North Korea’s shocking find: Ancient Unicorn Lair

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It’s hard to believe it’s taken this long for someone to find it – but North Korean state media has announced it’s scientists have discovered an ancient unicorn lair. How do they know? Because it says so right on the sign at the entrance – ancient unicorn lair. Duh.

“You know, a lot of people are talking about Hamas wanting to seek removal from the terror list or the fiscal cliff or whatever, but I think we start with the big news here, that North Korean archeologists have discovered an ancient unicorn lair,” Glenn said this morning.

The Korean Central News Agency has reported:

 Archaeologists of the History Institute of the DPRK Academy of Social Sciences have recently reconfirmed a lair of the unicorn rode by King Tongmyong, founder of the Koguryo Kingdom (B.C. 277-A.D. 668).

The lair is located 200 meters from the Yongmyong Temple in Moran Hill in Pyongyang City. A rectangular rock carved with words “Unicorn Lair” stands in front of the lair. The carved words are believed to date back to the period of Koryo Kingdom (918-1392).

Jo Hui Sung, director of the Institute, told KCNA:

“Korea’s history books deal with the unicorn, considered to be ridden by King Tongmyong, and its lair.

Yes, the state news agency has reported an ancient king once rode a unicorn – and now they found his home.

“Wow the archeologists found this unicorn lair was they found right there just outside of the city a rectangular rock by the cave which was conveniently carved with the words ‘unicorn lair.’” Glenn said.

“As ridiculous as it seems, this is what happens when you have a Communist or Marxist country.  What happens is your media goes so far awry for so long and your people become so uninformed that they actually start to believe in unicorns again.  Now, how far are we?  How many years down the road are we before somebody is teaching our kids about unicorns and they believe it?” Glenn said.

  • http://www.artinphoenix.com/gallery/grimm snowleopard (cat folk gallery)

    Welcome to the future of America, and I give it less than two years given the trend beginning among the left-MSM for the deification of Obama as a god-king. The cult-of-Obama is rising, and soon he will be made Emperor.

    When that happens the choice will be simple – worship or death.

  • landofaahs

    Yea and that Kimdumbilk shithead is the sexiest man alive…Who’d they ask?  Barney Frank?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000320709865 Chris Moss

    I’m pretty sure the bible mentions unicorns! ( So I’m assuming, some sort of creature like this existed). Not to say that the words”Unicorn Lair” aren’t conveniently placed though!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=678584483 Lori Chauvette Ingham

    Well, to be fair, unicorns do exist — they’re a non magical breed of horse that has a mutation that causes a horn on their head.  They are INCREDIBLY rare.

    With that being said, I’ve been saying since Obama’s been elected that I’m still waiting for my unicorn that farts rainbows.

  • Kev50027

    How dare you pretend unicorns don’t exist!  Obama was elected while riding on one, don’t you remember?!?

  • Kev50027

    The Bible also mentions how the earth is flat and people lived hundreds of years… so there’s that.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1017028020 Brenda Mobley-Gibbs

    Death please.

  • rtalbott7

    And yet they refuse to believe the Holocost…..!

  • http://www.facebook.com/johnny.sparks.1612 Johnny Sparks

    Unicons are real creatures of the past,,as were dinosaurs you have
    no evidence they don’t exist ..  
    and plenty of myth to back it up.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1490437484 Max Wellbrock-Talley

    That’s actually only partially true. The failure of the media isn’t a characteristic of Marxism, but it is of Marxism-Leninism. Any time you see a Communist Party talking vanguards, revolutions, and “democratic centralism,” you know that said party is dangerous and that it aspires to be Stalin’s USSR, Mao’s PRC, or Kim’s DPRK. Even the CPUSA is guilty of that.

  • http://www.facebook.com/brooke.towns1 Brooke Towns

    The unicorn in the Bible is actually an ox. Just so you know :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    Stop being so sarcastic, Glenn. You have to be a complete IDIOT if you don’t believe in unicorns… And if the sign said “Unicorn Lair”, then it’s gotta be the lair of the unicorn! It can’t be a “bear” lair, or a “cougar” lair, or even Batman’s lair, or any other lair since the words on the rock explicitly state “Unicorn Lair”…. Of course it’s the unicorn’s lair. Get it with it Glenn!

    (Okay, now I know people can’t read sarcasm sometimes, so I have to break character now and tell everyone, yes, I am being sarcastic!)

    God’s love!

    -Travis

  • tomcat

    this is why they should be da NEW home of the UNITED NATIONS.  nothing more be said

  • http://youtu.be/ff8jDkOHp3U Sam Fisher

    The Bible never said the earth was flat idiot. “How you have
    helped him who has no power! How you have saved the arm that has no strength!
    How you have counseled him who has no wisdom, and plentifully declared sound
    knowledge! With whose help have you uttered words, and whose breath has come
    out from you? The dead tremble under the waters and their inhabitants. Sheol is
    naked before God, and Abaddon has no covering. He stretches out the north over
    the void and hangs the earth on nothing. He binds up the waters in his thick
    clouds, and the cloud is not split open under them. He covers the face of the
    full moon and spreads over it his cloud. He has inscribed a circle on the face
    of the waters at the boundary between light and darkness. The pillars of heaven
    tremble and are astounded at his rebuke. By his power he stilled the sea; by
    his understanding he shattered Rahab. By his wind the heavens were made fair;
    his hand pierced the fleeing serpent. Behold, these are but the outskirts of
    his ways, and how small a whisper do we hear of him!  But the thunder of his power who can
    understand?”

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    What Holocaust? You mean that thing made up by an entire generation of people at the start of WWII? Come one… WWII never happened either! It was made up to squander benefits for so-called veterans from the government and give these “veterans” their own holiday. There’s no such thing as veterans either… ;) … Unicorns though is serious business.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    I totally agree. There might be no proof of Atlas, but I’m pretty sure I just saw his armpit over London last year… Pretty sure. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/kevin.dedes Kevin Dedes

    Oh man! Now the North Koreans are going to use the awesome power of unicorn magic to turn everyone gay, or kill those who won’t convert with death panels before making us all stand in breadlines and speak Russian! 

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    Where does the Bible say the earth is flat? Thanks =)

  • http://www.facebook.com/jeremy.yoho Jeremy Yoho

    The Unicorn Lair in Korea is a horribly blatant piece of misinformation shoved down the throat of a largely ignorant populace It is an awful thing to hoax your own country in this way. I feel that now would be an appropriate time to point out that we live in a society that largely believes in talking snakes and virgins who become impregnated through supernatural means.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    I’m very happy we are finally focusing on the important things that are occurring around the world instead of being so hung up on Iranian nukes and the pending demise of Israel.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    In all honestly, I believe the unicorn story more than I believe the American debt-reduction story.

  • http://youtu.be/ff8jDkOHp3U Sam Fisher

    Sad thing is they have nukes. I also heard the North Korea Unicorn Lair was found by Al Gore. He was studying how global warming wipe the unicorn out. I think he was also looking for man bear pig as well.

  • http://youtu.be/ff8jDkOHp3U Sam Fisher

    Just put a screen door over it and no one will even notice. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    I’m pretty sure he was riding an ass. And the story on PMSNBC showed him healing the sick, giving sight to the blind, and handing out Obama phones.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Catholic1Net Travis John Paul

    Pretty sure ManBearPig is in Washington… Cow flatulence killed the unicorn. Or Sarah Palin. Hey liberals, let’s blame Sarah Palin for killing all the unicorns!

  • Anonymous

    Actually it says the world is round, the way God created it. Is;40:22 (the word circle is from the hebrew word used for orb), 

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/HEJWAU3VTK3IX67PBSS3BPJSZY James Mcdermott

    I love you
    lol

  • Anonymous

    I love just how this conversation derailed.  So great.

  • mudslide

    Tell a lie long enough it eventually becomes the truth. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Victor-Barney/100000502045724 Victor Barney

    Revelations gives u.s. 3 1/2 YEARS! Just saying….

