GLENN: I want to show you the most remarkable thing from the speech last night. And it's the Democratic response. I don't know if you heard this. It sounds like it was edited, but it is not. I swear to you. Here's the former governor of Kentucky. Listen to this.
VOICE: I'm a proud Democrat, but first and foremost, I'm a proud Republican and Democrat and mostly American.
STU: What?
(laughter)
PAT: I'm a proud Democrat. And a Republican. And a Republican and a Democrat. And an American.
GLENN: I'm a shoehorn.
PAT: But mostly I'm a Canadian and an American and a Mexican. But I'm a not a human being. I'm an animal. I'm an animal and a human. I'm a human being and a vegetable. But mostly, I'm a fruitcake.
(laughter)
GLENN: That's crazy.
PAT: What the hell is that?
STU: That is weird.
GLENN: That's weird.
PAT: That's great.
GLENN: This guy was just not -- he was like in an old dingy VFW hall. You know?
PAT: Yes. Yes.
GLENN: And it just didn't -- and it was the opposite of Barack Obama.
PAT: Yeah.
GLENN: Here's this guy who is all folksy and, you know, my folks own a funeral home, and we've been married forever and we live in Dawson's Creek which I think was a TV show.
STU: Yes.
GLENN: And we're just folksy, and look, a guy behind me has got a banjo and somebody is playing bingo.
PAT: Bizarre.
GLENN: I mean, it was just the exact opposite of the Democratic Party under Barack Obama. I don't even understand it.
PAT: I -- think they're trying to go for a feel -- Stu brought up off the air that they're learning a lesson from Bobby Jindal, whose career was seemingly destroyed by giving the rebuttal to the Democrats.
GLENN: And so they're just letting people destroy themselves who don't matter?
STU: Yeah.
PAT: Yeah. This guy is already -- he's 115 years old. Put him out there. He's done with his career. Let him give the rebuttal.
STU: Right.
GLENN: I am shocked that they don't hire somebody from Hollywood just to say, "Hi, I'm just a regular American, and I want to talk to you about the Democratic response." And they just hire some Hollywood guy to just do it and knock it out of the park.
PAT: Right.
GLENN: Or get somebody -- now, they would never do this because it would be the end of their career and they would have to do politics, but get somebody like Tom Hanks. I mean, I don't know why they haven't gone that road.
STU: Yeah, it's certainly not working the way it's going.
PAT: And you know they'd do it.
JEFFY: Oh, yeah.
STU: You're a stagecraft guy though, Glenn. You come off of that room. The dual session of Congress, in front of that audience with applause and everything else. And then you cut to what that lives up to that?
Nothing. I mean, I don't know what --
GLENN: Oh, I could stagecraft something. But I would not put it in a VFW hall with an 800-year-old man and an all-white audience. I mean, I just would not -- that just would not go well. We're going to the history of Texas and our serial, next.