Glenn: We're at the end of the highway and there is one exit left before World War 3

Below is a transcript of Monday's monologue

I want to have a conversation with you today about something really important.

If you are a longtime viewer of this program, you have seen me in the past make predictions, and I am going to make one today, but I need to take you back to the very beginning because this one I urge you to hear and then follow through on. I want to take you back first to September 11, 2001. We all remember it. We remember exactly where we were, who we were talking to. We remember the whole day, honestly, the shock.

Our comfortable little worlds had been shattered. We didn’t know what to do. We had no idea. Sadness, fear, knowing that this whole thing could just come apart, we didn’t know, knowing that we were at war but not even who we were at war with. Then the next day happened, and the next day will always be the most important date to me. It was 9/12, September 12. We were never prouder to be Americans, and it wasn’t just because the flag. It had nothing to do with that.

We had stood in line that day to give blood. We hugged each other. We stopped, and we asked strangers, “How are you doing?” We looked at one another. We loved one another. For one moment in time, we saw each other as human beings, and all of the labels just vanished. There was no pretension. There were no classes. There were no political parties. We were just human beings looking out for one another.

We weren’t, you know, naïve enough to forget our differences. We knew that we were still different, but we put them in their rightful place, low on the priority list. We’re at our best when we live like that, and that’s what America used to be. America, when we are at our best, we look at the things that unite us, not divide us. Our humanity reigns over polarity. It used to be that we were calling ourselves a melting pot, and that’s what it meant, we’re all in it together.

Today, September 11, our kids don’t even know what September 11 is, and September 12, 9/12 is a distant memory for most. And people are put right back into their little boxes. We’ve all done it. Everything about them is assumed. There is vitriol and hatred.

We have to find the way to lay our differences aside and to see each other as humans and as Americans first before the next big tragedy, because the globe is spinning into chaos, and what I see happening next is going to make the banking collapse look tame by comparison. And I want you to understand the cascade effect of all this because in the end, men’s hearts will fail. In the end, the human heart collapses, and I believe it’s already happening in some places of the world.

We are more than just political animals. We’re just animals. When you have a seven-year-old holding up a human head, and the world says, meh. I want to show you the timeline and take you back here for just a bit. In 1999, I talked about a guy I couldn’t even pronounce his name. I was on WABC in New York, and I think we had just bombed the aspirin factory or something, and I remember because conservatives were saying that I was trying to help Bill Clinton.

And he had just bombed the aspirin factory, and I said, “It has nothing to do with politics. Have you read the words of Osama bin Laden?” Most had not. They didn’t know who he was. I couldn’t even pronounce the guy’s name, and that’s not a surprise for anybody, but I didn’t even know how to pronounce the guy’s name. I’d never heard of him before. I read about his name, saw that’s who we were targeting, and then decided to do my own homework and look into him.

And I got so frustrated at one point, a caller, I said, “Look, within the next ten years, this guy is going to rain blood and bodies and buildings in the streets of New York.” Will you then wake up?” Well, it wasn’t ten years. That was in 1999. It was September 2001 where he rained blood, bodies, and buildings in the streets. It was too late. We could’ve done something, but it was too late.

In 2003, I started talking about the head of the snake being Iran, that we could not mess around with Iran. And I started talking about the 12th Imam, started really looking into the 12th Imam and didn’t really understand it in ’03, but when we were going to war, and we started to ramp up about going into Iraq, I started paying attention to Iran and what was going on. And I said at the time there’s going to come a time, if you don’t act soon, there’s going to come a time you’re not going to be able to deal with Iran.

In 2004, I figured out that the Republicans were lying to us because there was stuff happening on the border that didn’t make sense. They weren’t protecting our values. They were going on some other set of values. They were going on their interests, what was politically expedient for them. That’s when I started pulling away from the GOP.

The housing crisis in ’06, I started talking about that, in ’07, the stock bubble. In ’06, I was saying, “Please don’t take out these loans. Please, they don’t make any sense. Listen to your values, not your interest of getting a house, not just somebody who’s trying to sell you something. Listen to your values. It’s not going to work.” And as that started to grow, I saw the stock market up about 14,000, and I said, “This is insane, because none of it is real. There is a collapse coming.”

