Big News for Animal Masseuses, Auctioneers and Fishing Guides

The market in Washington state is flooded with jobs requiring a license --- animal masseuse, auctioneer, boxing announcer, fishing guide, landscape architect, manicurist and horse floater, to name a few. They just can't keep up with the demand.

"So here's the thing, Washington is deciding now in the Washington House of Representatives . . . that they have too many people applying for a license. They don't need to have everybody applying for a license. So those occupations are targeted for de-licensing," Glenn said Wednesday on radio.

Which, of course, begs the question, Why was a license needed in the first place?"

"Now, what a ridiculous premise and world we live in, that an animal masseuse, up until this thing supposedly passes, needed to have a license," co-host Stu Burguiere said insightfully.

Listen to this segment from The Glenn Beck Program:

GLENN:  Excuse me.  Excuse me.  I have some big news.  I have some big news if you're an animal masseuse.

(chuckling)

Now, I don't know how many animal masseuses there are in our listening audience

STU:  Well, we're the number three biggest talk radio show, but we're the number two among animal masseuses.

GLENN:  Are we?  

STU:  Yes.  

GLENN:  I would like to talk to an animal masseuse.  A licensed animal masseuse.

STU:  Only licensed animal masseuses can be members of the National Association of Animal Masseuses.

GLENN:  If you are an animal masseuse, an auctioneer, a boxing announcer, a fishing guide, a landscape architect, manicurist, or horse floater --

STU:  That sounds dirty.  I'll be honest, that sounds dirty.

GLENN:  What?

STU:  I don't know what that is.  Jeffy probably does.

GLENN:  It's like a fluffer for horse porn?

STU:  That's kind of what it sounds like, right?

JEFFY:  Depending on what sites you go to?

GLENN:  What is a horse floater?

STU:  We actually did discover this on Pat and Stu the other day.  It appears to be something equivalent to a horse dentist.

PAT:  Kind of.  Yeah.

JEFFY:  They call it a horse floater because the float is the file they file the horses teeth down with.

PAT:  And why that's called a file, no one knows.

JEFFY:  We don't know.

GLENN:  So here's the thing:  Washington is deciding now -- in the Washington House of Representatives, so this is Washington state, that they have too many people applying for license.  They don't need to have everybody apply for a license.  So those --

JEFFY:  That doesn't sound like government.

GLENN:  -- occupations are targeted for de-licensing.

STU:  Now, what a ridiculous premise and world we live in, that an animal masseuse -- up until this thing supposedly passes, needed to have a license.

GLENN:  Or a landscape architect.

STU:  Yeah, you judge them by their work.

GLENN:  Now, hang on just a second.  Maybe a landscape architect because maybe on huge projects, they could cause mudslides or things like that, if they don't know what they're doing with the land.

PAT:  They could also mess up your property if they don't what an they're doing.

GLENN:  But that's your property.

PAT:  Yeah.

GLENN:  Depending on the scale of things.  But an animal masseuse.  Come on.  I need a license to be an animal masseuse.

GLENN:  What is that?  Is that in case the animals are walking down.  I don't know.  That looks like a shady massage parlor.

JEFFY:  Well, some states won't even let you do it if you have -- if you've gone to school for horse massage.  Then they make you go back to become a veterinarian so that you actually have a license to be able to massage the horses.  Just saying.

STU:  Jeffy knows too much about this.

GLENN:  My grandpa was a jack-of-all-trades.  He did a little bit of everything.

STU:  Horse floating?

GLENN:  He probably did.  He was a vet, but he wasn't a vet.  He was an auctioneer, but he wasn't -- I remember him doing the big cattle auctions.  And he could do the whole -- he could do all that.  He didn't have a license for that.  He was a sheriff.  He worked -- he was a machinist.  He worked for Boeing.

STU:  You do need a license to be a sheriff.

GLENN:  Yes.  No, but I'm saying --

JEFFY:  You don't.  A sheriff, that's an elected office.

PAT:  Think of all the people --

GLENN:  You don't go to school for it.

STU:  You need a badge.

GLENN:  You need a badge.

STU:  That's the thing.

GLENN:  But why would you need a license to be an animal masseuse?  Are you good at it or not?

STU:  Right.  And, first of all, who is going to answer?  The horse?  Because that's the one that would need to know.  I don't know how they would know if you're good.

JEFFY:  Well, the owner would.

STU:  How would the owner --

JEFFY:  If you have an animal, you know the animal --

GLENN:  I'll tell you, I'll sit in the stall smoking cigarettes and watching Amazon, and then someone will knock on the door, you almost done?  

Yep, almost done in here.  

STU:  And the horse is like, I know you're not going to massage.  

GLENN:  He's loving it.  He's loving it.

STU:  Another crazy one on there that we haven't mentioned is boxing announcer.

