Glenn Beck: Thanks, Apple




From the Tour Blog...  


John Carney looking at his outdated iPhone while team prepares to go onstage.

GLENN: I personally would like to thank Apple and Steve Jobs. No, I mean, there's no sarcasm there. That's a heartfelt thank you, Apple and Steve Jobs. It is. They just released the all new improved iPhone 2 which is better than the one you bought two weeks ago for $600 and only costs $200. So I want to thank Apple. I don't know how these people stay in business. I really don't. Once a year they remind you, "Remember us? We're the company that just screwed you out of $400. Isn't that great? You came in and we've had these things sitting on the shelves for a while, with you we weren't going to tell you, sucker. Why would we do that?" It's like when you go in to buy a new car. You go in to buy a new car, you know the new one is coming out, right? Because they come out at the same time. You know if you're going to buy a car, you can get a discount by going in around the fall because the new ones are coming in. Not with Apple. Not with Apple. They will sit there. They will have them underneath the counter. They will be while they're talking to you, they will be unwrapping the boxes so they can put the price tag on them. Underneath the counter they are unwrapping it while they are looking you right straight in the eye going, "new one? No, I have no idea when that one's coming out, no, no, no, this one's so good, that's why we're charging you four times as much the list price." They do the opposite. But I want to thank them. I'm not being sarcastic. I want to thank them. I'm thankful that Apple exists, I'm thankful that Steve Jobs knows how to screw people, I mean to the wall, and I think that's I mean, in a way I am grateful. I mean, they let me enjoy my Apple iPhone for a year and then I lost it and they've let me enjoy this one for two weeks. So that's you know, they haven't rubbed in the new version yet. I mean, they will. They just started today. Usually they wait, you know, for good six weeks before they have the new version out and then, you know, you just spent a bajillion dollars on something that now is completely obsolete and when you go to the counter, you know, the genius bar, they are like, "You still have this one? That's crazy. I mean, you're not cool anymore, you know?" You feel pretty good with an Apple. You feel pretty good. You're like, yeah, yeah. And then some dork walks by and they look at you like, you have the iPhone 2.2724? Didn't you hear they've already come out with Version 2.2981 like two weeks ago? Hello, grandpa!

I think Apple is quite honestly the most amazing company on the planet and also the most frustrating company on the planet. They are amazing because the products that they create, truly revolutionary. MP3 player, no matter what it is, where it is, it's called an iPod. That's what it is. Frustrating because they screw you every step of the way. They know they've got a better version. Please, I really think that Apple, I think they they've already they start with the iPod 9 and they're like, how can we make this less impressive? And they take nine steps back and they are like, let's start them here. We'll eventually get to the 9. "No, we really won't get to the 9. Bill in the other room, he's got this new thing. Your finger turns into a phone. It's fantastic." They trick us into these fancy little commercials, you know, where the Apple logo is popping up and the cute little music playing behind. The only thing they do is not show you pictures of puppy dogs and you hear you know, you hear the music and you're like, oh, geez, it's stupid Apple again; I'm never going to fall for that wait a minute, hang on. What? Did he just move the Internet screen with his finger? Wow! Where can I get one of those!

I think they need to have counseling. I think they need to have you know the genius bar? They should have the genius couch or the not so genius couch for anybody who bought one, just go to the couch. "So we screwed you again, didn't we?" "Yeah." "How does that make you feel?" "Pretty crappy." "You're still going to buy stuff from us, aren't you?" "Yes." "How does that make you feel?" "Well, when I first get it, I feel cool. Then about 20 minutes later when you come out with a new version, I feel like a loser." "But you are." "I know, until I buy the new version."

I think that's what they should do. They should have some sort of a counseling couch right by the genius bar. I mean, you got time. While you're waiting in line for three hours at the genius bar first time I waited in line, I didn't know you had to go over to the computer and sign in. I didn't know that. I'm just waiting for them to say, "Next." Then I realized it didn't work that way and then I really felt stupid. Then I was looking for the couch. I'm like, I'm so stupid, I don't even know how to use their line. And then you stand there and you wait for a genius who's not a genius. He's like 12. And he you already well, I was going to say already thinks he's better than you. He already knows he's better than you. He's working at the genius bar. That's not too egotistical. He's working at the genius bar and he's like, "Hello, welcome to iPod. Welcome to Apple. Can I see your computer, please?" "Yeah." "Okay, I'll just listen to it here for a second. I'll tell you what's wrong, okay?" And he puts it up to his ear. Who fixes anything with their ear. I don't think anybody, they put it up to their ear and they listen. There's nothing happening. "Yeah, you're going to have to replace this." "Can you fix it?" "Oh, no. No, these really aren't made to be fixed." Maybe if you guys are such geniuses, maybe you should make them so they can be fixed. It's enough to drive anybody to insanity. I think marriages have collapsed while one spouse is just waiting there at the genius bar, waiting to be informed that he needs to restart his iPhone. I mean, it's and marriages collapse not only just because of the time you spent in line at the stupid Apple store. It's because of the story you tell when you come back. "Where were you? What took you so long?" "I was at the Apple store, honey. I mean, you know how long it takes there." (Murmuring). "Well, they tried to fix it and they couldn't." But they do have this new version there and it just seemed like " "You bought one, didn't you?" Do women actually buy anything Apple or is it just guys? Yeah, because they make the iPhone, like, with the little pink rubber thing? That's the dumbest thing I've ever these iPhones, they're little teeny they're little teeny computers. As soon as you drop one I've dropped mine before. When you drop it, isn't the first thing out of your mouth, "Oh, crap." You know it's not going to survive the fall. You'll be standing in line at the genius counter. "Just listening. Shhh. Did you drop it or something?" I know, I probably you guys didn't really, you didn't think that one through, did you? "No, because nobody's stupid to drop it. I mean, who would be that stupid to drop an iPhone? You paid $6,000 for it. The new one's coming out tom oops, shouldn't have told you that. Why don't you buy the $6,000 one today because the new one's definitely not coming out at $19.95 tomorrow and this one doubles as a plane." "Okay, thank you. Thank you to the genius over at Apple."

The fall of Lehman Brothers in 2008 marked the largest bankruptcy filing in U.S. history and economic collapse was felt throughout the world. But now China's own version of Lehman Brothers, Evergrande, is teetering closer and closer to that edge, too. On the radio program Thursday, Glenn Beck gave the latest update and predicted how it will affect Asian markets and what it could mean for America's economy.

Glenn explained why he believes a major collapse that is happening now in China will have a cascading effect into a "controlled collapse," a managed decline that will dramatically change America's economy and the way we all live.

"You will not recognize your lifestyle. Hear me," Glenn warned. "And that's not a right-left thing. That's a right-wrong thing. We're on the wrong track. I'm telling you now, there's new information and you are not going to recognize the American lifestyle. ... It could happen tomorrow. It could happen in five years from now, but it will happen. We are headed for a very different country. One where you don't have the rights that you have. And you certainly don't have the economic privileges that Americans are used to."

"The same thing that happened in 2008 is now happening in China," Glenn continued. "This time, it's going to take everything down. When it collapses, it will take everything down."

Watch the video below to hear Glenn break down the details:

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Justin Haskins, editorial director of the Heartland Institute, joined Glenn Beck on the radio program to expose a shocking conversation between two Great Reset proponents — Klaus Schwab, chairman of the World Economic Forum, and Christine Lagarde, president of the European Central Bank (Europe's equivalent to the Fed).

The way Schwab and Lagarde discuss the role central banks should play in establishing societal norms, determining your way of life, and defending against potential crisis is proof that the Great Reset is upon us, Justin explained. And the scariest part is that they're not even trying to hide it. The entire, unbelievable conversation has been published on the WEF website, which you can read here.

Glenn read an excerpt from the conversation:

Christine Lagarde: At the ECB, we have now wrapped up and concluded our strategy review, which was the first one in 17 years. And I was blessed to have an entire Governing Council unanimously agree that the fight against climate change should be one of the considerations that we take when we determine monetary policy. So at least the European Central Bank is of the view that climate change is an important component in order to decide on monetary policy. ...

