Epic Beck monologue: "Man up!"

December 12, 2013

Writer

Oh, how far we’ve come since the days of America’s earliest pioneers-in the wrong direction. Last night on TV Glenn lamented the state of resolve and determination in America today and ripped our overall lack of toughness. Below is the stunning THEN vs. NOW comparison from Glenn’s monologue which makes clear the pioneers are probably rolling over in their graves.

Hello, America, and welcome to The Glenn Beck Program and to TheBlaze. This is the network that you are building. And it is time to man up. No, really, seriously. I mean, the sensitivity binge was super fun while it lasted. It was, but enough is enough. If America’s success makes other countries feel bad, sucks to be them. If you’re worried about income inequality, or if you’re offended by a Nativity scene or scared of a Pop Tart gun, I don’t care, not at all. Man up. Time to man up.

This is a nation whose heritage goes back to people who climbed into a boat. They didn’t want to. They went sailing off into the vast sea having no idea where they’d end up, even if they would get there. Half of them died, and the half that lived, you know, to make the trip, they were afraid they were going to be eaten by the Indians. Man up.

This is the country that fought the British, broken, hungry, barefoot, in the dead of winter. Martha Washington came to like make people shirts because they didn’t have pants and shirts, and yet, somehow or another we won. We are the country that tamed the West. Pioneers packed up their families, their belongings into wagons, rode off into the great West, into the unknown. Weird, they took all of their crap, put it in a box, tied it to a horse, and crossed the mountains, no roads, no GPS, no weather forecast from the weather Channel, no grocery stores. No, not even a rest stop.

But there were areas where we could stop and take pictures, right? No, nothing, nothing, just grit, determination. That’s what they had. Everything else, they were crapping in the woods and wiping themselves with leaves. Imagine that. Now, imagine what those people would say about us today and our toughness and our resolve. The people who survived the Dust Bowl, you know them, they starved because their farms were buried in dirt. Apparently too much dirt is a bad thing. What would they say about us?

Today, I actually received in the middle of the radio show an e-mail from the Snow and Ice Management Association – who knew that even existed – giving me the top ten tips for walking in the snow. They thought that I should bring you that news. I’m not going to, because if you’re not smart enough to figure out how to walk in the snow – one of their tips was look down. Another one of their tips, I’m not making it up, was look up.

If you’re not smart enough to figure that out by yourself, I want you to freeze to death in the snow. I just, I do. Now, if there’s something psychologically wrong with you, I want to help you so we get you inside, but if you’re perfectly normal, just dumb enough to go outside without shoes or socks or a coat, and you have no idea how to walk in snow, and you’re 30 years old, I hope you freeze to death. And I say that with all the best part of my Christian heart that is currently working today.

We are a country that is snowed in for two days, and panic begins to settle in. And the guys on television snow crisis, 2013, we’ll all remember where we were when we couldn’t make it to Starbucks by the end of the day. I just can’t survive another minute without my café grande crappuccino. Who set sail on the ocean blue? Well, not me. That sounds scary, but it does sound like a nice color blue. Could we get some accessories with it? No.

This is how wimpy we have become: There was a woman who tried to get onto a plane with a stuffed sock monkey. The monkey had a two-inch gun. TSA stopped her because that shouldn’t be allowed on a plane. Now, may I just say to you, if your sock monkey happens to be this big, and the gun looks like this, maybe we have the TSA take the gun from you, but if your sock monkey looks like that sock monkey, you’re a freak, and it’s time to man up.

May I just say…what, you don’t have a sock monkey under your desk? I don’t want to scare anybody. I don’t want to scare anybody. I made this myself. I was talking about making these for Christmas and selling them online, but everybody in the office says the people will be too scared. It’s an underwear cat. I made this today. It’s just made out of underwear, okay?

It’s like a sock monkey, except this one has a lasso or a noose. I don’t know if you could travel with this on the plane or not, because it’s an underwear cat, and we’ve already learned people should be very afraid of a sock monkey. They’ve never seen my noose-carrying underwear cat.

We are a nation terrified of sock monkeys with a gun. Oh, and something else, Jesus. Apparently I have to report to you today that Christmas is not the most wonderful time of the year. It is apparently now the scariest time of the year. Disney now is eliminating Jesus from Christmas. Isn’t the first part of the word Christmas his title? Pretty sure.

They didn’t want to mention Christ in a Christmas show because it might offend somebody. Well actually, that’s the non-bull crap answer. Their bull crap answer is they’re just trying to cut it out for time. I saw this show. I saw this show last year. The narration, this is how politically correct it was, the narration was read by Marlee Matlin, except she didn’t say it, she signed it.

You could cut a lot of things out of a Christmas show, but I don’t think that you would cut out the Christ part of that, because that’s the whole story. And so they wanted to cut I think it was like 200 words out of it, and it was just all the stuff about, you know, he came, he was born, he conquered, and he rose again. Okay, alright, that’s good stuff. That’s good stuff, and they did it because they had to cut out what, two minutes? Really? Because I’ve stood in their really long obnoxious lines, you know? I don’t think they care about two minutes.

Wimpy factor number 432, two little girls just got booted from a grocery store in Vancouver, Washington, because, think of this, they wanted to sing Christmas carols and give a warm “fuzzy feeling to anyone who walked by.” Are you kidding me, higgledy-piggledy singing songs about Christmas? They were told, thank goodness, by store officials they might offend someone.

But thank goodness we at least have the brave men and women running our military. Oh sorry, they just caved too. They shut down a Nativity scene at Shaw Air Force Base in Sumter, South Carolina, because a group of atheists allegedly complained about it. They had a call. We have a call, somebody’s offended by the sleigh. Oh, sucks to be them.

Could I just ask the people at the Air Force, I mean, you’re this scared over a Nativity scene? Can I tell you something? You are going to be freaking out when you’re like in the plane upside down. Have you watched Top Gun? Because that looks scary.

Maybe a few people in our country need to talk to Deborah Sampson for a little inspiration. She is a woman who disguised herself as a man in order to fight with the Continental Army and George Washington. After getting wounded in the battle, she went home, of course, and cried – boo hoo, I hurt so bad. No, she didn’t. She operated on herself, and she removed one of the several musket balls out of her thigh with a pen knife. And then she sewed herself up with a sewing needle.

And then she went home and cried and recovered for a while. No, she didn’t. Then she got off her butt, and she went back into the battlefield and continued to fight. You think she’s going to curl up in the fetal position and cry herself to sleep because there’s a Nativity scene on base? Man up, man up.

I know this isn’t the monologue that Jesus would do, but as my wife usually points out, I’m not Jesus. This isn’t the monologue that Gandhi would do. I don’t think it’s the monologue that George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, I don’t even know if it’s the monologue Charlie Manson would do. I don’t really care. This is the monologue I’m doing today.

I really want to be a better man, but part of that is actually coming to the table, I think, and saying, “Man up.” Stop worrying about offending people, because it’s crippling us, even from interacting on the most basic of levels. A six-year-old boy was suspended after kissing a classmate on the hand. Do you know a woman, any woman here on the set, anybody, just shout your name out if you’re offended if a guy would come up, or a six-year-old kid would come up to you and take your hand and kiss your hand and say, “So nice to meet you.”

If this kid is…is there a soul in the control room, on the floor, anybody, any women? Here’s what happened. He goes, and he kisses a six-year-old girl on the hand because they’re friends. She doesn’t care. She thinks they’re boyfriend and girlfriend. Mom of the girl doesn’t care. Mom of the boy doesn’t care, but the school cares, so they suspended him. Now sexual harassment, and it will live on his record permanently. Don’t you have to know what sex is to be charged with sexual harassment?

Because he kissed a girl on the hand…I’m sorry, but I don’t know of a woman that doesn’t think that that’s cute or if honestly, I mean, me, if I did it, they’d think it was weird, but if somebody came up to them and said, “Madame, it is an honor to meet you,” took the hand and gently kissed it appropriately, are you kidding me? I would look at that guy and go, “I want to just stab you to death,” but my wife would be like, “See, that’s what a man is really like.” Right?

But we have so few examples. I showed you yesterday the selfie of the president. Oh, here he is at a funeral taking selfies, funeral selfies. By the way, that’s not the only thing. I don’t know if you saw the reports today on TheBlaze about the papers in New York, but apparently Michelle wasn’t too happy because he was laughing and flirting it up with the attractive Danish Prime Minister right there in front of his wife.

Can I tell you something? I saw this picture. My wife would look exactly like that. If I were doing that, my wife, she would have hit me. She would have. I am an abuse man. She would have done one of these. She does it all the time – poof!. I’m like, ouch! Okay? This is what’s happening. Look at this. See, this is the other side of being man that is ignored, the six-year-old gets, but we don’t get, chivalry, decency.

He then, he takes this picture, and then he shakes hands and is all smiles with a ruthless dictator who ironically has been imprisoning political opponents without cause, exactly what happened to Nelson Mandela. No icy stare here between these two, huh uh. No straight talk, no hard truths, just propaganda coup for a Cuban dictator, same thing he did for Hugo Chavez. It’s a big show. It’s a big show, and it’s all about him.

Even the interpreter of this, think of this one, the interpreter was a fraud. Is there anything real in the world anymore? The interpreter at Nelson Mandela’s funeral was signing random things that meant absolutely nothing, just making it up. How in the world does that happen? Does anybody ask any questions? Does anybody still lead? Does one person know how to behave? I don’t think so.

Well, no, I’m sorry, I take that back. One person knows how to behave and how to act like a man. Ted Cruz got up and walked out, quietly, dignified manner, but walked out when Castro spoke. But he’s one of the few, and he’s humiliated by the press. I am a guy who if you’ve been listening to me since I started doing talk radio, you listened to me in 2000. And in 2000, I was a wreck, and I was a shell of a man who I am today.

And I think I hopefully will be a shell of a man today of who I will be in ten years. I wasn’t a guy who knew how to behave, how to lead, do nothing, nothing. Because we live in a society where we skated, and then we were told to teach our children that everybody should get a trophy. And then we pampered ourselves and them with the comforts of modern society.

You know why we watch, can I tell you honestly? And maybe you’re better than me, but why do you watch the TV shows that you do and dismiss them and say hey, it’s okay if the kids watch this? Why? Why do you do that? You only do it because you want to watch something better yourself. You want to see it on TV. You’re like, oh they understand. Oh, bull crap, you want to do it. And I say that because I know me, not you. I know me.

We look for the easy way, and then we’re told we can’t say or do things that might offend somebody because everybody’s too weak. Our society has taught men to shut up, to get in line, to follow, to be quiet because, you know, you’ll cause trouble. Well, let me tell you something, and I say this kindly and nicely, if you are easily offended, do yourself a favor, unsubscribe from this network and go complain to someone who cares, because I don’t. I don’t.

You’re going to be offended and not just because I’m trying to do offensive things, but because that’s part of life. I’m offended. I watch things, and I’m offended. I watch things, and you know, my wife’s not offended, but I am. Okay, we all are offended by different things. Time to man up.

Critical theory destroys truth and justice

Editor's note: This article was originally published on TheBlaze.com.

Critical theory once stood out as the absurd progressive notion that it is. Now, its maxims are becoming an integral part of ordinary political discourse. The more you repeat a lie, the more you will believe it, and this is the very dangerous place in which we find ourselves today.

Take this critical theory maxim as an example: If we desire justice, we must sometimes champion what may appear superficially as injustice. It's a necessary evil, if you will, the necessity of “controlled injustice.”

By using truth through fabrication and controlled injustice for justice, we’ll save the republic. We’ll be acting in a noble way.

This definition of justice is defined by the “oppressed,” not the “oppressor.” It is the greatest happiness for the greatest number. To achieve this justice, however, we need to endorse acts on occasion that, while seemingly unjust, serve a higher purpose. It will ensure the stability and the unity of our republic, and this may manifest in ways that seem contradictory to our values. But these are the necessary shadows to cast light on “true justice.”

And isn’t that what we are all after, anyway?

Here’s another critical theory maxim: Sometimes we find the truth through fabrication. Our pursuit of truth sometimes requires a strategic use of falsehoods. The truth is a construct that has been shaped and tailored to promote the well-being of the collective.

We sometimes need to accept and propagate lies designed by "the system” — not the old system, but the system that we’re now using to replace the old to get more justice through injustice and more truth through fabrication.

We’re engaging in a higher form of honesty. When we fabricate, it’s for the right reason. We are reaching up to the heavens fighting for a higher sort of honesty. To fortify the truth, we occasionally must weave a tapestry of lies. Each thread, essential for the greater picture, will ultimately define our understanding and ensure our unity under this infallible wisdom.

The election is coming up. Does this maxim sound familiar? Many think it is imperative that we secure our republic through election control to maintain our republic. Sometimes, we might need to take actions that by traditional standards might be questionable.

The act of securing elections requires cheating. It's not mere deception. It is a noble act of safeguarding our way of life. We're on the verge of losing this democracy, and without deception, we will lose it.

To ensure it doesn't fall into the hands of those we know will destroy it, we may have to make a few fabrications. We're fabricating stories to be able to control or secure the republic through our elections. By using truth through fabrication and controlled injustice for justice, we'll save the republic. Therefore, we'll be acting in a noble way. Stealing an election from those who wish to harm our society is truly an act of valor and an essential measure to protect our values and ensure the continuation of our just society.

If we desire justice, we must sometimes champion what may appear superficially as injustice.

I know it's a paradox of honor through dishonor. But in this context, by embracing the dishonor, we achieve the highest form of honor, ensuring the stability and the continuation of our great republic.

Let this be heard, far and wide, as a great call to patriotic action. As we advance, let each of us, citizens of this great and honorable republic, consider these principles. Not as abstract or paradoxical but as practical guides to daily life. Embrace the necessity of controlled injustice, the utility of lies, the duty to secure our electoral process, and the honor and apparent dishonor. These are not merely strategies for survival. They are prerequisites for our prosperity.

We all have to remember that justice is what our leaders define, that truth is what our party tells us. Our republic stands strong on the values of injustice for justice, honor through dishonor, and the fabrication of truths. To deviate from this path is to jeopardize the very fabric of our society. Strength through unity; unity through strength.

We've heard this nonsense for so long. But now, this nonsense is becoming an instituted reality, and we are entering perilous times. Don't be fooled by the narratives you will hear during the march to November. Never let someone convince you that the ends justify the means, that a little bit of injustice is needed to achieve a broader, collective vision of justice, that truth sometimes requires fabricated lies and narratives. If we do, justice will cease to be justice, truth will cease to be truth, and our republic will be lost.

Top 5 MOST EVIL taxes the government extorts from you

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"In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes." -Ben Franklin

The injustice of taxation has been a core issue for Americans since the very beginning of our country, and it's a problem we have yet to resolve. This belief was recently reignited in many Americans earlier this month on tax day when the numbers were crunched and it was discovered that the government was somehow owed even more hard-earned money. As Glenn recently discussed on his show, it's getting to be impossible for most Americans to afford to live comfortably, inflation is rising, and our politicians keep getting richer.

The taxpayer's burden is heavier than ever.

The government is not above some real low blows either. While taxes are a necessary evil, some taxes stretch the definition of "necessary" and emphasize the "evil." Here are the top five most despicable taxes that are designed to line the IRS coffers at your expense:

Income Tax

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"It would be a hard government that should tax its people one-tenth part of their income." -Ben Franklin

On February 24th, 2024 we hit a very unfortunate milestone, the 101st anniversary of the 16th Amendment, which authorized federal income tax. Where does the government get the right to steal directly out of your paycheck?

Death Taxes

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"Now my advice for those who die, Declare the pennies on your eyes" -George Harrison

Not even in death can you escape the cold pursuit of the tax collector. It's not good enough that you have to pay taxes on everything you buy and every penny you make your entire life. Now the feds want a nice slice, based on the entire value of your estate, that can be as much as 40 percent. Then the state government gets to stick their slimy fingers all over whatever remains before your family is left with the crumbs. It's practically grave-robbery.

Payroll

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"The power to tax is the power to destroy." -John Marshall

What's that? The nice chunk of your paycheck the government nabs before you can even get it to the bank wasn't enough? What if the government taxed your employer just for paying you? In essence, you make less than what your agreed pay rate is and it costs your employer more! Absolutely abominable.

Social Security

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"We don't have a trillion-dollar debt because we haven't taxed enough; we have a trillion-dollar debt because we spend too much." -Ronald Reagan

Everyone knows the collapse of Social Security is imminent. It has limped along for years, only sustained by a torrent of tax dollars and the desperate actions of politicians. For decades, people have unwillingly forked over money into the system they will never see again.

FICA

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"What at first was plunder assumed the softer name of revenue." -Thomas Paine

FICA is the payroll equivalent of Social Security. Your employer has to match however much you pay. It means it costs your employer even more to pay you—again, you'll NEVER see that money. At this point, are you even working for yourself, or are you just here to generate money for the government to frivolously throw away?

5 DISTURBING ways World War III will be different from previous wars

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Has World War III begun?

Over the weekend, Iran launched an unprecedented attack against Israel involving over 300 missiles and drones. This marked the first direct attack on Israel originating from Iranian territory. Fortunately, according to an Israel Defense Forces spokesperson Rear Admiral Daniel Hagari, 99 percent of missiles and drones were successfully neutralized by Israeli defense systems. Iran claimed that the operation against Israel had concluded and that no further offensive was planned, although the possibility of another attack is still present.

This has left many people, including Glenn, wondering the same thing: did we just witness the start of World War III?

Glenn recently had a World War II Air Force Veteran as a guest on his TV special, who told stories of the horrors he and his brothers-in-arms faced in the skies over war-torn Europe. This was a timely reminder of the terrors of war and a warning that our future, if it leads to another world war, is a dark one.

