Willy Wonka, he's not, but is co-host Pat Gray an actual American?
"You don't like Coca-Cola and you don't like Hershey," Glenn said. "You are not an American if you don't like Hershey chocolate."
Friday on The Glenn Beck Program, co-host Stu Burguiere brought in a basket of Easter candy to sample new flavors on the market.
"You know why all this new candy is coming out?" Glenn asked.
Because it's delicious? Because of capitalism? No, people's tastes are changing. It seems folks these days have a taste for upscale, designer chocolate.
"You've always been that low-rent, Hershey chocolate guy," Pat said.
"Well, excuse me if I don't want to pay $26 for a bar of chocolate," Glenn countered. "Hershey chocolate is not low-rent. It's American classic milk chocolate."
"It is not good," Pat said.
"Oh, my gosh. I am so sick and tired of hearing you and your elitist European chocolate snobbery," Glenn said.
"He's pretty fired up about Hershey, isn't he?" Pat laughed.
Enjoy this complimentary clip from The Glenn Beck Program:
Below is a rush transcript of this segment, it might contain errors:
GLENN: Happy Good Friday. And good Easter coming. The boys brought in some big Easter basket. Jeffy has been trying to gnaw on the basket for a while, but it's actually wicker. You can't really eat the basket.
JEFFY: I know. But Stu said there's grass in there.
STU: There is. There's these new Twizzlers. Grass Twizzlers. Look at this -- if you're watching on --
GLENN: Ick.
STU: -- on the TV.
GLENN: Green Twizzlers?
STU: They're green Twizzlers, and they're thin like grass. And they're green apple.
PAT: They're delicious.
GLENN: Are they really?
PAT: Uh-huh. It's good.
GLENN: You know why all this new candy is coming out?
PAT: No. Because it's delicious?
JEFFY: Because of capitalism.
GLENN: Because -- no, people's tastes are changing. And, like, a regular Hershey chocolate bar is not selling like it used to.
STU: Well, there's so many options now. Right?
GLENN: Yeah, like the really upscale -- like, are you eating a Cadbury egg thing?
PAT: Yeah.
JEFFY: Those are good.
PAT: The egg cookie.
STU: I like them too. Cadbury egg cookies now they have.
PAT: So good.
JEFFY: Those were great.
PAT: Oh, my gosh. They're delicious.
JEFFY: What?
GLENN: Cadbury chocolate. Ick.
PAT: They're great. Are you kidding me? Cadbury is awesome.
STU: With the cream inside.
GLENN: No, it's awful.
PAT: It is not.
GLENN: It's awful.
PAT: You've always been that low-rent, Hershey chocolate guy. It's not good.
GLENN: Hershey chocolate is not low-rent.
PAT: Low-rent. It is.
GLENN: No, it's not. It's American classic milk chocolate.
JEFFY: Yes.
PAT: It is not good.
GLENN: Oh, my gosh. I am so sick and tired of hearing you and your elitist European chocolate snobbery.
JEFFY: Boy, that is true there, Pat. That is true.
PAT: It's low-rent Hershey chocolate. That's why it's not selling anymore because it sucks. People's tastes are discerning now. And there's other stuff available.
GLENN: Oh, my gosh. I could not let this go. This chocolate blasphemy. I cannot let it go. He said -- are you kidding me?
PAT: No, I'm not kidding you.
GLENN: Oh, my gosh.
PAT: We've had the Hershey Nestle thing before. We've had that discussion.
GLENN: I know. And Nestle is a European, sucky chocolate.
PAT: I think Nestle -- isn't that American? Nestle is not American?
GLENN: No.
PAT: It's not that good anymore anyway.
(laughter)
GLENN: No.
STU: We actually got a bunch of the new Easter candies, for science reasons on Pat & Stu yesterday.
GLENN: Oh, is that what it is?
PAT: Yeah, it was for science.
STU: White chocolate strawberry shortcake M&M's.
JEFFY: Those were good. Those are real good.
GLENN: I'm willing to try that. I'm willing to try that.
