The weekend box office numbers are in, and Johnny Depp’s Transcendence failed to live up to expectations – or its hefty price tag. The film reportedly cost $100 million to produce, and made just $11.5 million over the weekend. Transcendence was trounced by Heaven is for Real, which took in an estimated $21.5 million in its opening weekend and cost just $12 million to make. On radio this morning, Glenn characterized Depp’s recent flops at the box office as “the kiss of Depp” as he tried to make sense of the eccentric actor.

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“We were talking about Johnny Depp. And you know what the weird thing is about Johnny Depp? I think he is a Ferris wheel and a slumber party away from being Michael Jackson,” Glenn said. “He’s from Kentucky. Have you ever listened to the guy… You’re from Kentucky, dude… What happened to the American accent? He doesn’t seem to have that anymore. Is it just me?”

To be fair, Depp has lived in France for a number of years, but Glenn questioned whether the actor lives his life in character.

“I have no problem with somebody being a character, somebody who’s eccentric,” Glenn said. “But it’s like he’s lost him. I don’t know who he is. He’s always playing a character in life… You look at his movies, the closer he gets to being a normal human being, the more he can’t pull it off… At one point you were a regular dude. What happened to you?”

Stu ran through some of Depp’s bigger films like the Pirates of the Caribbean series, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and Alice in Wonderland, which all performed quite well at the box office. But, then again, Depp was playing a very specific character in each of those situations.

Ultimately, Glenn doesn’t think the Owensboro, Kentucky native is a bad actor. He just can’t figure him out.

“Do you know what he’s? He’s a combination,” Glenn said. “When I said he’s a Ferris wheel and a slumber party away from being Michael Jackson – he’s not Michael Jackson. He [is] Woody Allen.”

“He might be these people except for the thing that they did that made them horrible,” Stu clarified. “Like Michael Jackson was sleeping with children. That’s why people were upset with Michael Jackson. Woody Allen… married his freaking daughter. That’s why they don’t like Woody Allen. He didn’t do any of those things that we know of.”

Glenn got the last word and couldn’t help but add a slightly maniacal twist to the whole discussion.

“Why has he got an English accent and living in France? There’s a possibility it’s a witness protection program,” Glenn concluded before employing his best attempt at Depp’s accent. “’Only blokes in Kentucky would want to hide me in jail so I’ll hide in disguise in my blue glasses, I will.’”