But, if Glenn's coverage of the Iranian attack revealed one thing, it's that World War III will look nothing like the world wars of the twentieth century. Long gone are the days of John "Lucky" Luckadoo and his "Bloody Hundredth" bravely flying their B-17s into battle. Over the weekend, we saw hundreds of autonomous drones and missiles clashing with extreme speed and precision over several different fronts (including space) simultaneously. This ain't your grandfather's war.

From EMP strikes to cyber attacks, here are FIVE ways the face of war has changed:

EMP attacks

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The entire modern world, on every level, is completely dependent on electricity. From your home refrigerator to international trade, the world would come to a grinding halt without power. And as Glenn has pointed out, it wouldn't even be that hard to pull off. All it would take is 3 strategically placed, high-altitude nuclear detonations and the entire continental U.S. would be without power for months if not years. This would cause mass panic across the country, which would be devastating enough on its own, but the chaos could be a perfect opportunity for a U.S. land invasion.

Nuclear strikes

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Nuclear war is nothing new. Many of us grew up during the Cold War, built fallout shelters, and learned to duck and cover. But times have changed. The Berlin Wall fell and so did the preparedness of the average American to weather a nuclear attack. As technology has advanced, more of our adversaries than ever have U.S. cities within their crosshairs, and as Glenn has pointed out, these adversaries are not exactly shy about that fact. Unfortunately, the possibility of an atomic apocalypse is as real as ever.

Immigration warfare

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The strategy of strangling an opposing nation's economy to gain the upper hand is a wartime tactic as old as time. That's why the Border Crisis is so alarming. What better way to damage an opponent's economy than by overburdening it with millions of undocumented immigrants? As Glenn has covered, these immigrants are not making the trek unaided. There is a wide selection of organizations that facilitate this growing disaster. These organizations are receiving backing from around the globe, such as the WEF, the UN, and U.S. Democrats! Americans are already feeling the effects of the border crisis. Imagine how this tactic could be exploited in war.

Cyber shutdowns

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Cyber attacks will be a major tactic in future wars. We've already experienced relatively minor cyber strikes from Russia, China, and North Korea, and it is a very real possibility that one of our adversaries inflicts a larger attack with devastating consequences on the United States. In fact, the WEF has already predicted a "catastrophic" cyber attack is imminent, and Glenn suggests that it is time to start preparing ourselves. A cyber attack could be every bit as devastating as an EMP, and in a world run by computers, nothing is safe.

Biological assault

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Don't trust the "experts." That was the takeaway many of us had from the pandemic, but something less talked about is the revelation that China has manufactured viruses that are capable of spreading across the globe. We now know that the lab leak hypothesis is true and that the Wuhan lab manufactured the virus that infected the entire world. That was only ONE virus from ONE lab. Imagine what else the enemies of America might be cooking up.

The government is WAGING WAR against these 3 basic needs

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The government has launched a full-on assault against our basic needs, and people are starting to take notice.

As long-time followers of Glenn are probably aware, our right to food, water, and power is under siege. The government no longer cares about our general welfare. Instead, our money lines the pockets of our politicians, funds overseas wars, or goes towards some woke-ESG-climate-Great Reset bullcrap. And when they do care, it's not in a way that benefits the American people.

From cracking down on meat production to blocking affordable power, this is how the government is attacking your basic needs:

Food

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Glenn had Rep. Thomas Massie on his show where he sounded the alarm about the attack on our food. The government has been waging war against our food since the thirties when Congress passed the Agricultural Adjustment Act of 1938. They started by setting strict limits on how many crops a farmer could grow in a season and punishing anyone who grew more—even if it was intended for personal use, not for sale on the market. This sort of autocratic behavior has continued into the modern day and has only gotten more draconian. Today, not only are you forced to buy meat that a USDA-approved facility has processed, but the elites want meat in general off the menu. Cow farts are too dangerous to the environment, so the WEF wants you to eat climate-friendly alternatives—like bugs.

Water

ALESSANDRO RAMPAZZO / Contributor | Getty Images

As Glenn discussed during a recent Glenn TV special, the government has been encroaching on our water for years. It all started when Congress passed the Clean Water Act in 1972, which gave the government the ability to regulate large bodies of water. As the name suggests, the act was primarily intended to keep large waterways clear of pollution, but over time it has allowed the feds to assume more and more control over the country's water supply. Most recently, the Biden administration attempted to expand the reach of the Clean Water Act to include even more water and was only stopped by the Supreme Court.

Electricity