Glenn Laughs It Up With the Real Live Steven Crowder

You never have to wait long to get down to laughs with Steven Crowder, but he barely got a sentence out Friday on The Glenn Beck Program without letting the jokes fly.

“Do we have a clip of that, Pat?” Glenn asked co-host Pat Gray. “Let's see if we can play a clip of that. We'll get Steven on the phone. Steven, are you there?”

Crowder quickly quipped back in his typical fashion, dripping in sarcasm.

“I am here, sir. But I am not a clip.”

“I know you're not a clip,” Glenn chuckled.

With all the pleasantries out of the way, the two jumped right into finding the humor in the politics of the day – and of course socialism.

A Man of Many Talents

GLENN: Tell me about the audio here. Tell me what you did.

STEVEN: A lot of people, Republicans, conservatives, particularly those kind of in the AM radio set, why do you keep focusing on Bernie instead of Hillary? Because he is a movement candidate. And people specifically my age who are far, far removed from the authoritarian left and socialism or communism, they buy this myth that if you put "democratic" before "socialism," which is what Bernie Sanders does, all of a sudden it's different from socialism. So it's a 20-minute video, but pretty in-depth. It's designed to point out why that, of course, is folly.

GLENN: That's not usually what you do, Steven. Is it?

STEVEN: Sometimes. I'm a man of many -- I wouldn't say -- talents. I'm a man who tries many things. It's just so irking. You know, I show up at colleges. And unlike these other people, you know, they'll stir the pot. They'll try and have protests so they can post it on -- like, I just want to do comedy, right? I just want to do jokes.

But I have so many stand up and go, "What about corporate system, man? And the top 1 percent, the fact that the countries like Norway and Denmark -- I want to my head to explode, and I want to spontaneously combust. So I say, "Okay. Before I have to do this in another Q&A, at a college campus, let's make one video."

Also, you know, I was raised in it. I was raised in socialism. I experienced socialized health care. I was in Quebec. My mom still talks with the accent. People in Texas can't understand her. It's got to be addressed at some point. I hate that I have to do it. But, you know, we all have our cross to bear.

A Democratic Socialist by Any Other Name Is... A Communist

GLENN: You know, we found something -- a fact about democratic socialism, that the term was actually coined by Lenin.

STEVEN: Yeah.

GLENN: And the revolution of the Soviet Union, which we found it incredible. There's no difference.

STEVEN: No, no. Exactly. As a matter of fact, we include that in the video. We have paper-cut-out Lenin, which some people find offensive. But I just find Lenin offensive. So, you know, different strokes.

We talk about how he says, yeah, that the goal of socialism is necessarily communism. For some reason -- you know, my producer, for all of his faults, over there at your affiliate, he had a brilliant point: Democratic socialism is just communism with a check box. You can paint it any way you want. For some reason, people buy this.

And one thing, Glenn, as someone who lives in the United States and was raised in Canada, whenever they say, "We are the only nation -- the United States is the only country that does not have, insert socialist program here." I go, "Yeah, that's how we became America. There's the whole point. We left because of that. We wanted to say we're the only guys we do this." How is that an argument?

But the problem is, younger people believe it. Something fascinating, Glenn, I wrote about this on the website, just a couple days ago. Cuban-Americans, like Ted Cruz's dad, right? Were either Republicans or they saw you as communists. For the first time, Cuban-Americans now lean Democratic. You know why? Because these kids are two generations removed, and they just never experienced communism or socialism. So to them, they hear Bernie, he's going to give you free money, free college, and free health care, all of a sudden it sounds good because you put "democratic" before it. It's mind-numbing.

Misappropriation of Culture

GLENN: Talk about the kid with the dreadlocks. The white kid with the dreadlocks that was pummeled by -- because you're not part of the black culture, kid.

