GLENN: Well, there's -- there was quite a big announcement on Friday that had nothing to do with Obamacare, had a little something to do with Hillary Clinton's campaign. And that is that Pizzagate has finally been cleared up for all of those people that believed in Pizzagate, and we --
PAT: It, of course, was where Hillary Clinton was running this -- essentially a whorehouse out of a pizza house in Washington --
STU: Child whorehouse.
PAT: Yes. And then there was a series of incredibly complex tunneling underneath where they would come and go. You would see them go in, but never come out, because they went out through the tunnels.
GLENN: Yeah, of course. And, of course, if you ordered like a Hawaiian with extra cheese --
PAT: That meant --
GLENN: I don't know what it meant.
PAT: That you wanted a little Polynesian child.
GLENN: With a little extra chunk to them or something. I don't know.
PAT: I don't know.
STU: Legitimately, they had each --
GLENN: Yeah, they had the whole list. And there's a big announcement from the guy who is, you know, one of the -- one of the lead flag wavers for this.
STU: Oh, no.
ALEX: In issuing this statement, we are not admitting that Mr. Alefantis or his restaurants have any legal claim. We do not believe they do, but we are issuing this statement because we believe it's the right thing to do.
GLENN: It will be no surprise to you that we will fight for children across America.
PAT: That's no surprise at all.
ALEX: But the Pizzagate narrative, at least as concerned Mr. Alefantis at Comet Ping Pong --
PAT: At least as far as concerning him. I mean, the whole thing may be true, outside of this one guy, who is about to sue us into oblivion. But he has nothing to do with this particular thing.
PAT: Everything else is true.
STU: And this is obviously Alex Jones, the ridiculous conspiracy theorist. But obviously, having a severe threat of a lawsuit, as you can tell, he's reading this hostage statement.
PAT: And this was -- this was one of the dumbest conspiracy theories ever devised.
GLENN: Well, he's never met a conspiracy that he doesn't like.
PAT: No, he sure hasn't. Everything is a conspiracy to him. He doesn't even believe in Muslim terror. That's all perpetrated by the government.
PAT: Yeah, he doesn't buy into Muslim terrorists at all.
STU: Oh, 9/11 was an inside job.
STU: That's where it all stems from.
PAT: False flags. We're blaming things on Muslims, so we can go to war with them. That's not a real thing.
GLENN: Okay. All right.
ALEX: We have subsequently determined was based upon what we now believe was an incorrect narrative.
ALEX: Despite the fact that we were far from the genesis of this story, it is never easy to admit when your commentaries are based on inaccurate information.
GLENN: Okay. So wait a minute. So the guy who showed up with a gun at the pizza parlor, I'm hoping he's heard this now too.
GLENN: Alex has said, oops. I guess we were listening to the wrong person.
STU: And to be clear, the guy with the gun figured it out before Alex. Because he left there, realizing there was nothing to it.
GLENN: Yeah, he went there to kill them. And then he realized, I don't think there's a tunnel system underneath --
PAT: Oh, it's just a pizza parlor. Okay.
ALEX: We feel like we owe it to you the listeners, viewers and supporters, to make that statement, and to give an apology and Mr. Alefantis, when we do. We encourage you to hold us accountable because we improve when you do.
GLENN: That's really good.
STU: And this --
GLENN: Here's how -- now, I don't know how seriously he took it. Because he was wearing his shirt when he read that.
JEFFY: Yes, he was.
GLENN: And you know --
PAT: Do we have that confirmed?
GLENN: We have that confirmed. He was wearing his shirt.
JEFFY: He was prepared to take it off.
GLENN: Usually when he really means something, he rips his shirt off.
PAT: He must not have had his steak the night before and wasn't feeling the testosterone.
GLENN: Yeah. Yeah. Was it steak that makes him feel like that?
PAT: It's steak and jalapeño peppers.
STU: Also, wait a minute. What about his supplements? His supplements --
GLENN: It could be that. Or it could just be bipolar roid rage. You know, it could be --
STU: It's possible that they sold so much male vitality formula that they had none left for him. Because, I mean, that could be the problem here. This is a monumentous occasion here. The fact that he -- this is a man who said Sandy Hook didn't happen. It was obviously fake with fake actors.
GLENN: And the children were all fake.
PAT: And he denied saying that, but he's on record saying it.
GLENN: When you say record, you mean YouTube.
STU: But, I mean, that's his record. The point is, he doesn't back down from these things. And you might say, well, hey, it's a good thing. He's finally admitting one of these things is fake. I think it's the exact opposite. The reason he said anything is because he never had any consequences to it. He's now been so mainstreamed by certain members of -- of --
GLENN: Donald Trump.
STU: Donald Trump. That he now is in the position where people care enough about what he says to get lawsuits that he has to apologize for. This is him being mainstreamed and the result of it, which is really a terrible development for our country.
GLENN: This is so -- I mean, you want to talk about conspiracy theories, this -- this pizza thing is just outrageous. And, by the way, his people say that I know about Pizzagate, and I've either been bought off or I'm a part of it.
PAT: So I wonder if they'll maybe back off that claim now.
PAT: I mean, doesn't that illegitimatize everything he said surrounding this Pizzagate nonsense?
GLENN: No, no, because he said --
PAT: At least as it applies to Mr. Cowanakis -- or whatever his name was. Whereas it applies to you, it's still enforced.
GLENN: Oh, I'm sure.
What he's saying here is, I still believe in Pizzagate, just not going through this pizza parlor. There is another one with secret tunnels.
PAT: That is unbelievable.