At this point in ’07, we were in the middle of an election, and what were Republicans saying to me? Republicans were saying, “Shut up. You don’t know what you’re talking about. Besides, there’s a bigger problem. It’s Barack Obama or it’s Hillary Clinton getting into office, and this isn’t going to happen. And even if it does, you’re hurting the chances of the Republicans because the Republicans were the ones who did it all.” Really?

Stop looking at your political interests and start concerning yourself with the values. So it collapsed. At about this point, I started talking to, it was right around here that I started saying, “This is a highway. These are off ramps. There’s things on the horizon, and if you don’t take this off ramp, if you don’t get off here, if you don’t get off here or here or here or here, at some point we run out of road. There’s nothing left.”

That’s why when I started sensing all of this in 2009, we started the 9/12 Project. What was the 9/12 Project? The 9/12 Project, a lot of people will think that it has something to do with the Tea Party. It had nothing to do with the Tea Party. If you remember, I was against the Tea Party. I said that it was about taxes, and that’s not what it was about. It needed to be about values and principles.

Follow me here, values and principles in 2009. Then I started talking about the European uprising with a little book called The Coming Insurrection, and I said there’s going to be Nazis, and the old hatreds of the 1930s are going to start rising up. But that was a conspiracy theory, and I was an anti-Semite bigot for even bringing that up.

Then we did Restoring Honor in Washington, D.C., principles and values, Restoring Honor. Then I started talking about the caliphate and how the left and the Islamic extremists would unite to collapse the Western world. First, they’d go after Israel, and then they’d go after the rest of us. That was insane. I followed that that summer with Restoring Courage. We continued on that vein in one form or another, and then we did Restoring Love.

That brings us to here. We didn’t take any of these exits. We mocked. We ridiculed. Why? Why? Whether you’re a Republican, and you mocked here for your political interests or you’re a Democrat, and you mocked here for your political interests, that’s the only reason why we didn’t get off. There is one other reason, it’s too horrible to look at these things. It’s too horrible to imagine any of these things. All of these things have happened now.

All of these things were insane to say at the time. They were too hard to imagine. I understand. I don’t want imagine them. I say to people all the time, they say, “I don’t want to hear any more from you on your predictions, because they tend to come true.” Try living with me. Try being me. Do you think I want to think these things?

I believe we’re at the end of the highway. This is it. This is it. What’s the answer? Let me just speak to the religious in our audience – gospel principles. That’s it, live like Jesus, live like Gandhi. I don’t care who your model is. Live like Buddha. You’ve got to shed pride. We have got to shred wanting stuff. Buddha said that life is suffering. I don’t agree with that.

Yes, actually when you understand that suffering is caused from desire to have something, whether that be I want my kids to get better, that causes you stress and suffering, to I want that car, stress and suffering. I don’t care what religion you’re in, we have to start living eternal principles, and we have to start softening the heart. I don’t care what religion you’re in. I don’t care what party you’re part of. I don’t care if we disagree with each other. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter.

What is coming is all of this stuff, all of this stuff. The caliphate is here. We are headed towards World War III. I hope we don’t get there. I don’t want to get there. I don’t know how to tell you not to get there, because we’ve missed all of the exits. We are headed for massive European anti-Semitism. Europe does this over and over again. We’re headed there.

We’re headed for a collapse beyond our understanding because we got off the gold standard. What’s our money worth? Did you notice that this weekend Russia and China finished the de-dollarization of their relationship? They don’t deal in dollars anymore with each other. They don’t have to. Which side do you think China has just picked? They picked Russia.

Which side is Russia on when it comes to the caliphate? Oh, that’s right, Iran and Syria. What side are we on? Saudi Arabia. Gee, that puts America in the position of World War II where you look at World War II, well, you’ve got communists, and you have fascists. Well, neither of us want to live under communism or fascism, oh, but we really don’t like the Nazis compared to the communists, so we’ll just cozy up to the communists.

It’s almost like who do you want to cozy up to? You’ve got Iran running a caliphate, or you have Saudi Arabia. Well, we really don’t like Iran, but we kind of like Saudi Arabia. It’s World War II all over again.

I thought about this all weekend. I thought what can I possibly say to you, what can I possibly say to you on how to get out of this? I don’t know. I’ve already said it all. We are now down the highway. There’s no more exit ramps. What you have to be is the impact zone. You have to be the parachute. You have to be the one that helps society absorb what’s coming.

If we don’t stand and stand together across all political parties, all lines, all classes, and we just help each other, and we exercise the human heart – it’s a muscle, if you don’t use it, it ain’t going to work – if we don’t do that, I don’t know if we survive. I don’t know who does. I don’t know who does, but the world is about to change.

I have a guest on here in a few minutes, I can’t wait to talk to him. I’ve never talked to him before. I don’t know much about him other than he was writing for the Village Voice, which I don’t usually go to the Village Voice for, you know, anything that I would agree with. But I want to show you something.

In the Village Voice, he wrote to a reader who wrote in and said this: “Hi Andrew, I’m writing because I just can’t deal with my father anymore. He’s a 65-year-old super right-wing conservative who’s basically turned into a total a**hole, intent on ruining our relationship and planet with his politics. I’m more or less a liberal democrat with very progressive values and I know people like my dad are going to destroy us all. I don’t have any good times with him anymore. All we do is argue.

When I try to spend time with him talking about politics or discussing current events, there’s still an underlying tension that makes it really uncomfortable. Don’t get me wrong, I love him no matter what, but how do I explain to him that his politics are turning him into a monster, destroying the environment, and pushing away the people who care about him? Thanks for your help, Son of a Right-Winger.”

How do you respond to that? This guy responded in the best way I…This is the best thing I’ve read in a long, long time. Here are the highlights: “Dear Son of a Right-Winger, Go back and read the opening sentences of your letter. Read them again. Then read the rest of your letter. Then read that again. Try to find a single instance where you refer to your dad as a human being, a person, or a man. There isn’t one. You’ve reduced your father – the person who created you – to a set of beliefs and political views and how it relates to you. And you don’t consider your dad a person of his own standing – he’s just “your dad.”

You’ve also reduced yourself to a set of opposing views, and reduced your relationship with him to a fight between the two. The humanity has been reduced to nothingness and all that’s left in its place is an argument that can never really be won...

The world isn’t being destroyed by democrats or republicans, red or blue, liberal or conservative, religious or atheist. The world is being destroyed by one side believing the other is destroying the world. The world is being hurt and damaged by one group of people believing they’re truly better people than the others who think differently. The world officially ends when we let our beliefs conquer love. We must not let this happen...

So we must protect and respect each other, no matter how hard it feels. No matter how wrong someone else may seem to us, they are still human...Love your dad because he’s your father, because he made you, because he thinks for himself, and most of all because he is a person. Have the strength to doubt and question what you believe as easily as you’re so quick to doubt his beliefs. Live with a truly open mind – the kind of open mind that even questions the idea of an open mind.

Don’t feel the need to pick a side. If you do pick a side, pick the side of love. It remains our only real hope for survival and has more power to save us than any other belief we could ever cling to. Your friend, Andrew W.K.” That is the best advice I’ve heard in a long time. Andrew, who writes for the Village Voice, oh boy, that goes against everything politically, doesn’t it? Uh huh.

When there is comfort, there is no growth. When there is growth, there is very little comfort. Let’s get out of our comfort zone and grow and exercise the human heart just a bit.

It's time for our April 29, 2019 edition of our Candidate Power Rankings. We get to add two new candidates, write about a bunch of people that have little to no chance of winning, and thank the heavens we are one day closer to the end of all of this.

In case you're new here, read our explainer about how all of this works:

The 2020 Democratic primary power rankings are an attempt to make sense out of the chaos of the largest field of candidates in global history.

Each candidate gets a unique score in at least thirty categories, measuring data like polling, prediction markets, fundraising, fundamentals, media coverage, and more. The result is a candidate score between 0-100. These numbers will change from week to week as the race changes.

The power rankings are less a prediction on who will win the nomination, and more a snapshot of the state of the race at any given time. However, early on, the model gives more weight to fundamentals and potentials, and later will begin to prioritize polling and realities on the ground.

These power rankings include only announced candidates. So, when you say "WAIT!! WHERE'S XXXXX????" Read the earlier sentence again.

If you're like me, when you read power rankings about sports, you've already skipped ahead to the list. So, here we go.

See previous editions here.

20. Wayne Messam: 13.4 (Last week: 18th / 13.4)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

A former staffer of Wayne Messam is accusing his wife of hoarding the campaign's money.

First, how does this guy have "former" staffers? He's been running for approximately twelve minutes.

Second, he finished dead last in the field in fundraising with $44,000 for the quarter. Perhaps hoarding whatever money the campaign has is not the worst idea.

His best shot at the nomination continues to be something out of the series "Designated Survivor."

Other headlines:

19. Marianne Williamson: 17.1 (Last week: 17th / 17.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Marianne Williamson would like you to pay for the sins of someone else's great, great, great grandparents. Lucky you!

Williamson is on the reparations train like most of the field, trying to separate herself from the pack by sheer monetary force.

How much of your cash does she want to spend? "Anything less than $100 billion is an insult." This is what I told the guy who showed up to buy my 1989 Ford Tempo. It didn't work then either.

Other headlines:

18. John Delaney: 19.7 (Last week: 15th / 20.3)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Good news: John Delaney brought in $12.1 million in the first quarter, enough for fifth in the entire Democratic field!

Bad news: 97% of the money came from his own bank account.

Other headlines:

17. Eric Swalwell: 20.2 (Last week: 16th / 20.2)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

The Eric Swalwell formula:

  • Identify news cycle
  • Identify typical left-wing reaction
  • Add steroids

Democrats said there was obstruction in the Mueller report. Swalwell said there “certainly" was collusion.

Democrats said surveillance of the Trump campaign was no big deal. Swalwell said there was no need to apologize even if it was.

Democrats said William Barr mishandled the release of the Mueller report. Swalwell said he must resign.

Democrats say they want gun restrictions. Swalwell wants them all melted down and the liquid metal to be poured on the heads of NRA members. (Probably.)

16. Seth Moulton: 20.6 (NEW)

Who is Seth Moulton?

No, I'm asking.

Moulton falls into the category of congressman looking to raise his profile and make his future fundraising easier— not someone who is actually competing for the presidency.

He tried to block Nancy Pelosi as speaker, so whatever help he could get from the establishment is as dry as Pelosi's eyes when the Botox holds them open for too long.

Moulton is a veteran, and his military service alone is enough to tell you that he's done more with his life than I'll ever do with mine. But it's hard to see the road to the White House for a complete unknown in a large field of knowns.

Don't take my word for it, instead read this depressing story that he's actually telling people on purpose:

"I said, you know, part of my job is take tough questions," Moulton told the gathered business and political leaders. "You can ask even really difficult questions. And there was still silence. And then finally, someone in the way back of the room raised her hand, and she said, 'Who are you?' "

Yeah. Who are you?

15. Tim Ryan: 21.6 (Last week: 14th / 20.7)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

When you're talking to less than sixteen people in Iowa one week after your launch, you don't have too much to be excited about.

Ryan did get an interview on CNN, where he also talked to less than sixteen people.

He discussed his passion for the Dave Matthews Band, solidifying a key constituency in the year 1995.

Other headlines:

14. Tulsi Gabbard: 25.2 (Last week: 14th / 25.9)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Tulsi Gabbard torched Kamala Harris in fundraising!!!!! (Among Indian-American donors.)

No word on who won the coveted handi-capable gender-neutral sodium-sensitive sub-demographic.

She received a mostly false rating for her attack on the Trump administration regarding its new policy on pork inspections, a topic not exactly leading the news cycle. Being from Hawaii, the state which leads the nation in Spam consumption, she was probably surprised when this didn't go mega viral.

Other headlines:

13. Andrew Yang: 27.2 (Last week: 12th / 27.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Yang has a few go-to lines when he's on the campaign trail, such as: "The opposite of Donald Trump is an Asian man who likes math." Another is apparently the Jeb-esque "Chant my name! Chant my name!"

Yang continues to be one of the more interesting candidates in this race, essentially running a remix of the "One Tough Nerd" formula that worked for Michigan Governor Rick Snyder.

I highly recommend listening to his interview with Ben Shapiro, where Yang earns respect as the only Democratic presidential candidate in modern history to actually show up to a challenging and in-depth interview with a knowledgeable conservative.

But hidden in the Shapiro interview is the nasty little secret of the Yang campaign. His policy prescriptions, while still very liberal, come off as far too sane for him to compete in this Stalin look-alike contest.

Other headlines:

12. Jay Inslee: 30.4 (Last week: 11th / 30.4)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

If you read the Inslee candidate profile, I said he was running a one-issue climate campaign. This week, he called for a climate change-only debate, and blamed Donald Trump for flooding in Iowa.