STEVEN: Yeah. Neither was the band Corn. I mean, new metal in the early 2000s, all it was was dreads swinging around on MTV. It was horrible. This is an actual story: A black story who works -- she works at this campus, grabs and physically assaults this white student for racial appropriation because he's wearing cornrows. Now, I know there must be more to this story. There's not. There's not. That's the story. She assaults a white kid for wearing cornrows because it's racist. I don't -- if someone is going to say, hey, you're white. You can't wear cornrows. Why? It's cultural appropriation. You say, well, you're black. You can't wear Levi's. I mean, we've kind of exchanged these goods for a long time. They're stylistic.

John Kasich: The Indifference Affair

GLENN: Talk to me about John Kasich. This is a guy that is -- you know, I think acting as a spoiler in the race. You seem to have a real hatred for John Kasich.

STEVEN: Come on. That's not fair. You know what nobody has ever said -- nobody ever pops their head off their pillow and says, "I hate John Kasich."

GLENN: Right. There's no passion for John Kasich. So -- but you have called him an insufferable fraud.

PAT: I don't know. I'm pretty close to hatred for John Kasich. I'm teetering on the brink. Yeah.

STEVEN: I don't know.

JEFFY: Did you know that his dad was a mailman?

PAT: Yeah, and that almost pushes me over the edge.

GLENN: With John Kasich, I happen to agree with Steven. You can't really hate him because nobody really loves him. The opposite of hate is -- well, no, the opposite of love is indifference. So I guess you would have to hate him. Because, I mean, most people really are -- you look at John Kasich and he doesn't bring anything out of you.

STEVEN: No, no. He doesn't. You know, it's 2016, right. You know what you never hear anybody say if you're talking politics with your. Damn that Gerald Ford, it doesn't come up. It's same thing. I don't think people think of John Kasich, outside of the fact that right now the guy is just a major, major turd. The way he is acting it is unbelievable. There's no way for him to win.

He was sitting there. And people were going, "Why is Ted Cruz trying to bump you out of the election right now?" No, you're bumping yourself out -- by the way, incredible loser. You have to give it to John Kasich. When it comes to losing, the guy is tough. I don't know how he figured it out, but he does incredibly well. My problem is with the fakery. It's the fakery of Donald Trump acting like he's tough. Oh, I'm very tough. Someone should just respond with, okay. Fifteen push-ups. Let's start with that. Just call him out on it. When John Kasich says I'm a nice guy, everything he's ever done has been underhanded. And if you look at the article that I wrote, by all personal accounts, John McCain, Newt Gingrich, John Kasich is an act in person. Nothing about him is true. That's my problem. Outside of that, I never think of the guy.

The Glass Ceiling for Trump

GLENN: Steven, Pat said that he thought that Donald Trump hit his high-water mark, and it's all downhill from here because of everything he's done in the last two weeks is just to crap all over women.

STEVEN: Yeah. Listen, I don't know if this is borderline appropriate. Because the only reason it ever occurred to me -- and, Glenn, I know the only time it ever occurred to me to think of Heidi Cruz, to rate her attractiveness, is when Donald Trump imply she was ugly. So I did my due diligence. I did research. And I thought, "Ted seems to be swinging above his batting average. I think she's a good-looking woman."

GLENN: That's not -- I think five mistresses is so ridiculous. The guy just doesn't have enough game. Come on. It's Ted Cruz.

STEVEN: Yeah, that's my point. He should be grateful he has Heidi.

GLENN: Yeah.

STEVEN: If Ted wanted, he could buy them. Mail-order brides. Or you could buy portions of them. It just doesn't impress me that much. I also don't think it's a fair comparison. Let's compare these wives. And people typed in, Ted Cruz first wife, and Donald Trump first wife. And it looked like the female gremlin, not a great movie. But more character. Jim Hanson, PGI. I think the first wife comparison is more valid.

Cigna — the 13th largest corporation in the U.S. measured by revenue — has recently started teaching employees critical race theory. Those lessons, however, have been "quietly" protested by some workers who leaked lesson screenshots to the Washington Examiner.

On "The Glenn Beck Radio Program," Glenn and co-host Stu Burguiere discussed a lesson on "inclusive language" — and you won't believe which phrases Cigna classifies as offensive. Do you use any of these phrases in your daily life?

Watch the video below:


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WARNING: Here's who's REALLY behind 'spooky, right-wing' extremism

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Over the past year, the left has tried to paint conservatives as "spooky, right-wing" extremists who want to destroy the nation. But true conservatives know that's not true. However, there is a dangerous global movement that fits this "spooky" definition — masquerading as "right-wing" — and it's gaining momentum. It's called Traditionalism, with a capital "T."

This week on "The Glenn Beck Podcast," author and award-winning expert on the radical right Professor Benjamin Teitelbaum joined Glenn to define Traditionalism and explain why it's exactly how the left wants to paint conservatives — but that couldn't be further from the truth.

Teitelbaum said Traditionalism is the "most transformative political movement of the early 21st century" in his book, "War for Eternity," which Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Glenn Greenwald called "an indispensable text" for understanding "the most profound and tumultuous political shifts defining societies on every continent." It's a bizarre story, involving Steve Bannon, Hinduism, Hitler, mysticism, Aleksandr Dugin, the Constitution, and tons and tons of money.

Watch the short video clip below or find the full podcast here:

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Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) joined Glenn Beck on the radio program Thursday to explain how "rabid partisanship" is causing President Joe Biden and his administration to make the political decisions directly responsible for the "absolute crisis at the border" — and it's getting worse every day.

Cruz described how the Biden administration is caving to the "hard left" agenda that supports open borders and views U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement as the equivalent of the Ku Klux Klan or Nazis. He listed the Trump-era policies Biden has overturned, including halting construction of the border wall, re-instituting the failed policy of "catch and release," and ending the "Remain in Mexico" policy — "a big foreign policy victory of the Trump administration."

Cruz then sounded off on the left's unbelievable hypocrisy concerning the "kids in cages" narrative, and the Biden administration's "laughable" excuse for not allowing journalists access to border facilities.

"For four years of the Trump presidency, Democrats and the media talked every day about kids in cages. What they ignored is that Barack Obama built the cages. You and I both went to those cages during the Obama administration," Cruz told Glenn. "They utterly ignored that. And now, Joe Biden is making the cages bigger, and they're more full. And I'll tell you, it's truly a catastrophe. You take a facility, like the Donna facility in South Texas. It has a capacity of 250 people ... it currently has nearly 4,000."

"So, there's a reason why the Biden administration is trying to hide it. I'm flying down to the border tonight, and I'm bringing 18 senators down to the border to see firsthand what's happening. But the Biden administration is refusing to allow press to join us," Cruz continued.

"They won't allow reporters in and, Glenn, their justification is laughable on its face. They say, the reason why they won't allow reporters in is because reporters might have COVID. So one cameraman, a cameraman, and they say, 'No, too big of a COVID risk. We can't let the guy with the camera in.' It's because they want to hide the absolute disaster," he added. "You want to talk about COVID-19? Glenn, I'll give you a stunning statistic. Of the illegal immigrants that are being released in Arlington, Texas, they are testing positive for COVID-19 at a rate seven times higher than the U.S. population."

Watch the video below to catch more of Glenn's conversation with Sen. Ted Cruz:


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Democrats want us to believe that guns are the threat, when it is their policies that are the real danger to people's lives. They don't care if you're a single mother living in a rough neighborhood. The Left isn't concerned with your protection and well-being. They want you disarmed, period.

They've concentrated the intelligence community, the FBI, and even the military on the false threat of hordes of white supremacists and domestic extremists living next door. This is about CONTROL, and this week gave the Left yet another crisis to help them seize it. But only if we let them.

Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-Colo.) joins Glenn Beck on the Wednesday night TV special to discuss whether any legislation could prevent another mass shooting like we saw in Atlanta, Georgia, and Boulder, Colorado.

South Carolina state Senator Tom Corbin (R) details his bill to protect citizens in his state from federal disarmament.

Finally, Glenn tells Americans what they can do at the local level to protect the sacred words "shall not be infringed."

Watch the full episode below:

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