THIS is one of the best Glenn monologues of the year!

Check out behind-the-scenes photos from the show HERE.

I’m telling you, we’re living in an America that I’ve never seen before.  It’s an upside-down world.  Remember, somebody said that a few years back, you won’t understand the world.  One day, you’ll wake up, and the whole country has changed.

That’s it.  It’s almost like we’re in a movie, and I just want to go home.  Don’t you wish we had like little ruby slippers we could like there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home?  I’m telling you, the flying monkeys are coming.

I was thinking about, because this is what I do, this is what I do for a living, I think about things like The Wizard of Oz.  That’s the way I roll.  And I was thinking about Dorothy.  Wasn’t she just glam?  And I was thinking, you know, Dorothy has this little problem of this little yappy dog.  I hate these dogs, the kinds that are always like yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, and they’re as big as your foot, and yet you can’t kick them.  That would be wrong.

Well, the old lady down the street wants to take the little yappy dog because it bit her, and the woman deserved to be bitten.  It’s the only time I look at the little yappy dog, and I’m like, “Good dog, good dog.”  You’re plastic.  What’s wrong?  What’s up with that?

Anyway, so the lady wants to take, and so Dorothy, what does Dorothy do?  She puts it in the little basket where I keep all my little yappy dogs, and she’s like I’ve got to run away to the circus.  And so she runs into the circus trying to find somebody who will give her hope and change, but then the storm comes – oh, there’s a storm in this one too and it’s really bad?  Let’s sing about it – somewhere over the rainbow.

Okay?  In the end, we find out that the whole thing’s a total sham, okay?  When she goes, because I think like she gets in a house, and then a house falls on her or the house falls on a witch or her sister.  Here, the house falls on like two little feet.  It’s like the ruby slippers, the ruby slippers, get the ruby slippers, and then she comes over and she’s like I’ve got to put the ruby slippers on.

Oh, I don’t know why I’m doing it, except it’ll be really agonizing to run down the stupid brick road with these ruby slippers.  I mean, who wears heels in a place like this?  Anyway, can’t we have some comfortable shoes.

So what happens?  The witch comes – I’ll get you, my pretty.  But just in time, this one comes, and you think wait a minute, she’s a witch?  She can’t be a witch.  She’s too beautiful.  Yeah, this is what a witch is supposed to look like.  And so what does she do?  Remember, she takes Dorothy and her little dog – and your little dog too – and she goes into the castle, and she’s sitting there at one point with that big huge, you know the big huge globe, and she’s like puppies, puppies, puppies.

And she’s in the zzzzzzzz and even Toto’s zzzzzzzzyeah, sleep, sleep.  What’s she doing?  She’s watching everything, right?  She’s monitoring.  She’s harassing.  Ooh, she’s scary.  Meanwhile, I just want to go home.  I’m so sleepy.  I forgot to tell you some of the people that she meets along the way, people that keep promising I’m going to help you, some of them are well-intentioned, but they’re all deeply flawed, even this one, the “good witch.”  Really?

What is the good which doing to Dorothy?  Oh Dorothy, all you have to do is wear the ruby slippers and then just go for a long, long, long, long walk.  Somebody’s going to set you on fire.  Dorothy just wants to go home.  She can help her, but she wants her enemies defeated, and she knows she can do it.  She can’t, but she can.  Got it?

Go see the Wizard.  Who’s the Wizard?  He’s the answer?  When you get there, you’re like this guy is a loser.  He’s corrupt.  He presents himself as a loving and kind man just wanting to help, but he’s a complete phony in the end who actually sends Dorothy out into danger.  Why?  Because he too wants to kill her.

All you have to do, come back!  All you have to do is bring me the broomstick.  What?  Why don’t you do it?  He doesn’t care about Dorothy.  He’s being selfish and ruthless.  The only difference between the two is eventually the Wizard admits it.  In the end, the Wizard says I don’t really have any power.  I’ve got a bunch of crap in a closet.  That’s all I’ve got.

And he says I can’t take you home.  Oh, that’s when she reveals in the end oh, you know what, you actually had the power the whole time.  That’s when if I were Dorothy, I would have – but she doesn’t.  She’s like really, what do I have to do?  Oh, just bear down, focus for a minute, and will yourself there – there’s no place like home, there’s no place like homeAnd you and you and you were there.  The end.

Now, why am I telling you the story of The Wizard of Oz?  Well, let me take you through some of the characters again.  Who’s Dorothy?  Dorothy is us, the American people.  Dorothy is the one who has a little problem, got a little yappy dog, but I love the yappy dog.  I love her.  But you’re not taking care of him.  You’re not paying attention, something else as it’s biting people.  Oh yeah, but I love it.

So what we do because somebody’s like hey, there are some things you have to do?  What do you do?  You run, you run away, and you run to somebody offering hope and change at a carnival.  That’s not going to work out well.  And then when we run home, it’s too late because the house is about to be sucked up with you in it, a little too late.