Can we arrive at that trade-off between fighting climate change, preserving biodiversity and yet securing enough growth to respond to legitimate demands of the population? And my first answer, Klaus, to be firm, is that to have a way of life, we need life. And in the medium term, we do have major threats on the horizon that could cause the death of hundreds of thousands of people. So we have to think life, first. We have to think way of life, second. ...

So we have to think life, first. We have to think way of life, second. How can we come together to make sure that we secure the first priority, which is life, and also protect the way of life that people have? And make sure that the cost of it is not so high for some people, that they just cannot tolerate it. I think that the trade-off that we reach will probably require some redistribution, because it is clear that the most exposed people, the less privileged people are those that are going to need some help.

"Do you understand, America, what that means?" Glenn exclaimed. "You have elites, that you never elected, that are having these meetings ... deciding what is a legitimate need for you. And telling you that your needs are going to go away in your lifetime. You may not see a time where you get wants again. Just your needs are going to be addressed. Am I reading this wrong?"

"This is absolutely what is being said here," Justin agreed. "She's very clear that we need to make sure that way of life is second to life. We have to save all these people, hundreds of thousands of people are going to die from this supposedly existential threat of climate change. And their wants, and their desires, and their quality of living, all of that has to come second."

"This is a central bank saying this. This is not an elected official, who is accountable directly to the people. This is a central bank saying, we're going to print money. We're going to use monetary policy, to impose these ideas, to rework society in order to accomplish our goals," Justin added, addressing Lagarde's call for "some redistribution."

Will Great Reset elites — not elected by the U.S. — soon be dictating to the rest of the world? Watch the video clip below to hear Glenn and Justin break it down:

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First comes the "crisis," then comes the expansion. The federal government is seizing on the January 6 Capitol riot to take carte blanche to do whatever it wants and weaponize the event to further empower the new overlords of our country — the intelligence community.

On Glenn TV Wednesday, Glenn Beck reveals what's happening with the U.S. Capitol Police and argues they've morphed into a new arm of the intelligence apparatus, boosted by a massive increase in funding and surveillance equipment and new offices OUTSIDE the Capitol building. The Biden administration has also hidden basic details regarding January 6. Why did officials refuse to release the name of the officer who killed Ashli Babbitt? Where are the 14,000-plus hours of CCTV footage? As any intelligence organization knows, it's best to operate outside the realms of oversight.

Glenn exposes the hidden hand of government that could be used to punish and destroy innocent Americans who are only guilty of holding the "wrong" political view.

Watch the full episode of "Glenn TV" below:

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The conditions in Afghanistan under the Taliban rule — for Americans, allies, Christians, women and more — continue to deteriorate, and the people there continue to plead that we will not forget them. On the radio program Monday, Glenn Beck gave an emotional update on current evacuation efforts, including the tragic story of one girl — an American passport holder — who was not rescued in time.

"I have a pit in my stomach like I haven't had in a while. What is happening in Afghanistan is both miraculous and horrendous," Glenn began. "What's going on right now one of the most amazing things I've ever personally witnessed — the evacuation of Americans, those [Afghans] who helped us, Christians that are dying, women that are under incredible conditions. I see things that I can't show you. I see the pleadings from people who are in safe houses, 'Please, don't forget us.' I see what they're being sent by the Taliban.

"If I die today, my entire life will have been worth it for what you have helped get done, in just the last three weeks. You have saved well over 5,000 people," he continued.

Fighting back tears, Glenn added, "I ask that you pray for those in the Middle East, that are in the midst of doing work, that a Moses-style miracle will happen. ... There are several people that are in dire need of medical care. Friday, we told you — along with the congressman from Oklahoma [Rep. Markwayne Mullin] who had just returned — [about] a father and two daughters that were blue passport Americans, and a mother who had a permanent residence, a Green Card. The daughter was very ill. And they thought, that if we couldn't get her out of there, that she would lose her legs. I got a call on Saturday morning, that we were too late, that she didn't lose her legs. She lost her life, waiting. There are now two Americans, instead of three."

Glenn showered his audience with gratitude, repeating that "well over 5000" lives have already been saved because of their incredible generosity, but lamented that there are still thousands more people yet to be saved.

Watch the video clip below to hear more updates from Glenn:

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To donate to these rescue efforts, visit NazareneFund.org or MercuryOne.org.

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.