Glenn Beck: Thanks, Apple




From the Tour Blog...  


John Carney looking at his outdated iPhone while team prepares to go onstage.

GLENN: I personally would like to thank Apple and Steve Jobs. No, I mean, there's no sarcasm there. That's a heartfelt thank you, Apple and Steve Jobs. It is. They just released the all new improved iPhone 2 which is better than the one you bought two weeks ago for $600 and only costs $200. So I want to thank Apple. I don't know how these people stay in business. I really don't. Once a year they remind you, "Remember us? We're the company that just screwed you out of $400. Isn't that great? You came in and we've had these things sitting on the shelves for a while, with you we weren't going to tell you, sucker. Why would we do that?" It's like when you go in to buy a new car. You go in to buy a new car, you know the new one is coming out, right? Because they come out at the same time. You know if you're going to buy a car, you can get a discount by going in around the fall because the new ones are coming in. Not with Apple. Not with Apple. They will sit there. They will have them underneath the counter. They will be while they're talking to you, they will be unwrapping the boxes so they can put the price tag on them. Underneath the counter they are unwrapping it while they are looking you right straight in the eye going, "new one? No, I have no idea when that one's coming out, no, no, no, this one's so good, that's why we're charging you four times as much the list price." They do the opposite. But I want to thank them. I'm not being sarcastic. I want to thank them. I'm thankful that Apple exists, I'm thankful that Steve Jobs knows how to screw people, I mean to the wall, and I think that's I mean, in a way I am grateful. I mean, they let me enjoy my Apple iPhone for a year and then I lost it and they've let me enjoy this one for two weeks. So that's you know, they haven't rubbed in the new version yet. I mean, they will. They just started today. Usually they wait, you know, for good six weeks before they have the new version out and then, you know, you just spent a bajillion dollars on something that now is completely obsolete and when you go to the counter, you know, the genius bar, they are like, "You still have this one? That's crazy. I mean, you're not cool anymore, you know?" You feel pretty good with an Apple. You feel pretty good. You're like, yeah, yeah. And then some dork walks by and they look at you like, you have the iPhone 2.2724? Didn't you hear they've already come out with Version 2.2981 like two weeks ago? Hello, grandpa!

I think Apple is quite honestly the most amazing company on the planet and also the most frustrating company on the planet. They are amazing because the products that they create, truly revolutionary. MP3 player, no matter what it is, where it is, it's called an iPod. That's what it is. Frustrating because they screw you every step of the way. They know they've got a better version. Please, I really think that Apple, I think they they've already they start with the iPod 9 and they're like, how can we make this less impressive? And they take nine steps back and they are like, let's start them here. We'll eventually get to the 9. "No, we really won't get to the 9. Bill in the other room, he's got this new thing. Your finger turns into a phone. It's fantastic." They trick us into these fancy little commercials, you know, where the Apple logo is popping up and the cute little music playing behind. The only thing they do is not show you pictures of puppy dogs and you hear you know, you hear the music and you're like, oh, geez, it's stupid Apple again; I'm never going to fall for that wait a minute, hang on. What? Did he just move the Internet screen with his finger? Wow! Where can I get one of those!

I think they need to have counseling. I think they need to have you know the genius bar? They should have the genius couch or the not so genius couch for anybody who bought one, just go to the couch. "So we screwed you again, didn't we?" "Yeah." "How does that make you feel?" "Pretty crappy." "You're still going to buy stuff from us, aren't you?" "Yes." "How does that make you feel?" "Well, when I first get it, I feel cool. Then about 20 minutes later when you come out with a new version, I feel like a loser." "But you are." "I know, until I buy the new version."

I think that's what they should do. They should have some sort of a counseling couch right by the genius bar. I mean, you got time. While you're waiting in line for three hours at the genius bar first time I waited in line, I didn't know you had to go over to the computer and sign in. I didn't know that. I'm just waiting for them to say, "Next." Then I realized it didn't work that way and then I really felt stupid. Then I was looking for the couch. I'm like, I'm so stupid, I don't even know how to use their line. And then you stand there and you wait for a genius who's not a genius. He's like 12. And he you already well, I was going to say already thinks he's better than you. He already knows he's better than you. He's working at the genius bar. That's not too egotistical. He's working at the genius bar and he's like, "Hello, welcome to iPod. Welcome to Apple. Can I see your computer, please?" "Yeah." "Okay, I'll just listen to it here for a second. I'll tell you what's wrong, okay?" And he puts it up to his ear. Who fixes anything with their ear. I don't think anybody, they put it up to their ear and they listen. There's nothing happening. "Yeah, you're going to have to replace this." "Can you fix it?" "Oh, no. No, these really aren't made to be fixed." Maybe if you guys are such geniuses, maybe you should make them so they can be fixed. It's enough to drive anybody to insanity. I think marriages have collapsed while one spouse is just waiting there at the genius bar, waiting to be informed that he needs to restart his iPhone. I mean, it's and marriages collapse not only just because of the time you spent in line at the stupid Apple store. It's because of the story you tell when you come back. "Where were you? What took you so long?" "I was at the Apple store, honey. I mean, you know how long it takes there." (Murmuring). "Well, they tried to fix it and they couldn't." But they do have this new version there and it just seemed like " "You bought one, didn't you?" Do women actually buy anything Apple or is it just guys? Yeah, because they make the iPhone, like, with the little pink rubber thing? That's the dumbest thing I've ever these iPhones, they're little teeny they're little teeny computers. As soon as you drop one I've dropped mine before. When you drop it, isn't the first thing out of your mouth, "Oh, crap." You know it's not going to survive the fall. You'll be standing in line at the genius counter. "Just listening. Shhh. Did you drop it or something?" I know, I probably you guys didn't really, you didn't think that one through, did you? "No, because nobody's stupid to drop it. I mean, who would be that stupid to drop an iPhone? You paid $6,000 for it. The new one's coming out tom oops, shouldn't have told you that. Why don't you buy the $6,000 one today because the new one's definitely not coming out at $19.95 tomorrow and this one doubles as a plane." "Okay, thank you. Thank you to the genius over at Apple."

Everything comes down to the two Senate runoffs in Georgia. If we lose both races, we lose the country. Democrats know this and are pouring in millions to usher in a Marxist agenda.

As the Left tries to hide how radical the two candidates really are, Glenn takes us inside the Democrat war room to expose the wolf in pastor's clothing, Raphael Warnock, and America's Justin Trudeau, Jon Ossoff. Socialism, the Green New Deal, and "defund the police" are all on the table. And Glenn warns of what's to come if conservatives don't activate: Chuck Schumer will weaponize the Senate, and the radical Left will launch an all-out assault to ravage the Constitution.

Watch the full special below:

The election and its aftermath are the most important stories in America. That's why we're offering our most timely discount ever: $30 off a one-year subscription to BlazeTV with code "GLENN." With BlazeTV, you get the unvarnished truth from the most pro-America network in the country, free from Big Tech and MSM censors.

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) joined the "Glenn Beck Radio Program" to explain how mail-in ballots are typically disqualified during recounts at a far higher rate than in-person, Election Day ballots, and why this is "good news" for President Donald Trump's legal battle over the election.

"One of the things that gives the greatest cause for optimism is, this election ... there's a pretty marked disparity in terms of how the votes were distributed. On Election Day, with in-person voting, Donald Trump won a significant majority of the votes cast on in-person voting on Election Day. Of mail-in voting, Joe Biden won a significant majority of the votes cast early on mail-in voting," Cruz explained.

"Now, here's the good news: If you look historically to recounts, if you look historically to election litigation, the votes cast in person on Election Day tend to stand. It's sort of hard to screw that up. Those votes are generally legal, and they're not set aside. Mail-in votes historically have a much higher rate of rejection … when they're examined, there are a whole series of legal requirements that vary state by state, but mail-in votes consistently have a higher rate of rejection, which suggests that as these votes begin being examined and subjected to scrutiny, that you're going to see Joe Biden's vote tallies go down. That's a good thing," he added. "The challenge is, for President Trump to prevail, he's got to run the table. He's got to win, not just in one state but in several states. That makes it a lot harder to prevail in the litigation. I hope that he does so, but it is a real challenge and we shouldn't try to convince ourselves otherwise."

Watch the video clip below to catch more of the conversation:

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Fox News senior meteorologist Janice Dean is perhaps even more disgusted with New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo (D) for his coronavirus response than BlazeTV's Stu Burguiere (read what Stu has to say on the subject here), and for a good reason.

She lost both of her in-laws to COVID-19 in New York's nursing homes after Gov. Cuomo's infamous nursing home mandate, which Cuomo has since had scrubbed from the state's website and blamed everyone from the New York Post to nursing care workers to (every leftist's favorite scapegoat) President Donald Trump.

Janice joined Glenn and Stu on the "Glenn Beck Radio Program" Tuesday to ask why mainstream media is not holding Gov. Cuomo — who recently published a book about his leadership during the COVID-19 pandemic — accountable?

"I'm vocal because I have not seen the mainstream media ask these questions or demand accountability of their leaders. [Cuomo] really has been ruling with an iron fist, and every time he does get asked a question, he blames everybody else except the person that signed that order," Janice said.

"In my mind, he's profiting off the over 30 thousand New Yorkers, including my in-laws, that died by publishing a book on 'leadership' of New York," she added. "His order has helped kill thousands of relatives of New York state. And this is not political, Glenn. This is not about Republican or Democrat. My in-laws were registered Democrats. This is not about politics. This is about accountability for something that went wrong, and it's because of your [Cuomo's] leadership that we're put into this situation."

Watch the video excerpt from the show below:

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As America grows divided and afraid to disagree with the Democrats' woke plan for America, Megyn Kelly is ready to fight back for the truth. For nearly two decades, she navigated the volatile and broken world of the media. But as America leans on independent voices more than ever, she's breaking new ground with "The Megyn Kelly Show."

She joined the latest Glenn Beck Podcast to break down what's coming next after the election: Black Lives Matter is mainstream, leftists are making lists of Trump supporters, and the Hunter Biden scandal is on the back burner.

Megyn and Glenn reminisce about their cable news days (including her infamous run-in with then-presidential candidate Donald Trump) and to look into the chaotic and shady world of journalism and the growing entitlement it's bred. For example, many conservatives have been shocked by how Fox News handled the election.

Megyn defended Fox News, saying she believes Fox News' mission "is a good one," but also didn't hold back on hosts like Neil Cavuto, who cut off a White House briefing to fact check it — something she never would have done, even while covering President Obama.

Megyn also shared this insightful takeaway from her time at NBC: "Jane Fonda was an ass."

Watch the full podcast here:

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