notes reveal Anita Dunn's 6-month crafting of ultra-MAGA 'slam' on Trump

Gage Skidmore/Flickr

Anyone paying attention can see that President Biden is in dire straights come 2024, regardless of who his opponent may be. His administration has been workshopping several ideas to try and craft just the right message. One that will cut through all the noise (failures) and put him on a more solid footing should he go head-to-head in a rematch with the former President.

Biden called in the big guns and he wasn't afraid to call in a few favors either. He drew on his stint as VP and called Anita Dunn out of the bullpen and tapped the Center for American Progress Action Fund to try and help pull this one out. After an exhaustive six-month-long study into how President Trump was able to summon the magic of MAGA — they finally feel they have the winning message.

Dunn has gotten sloppy, however, since her days in the Obama administration. We obtained her contemporaneous notes and emails showing how they coined the term "ultra-MAGA," trying to get a little "extra pop" to his rhetoric. The leaked emails also show the evolution of the messaging over that same six-month period.

[The preceding Memo was a parody written by MRA writers Josh Jennings and Jon Boldt – not the Biden administration.]

Biden crime family: Why Hunter’s secrets are REALLY about Joe

Almost every week, new incriminating evidence is mined from Hunter’s wild laptop. And the proof is mounting that President Joe Biden is lying about his knowledge of his family’s crooked deal-making. Everyone knows Hunter Biden is a seriously degenerate guy. Anyone who has handled his infamous laptop needs a tetanus shot.

The salacious stuff on the laptop is sad and pathetic for sure, but that stuff is NOT what is most relevant to the United States. Glenn Beck exposes how the laptop is REALLY about Joe Biden, his abuse of power as vice president, and his ongoing denials now as president.

Now that the 2020 election has passed and their man is in office, the mainstream media have suddenly decided to admit Hunter’s laptop is not Russian disinformation after all. No one has done more research into the Biden family corruption than journalist and best-selling author Peter Schweizer. He has researched the depths of Hunter’s laptop and found more than racy photos. “These aren’t HUNTER’S business deals,” Peter says, “they benefit the WHOLE family.” And he has the emails to prove it.

But the mainstream media still insist President Biden is as pure as his thinning white hair in all of this. As Glenn reveals tonight, he is not. But will anyone in the Biden family see jail time? Americans are fed up with two sets of rules – one for regular citizens and one for the ruling elites.

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Top 5 times corporate WOKENESS crossed the line

Intelligent people know that wokerness plagues society and must be ridiculed and eradicated from conversations. But what happens when people lose their jobs for calling out the absurdity of woke ideology? What happens when corporations and media sources weaponize wokeness?

Here are five videos that will help us better understand a few of the many issues that wokeness inflicts on society and how we can stand against it.

Bye bye, Target. You crossed the line!

In this clip, BlazeTV host Allie Stuckey of "Relatable" explains how Target recently announced the sale of chest binders and "packing underwear" for women. She expresses how children can be negatively impacted by the sale of confusing clothing items for people suffering from gender dysphoria and the importance of loving the body God gave us.

Today, Allie notices that Target's stock experienced a 35-year record drop. Apparel was named as one of the two underperforming departments. Was pushback from critics of gender-affirming apparel the cause? It is hard to tell, but Allie encourages her audience to continue speaking out when corporations cross the line by making harmful products available for sale to the public.

Listen to the podcast here.

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Wokeness can get you fired

In this clip, Stu Burguiere covers a story about a man who challenged Black Lives Matter using nothing but data and was fired.

Here's the story: "I had been at Thomson Reuters for over six years—most recently, leading a team of data scientists applying new machine learning and artificial intelligence algorithms to our legal, tax and news data. We advised any number of divisions inside the company, including Westlaw, an online legal research service used by most every law firm in the country, and the newsroom, which reaches an audience of one billion every day around the globe. I briefed the Chief Technology Officer regularly. My total annual compensation package exceeded $350,000." Read more

"We live in the era of woke religion," says Stu.

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Coca-Cola circumvents Constitution with TERRIFYING mandates on diversity

Glenn Beck loves Coca-Cola. So much so, in fact, that he refuses to drink Pepsi if Coke isn't available. But ... he says the time has come for him to give up his favorite soda. Why? Because Coca-Cola just announced some terrifying new company policies on diversity and equity. It sent out notices to all partnered law firms, demanding a required percentage of diverse attorneys on any legal team working for the corporation. The notice says all legal teams also must report these numbers quarterly and they will lose Coca-Cola's business if they do not comply.

"Equity is not the same thing as equality," Glenn said, adding that equality means we all have an equal chance, while equality means we all have the same outcome.

Glenn explains how mandates like this could affect everybody — even the guy working on the factory line or the truck driver delivering the drinks. Glenn also explains how Coke's new move is nothing less than a circumvention of the Constitution, and he predicts more companies (especially those in support of the Great Reset) will follow with similar policies, too.

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Coca-Cola takes a 'pause' on woke initiatives after after pressure from the Right

Glenn followed up on a story about Coca-Cola becoming the poster child for how a corporation could shove leftist ideologies onto its consumers. The company suspended advertising on Facebook in a push to censor former President Donald Trump, published a manifesto about racial equity, and demanded all legal teams working for Coke meet certain diversity quotas.

But, after Trump, Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas), Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.), and many other conservative voices called for a boycott of the company's products, Coca-Cola appeared to shift directions.

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Calvin Klein's gender blender ruins sex and Mothers' Day

Chad Prather reflected back to the Great Depression era of enticing photographic entertainment, otherwise known as the callow and deprived years of his youth, when a Calvin Klein pictorial of old would have represented something exciting, something to, say, think about at the end of the day. Had he run across this present weird concept at that age, he would have either been disgusted on sight … or possibly really disgusted when his dumb a** put two and two together the next day. Anyway, his point is: Has the whole world gone crazy? Do we really need this? At this inclusive embracing point in our recent history, what in the world makes Calvin Klein feel the need to be the standard-bearer for a lifestyle screamed largely into existence by a very vocal minority?

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Former Disney artist SPEAKS OUT: ‘It’s time to do something’

A former Disney artist, who wishes to remain anonymous, joins Glenn to describe WHY he recently took action against his former employer: ‘I'm tired of watching my country go down the drain. And it's time to do something.’ Today’s woke Disney is not what Walt once imagined, he says, and his recent video release — "It’s A Woke World After All" — exposes Disney’s large stray from its roots ...

Listen to the podcast here.