So once it gets too late, then you have somebody up here going ah, puppies, watching you the whole time.  Who’s this?  NSA, is that you?  Government regulators, is that you?  The IRS, ObamaCare, is that you?  Ah, puppies, puppies, yes, it is.

Gee, if Dorothy would’ve paid attention a little earlier, maybe this one wouldn’t have had happened.

So what does she do?  She gets advice from this one.

But why won’t this one actually take care of the problem?  Why won’t this one just tell her hey, you know what, you could go home.  I am a bad witch in the end because you could go home right now, but I’m going to send you on this really, really nasty, nasty adventure.

She could’ve done it, but she didn’t, because she wanted her enemies defeated.  Gee, is there anybody that’s like that that could stop things but really doesn’t because he’s got some people he wants taken out?  Bingo, Mitch McConnell.  Now, who’s the Wizard?  Well, we keep going to the Wizard right?  Everybody says go to the Wizard because he has all of the answers.  Boom, Karl Rove, is that you.  Uh huh.

Now, along the way we meet a couple of other dopes, somebody who’s like I don’t know which way to go, I’m Lindsey Graham, I have no idea which way to go, the Scarecrow.  Then, of course, you have the Tin Man, the old broken-down rusty machine, John McCain.  And if you don’t think John McCain will take an axe to you if somebody oils him up, you can’t see John McCain going oh, oil my arms, oil my arms?

Yeah, he would, and then he’d cut you up into little pieces with his axe.  And he’s an old rusted piece of crap from the last century left in the woods.  Don’t oil him.  Oil my arms – don’t do it.

And the Cowardly Lion, somebody who says I’m going to help you, yeah, I’m going to help you lots, and then soon as trouble starts up – John Boehner? – doesn’t do jack.  I was afraid.  I was afraid.  Look, here’s the thing, puppies, this is real – puppies, puppies.  May I suggest you get your little dog too and your little ruby slippers, okay?

I mean, I would like to wake up from this dream.  I’d like to be able to say I had a crazy dream, and there was this guy who was the president and the NSA and the drones and then all that stuff.  I’d like to be able to say and you were there and you and you and you.  Sure, when we wake up, our world won’t be quite as colorful.  It’ll be black and white and more of a sepia tone.

It won’t be as exciting, of course, but at least it will make sense.  At least it’ll have everything in it that is meaningful.  In the end, all of these things that you were looking for, all these people that you were saying oh gee, they’re going to have the answers, remember, they’re only circus people or hired hands.  You have to dig deep and just say there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home.

'The Handmaid's Tale' got it right, just with the wrong religion

Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

Just in case The Handmaid's Tale's heavy-handed message wasn't already heavy-handed enough, a recent episode made it clear there's always room for further hysteria. Particularly, in relation to depictions of a “patriarchal society" run by Christian doctrine and determined by men — oh those dastardly men.

RELATED: Christian privilege is the new white privilege

The show appropriates Margaret Atwood of the same name, depicting a totalitarian society led by Christian doctrine in which women's bodies are controlled, and they have no rights. The story sounds familiar, but not in the same way Atwood and the show's creators have so smugly assumed.

Just as tone-deaf as 4th wave feminism itself, and tone-deaf in all the exact same places. Most notably, the show's heavy-handed indignation toward Christianity. Toward the patriarchy. Toward conservatives and traditional values. And just like 4th wave feminism, the show completely overlooks the irony at play. Because there is a part of the world where women and children are being raped and mutilated. In fact, in this very real place, the women or girls are often imprisoned, even executed, for being raped, and they are mutilated in unspeakable ways.

Theirs is a cruel, bloody, colorless life.

There is a place, a very real place, where women are forced to cover their entire bodies with giant tarp-like blankets, which is all the more brutal given the endless heat of this place. There is a place where women literally have one-third of the rights of men, a place where women are legally, socially and culturally worth less than men.

They cannot drive cars. They cannot be outside alone. They cannot divorce, they cannot even choose who they marry and often, they are forcibly married at a young age.

They are raped. A lot. Theirs is a cruel, bloody, colorless life. This is the life of tens, perhaps hundreds of millions of women. And, I'll tell you, their religion isn't Christianity.

Science did it again. It only took 270 million years, but this week, scientists finally solved the mystery that has kept the world up at night. We finally know where octopuses come from: outer space. That explains why they look like the aliens in just about every alien movie ever made.

RELATED: Changes in technology can be cause for concern, but THIS is amazing

It turns out octopuses were aliens that evolved on another planet. Scientists haven't determined which one yet, but they've definitely narrowed it down to one of the planets in one of the galaxies. Hundreds of millions of years ago (give or take a hundred), these evolved octopus aliens arrived on Earth in the form of cryopreserved eggs. Now, this part is just speculation, but it's possible their alien planet was on the verge of destruction, so Mom and Dad Octopus self-sacrificially placed Junior in one of these cryopreserved eggs and blasted him off the planet to save their kind.

This alien-octopus research, co-authored by a group of 33 scientists, was published in the Progress in Biophysics and Molecular Biology journal. I'm sure you keep that on your nightstand like I do.

