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Glenn's Show Prep

'The Princess Bride' exposes Ted Cruz

December 01, 2015
Ted Tuttle

Editor

Glenn was among the first to recognize Senator Ted Cruz's unique ability to remember and repeat things back exactly how he hears them. On radio Tuesday, Glenn and his co-hosts played some "incriminating" audio of Cruz quoting lines from the film, The Princess Bride that maybe, just maybe puts his "audio-graphic" talent into question.

"We're going to expose him as the fraud that he really is," Glenn said, jokingly.

Listen and decide for yourself. Start at 15:26.

Below is a rush transcript of this segment, it might contain errors.

GLENN: So glad you're here.

Ted Cruz won't be. We're going to --

PAT: That's for sure.

GLENN: We're going to expose him as the fraud that he really is.

PAT: Man.

GLENN: Now, we've told you about his terrific memory.

PAT: Man, blows the lid off his campaign.

GLENN: I was just going to take him down.

PAT: Oh, boy.

GLENN: We've done our homework. We want to play a little bit of something that happened in Iowa.

PAT: Mr. Memory, they call him.

GLENN: I want you -- is that what they call him?

PAT: That's what they call him.

GLENN: I want you to listen to, if I may, Mr. Memory and what happened in Iowa.

TED: One of my favorite scenes from that movie is if you remember --

PAT: He's talking about Princess Bride.

TED: -- is dead, and they bring him into Billy Crystal to Miracle Max to get a miracle. And Billy Crystal asks, "Well, you know, what is it that they're telling the story of that he needs to live to be with the Princess Bride?" And he doesn't believe their story. And so he blows -- remember, he says, "He's not dead. He's just mostly dead." And then he blows him full and says, "So what is it that you have worth living for?"

(applauding)

PAT: That's a pretty good imitation. But that's not the point.

GLENN: Yeah, it is. That's not the point.

PAT: Disregard that.

GLENN: He didn't come to us as a great Billy Crystal impersonator, did he?

PAT: No, he did not. He came to us as Mr. Memory.

GLENN: Mr. Memory.

STU: Uh-huh.

TED: And Wesley goes, "True love." And Inigo Montoya goes, "You see, he said true love. There's nothing more noble than true love." And Miracle Max goes, "You're right. You're right. There's nothing better than true love, except a nice mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is lean -- (laughter) but that's not what he said. What he said was to blave. And everyone knows to blave means to bluff. And so what happened was he was playing poker, and he was bluffing."

"Liar!"

(laughter)

"Shut up, witch."

"I'm not a witch. I'm your wife. After what you just said, I wish I wasn't.

The problem is he's afraid. Ever since Prince Humperdinck fired him, he's been afraid."

"I told you not to say that name."

"What name? What name?"

"Humperdinck, Humperdinck, Humperdinck."

"I can't hear you!"

GLENN: It's all fun and games at this point. But we want you to listen to the actual film.

PAT: Uh-huh.

GLENN: Princess Bride.

MIRACLE MAX: Look who knows so much, huh. Well, it just so happens that your friend here is only mostly dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.

Please, open his mouth.

Now, mostly dead is slightly alive. Now, all dead, well, with all dead, there's usually only one thing that you can do.

INIGO: What's that?

MIRACLE MAX: Go through his clothes and look for loose change.

Hey. Hello, in there. Hey. What's so important? What you got here that's worth living for?

VOICE: True love.

INIGO: True love. You heard him? You could not ask for a more noble cause than that.

MIRACLE MAX: Sonny, true love is the greatest thing in the world. Except for a nice MLT, a mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich, when the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe. They're so perky. I love that.

But that's not what he said!

He distinctly said "to blave." And, as we all know, "to blave" means "to bluff," huh?

GLENN: Stop. Did you hear it?

PAT: Yeah, several lines left out.

GLENN: He distinctly -- he distinctly said to blave. He didn't say "distinctly."

PAT: No, he did not. He left out that word.

GLENN: Mr. Memory completely left out that word.

PAT: This guy is such a liar.

(laughter)

Oh, man.

GLENN: Now, go ahead and play the rest.

MIRACLE MAX: -- playing cards and he cheated.

VOICE: Liar. Liar. Liar!

MIRACLE MAX: Get back, witch.

VOICE: I'm not a witch. I'm your wife. But after what you just said, I'm not even sure I want to be that anymore.

PAT: Okay. All of that is exactly accurate. Isn't it? It's not?

STU: No. Because her line of I don't want to be that anymore. He says something slightly different.

GLENN: Oh, my gosh. So there's two things.

PAT: Two words now.

GLENN: This guy can't fit in front of Putin. He couldn't sit in front of Putin.

MIRACLE MAX: You never had it so good.

VALERIE: True love. He said true love, Max. My God. He's afraid. Ever since Prince Humperdinck fired him, his confidence is shattered.

MIRACLE MAX: Why did you say that name? You promised me that you would never say that name.

VALERIE: What? Humperdinck. Humperdinck. Humperdinck. Humperdinck. Humperdinck. Humperdinck.

MIRACLE MAX: I'm not listening.