  • agadofive.leti

    Not!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_FF5PDJLI6BBYLYMZECK6ZTIVIY Speak2Truth

    Oh, we’re already there. Have you seen the video of the people “crying for the trees” or all those woo-woos believing in the power of crystals?  

  • http://www.facebook.com/MelanieHere Melanie Edman-Osmer

    We’re already there, Glenn, we’re already there…

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/John-Whittington/100001496682673 John Whittington

    Wasn’t that the time period that the Scientists believe that we were still hearing our brains left hemisphere and our right hemisphere talking to each other?

  • captkirk

     Is that rainbows or Skittles?

  • Bubba Gump

    I would believe the unicorn story before I’d believe Barry is a US born citizen

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/John-Whittington/100001496682673 John Whittington

    You’re living in a dream world also!!!

  • Anonymous

    The existence of Unicorns and other aberrations is Biblically sound. When the Nephilim was cast out of Heaven down to this fallen Planet by our Creator they fraternized with all of the species on this planet in hopes of destroying the Lineage that would give birth to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The Fallen Angels’ interactions with earth’s species created Unicorns, Mermaids, Centars, Pinitars, Cyclopse, and many of the mythical beasts of old. This corruption of the species so distressed our Lord he brought Noah’s Flood that has been chronicled in over 230 ancient religions of our world. Those agents of darkness still inhabit this planet and they know their time is short. SO, when they come to give you the mark of the beast, YOU MUST RESIST. In the mean time, I know a place where they have the Largest Ball of Yarn!

  • Anonymous

    It’s already here. When a president can lie about killing his own people, such as Benghazi, and the media fully support him, the brainwashing has already begun. Pretty soon, the US constitution will be totally ignored and a new US will begin with Obama at its head. Just wait and see what happens in the next four years.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/KVBNO3DZYMUOZIKK65G5ZMF4BY Banty

    “No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Mark 13:32

  • http://www.facebook.com/bruce.macomber Bruce Macomber

    What… no Pegasus?

  • http://www.facebook.com/williame.ramer William E Ramer

    All hail YOHO Jerry, who’s daddy put a handful of nothing into a tumbler made of nothing, let it run for 5 trillion years, and out poped  the eternal infernal YOHO.

  • Anonymous

    What’s worse is they’ll be telling everyone that our “Lord and Savior” Barrack Hussein Obama rode one during the Obama dynasty (2008-date yet to be determined…..science hasn’t been able to figure out yet when this fraud or anyone else for that matter will die).

  • Anonymous

    That’s because it never started off as a serious conversation.  How could it?

  • Anonymous

    Aren’t enchanted mushrooms legal in North Korea?  That is no doubt what led Gore to his discovery.

  • http://www.facebook.com/SIGNMAN01 Kenny Daniels

    I AVE READ BEFORE IN THE BIBLE IT TALKS ABOUT UNICORNS ND DRAGONS

  • http://www.facebook.com/CommonSenseAZ Arizona Sense

    Hell with that, I will infiltrate the organization and climb as high as a can then go on a rampage and take out as many of them as possible.

  • Anonymous

    Totally believable, I’ve found the “missing links”on the network news stations.

  • Anonymous

    so if unicorns now truly exsist, does that meen that millionairs that creat jobs accually exsist now to O_o just saying. Sen. Reed may want to rethink things now. :)

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/NT3EBVXEJ7NYTS4QBGAZPZZUTA Roger

    Of course it had a rectangular sign by the door. How else would it get it’s mail? Duh!

  • Anonymous

    Oh, so you’re a terrorist…or do you prefer Nazi? Can’t live with a democratic vote, so want to go on a rampage?

  • Anonymous

    What’s funny is how many of the people reading this site would absolutely believe it if Beck, or Limbaugh or Levin, “reported” it. 

  • Anonymous

    @jaamuse: U sir are the mind numbed robot if U truly believe that :)

  • Draxx

    Obummer will ride his unicorn, but I do not believe it would be on the back of the unicorn (maybe his own eunic-horn…lol).

  • Anonymous

    Our kids will be taught how King Obama rode a unicorn…or something. Some of the things the media is reporting here are less believable than a unicorn lair. 