GLENN:  Yeah, why?

STU:  So you can announce football or baseball without a license, but for boxing you've got to have a license.  That's really important.  Well, you know if it's the right hand or the left hand.  You got to tell.  Take the test and let us know.  I mean, that is ridiculous.

GLENN:  See, in my -- in my -- when I first got into it -- and Pat too, and I bet you too, Jeffy.

JEFFY:  Yeah.  Yes.

GLENN:  We used to have what was called our third phone license.  Yeah, your third class license.

JEFFY:  To get in.

GLENN:  And it was a radio telephone license.  That's why it was called your third phone.  First phone meant you could fix the transmitter.  But you had to have certain basic understanding of how the transmitter worked to be able to on the radio.

STU:  Right.  Which is a bad practice which ended.

GLENN:  Yes.

PAT:  You had to know if the station was in compliance with its effective radiated power at all times.

GLENN:  Correct.  Correct.

PAT:  Now, I forget that formula a good time ago.  But they eliminated that too a long time ago.

JEFFY:  Yeah.

PAT:  Yeah.

GLENN:  So now you don't need to have a license.  But I will tell you that I talked to Ted Koppel, and he said maybe we should have a license for journalists.  Maybe you shouldn't just be able to post things online, you shouldn't just be able to start a blog without a license --

STU:  That's the progressive mindset, though, right?

JEFFY:  Right.  That sure is.

GLENN:  It is.

STU:  The mindset is, it's only legitimate if there's a license.  The government gives it its legitimacy.  And that's where the complete split it.

GLENN:  And here's the problem:  I was talking to a friend of mine.  He said, you know, Glenn, you know, I know -- you know, I know if you're into liberty and freedom, but there are some things that we all have to agree on.  For instance,, you know, schooling.  Schooling, I mean, you know, you say that you want freedom of choice to be able to go into whatever school you want.  But, Glenn, most people are not smart enough to figure out what school their kids need.

And I said, wow, is --

PAT:  Such a progressive frame of mind.  

GLENN:  Is that an awful frame of mind.  

JEFFY:  No kidding.  

PAT:  We're the parent.

GLENN:  First of all, most people -- most people absolutely are smart enough.  There's no need for them to even think about it because my job is to just put you up at the bus stop.  So I stopped thinking about it.  Do they know what's right for their kid?  Yeah, when their responsibility is given back to them and you're responsible for raising that kid.  Yeah, they are smart enough to figure that out.  And I said to that person, so what happens if I was in charge and I thought you were putting your kid in the wrong school?  Should I be able to say that you're not smart?  Well, no.  Because I'm smart enough to figure that out.

Oh.

STU:  Hmm.  And that's the thing.  Conservatism.  That thing.  And progressivism breaks down when you say -- when you think you can make that choice.  Because the point is to allow the person who actually is stupid to make the stupid choice.  That's okay.  It's their freaking life.  And if that's what they want to do with their life, they want to make continual stupid choices, as I point at Jeffy, that is okay.  You have to be able to let go and let that happen sometimes.

We did our homework over the weekend; we did the research so we can tell you what is likely coming from Senate Democrats regarding President Trump's Supreme Court Nominee Amy Coney Barrett. Based on our research and the anonymous people who have already come forward to talk about Coney Barrett's youth, these are the main shocking things you can expect Senate Democrats to seize on during the confirmation process…

A man has come forward under the banner of "#MenToo," to say that in second grade, Amy Coney Barrett and her best friend at the time, cornered him at a birthday party at Chuck-E-Cheese and "injected him with a full dose of cooties." Which, if true, would obviously be disqualifying for serving on the highest court in the land.

Then there's a woman who says when she was nine-years-old, she lived on the same street as Amy Coney Barrett. She alleges that Coney-Barrett borrowed her VHS tape of Herbie Goes Bananas and did not return it for at least six months. And then when she did finally get the tape back, the woman says Coney Barrett did not even bother to rewind it. The FBI has interviewed at least two witnesses so far who say the tape was indeed not rewound and that it was very upsetting to the owner of the tape. Again, if true, this is troubling – clearly not the kind of integrity you want to see in a Supreme Court justice.

Apparently, in their elementary school days, they liked to drink milk – and lots of it.

The same neighbor also dropped a bombshell allegation about the drinking problem of Amy Coney Barrett and her closest friends. Apparently, in their elementary school days, they liked to drink milk – and lots of it. The neighbor says she "frequently" witnessed Coney-Barrett and her friends chugging entire cartons of milk – often Whole Milk, sometimes Chocolate Milk, occasionally both at the same time through a funnel.

Unfortunately, shooting-up cooties, injurious rewinding, and potential calcium-abuse are not even the worst of it.