VALERIE: True love, life expiring and you don't have the decency to say why you won't --

GLENN: He didn't say smoodink (phonetic) or whatever --

PAT: That's three words he left out.

GLENN: Three words.

STU: Now, I can understand him shortening for time reasons. You may not be able to do every line.

GLENN: But this is an important issue.

STU: Come on. It's more than that, Ted. Resign from your Senate seat.

GLENN: You call Ted Cruz's office and tell him we don't want anymore of his Mr. Memory tricks around here.

(laughter)

STU: John Kasich has just launched a super PAC to get that massage across.

PAT: Yes.

GLENN: Marco Rubio has new spots on him. Did you hear his reenactment of the Princess Bride?

PAT: It wasn't exactly accurate. He doesn't have an audiographic memory.

GLENN: Mr. Memory may be Mr. Lies.

(laughter)

Betrayal of trust: Medicare insurers face lawsuit over kickback scheme

Spencer Platt / Staff | Getty Images

Editor's note: This article is sponsored by Chapter.

The U.S. government has filed a major lawsuit under the False Claims Act, targeting some of the biggest names in health insurance—Aetna, Elevance Health (formerly Anthem), and Humana—along with top insurance brokers eHealth, GoHealth, and SelectQuote. The allegation? From 2016 to at least 2021, these companies funneled hundreds of millions of dollars in illegal kickbacks to brokers to steer seniors into their Medicare Advantage plans.

If the allegations are true, it means many Americans may have been steered into Medicare Advantage plans that weren’t necessarily the best fit for their needs—not because the plans were better, but because brokers were incentivized by illegal kickbacks.

The Kickback Conspiracy

Navigating Medicare Advantage’s maze of plan options is daunting, so beneficiaries rely on brokers like eHealth, GoHealth, and SelectQuote, who claim to be unbiased guides. But from 2016 to 2021, insurers Aetna, Humana, and Elevance Health allegedly paid brokers millions in kickbacks to favor their plans, regardless of quality. Disguised as “co-op” or “marketing” deals, these payments were tied to enrollment targets. Internal emails revealed executives knew this violated the Anti-Kickback Statute, with one eHealth leader joking that the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) would miss a $15 million Humana deal for minimal enrollments. Brokers used call routing to prioritize high-paying insurers, betraying beneficiaries’ trust.

Discrimination Against the Vulnerable

The scheme wasn’t just about profits—it targeted vulnerable beneficiaries. Medicare Advantage must accept all eligible enrollees, including disabled people under 65. Yet Aetna and Humana allegedly pressured brokers to limit their enrollment, as these beneficiaries were deemed to be less profitable. Brokers complied, rejecting referrals and filtering calls to favor healthier enrollees, incentivized by bonuses. This violated federal anti-discrimination laws and CMS contracts, undermining the founding principles of Medicare by discriminating against the very people it was created to aid.

False Claims and the Pursuit of Justice

The schemes led to false claims to CMS, with insurers certifying enrollments as “valid” despite kickbacks and discrimination. The government paid billions, unaware of the fraud. Examples include Humana’s $12,477 for a 2016 enrollment and Aetna’s $79,047 for a 2020 case. On May 1, 2025, the U.S. filed suit, seeking treble damages and penalties under the False Claims Act. Aetna and others deny the allegations, per May 2025 reports, promising a fierce defense. The case, demanding a jury trial, seeks justice for beneficiaries and taxpayers.

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- Glenn Beck

POLL: Does Brooklyn crash expose a cyber sabotage plot?

Bloomberg / Contributor | Getty Images

A Mexican Navy ship crashing into the Brooklyn Bridge has left the nation stunned, and Glenn is demanding answers.

Are recent devastating ship collisions—first Baltimore’s Francis Scott Key Bridge in 2024, now Brooklyn in 2025—really just accidents, or is something far more sinister at play? Glenn recently warned that these incidents, both involving foreign vessels losing power near critical U.S. infrastructure, could be “shark bumps” by foreign adversaries testing our defenses through cyber sabotage. With the government and media quick to dismiss concerns, Glenn is calling for urgent investigations into possible hacking, independent audits of our ports and bridges, and a serious look at whether our enemies are exploiting vulnerabilities in our digitized systems.

Glenn wants to know what you think: Are these crashes coincidental, or are we under attack? Let us know in the poll below:

Could the recent ship crashes into American bridges be the result of cyber attacks by foreign adversaries?

Should the US government investigate these incidents for possible foreign interference?

Is our critical infrastructure adequately protected from cyber threats?

Are you concerned that foreign adversaries might be targeting US infrastructure through cyber means?

Do you think the media and government are properly addressing the security concerns raised by these incidents?

Glenn: Biden’s autopen scandal rocks White House

NurPhoto / Contributor | Getty Images

Top Democrats knew Biden’s health was deteriorating but covered it up to keep power. Jake Tapper’s book finally lifts the lid on their deception.

Jake Tapper and Alex Thompson’s new book confirms what we suspected all along: Joe Biden’s health was rapidly declining, and the Democratic Party establishment knew it. Rather than be honest with the American people, they chose to cover it up, to prop up Biden just long enough to survive the election cycle. And the media helped them do it.

For years, any mention of Biden’s cognitive decline was framed as a “right-wing smear,” a baseless conspiracy theory. But now, Tapper and Thompson reveal that Biden’s top aides privately discussed the need for a wheelchair after the election — because the man can hardly walk.

We had no functioning president for much of the past administration.

And while Biden’s closest aides were planning that, they and their allies in the press were publicly spinning the fantasy that Joe Biden’s halting gait was due to a heroic foot fracture from a dog-related incident four years ago. They said his frailty was due to his “vigor.” That’s not a joke. That’s a quote.

And while they said this, they were having special shoes made for him with custom-made soles to help him stand. They weren’t planning for a second term. They were planning how to prop him up — literally — just long enough to survive the election. That is a cover-up.

It doesn’t bother me that Biden might need a wheelchair. What bothers me — what should bother every American — is that his aides talked about hiding it until after the election.

Biden wasn’t leading

Needing a wheelchair in your 80s is not a moral failing. It’s human. I own President Franklin D. Roosevelt’s wheelchair — it sits in my museum. That chair represents the strength and resilience of a man who, despite paralysis, led this nation through World War II against a dictator who was gassing the disabled and infirm. He hid his disability out of fear the public wouldn’t accept a leader who couldn’t walk. But he led.

Hannah Beier/Bloomberg via Getty Images

But Joe Biden wasn’t leading. He was a puppet played by faceless swamp creatures whose only concern was maintaining their iron grip on power.

Whatever you think of Tapper, the book reveals the chilling reality that we had no functioning president for much of Biden’s administration. Our commander-in-chief wasn’t just aging — he was declining. And the people around him — government employees, funded by your tax dollars — weren’t honest with you. They lied to you repeatedly and willfully because the truth would have guaranteed a second Trump term. That’s what this was all about.

Who signed the pardons?

Consider the implications of this revelation. We had a president signing documents he didn’t read — or even know about. We had an autopen affixing his name to executive actions. Who operated that autopen? Who decided what got signed or who got pardoned? Who was in charge while the president didn’t even know what he was doing?

Those are not minor questions. That is the stuff of a constitutional crisis.

The problem isn’t Biden’s age. The problem is that the people you elected didn’t run the country. You were governed by unelected aides covering up your elected president’s rapid cognitive decline. You were fed a lie — over and over again. And if anyone tried to blow the whistle, they got buried.

Don’t get distracted by the wheelchair. The chair itself is not the scandal. The scandal is that people inside your government didn’t want you to know about it.

They made a bet: Lie until November, and deal with the fallout later. That is an insult to the American people — and a threat to the republic itself. Because if your government can lie about who’s running the country, what else are they lying about?

We need further investigation and to hold these crooks accountable. If we don’t, it will happen over and over again.


This article originally appeared on TheBlaze.com.

The Woodrow Wilson Mother's Day loophole

Stock Montage / Contributor, Xinhua News Agency / Contributor | Getty Images

I’ve got a potentially helpful revelation that’s gonna blow the lid off your plans for this Sunday. It’s Mother’s Day.

Yeah, that sacred day where you’re guilt-tripped into buying flowers, braving crowded brunch buffets, and pretending you didn’t forget to mail the card. But what if I told you… you don’t have to do it? That’s right, there’s a loophole, a get-out-of-Mother’s-Day-free card, and it’s stamped with the name of none other than… Woodrow Wilson (I hate that guy).

Back in 1914, ol’ Woody Wilson signed a proclamation that officially made Mother’s Day a national holiday. Second Sunday in May, every year. He said it was a day to “publicly express our love and reverence for the mothers of our country.” Sounds sweet, right? Until you peel back the curtain.

See, Wilson wasn’t some sentimental guy sitting around knitting doilies for his mom. No, no, no. This was a calculated move.

The idea for Mother’s Day had been floating around for decades, pushed by influential voices like Julia Ward Howe. By 1911, states were jumping on the bandwagon, but it took Wilson to make it federal. Why? Because he was a master of optics. This guy loved big, symbolic gestures to distract from the real stuff he was up to, like, oh, I don’t know, reshaping the entire federal government!

So here’s the deal: if you’re looking for an excuse to skip Mother’s Day, just lean into this. Say, “Sorry, Mom, I’m not celebrating a holiday cooked up by Woodrow Wilson!” I mean, think about it – this is the guy who gave us the Federal Reserve, the income tax, and don’t even get me started on his assault on basic liberties during World War I. You wanna trust THAT guy with your Sunday plans? I don’t think so! You tell your mom, “Look, I love you, but I’m not observing a Progressive holiday. I’m keeping my brunch money in protest.”

Now, I know what you might be thinking.

“Glenn, my mom’s gonna kill me if I try this.” Fair point. Moms can be scary. But hear me out: you can spin this. Tell her you’re honoring her EVERY DAY instead of some government-mandated holiday. You don’t need Wilson’s permission to love your mom! You can bake her a cake in June, call her in July, or, here’s a wild idea, visit her WITHOUT a Woodrow Wilson federal proclamation guilting you into it.