  • http://twitter.com/KarenGossage Karen Gossage

    I will infiltrate the organization and climb as high as a can then go on a rampage and take out as many of them as possible. http://www.youtube.qr.net/jOUs/watch?v=9xOf6Pe0ETk

  • Anonymous

     that’s revelation buddy,no plural

  • Anonymous

    This is just silly.  Everyone who knows anything about unicorns knows that they, as imaginary members of the equine species, live in corrals not lairs. 

  • Anonymous

    A new show for Animal Planet.  Since we have fun out of episodes on Finding Bigfoot,  we can replace it with Finding Unicorns!  And then we can travel to the wonderful progressive country of North Korea and see how wonderful the future United Soviet States of America will be!

  • greywolfrs

    I guess it is time to start taking bets on what country has the Pegasus lair…

  • http://twitter.com/paoligarcy Paolina

     Hitler was elected by a democratic vote.

    Interestingly, only the monarchists were willing to take violent action against Hitler. The liberal and conservative parties decided to either wait him out or even more foolishly to try to vote him out which was basically identifying yourself as a potential dissident.

    It’s arguable at a certain point in government, democracy creates complacency and encourages support for dictators so long as they maintain the facade of voting.

  • Anonymous

    Ah, the joys of ignorance or communism if one prefers. If the truth hurts then believe the lie.

  • Anonymous

    First they eat the skittles, then come the rainbows. Much like Obama’s promises.

  • Rob Best

    Heck, almost as bad as the people who believe a preacher died, rose from dead and will someday come and “save us all”.

  • Anonymous

    about as believable as teaching kids Santa is bringing you presents

  • Anonymous

    The Book Of Revelation….singular b/t/w.. the ‘revelation’ is who Jesus Christ is, & not only referring to the end time prophecies revealed and documented by John the revelator. We probably have longer than 3 1/2 years to wait for The Church to be taken out of this world…which kinda sux some days.. 

  • Ken Graham

    Num_23:22God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn.
     

    Num_24:8God brought him forth out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn: he shall eat up the nations his enemies, and shall break their bones, and pierce them through with his arrows.
     

    Job_39:9Will the unicorn be willing to serve thee, or abide by thy crib?
     

    Job_39:10Canst thou bind the unicorn with his band in the furrow? or will he harrow the valleys after thee?
     

    Psa_29:6He maketh them also to skip like a calf; Lebanon and Sirion like a young unicorn.
     

    Psa_92:10But my horn shalt thou exalt like the horn of an unicorn: I shall be anointed with fresh oil.

  • Mike Stanley

    What kind of “News” agency is this, anyway? No video? Not even a photo? North Korea bites.   hahaha
    Oh, wait. 
    “Ancient Aliens.” 
    “Alien UFOs” 
    “Mayan Calendar”
    “NASA never landed on the Moon”
    “Fiscal Cliff”
    “Obama-mania”
    “The 99 percent”

    maybe we’re already IN North Korea…..

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=553964551 Michael Chambers

    According to the Bible, unicorns either did exist or still do (is Isaiah 34:7 a glimpse of the future?)…

    Numbers 23:22 – God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn.

    Numbers 24:8 – God brought him forth out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn: he shall eat up the nations his enemies, and shall break their bones, and pierce them through with his arrows.

    Deuteronomy 33:17 – His glory is like the firstling of his bullock, and his horns are like the horns of unicorns: with them he shall push the people together to the ends of the earth:
    and they are the ten thousands of Ephraim, and they are the thousands of Manasseh.

    Job 39:9 – Will the unicorn be willing to serve thee, or abide by thy crib?

    Job 39:10 – Canst thou bind the unicorn with his band in the furrow? or will he harrow the valleys after thee?

    Psalm 22:21 – Save me from the lion’s mouth: for thou hast heard me from the horns of the unicorns.

    Psalm 29:6 – He maketh them also to skip like a calf; Lebanon and Sirion like a young unicorn.

    Psalm 92:10 – But my horn shalt thou exalt like the horn of an unicorn: I shall be anointed with fresh oil.

    Isaiah 34:7 – And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness.