How your pumpkin is causing climate change

Jack-o'-lanterns are a significant cause of global warming.

Wait what?

Well, according to a blog post on the U.S. Department of Energy website, pumpkins along with other municipal solid waste, decompose into methane - "a harmful greenhouse gas that plays a part in climate change, with more than 20 times the warming effect of carbon dioxide."

So they must cause global warming, right? Glenn reacted to the story on radio Friday.

Pointing out this came from a government website, Glenn said, "Think of how many man-hours were put into this idea."

He also said what he'd say if he was President of the United States.

"Take your crap and get out," Glenn said. "All the dumb ideas and dumb people in your department that have been encouraging you with this stuff."

Listen or read the transcript below for more.

Below is a rush transcript of this segment, it might contain errors.

GLENN: And, you know, it is also Halloween weekend. And I'm very concerned that I found out just recently that now jack-o'-lanterns are a significant cause of global warming.

PAT: Yeah.

STU: Oh, no.

GLENN: Yeah, no, it's true. No, it's not true. But it's true they're saying that now.

STU: So it's not true in reality?

GLENN: Not true in any way, shape, or form. Sure, it's not true.

PAT: What do you mean? More than 1.3 billion pounds of pumpkins produced end up in the trash, according to the Energy Department's website, becoming part of the more than 254 million tons of municipal solid waste produced in the US every year.

GLENN: Holy cow. What happens to those pumpkins when they're just left to rot in the fields or someplace else?

PAT: Well, you just don't grow them. Stop growing pumpkins.

GLENN: So were pumpkins invented by the Halloween industry. Big Halloween?

PAT: Yes.

GLENN: I didn't know that.

PAT: Around the same time the SUV came around.

GLENN: Really? I hear the SUV was invented to take the pumpkins home.

PAT: Yes, it was.

GLENN: Right. There was no room for the family and the pumpkins. And they were like, "What are we going to do?" So they started making the SUV.

STU: And coal.

GLENN: How --

STU: Coal is actually -- coal was only utilized initially because there weren't enough pumpkins. If there were enough pumpkins, they would have never needed coal.

GLENN: Well, because they didn't need to heat anything because the pumpkins were all there destroying the earth.

STU: Right. Because it was so hot back then. Is that what they're really saying right now?

PAT: Yeah, all this methane -- it decomposes into methane, right, which is a harmful greenhouse gas that plays a part in climate change. More than 20 times the warming effect of carbon dioxide. Twenty times.

GLENN: And we've been concentrating on people when it's been pumpkins the whole time.

PAT: Pumpkins and cattle.

GLENN: My gosh.

STU: So what are they suggesting we do? Are they saying don't have pumpkins for holidays?

GLENN: Eradicate the pumpkin. When God made the pumpkin, he didn't put all of this and take all of this into account. The pumpkin is something entirely nonnatural. It's 100 percent manmade. You know that.

STU: I will say some of those gourds looks like aliens. Have you ever noticed that?

GLENN: Right. They're made by big Halloween.

PAT: What they're suggesting is more biorefineries so we can turn the pumpkins into energy.


STU: How many times have we said it?

GLENN: You know, with all the things going on in today's world, this is the one I would focus on.

PAT: Right? Because this is the key to national security for one thing.

GLENN: We already know. Listen, listen, that people are the main cause of global warming.

PAT: Yes, it's not the sun.

GLENN: Right.

PAT: The sun has nothing to do with warming on this planet.

GLENN: Correct. The climate doesn't always change.

PAT: No. It's never changed before, until now.

GLENN: Exactly right. So we know it's people. Now, go with me on this thinking. We also know that it's pumpkins. Now I'll try to say that again with a straight face. We now know that scientists are telling us that global warming is caused by the heavy metal plastic that is in the pumpkin.

STU: Uh-huh.

GLENN: So what do they say? They say, we need to make a biofuel plant that we'll throw all the pumpkins in, right?

STU: More biofuels.

GLENN: More biofuels. We'll heat houses out of the pumpkins because the pumpkins are causing global warming.

Hear me out now.

PAT: Uh-huh.

GLENN: We already know that people are the cause of global warming as well.

STU: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

GLENN: Should we not apologize to Planned Parenthood for making biofuel out of babies?

STU: That is brilliant. You're right.

GLENN: Thank you.

STU: You're right. That's the answer.

GLENN: It is the answer.

STU: The only thing we've been doing wrong so far is we're typically using --

GLENN: Garbage disposals and things like that to get rid of the baby.

STU: It's not about killing the babies. There's nothing wrong with that. But you're getting rid of them, don't put them in the garbage disposal. Burn them for fuel.

PAT: May I go further?

STU: Oh, please do.

GLENN: So you know in case you're turning in and you think we're being sarcastic, everything we just told you about the pumpkins is real, and the biofuel out of babies is also real. But go ahead.

PAT: Yeah. But what I'm now proposing is that we make biofuel out of people.

Featured Image: Children enjoy traditional candle-lit Halloween pumpkins on October 31, 2007 in London. (Photo by Peter Macdiarmid/Getty Images)

Glenn Beck: Here's why Stacey Abrams' fetal heartbeat remarks are hilarious but TERRIFYING

(Left) Image source: video screenshot/ (right) Photo by Marcus Ingram/Getty Images

Georgia Democratic gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams has a new pro-abortion conspiracy theory: "There is no such thing as a [fetal] heartbeat at six weeks ... it is a manufactured sound designed to convince people that men have a right to take control of a woman’s body."

On the radio program Thursday, Glenn Beck and producer Stu Burguiere agreed Abrams' latest "misinformation" is not just ridiculous but could be dangerous if people are actually willing to believe her.

"If you want to defend abortion, go ahead and defend it. Defend what you're actually doing. Stop denying what is reality," Stu said. "If this is such a great defensible policy, then just come out and defend it, but they never can ... you notice how they can't go to the actual thing they say is so important. They keep defending these other things that aren't true."

Glenn said the pro-choice movement was successful for a long time because most people want the decision to be up to the woman and her doctor and that abortion should be safe, legal, and rare. But when leftists began "celebrating" their abortions or calling for "abortion on demand" at any point in the pregnancy, that's when they start to lose support.

"Because they've celebrated abortion and are losing regular people, you can't put that genie back in the bottle. So, what do they have to do now? They have to take the insane step of discrediting medical machines and technology," Glenn said.

"This is after two years, by the way, of them claiming the biggest scandal in the world was people suggesting the voting machines were hacked — after they previously said that voting machines were hacked in elections they [Democrats] lost," Stu pointed out.

"Honestly, gang, think this through because this is where life gets very scary. This is where you go to authoritarian rule and you can kill millions of people because you're truly now discrediting things that everyone knows is true," Glenn warned.

"So, if you disagree ... you can say that is an evil magic box that has made up sounds in it to convince people. If they will buy that, you're at the Salem witch trials. 'If she doesn't float, she wasn't a witch.' That's what you're looking at right now — and what's frightening is, [Abrams] can say this with a straight face and no one discredits her," he continued.

"You don't think that they can convince those people that you are a terrorist because of the way you vote? [...] You don't think they can convince half the country that you should be eliminated, liquidated, put into a camp, whatever authoritarians love to do? ... We are headed towards dangerous, dangerous times. We better wake up and stand together because this is frightening — it's hilarious — but because people are taking it seriously, it is terrifying," Glenn added.

Watch the video clip below to hear more from Glenn. Can't watch? Download the podcast here.

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A big question Glenn Beck has always had about “The Amazing Do-Over” is: How do you get the most powerful and wealthy nation that has ever existed to accept, “You will own nothing … and be happy”? A foundational principle of this country from its very inception has been land ownership. We worked hard, were fiscally responsible, and stayed away from high debt, but the progressive era began to erode all of that.

The Clinton Global Initiative recently gathered the ruling class to tell the plebes how to run their finances and called anyone who dared challenge their ideas “climate change deniers.” Glenn argues we are dangerously far down the “Road to Serfdom” and exposes the progressive playbook to keep us in line. It’s a 600-year-old medieval model that’s been the plan all along.

We’re already feeling economic pain, and yet they’re playing “Game of Thrones” with our lives. Turning us into serfs is their ultimate goal. How do they finish the complete restructuring of the American financial system and our way of life?

On Wednesday night's "Glenn TV," Glenn connects it all on the chalkboard and details the solution to fighting back against the ruling elites.

Watch the full episode below:

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To enjoy more of Glenn’s masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis, and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution, and live the American dream.

These days, it seems like everything is about politics, and comedy has been one of the biggest targets. Many comedians are walking on eggshells, but stand-up comedian and "Saturday Night Live" alum Jim Breuer isn't one of them.

Breuer joined Glenn on the latest episode of "The Glenn Beck Podcast" to talk about why he’d rather be funny than fearful and what inspired his hilarious comedy special, “Somebody Had to Say It," which has garnered almost 1.5 million views as of this writing.

Breuer made it clear that he does not consider himself to be political. "I'm not. I'm 100% not [political]," he told Glenn, before explaining how people started calling him political when he dared to ask questions about a certain shot that we're not allowed to mention, let alone question.

"When did medicine become political?" Breuer asked.

"What kind of price have you paid for being called political?" Glenn asked Breuer.

"To be dead honest with you, once COVID really kicked in, and ... once you realize we're not going to be here, that we're on borrowed time, and I do have God in my life ... you come to terms with reality on a deeper level. And when COVID kicked in, I said, 'You know what? All bets are off.' I already knew I wasn't in control. But now, not only am I not in control from the natural order of life, but now the puppet masters ... are in control," Breuer answered.

"It made me realize I don't have time to worry about what people think of me. I know where I'm at in life. I know where I'm at spiritually. I know where I'm at with my family," he added.

"That's tremendous power," Glenn said. "But it spooks the hell out of people."

"But it shouldn't!" Breuer exclaimed. "I'm excited that other people get this ... but they're stuck. We ain't got time for stuck. To me, this is the time of, 'You gotta rise.' For years and years and years, you allow fear to control your life. Fear of dying. Fear I might get sick ... everything's based out of fear. It's time for the fearless."

Breuer also revealed his secret for dealing with tough times, and he’s seen his share. But he also said he's seen miracles, including the incredible (and hilariously told) story of how he found faith, how God saved his marriage, and why one family friend was convinced his wife belonged to a cult.

Watch the full episode of "The Glenn Beck Podcast" below:

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COO of vegan food giant Beyond Meat arrested for CHOMPING man's nose

Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images

A top executive at Beyond Meat, a plant-based food company, was arrested for reportedly biting a man’s nose in a parking garage near Razorback Stadium in Fayetteville, Arkansas, over the weekend.

Chief Operating Officer Doug Ramsey faces charges of terroristic threatening and third-degree battery after allegedly chomping down on a man's face and "ripping the flesh on the tip of the nose" during an altercation following the University of Arkansas football team’s victory over Missouri State.

According to reports, Ramsey was attempting to leave the parking garage in his Ford Bronco when a Subaru “inched his way” in front of him and made contact with his front passenger’s side tire. Ramsey allegedly “punched through the back windshield of the Subaru” before attacking the Subaru driver with both fists and teeth.

Ramsey “pulled [the Subaru driver] in close and started punching his body,” then “bit the owner’s nose, ripping the flesh on the tip of the nose,” according to reports.

The irony of a vegan food executive trying to make a meal of a human being's face was not missed by those jokesters on Twitter.

BlazeTV host Stu Burguiere is a vegetarian and also just happens to be the executive producer of the Glenn Beck radio program. Glenn joined "Stu Does America" to do a taste test of the plant-based "McPlant" burger, a Beyond Meat product, to see how it fares against the competition. In case you missed it, this was without a doubt the most ridiculous (but entertaining) plant-based food review so far.

Watch the video clip below. Can't watch? Download the podcast here.

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