Just when Obama was starting to run out of things to say about Republicans, Sheriff Joe Arpaio decides to come out and launch a big investigation into Barack Obama’s birth certificate. Why he decided to bring this ridiculous issue, one that only gives Obama an opportunity to call the right (justifiably so, in this case) ‘crazy’ – is beyond explanation. But, he’s doing it anyway.
“Okay. Look, I am a fan of Sheriff Joe Arpaio. I am a guy who has supported him in the past. I like him, I… I think he’s great on illegal immigration. But Joe, have you gone nuts?” Glenn said as he opened the show.
The birth certificate has long been a tool of the Obama administration to distract people from real issues, like inflation, and to paint the Tea Party as racist and insane. Most of the outcry over the birth certificate had died down after Donald Trump faded into the background of the latest The Apprentice season and Obama releasing a copy of the birth certificate. Sadly, Sherrif Arpaio had to bring it up again.
Glenn treated the whole thing as a joke, presenting some wild theories of his own. Could the Obama administration have presented a forgery only to leave the real one in a vault just to screw with people? Or could he be the grandson of Sally Hemmings and Kruschev?
Even though Stu was really, really , really sick of having to talk about the “birther” issue on air once again, Glenn felt like he had to explain why it’s such a ridiculous story.
“Here’s the thing. You have two newspapers that ran the birth announcement,” Glenn said.
“Which is more likely that he was, he was a Soviet plant from birth? Because really that’s what has to happen to be able to have the 1962 records in the newspaper,” Glenn said.
“Now really? Are we going to the place to where they knew from birth that this guy was going to be President of the United States? Which is more likely? That they knew from birth or the President of the United States and his minions are so good at what they do and they’re taking just great joy and glee and delight in holding that birth certificate back as long as they possibly can, not answering, just to make everybody look like crazy Birthers and then seriously,” Glenn said.
Stu, obviously frustrated, said, “The thing is that the Obama administration actually has conversations like this: Imagine if we didn’t have to justify any of our economic failures and we could just talk about whether or not I was born here? That’s the conversation they have.”
“There is one person on Earth, one, one person on Earth that I am more sure about his citizenship in the United States than Barack Obama, one. His name is Zachary Burguiere. He’s my son. I was there for his birth. Including myself. I have more evidence that he, Barack Obama, was born in America,” Stu said.
Stu’s frustration comes from the fact that every time someone brings up the birth certificate, he’s the one assigned the job of looking into whatever arguments are being created to say Barack Obama was not born in the United States.
“About 80% of my pay I believe comes from the fact that you torture me with this stupid story,” Stu lamented.
When Obama released his birth certificate last year, Stu released a “real” birth certificate lampooning some of the ridiculous theories: