Love is in the air, including free Valentine's day audio


Couple Of The Year - Volume 1

Quite possibly our favorite show of the year-the "Couple of the Year" presentation. Listen back to some of our best moments from these classic shows - available as a CD or download it instantly in MP3 format.

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Free audio: After Hours with Delino

Now, here's a story I found: Surprising reasons you're not having sex. Here's the first one. Your bed isn't sexy anymore. We hear it over and over again the bed should be used for sex and sleep only. So why do we insist on bringing in third parties, laptops, PDAs, Law and Order, et cetera, et cetera. You know what, my doctor has actually told me that, under doctors' orders, nothing else in bed. He said just sleep. And I went, just sleep? And my wife said, you heard him; just sleep. "Your meds are stealing away your sex drive." Whoa. Surprised by that one. Reason number 3: You're not having sex anymore. Your crazy, busy life. (Crackling noise). "I'm in Cairo." Sex RX, I don't even know what that means -- oh, that means what you're supposed to do. I don't care about that one. Next one: You don't like your body. This isn't a new development. Never have. Lucky for me. A long time ago I decided I'm not having sex with me. "You've hit premenopause." Can I? Next one, "Your man's just not into that." Wait a minute. This might be written for women. "You're depressed." Yeah, because I'm not having sex anymore! The last one is "You're sick and tired." Now, wait a minute. It says because you have a thyroid condition. Wouldn't you know because don't your eyes pop out with a thyroid condition? Seriously don't you start looking like those dogs? No, like the pug dog, like Stu's dog, your eyes pop out if you have a thyroid condition. If your eyes are popping out, that's why you're not having sex. But it also says because you might be anemic. I'm anemic, almost had to have a blood transfusion a couple of weeks ago and you know what? I could have had sex on the blood transfusion table. I'm just, I'm a guy. Anemia's going to stop you, puhleez. You need to have a blood transfusion." Sure, can you just leave us alone for a second, Doc? I mean, here are some other reasons. "You're ugly." Hello! I'm not a sex expert but I'm -- you know, I'm thinking, you know, you're ugly and, you know, that's a tough one to overcome especially if you're a woman. If you're a guy, that's not hard to overcome. I'm sorry. That's just the way the world is. How many ugly guys have hot wives? Take me, for example. I don't know why she married -- I think it was low self-esteem. I do. No, really I think it was low self-esteem. I got in -- you know, you buy when the market is low. You know what I mean? While everybody is selling, you buy. And I think I got in there right at the right time. Low self-esteem, wait a minute, could go a little lower, she might come down to my price. Okay, sold! Now her self-esteem is going up. And if my income wasn't going up, she would have ditched me long ago. She would have gone, "Wait a minute, I think I was depressed when I married you." I'm just -- look. I'm not Tania, but I am a thinker.

Okay, so anyway, talking about ugly people. Ugly people, if you're a guy, you can get past it. I don't think you can as an ugly woman. No, I don't -- if you are an ugly woman, I apologize. Oh, you've got a double-cross because if you're an ugly woman, you're probably a Progressive as well. Oh, jeez. I'm sorry. Today's just not your day. But you know what? If you believed in God, you would know that there's going to be another chance for you. You don't have to be ugly in heaven. You are going to be your perfect self and there will be another perfect somebody waiting for you on the other side. Until that time....

Reason Number 2, you're morbidly obese. They didn't cover this one in the other article, but I think when you put surprising -- oh, no, it does say "Surprising reasons you're not having sex." That's not a surprising reason. If you're morbidly obese, there's not a single person that's in line, you know, sitting on that big marshmallow couch, "I'm just going to have some more Cheetos. Ooh, this couch looks tasty." There's nobody that is sitting there eating Cheetos, "I got Cheetos dust all over my throat and thinking, why doesn't anybody want to have sex with me." That doesn't happen. There's no surprise there. You are right, I'm sorry, I take it back. The surprise would be, "I'm on my marshmallow -- you what? You want to have sex with me?" But again the guys make out better than the ladies on this one. Two words: Kevin James. I mean, he married a model. It's Kevin James! Look at him! I defy you to name the fat woman married to some stud guy. Can you do it?

Women are so much better than guys. They are. They just are. They will see -- I don't know how they see past fat. I don't, but they do somehow or another. My wife said to me last night. I said, oh, honey, I'm just tired of being fat and disgusting. I've got to get into shape. And she said, you're not fat. And I said, oh, I love you, my little blind one. You are so great. And by the way, you gain an ounce and you are out of here.

Reason number 3, you haven't done all the chores around the house. That's the one, that's the surprising reason you are not -- you've never tied it to chores! That women can talk about how they want to be romanced and, oh, look at you -- no, uh-uh. They just want you to get the chores done. That's it. It's like, you are like a hamster. And you got to put your nose in that little thing to get the water to come out. You know what I mean? That little thing, you got to get the chores done. You put the nose up in the little -- and the water comes. That's the way it works. You're a hamster! You've got to do the whole chore thing and I mean, men don't do the whole chore thing, there are very few times when men are not in the mood. The unfortunate thing for guys is one time when you're not in the mood is once you've finished all the chores. Because all day you're like, it's my whole Saturday is gone! I've been running around doing these darn chores! (Grumbling). Okay!

Reason Number 4: "You just bought that 63-inch plasma screen." I mean, honey, I love sex and everything, but have you seen how big the TV is? This is fantastic! Reason Number 5: "The ogle factor. We're guys. We're pathetic. We'll ogle a mannequin. Have you seen the Victoria's Secret's mannequins? They are so incredibly hot. You, like, drive by and you're like, don't look, don't look, don't look! It's a mannequin, for the love of Pete. We ogle the mannequins. I don't want to ogle mannequins. You just do. You're a guy! Women don't understand that. "How come you never look at me like all the women at the mall." "I don't know. Maybe because you're not made of paper mache. I don't know! Happy Valentine's Day! Oh!

The government of the Northern Territory of Australia is now running "mandatory supervised" COVID-19 quarantine facilities, and there are a lot of conflicting reports going around about what's really happening in these "camps." Are they internment camps, summer vacation spots, or something in between?

On "The Glenn Beck Program" Monday, Glenn and Producer Stu Burguiere discussed the case of 26-year-old Australian resident Hayley Hodgson, who detailed her experience at the Center of National Resilience in Howard Springs during a recent interview with UnHerd. They compared Hodgson's description of the Howard Springs facility to images of bikini-clad Australians in quarantine who appear to be on holiday at the same facility.

So, what's really going on with Australia's COVID quarantine facilities? Watch the video clip below to hear Glenn and Stu break down what we know so far:

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis, and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and, live the American dream.

Glenn Beck: Here's how YOU can fix the Great Reset's housing crisis

Photo by H. Armstrong Roberts/Retrofile/Getty Images

How's the housing market looking these days? Because under Build Back Better (aka the Great Reset), investors are grabbing up homes at a record pace.

On "The Glenn Beck Radio Program," Glenn discussed a recent Redfin News report, which shows that almost one in five homes sold in the U.S. during the third quarter of 2021 was purchased by an investment firm, and many are paying tens of thousands of dollars over the asking price.

"Think of that, one in every five homes that are sold are going to a big investment firm," Glenn said. "Investors bought more than 90,000 homes, totaling more than $63 billion, representing 18% of all homes sold in the quarter. The numbers broke all records."

"The same factors have pushed more Americans to rent, which also creates opportunities for investors, because investors typically turn the homes they purchase into rentals," he continued. "And now they can charge higher rents. Rent for single-family homes surged by more than 10% in the 12 months, through September. The fastest annual rent inflation in 16 years."

"And nearly 77% purchased were bought in an all-cash transaction," Glenn added. "That's not your average person. These investment firms, like BlackRock, are going in and buying entire neighborhoods. They are the people that come in, and say, 'I'll give you $70,000 over the asking price.' ... Now, why would investment firms think they will just be able to make money paying $70,000 over the asking price? What is it that they know, that you don't know? Could they know, as the Great Reset states, that by 2030, you will own nothing and you'll like it?"

Watch the video clip below to hear Glenn offer his thoughts on how you can solve the Great Reset's housing crisis:


Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

On "Glenn TV" Wednesday, Glenn Beck exposes the radical plan to flip the United States from capitalism to socialism and into a lawless nation. It's an old strategy that mirrors a communist Cold War playbook. The goal now, as it was then, is this: How do they get a revolution without all that civil war stuff? It’s a five-step plan, and we're deep into several of the main steps RIGHT NOW.

Our justice system has been infiltrated by woke leftists, and something called "the progressive prosecutor movement" is methodically transforming Main Street USA into Main Street Gotham City. We can see it all over the country in places like San Francisco, with the Waukesha massacre as a terrifying glimpse into more of what's coming. And the media? They're currently running interference in one of the largest misinformation operations in history.

It’s happening at the city, state, AND federal levels. And President Trump might be one of the biggest victims of them all, a fact that even Trump critic Joe Rogan has realized on the Russia collusion hoax: “No one is being held accountable!” That ends now, as Glenn calls on Americans to push back on the lies that keep us divided in a cold civil war.

Watch the full episode below:

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

A "one-world government" is being formed right now and it’s called the Great Reset, Glenn Beck said on the radio program Monday. And now, rebuild plans for the fire-damaged Notre Dame Cathedral hint at the formation of a global church, too.

In this clip, Glenn detailed plans for the iconic, 850-year-old church’s "woke" renovations that sound more like a 'politically correct Disneyland' complete with a "discovery trail," "emotional spaces," and 14 themed chapels.

"Notre Dame is now being built back better as a 'woke theme park' dedicated to environmentalism and social justice," Glenn explained.

"There will be several different chapels within, [for example] a chapel for social justice, and then chapel for environmental justice," he continued. "Which leads me to this point. The 'one-world government' is being formed, right now. One-world government. It is being formed and it's called The Great Reset."

Glenn went on to predict that one of the first steps in the direction of a one-world government will be a push for a global religion.

"I think we're seeing the first church now being dedicated to the new global religion — and it is social justice, environmental justice, and all this gobbledygook. We all know, it's not just wrong, it is dangerous. That's the first church, the cathedral of Notre Dame, in France, is the first global church. Mark my words. Christian, Jews, Muslims ... this global church will bring darkness unlike you've ever seen."

Watch the video clip from "The Glenn Beck Program" below:

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.