Anyway, these scientists say octopuses evolved very rapidly over 270 million years. Which sounds slow, but in evolutionary terms, 270 million years is like light speed. And the only explanation for their breakneck evolution is that they're aliens. The report says, “The genome of the Octopus shows a staggering level of complexity with 33,000 protein-coding genes — more than is present in Homo sapiens."

Lucky for us, they landed in the water. Otherwise, we might be octopus pets.

They mention that the octopus' large brain, sophisticated nervous system, camera-like eyes, flexible bodies and ability to change color and shape all point to its alien nature. Octopuses developed those capabilities rather suddenly in evolution, whereas we're still trying to figure out the TV remote.

These biological enhancements are so far ahead of regular evolution that the octopuses must have either time-traveled from the future, or “more realistically" according to scientists, crash-landed on earth in those cryopreserved egg thingies. The report says the eggs arrived here in “icy bolides." I had to look up what a “bolide" is, and turns out it's a fancy word for a meteor.

So, to recap: a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, an alien race of octopuses packed their sperm-bank samples in some meteors and shot them toward Earth. Lucky for us, they landed in the water. Otherwise, we might be octopus pets.

President Trump's approval rating is rising, and Democrats — hilariously — can't seem to figure out what's going on. A few months ago Democrats enjoyed a sixteen point lead over Republicans, but now — according to CNN's recent national survey — that lead is down to just THREE points. National data from Reuters shows it as being even worse.

The Democratic advantage moving towards the halfway mark into 2018 shows that Republicans are only ONE point behind. The president's public approval rating is rising, and Democrats are nervously looking at each other like… “umm guys, what are we doing wrong here?"

I'm going to give Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi a little hint. We know that the Left has enjoyed a “special relationship" with the media, but they might want to have a sit down with their propaganda machine. The mainstream media is completely out of control, and Americans are sick of it. We're DONE with the media.

RELATED: The mainstream media wants you to believe Trump is waging war on immigrants — here's the truth

Look what has been going on just this week. The president called MS-13 gang members animals, but that's not the story the media jumped on. They thought it was more clickable to say that Trump was calling all immigrants animals instead. In the Middle East, the media rushed to vilify Israel instead of Hamas. They chose to defend a terror organization rather than one of our oldest allies.

Think about that. The media is so anti-Trump that they've chosen a violent street gang AND A GLOBAL TERROR ORGANIZATION as their torch-bearing heroes. Come on, Democrats. Are you seriously baffled why the American people are turning their backs on you?

Still not enough evidence? Here's the New York Times just yesterday. Charles Blow wrote a piece called "A Blue Wave of Moral Restoration" where he tried to make the case that the president and Republicans were the enemy, but — fear not — Democrat morality was here to save the day.

Here are some of these cases Blow tries to make for why Trump is unfit to be President:

No person who treats women the way Trump does and brags on tape about sexually assaulting them should be president.

Ok, fine. You can make that argument if you want to, but why weren't you making this same argument for Bill Clinton? Never mind, I actually know the reason. Because you were too busy trying to bury the Juanita Broaddrick story.

Let's move on:

No person who has demonstrated himself to be a pathological liar should be president.

Do the words, “You can keep your doctor" mean anything to the New York Times or Charles Blow? I might have saved the best for last:

No person enveloped by a cloud of corruption should be president.

I can only think of three words for a response to this: Hillary Frigging Clinton.

Try displaying a little consistency.

If the media really wants Donald Trump gone and the Democrats to take over, they might want to try displaying a little consistency. But hey, maybe that's just too much to ask.

How about starting with not glorifying terrorist organizations and murderous street gangs. Could we at least begin there?

If not… good luck in the midterms.

In the weeks following President Trump's decision to recognize Jerusalem as Israel's capital, the mainstream media was quick to criticize the president's pro-Israel stance and make dire predictions of violent backlash in the Middle East. Fast forward to this week's opening of the US Embassy in Jerusalem and the simultaneous Palestinian “protests" in Gaza.

RELATED: Just another day in Iran: Parliment chants death to America after Trump pulls out of nuclear deal

Predictably, the mainstream media chastised Israel for what they called “state-sanctioned terrorism" when the IDF stepped in to protect their country from so-called peaceful Palestinian protesters. Hamas leaders later admitted that at least 50 of the 62 Palestinians killed in the clashes were Hamas terrorists.

“In our post-modern media age, there is no truth and nobody even seems to be looking for it …. This is shamefully clear in the media especially this week with their coverage of the conflict between the border of Israel and the Gaza strip," said Glenn on today's show. He added, “The main media narrative this week is about how the IDF is just killing innocent protesters, while Hamas officials have confirmed on TV that 50 of the 62 people killed were working for Hamas."

The mainstream media views the Palestinians as the oppressed people who just want to share the land and peacefully coexist with the people of Israel. “They can't seem to comprehend that in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, only one side is actively trying to destroy the other," surmised Glenn.

Watch the video above to hear Glenn debunk the “peaceful Palestinian protest" fallacy.