A third person has now come forward, another man, and this is just reprehensible, it's hard to even fathom. But he alleges that in fourth grade, when they were around ten-years-old, Amy Coney Barrett and a group of "four or five of her friends" gang-GRAPED him on the playground during recess. He alleges the group of friends snuck uneaten grapes out of the cafeteria and gang-GRAPED him repeatedly in broad daylight. In other words, and I hate to have to spell this out because it's kind of graphic, but the group led by ten-year-old Amy Coney Barrett pelted this poor defenseless boy with whole grapes. He recalls them "laughing the whole time" as they were gang-GRAPING him.

He recalls them "laughing the whole time" as they were gang-GRAPING him.

Obviously, even if just one of these allegations is half-true, no Senator with a conscience could possibly vote to confirm Coney Barrett. When there is a clear pattern of destructive childhood behavior, it always continues into adulthood. Because people do not change. Ever.

Fortunately, for the sake of the Republic, Democrats plan to subpoena Coney Barrett's childhood diary, to see what, if any, insights it may provide into her calcium habits, as well as her abuse of illicit cooties and the gang-GRAPING incident.

We will keep you posted on the latest, but for now, it looks like Democrats will find plenty in the reckless pre-teen life of Amy Coney Barrett to cast doubt on her nomination. And if not, they can always fall back on her deranged preference for letting babies be born.

[NOTE: The preceding was a parody written by MRA writer Nathan Nipper.]

On the radio program Friday, Glenn Beck discussed the recent news that a primary source for the Steele Dossier — the document on which much of the Trump-Russia collusion investigation was based — had been investigated by the FBI for contacts with suspected Russian spies. Glenn also shared several previously unpublished texts and emails from FBI agents have recently been released.

According to a letter sent by Attorney General William Barr to Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) on Thursday, the FBI knew early on that the research compiled by ex-British intelligence agent Christopher Steele relied on a "Primary Sub-source" that had been "the subject of an FBI counterintelligence investigation from 2009 to 2011 that assessed his or her contacts with suspected Russian intelligence officers" — but still used it to obtain warrants to spy on former Trump campaign-aide Carter Page.

But, it gets even worse. Now, new leaked texts and communications from FBI agents within the department at the time of the entire Russian collusion effort were disclosed in federal court filings on Thursday. According to the court documents, FBI agents purchased "professional liability insurance" to protect themselves in January 2017, just weeks before Donald Trump was inaugurated president, because they were concerned about the agency's potentially illegal activity during the Russia collusion investigation.

"Trump was right," one FBI employee wrote in response to then-President-elect Trump's Jan 3, 2017 tweet which read: "The 'Intelligence' briefing on so-called 'Russian hacking' was delayed until Friday, perhaps more time needed to build a case. Very strange!"

Watch the video below for more details:

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Chief researcher Jason Buttrill joined Glenn Beck on the radio program Thursday to discuss an "explosive" new report released Wednesday by Senate Republicans on Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden's son, Hunter Biden, and the Ukrainian energy company Burisma.

Among other serious allegations, the 87-page report claims that "Hunter Biden received a $3.5 million wire transfer from Elena Baturina, the wife of the former mayor of Moscow," and the richest woman in Russia.

"The transactions discussed [in the report] are designed to illustrate the depth and extent of some questionable financial transactions. Moreover, the financial transactions illustrate serious counterintelligence and extortion concerns relating to Hunter Biden and his family," the report stated.

Jason suggested the Senate's findings provide additional evidence to back allegations of a money-laundering scheme, which Glenn detailed in a four-part series about Biden's shady connections to Ukraine. Learn more on this here.

"Laundered money is very hard to track to its finality," Jason explained. "I'm sure the Biden camp is really hoping that it just looks suspicious, but [investigators] don't ever find the eventual end point. But, if they do – and it's possible they already have – this is going to be explosive, very explosive."

Watch the video below for more details:

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To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.

Revolutions rarely happen overnight. The Left started laying the groundwork for November 3, 2020, the moment Hillary Clinton had to concede the 2016 election to Donald Trump. It was always solely about getting rid of President Trump — and there's a playbook for that.

Last week, Glenn Beck showed you the "Seven Pillars of Color Revolution" written by a former U.S. diplomat, which are the conditions that must be in place for a successful Eastern European-style "Color Revolution." The left seems to be pushing for a Color Revolution this election because they are using the exact same playbook.

In part two of this series, Glenn peels back the layers on the first four of these Color Revolution pillars to show you how they work and what the end goal is. And he reveals one of the architects of the playbook – a Color Revolution specialist, former ambassador, and former Obama administration official who is one of the key masterminds of this revolution.

Joining Glenn is political campaign veteran and BlazeTV host Steve Deace who says the polls that claim Biden is leading the race "are trash." We're being set up to believe that if Trump wins in spite of the polls, it must be an invalid election.

Watch the full video below:


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