STU: Hang on. Try that out. We have Easter grass candy because this is perfect for like --
GLENN: That sounds awful.
PAT: No, it's good.
GLENN: Ooh, the strawberry shortcake M&M's, that's really good.
STU: Really good, aren't they? The grass things, they look like strands of grass for your Easter basket.
PAT: But it tastes like a candy apple.
STU: Yeah. A green apple.
We have Nerds jellybeans. You into that sort of thing?
GLENN: I don't know what Nerds are.
STU: What? You don't know what nerds are? What do you mean you don't know what they are?
GLENN: I don't know what they are.
JEFFY: Are you from America?
STU: They're fruity candies.
JEFFY: These Starburst jelly beans I have here --
GLENN: Are those good?
JEFFY: Good. It's a shame they're all the way over here.
STU: They have cupcake chocolates, which are --
PAT: The cupcake chocolates are really good.
STU: You like those?
PAT: Uh-huh.
STU: They look like cupcakes, but they're actually chocolates. Got -- what Glenn was talking about -- the Cadbury cream egg cookie, so it tastes like a Cadbury cream egg, but it's a cookie. I thought they were delicious.
PAT: Delicious. I can't believe you don't like Cadbury chocolate.
Do you like Dove? Dove chocolate?
GLENN: Yeah, I love Dove chocolate.
PAT: Dove chocolate is really good.
GLENN: I'll take Dove chocolate.
STU: What about Reese's? Because they've got mini -- not Easter bunnies, but Reester bunnies.
GLENN: Reester bunnies?
JEFFY: Yeah, those are pretty good.
Yeah, the other package we had yesterday that's gone now is the chocolate with the peanut butter.
PAT: The, what?
JEFFY: The chocolate with the peanut butter. The Easter bunny that had the dipping container with peanut butter in it.
STU: Oh, yeah.
PAT: It's essentially a do-it-yourself peanut butter bar.
JEFFY: It was good.
STU: It came with a container of peanut butter.
GLENN: That's the new high fashion?
JEFFY: It was really good.
PAT: I guess so.
GLENN: Here, you can do it yourself.
PAT: I guess so. Because it came with this little container of peanut butter, and you had to dip the chocolate in the peanut butter.
STU: Right. And it was weird because you had to break the bunny's body parts off to dip in the peanut butter. So just break off an ear and dunk it in the peanut butter, and then eat it like an animal. It was kind of nice.
JEFFY: They had the chocolate bunny perforated though. It was good. It was perfect. It's easy.
GLENN: I don't like chocolate bunnies either. It's bad chocolate.
STU: Well, not if it's good chocolate.
PAT: Not if it's Cadbury.
STU: It's not the bunny shape that makes the chocolate.
JEFFY: Not if it's dipped in peanut butter.
STU: This is the sort of stuff, Glenn --
PAT: And you know who else is good is Russell Stover.
JEFFY: Russell Stover is not that good.
PAT: It's delicious.
GLENN: No, it's not.
JEFFY: It's not that good.
PAT: Yes, it is. Yes, it is.
GLENN: You have the --
PAT: It is. It's so much better than Hershey. I mean, if you had a Hershey bunny, no, it's inedible.
JEFFY: Oh, my gosh.
GLENN: Are you kidding me?
PAT: You're not going to eat that. Nobody is going to eat that.
JEFFY: You lost the crowd now.
GLENN: You are absolutely serious too.
PAT: I am.
GLENN: Hershey is the best chocolate made in America.
PAT: It's not even close. It's not even close.
STU: All the high-end chocolate they have out there, you think Hershey -- I mean, I like Hershey. It's fine.
GLENN: Hershey's milk chocolate? Yes.
PAT: No.
STU: No.
GLENN: You know what you guys are, traitors to the nation.
JEFFY: Yes.
GLENN: I hope President Trump executes both of you.
Featured Image: Hershey's chocolate bars are shown on July 16, 2014 in Chicago, Illinois. Hershey Co., the No.1 candy producer in the U.S. (Photo Illustration by Scott Olson/Getty Images)