He also may sign the nation's first "human composting" legalization bill. He can start by composting his presidential campaign.

Other headlines:

11. John Hickenlooper: 32.2 (Last week: 10th / 32.0)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

John Hickenlooper was sick of being asked if he would put a woman on the ticket, in the 0.032% chance he actually won the nomination.

So he wondered why the female candidates weren't being asked if they would name a male VP if they won?

Seems like a logical question, but only someone who is high on tailpipe fumes would think it was okay to ask in a Democratic primary. Hickenlooper would be better served by just transitioning to a female and demanding other candidates are asked why they don't have a transgendered VP.

Other headlines:

10. Julian Castro: 35.7 (Last week: 9th / 36.2)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Lowering expectations is a useful strategy when your wife asks you to put together an Ikea end table, or when you've successfully convinced Charlize Theron to come home with you. But is it a successful campaign strategy?

Julian Castro is about to find out. He thinks the fact that everyone thinks he's crashing and burning on the campaign trail so far is an "advantage." Perhaps he can take the rest of the field by surprise on Super Tuesday when they finally realize he's actually running.

Other headlines:

9. Kirsten Gillibrand: 38.1 (Last week: 8th / 37.8)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Gillibrand wants you to know that the reason her campaign has been such a miserable failure so far, is because she called for a certain senator to step down. The problem might also be that another certain senator isn't a good presidential candidate.

She also spent the week arm wrestling, and dancing at a gay bar called Blazing Saddle. In this time of division, one thing we can all agree on: Blazing Saddle is a really solid name for a gay bar.

Other headlines:

8. Amy Klobuchar: 45.1 (Last week: 7th / 45.5)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Klobuchar is attempting a run in the moderate wing of the Democratic primary, which would be a better idea if such a wing existed.

She hasn't committed to impeaching Donald Trump and has actually voted to confirm over half of his judicial nominees. My guess is this will not be ignored by her primary opponents.

She also wants to resolve an ongoing TPS issue, which I assume means going by Peter Gibbons' desk every morning and making sure he got the memo about the new cover sheets.

Other headlines:

7. Elizabeth Warren: 45.3 (Last week: 6th / 46.0)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Elizabeth Warren is bad at everything she does while she's campaigning. I don't really even watch Game of Thrones, and the idea that Warren would write a story about how the show proves we need more powerful women makes me cringe.

Of course, more powerful people of all the 39,343 genders are welcome, but it's such a transparent attempt at jumping on the back of a pop-culture event to pander to female voters, it's sickening.

We can only hope that when she's watching Game of Thrones, she's gonna grab her a beer.

Other headlines:

6. Cory Booker: 54.9 (Last week: 5th / 55.5)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Booker is tied with Kamala Harris for the most missed Senate votes of the campaign so far. He gets criticized for this, but I think he should miss even more votes.

Booker is also pushing a national day off on Election Day—because the approximately six months of early voting allowed in every state just isn't enough.

Of course, making it easier to vote doesn't mean people are going to vote for Booker. So he's throwing trillions of dollars in bribes (my word, not his) to seal the deal.

Bookermania is in full effect, with 40 whole people showing up to his appearance in Nevada. Local press noted that the people were of "varying ages," an important distinction to most other crowds, which are entirely comprised of people with the same birthday.

Other headlines:

5. Robert Francis O’Rourke: 60.2 (Last week: 4th /62.6)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

Kirsten Gillibrand gave less than 2% of her income to charity. The good news is that she gave about seven times as much as Beto O'Rourke. Robert Francis, or Bob Frank, also happens to be one of the wealthiest candidates in the race. His late seventies father-in-law has been estimated to be worth as much as $20 billion, though the number is more likely to be a paltry $500 million.

He's made millions from a family company investing in fossil fuels and pharmaceutical stocks, underpaid his taxes for multiple years, and is suing the government to lower property taxes on a family-owned shopping center.

He's also all but disappeared. It's a long race, and you don't win a nomination in April of the year before election day. If he's being frugal and figuring out what he believes, it might be a good move.

But it's notable that all the "pretty boy" hype that Bob Frank owned going into this race has been handed over to Mayor Pete. Perhaps Beto is spending his time working on curbing the sweating, the hand gestures, and the issues with jumping on counters like a feline.

Other headlines:

4. Pete Buttigieg: 62.9 (Last week: 3rd / 62.9)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

When we first put candidates in tiers earlier this year, we broke everyone into five categories from "Front Runners" to "Eh, no." In the middle is a category called "Maybe, if everything goes right," and that's where we put Pete Buttigieg.

Well, everything has gone right so far. But Mayor Pete will be interested to learn that the other 19 candidates in this race are not going to hand him this nomination. Eventually, they will start saying negative things about him (they've started the opposition research process already), and it will be interesting to see how Petey deals with the pressure. We've already seen how it has affected Beto in a similar situation.

The media has spoken endlessly about the sexual orientation of Buttigieg, but not every Democratic activist is impressed. Barney Frank thinks the main reason he's getting this amount of attention is because he is gay. And for some, being a gay man just means you're a man, which isn't good enough.

When you base your vote on a candidate's genitals, things can get confusing.

Other headlines:

3. Kamala Harris: 68.6 (Last week: 1st / 69.1)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

There are a couple of ways to view the Harris candidacy so far.

#1 - Harris launched with much fanfare and an adoring media. She has since lost her momentum. Mayor Pete and former Mayor Bernie have the hype, and Kamala is fading.

#2 - Harris is playing the long game. She showed she can make an impact with her launch, but realizes that a media "win" ten months before an important primary means nothing. She's working behind the scenes and cleaning up with donations, prominent supporters, and loads of celebrities to execute an Obama style onslaught.

I tend to be in category 2, but I admit that's somewhat speculative. Harris seems to be well positioned to make a serious run, locking up more than double the amount of big Clinton and Obama fundraisers than any other candidate.

One interesting policy development for Harris that may hurt her in the primary is her lack of utter disgust for the nation of Israel. There's basically one acceptable position in a Democratic primary when it comes to Israel, which is that it's a racist and terrorist state, existing only to torture innocent Palestinians.

Certainly no one is going to mistake Harris for Donald Trump, but a paragraph like this is poison to the modern Democratic primary voter:

"Her support for Israel is central to who she is," Harris' campaign communications director, Lily Adams, told McClatchy. "She is firm in her belief that Israel has a right to exist and defend itself, including against rocket attacks from Gaza."

Just portraying the rocket attacks as "attacks" is controversial these days for Democrats, and claiming they are responses to attacks indicates you think the Jeeeewwwwwwwws aren't the ones responsible for the start of every hostility. Heresy!

Someone get Kamala a copy of the 'Protocols of the Elders of Zion' before she blows her chance to run the free world.

2. Bernie Sanders: 69.2 (Last week: 2nd / 68.3)

CANDIDATE PROFILE

If Bernie Sanders hates millionaires as much as he claims, he must hate the mirror. As a millionaire, it might surprise some that he donated only 1% to charity. But it shouldn't.

It's entirely consistent with Sandersism to avoid giving to private charity. Why would you? Sanders believes the government does everything better than the private sector. He should be giving his money to the government.

Of course, he doesn't. He takes the tax breaks from the evil Trump tax plan he derides. He spends his money on fabulous vacation homes. He believes in socialism for thee, not for me.

Yes, this is enough to convince the Cardi B's of the world, all but guaranteeing a lock on the rapper-and-former-stripper-that-drugged-and-stole-from-her-prostitution-clients demographic. But can that lack of consistency hold up in front of general election voters?

If Bernie reads this and would like a path to credibility, clear out your bank account and send it here:

Gifts to the United States
U.S. Department of the Treasury
Funds Management Branch
P.O. Box 1328
Parkersburg, WV 26106-1328


Other headlines:

1. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr.: 78.8 (NEW)

Joe has run for president 113 times during his illustrious career, successfully capturing the presidency in approximately zero of his campaigns.

However, when the eternally woke Barack Obama had a chance to elevate a person of color, woman, or anything from the rainbow colored QUILTBAG, he instead chose the oldest, straightest, whitest guy he could find, and our man Robinette was the beneficiary.

Biden has been through a lot, much of it of his own making. Forget about his plagiarism and propensity to get a nostril full of each passing females' hair, his dealings while vice president in both Ukraine and China are a major general election vulnerability— not to mention a legal vulnerability for his children. But hey, win the presidency and you can pardon everyone, right?

His supposed appeal to rust belt voters makes him, on paper, a great candidate to take on Trump. The Clinton loss hinged on about 40,000 voters changing their mind from Hillary to Donald in a few states—the exact areas where victory could possibly be secured by someone named "Middle Class Joe" (as he alone calls himself.)

No one loves Joe Biden more than Joe Biden, and there's a relatively convincing case for his candidacy. But we must remember this unquestionable truth: Joe Biden is not good at running for president.

He's a gaffe machine that churns out mistake after mistake, hoping only to have his flubs excused by his unending charisma. But, will that work without the use of his legendary groping abilities? Only time, and a few dozen unnamed women, will tell.

Also, yes. Robinette is really his middle name.

If only Karl Marx were alive today to see his wackiest ideas being completely paraded around. He would be so proud. I can see him now: Sprawled out on his hammock from REI, fiddling around for the last vegan potato chip in the bag as he binge-watches Academy Awards on his 70-inch smart TV. In between glances at his iPhone X (he's got a massive Twitter following), he sips Pepsi. In his Patagonia t-shirt and NIKE tennis shoes, he writes a line or two about "oppression" and "the have-nots" as part of his job for Google.

His house is loaded with fresh products from all the woke companies. In the fridge, he's got Starbucks, he loves their soy milk. He's got Ben & Jerry's in the freezer. He tells everyone that, if he shaved, he'd use Gillette, on account of the way they stand up for the Have-Nots. But, really, Marx uses Dollar Shave Club because it's cheaper, a higher quality. Secretly, he loves Chic-Fil-A. He buys all his comic books off Amazon. The truth is, he never thought people would actually try to make the whole "communism" thing work.

RELATED: SOCIALISM: This is the most important special we have done

Companies have adopted a form of socialism that is sometimes called woke capitalism. They use their status as corporations to spread a socialist message and encourage people to do their part in social justice. The idea of companies in America using socialism at all is as confusing and ridiculous as a donkey in a prom dress: How did this happen? Is it a joke? Why is nobody bursting out in laughter? How far is this actually going to go? Does someone actually believe that they can take a donkey to prom?

Companies have adopted a form of socialism that is sometimes called woke capitalism.

On the micro level, Netflix has made some socialist moves: The "like/dislike" voting system was replaced after a Netflix-sponsored stand-up special by Amy Schumer received as tidal wave of thumb-downs. This summer, Netflix will take it a step further in the name of squashing dissent by disabling user comments and reviews. And of course most of us share a Netflix account with any number of people. Beyond that, they're as capitalist as the next mega-company.

Except for one area: propaganda. Netflix has started making movie-length advertisements for socialism. They call them "documentaries," but we know better than that. The most recent example is "Knock Down the House," which comes out tomorrow. The 86-minute-long commercial for socialism follows four "progressive Democrat" women who ran in the 2018 midterms, including our favorite socialist AOC.

Here's a snippet from the movie so good that you'll have to fight the urge to wave your USSR flag around the room:

This is what the mainstream media wants you to believe. They want you to be moved. They want the soundtrack to inspire you to go out and do something.

Just look at how the mainstream media treated the recent high-gloss "documentary" about Ilhan Omar, "Time for Ilhan." It received overwhelmingly bad ratings on IMDb and other user-review platforms, but got a whopping 93% on the media aggregator Rotten Tomatoes.

This is exactly what the media wants you to think of when you hear the word socialism. Change. Empowerment. Strength. Diversity. They spend so much energy trying to make socialism cool. They gloss right over the unbelievable death toll. BlazeTV's own Matt Kibbe made a great video on this exact topic.

Any notion of socialism in America is a luxury, made possible by capitalism. The woke companies aren't actually doing anything for socialism. If they're lucky, they might get a boost in sales, which is the only thing they want anyway.

We want to show you the truth. We want to tell you the stories you won't hear anywhere else, not on Netflix, not at some movie festival. We're going to tell you what mainstream media doesn't want you to know.

Look at how much history we've lost over the years. They changed it slowly. But they had to. Because textbooks were out. So people were watching textbooks. It was printed. You would bring the book home. Mom and dad might go through it and check it out. So you had to slowly do things.

Well, they're not anymore. There are no textbooks anymore. Now, you just change them overnight. And we are losing new history. History is being changed in realtime.

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You have to write down what actually is happening and keep a journal. Don't necessarily tell everybody. Just keep a journal for what is happening right now. At some point, our kids won't have any idea of the truth. They will not have any idea of what this country was, how it really happened. Who were the good guys. Who were the bad guys. Who did what.

As Michelle Obama said. Barack knows. We have to change our history. Well, that's exactly what's happening. But it's happening at a very rapid pace.

We have to preserve our history. It is being systematically erased.

I first said this fifteen years ago, people need clay plots. We have to preserve our history as people preserved histories in ancient days, with the dead see scrolls, by putting them in caves in a clay pot. We have to preserve our history. It is being systematically erased. And I don't mean just the history of the founding of our country. I mean the history that's happening right now.

And the history that's happening right now, you're a problem if you're a conservative or a Christian. You are now a problem on the left, if you disagree and fall out of line at all. This is becoming a fascistic party. And you know what a fascist is. It doesn't matter if you're a Democrat or a Republican or an independent. If you believe it's my way or the highway, if you believe that people don't have a right to their opinion or don't have a right to their own life — you could do be a fascist.

Christianity might seem pretty well-protected in the U.S., but that's not the case in many parts of the globe.

On Easter Sunday, suicide bombers made the news for killing 290 innocent Christians in Sri Lanka and injuring another 500. On Tuesday, ISIS claimed responsibility for the massacre. Of course, the Western world mourned this tragic loss of life on a holy day of worship, but we forget that this isn't an isolated incident. Indeed, Christians are discriminated at extreme levels worldwide, and it needs to be brought to light. And whenever we do highlight brutal persecutions such as the Easter bombings in Sri Lanka, we need to call them what they are — targeted attacks against Christians. Sadly, many of our politicians are deathly afraid to do so.

RELATED: Hey media, there is absolutely a war on Christians!

A 2018 Pew Research Center study found that Christians are harassed in 144 countries — the most of any other faith — slightly outnumbering Muslims for the top of the list. Additionally, Open Doors, a non-profit organization that works to serve persecuted Christians worldwide, found in their 2019 World Watch List that over 245 million Christians are seriously discriminated against for their religious beliefs. Sadly, this translates into 4,136 Christians killed and 2,625 either arrested, sentenced, imprisoned, or detained without trial over the year-long study period. And when it comes to churches, those in Sri Lanka were merely added to a long list of 1,266 Christian buildings attacked for their religion.

These breathtaking stats receive very little coverage in the Western world. And there seems to be a profound hesitation from politicians in discussing the issue of persecution against Christians. In the case of the Sri Lanka bombings, there's even a reluctance to use the word "Christian."

After the horrific Pittsburgh Synagogue and New Zealand Mosque shootings, Democrats rightfully acknowledged the disturbing trend of targeted attacks against Jews and Muslims. But some of these same politicians refer to the Sri Lanka bombings with careless ambiguity.

So why is it so hard for our leaders to acknowledge the persecutions Christians face?

Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, for instance, certainly did — calling the incursions "attacks on Easter worshippers." Understandably, the term confused and frustrated many Christians. Although, supporters of these politicians argued the term was appropriate since a recent Associated Press report used it, and it was later picked up by a variety of media outlets, including Fox News. However, as more Democrats like 2020 presidential candidate Julián Castro and Rep. Dan Kildee continued to use the phrase "Easter worshippers," it became clear that these politicians were going out of their way to avoid calling a spade a spade.

So why is it so hard for our leaders to acknowledge the persecutions Christians face? For starters, Christianity in democratic countries like the U.S. is seen differently than in devastated countries like Somalia. According to Pew Research, over 70% of Americans are Christian, with 66% of those Christians being white and 35% baby boomers. So while diverse Christians from all over the world are persecuted for their faith—in the U.S., Christians are a dominant religion full of old white people. This places Christians at the bottom of progressives' absurd intersectional totem poll, therefore leaving little sympathy for their cause. However, the differing experiences of Christians worldwide doesn't take away from the fact that they are unified in their beliefs.

By refusing to name the faith of the Sri Lankan martyrs, politicians are sending a message that they have very little, if no, concern about the growing amount of persecution against Christians worldwide.

Martyrs don't deserve to be known as "Easter worshippers." They should be known by the Christian faith they gave their lives for. Decent politicians need to call the tragedy in Sri Lanka what it is — a vicious attack on the Christian faith.

Patrick Hauf (@PatrickHauf) is a writer for Young Voices and Vice President of Lone Conservative. His work can be found in the Washington Examiner, Townhall, FEE, and more.