Vaginas With Voices: Thanks, Bill Nye, for the Worst Moment in Broadcast History

Welcome to 2017, the year of the worst moment in broadcast history which taught us that vaginas can talk. Yes, it actually happened thanks to Bill Nye, the so-called science guy. The only thing that could top it? Glenn's impression of a talking vagina. #NSFW

Listen to this segment from The Glenn Beck Program:

GLENN: Well, here's an episode that I would really like to lose. Because once you -- luckily, it's radio. So you're not going to be able to see this. But as you're listening to it.

PAT: It's unbelievable.

GLENN: Realize it's 100 times worse when you actually are watching it.

PAT: This actually happened on a Netflix original show.

JEFFY: Yes.

GLENN: This is something we feel necessary to say. This actually -- in today's world --

PAT: It really happened.

GLENN: Think of this.

PAT: Happened.

GLENN: In today's world, where honestly, space aliens could -- Anderson Cooper could go on TV tonight and lift up his eyelid and pull it over his head and reveal himself as an alien, and we would be like, "Huh."

JEFFY: Should have seen this one.

GLENN: In this atmosphere, we have to say, this actually happened.

STU: Yeah. I mean, in all seriousness, it's one of the worst three minutes of entertainment put together. And, by the way, we have five of the top ten, so we know --

GLENN: This is our category. We have all of -- yeah, we're lifetime achievement winners when it comes to bad entertainment.

STU: Yes, this is the worst thing I may have ever seen.

PAT: Have you ever seen -- I didn't even know he had a Netflix show, but called Bill Nye Saves the World?

JEFFY: Yeah.

PAT: Who knew? And why the hell did Netflix put him on? What is the draw of this guy? I don't understand it.

GLENN: Okay stop here's Bill Nye the Science Guy. And he's going to introduce something that you, of course, know.

PAT: This is amazing.

GLENN: And warning, kids -- warning, if you have kids in the room --

PAT: Yeah, it's a little harsh.

GLENN: It has dicey language in it. It's all technical science language.

STU: No.

GLENN: But the song is -- remember, and we're the science denier.

PAT: Uh-huh.

GLENN: We're the ones denying science. This is on the science stage this weekend, my vagina has a voice.

VOICE: So you guys, seriously, this next thing I feel is very special.

PAT: It's very special.

VOICE: This is a cool little segment. You know this woman from Crazy Ex-girlfriend. Please give it up for Rachel Bloom.

GLENN: I didn't know Crazy Ex-girlfriend.

PAT: I don't know her, but...

VOICE: This one goes out to all my bipeds who identify as ladies!

PAT: Okay. For all the bipeds who identify as ladies because that's as close as we could come to calling you something that sort of identifies a human being.

GLENN: Women. Okay. So wait. That's what she said? For all you bipeds that identify as ladies.

PAT: Bipeds that identify as ladies.

GLENN: Okay. All right. But we're the science deniers.

(singing)

VOICE: My vagina has its own voice.

PAT: Wow.

(singing)

VOICE: Sometimes I do my voice for my vagina. Please, tell me I'm not the only one who does that.

(laughter)

GLENN: Stop. I believe that laughter is piped in.

PAT: Oh, it had to be.

STU: Really?

GLENN: I believe that --

PAT: I think it had to be.

GLENN: Well, they didn't mic the crowd.

PAT: I don't know if there even is a crowd. Is there a crowd there?

STU: I thought there was a live audience there. I mean, he seems to be talking to them at the beginning. It seems like it's a variety show.

PAT: Is he talking to us at home?

GLENN: I don't know.

PAT: I've never seen the show.

GLENN: I don't know. I've never seen it either.

VOICE: (singing) Much more than either.

PAT: So bad.

VOICE: (singing)

May have some butt stuff. It's evolution. Ain't nothing new.

PAT: Wow.

VOICE: (singing)

(music)

French treasure. 'Cause my sex joke is so (singing) more.

(music)

If they're alive, I'll date them. Channing or Jenna Tatum. I'm down for anything. Don't box in my box. Give someone new a handy and give yourself props.

VOICE: Oh, you think you're so smart. Did you learn gay in college?

VOICE: (singing) with all of that while I drop some knowledge. Sexuality is --

(music)

GLENN: Okay. Stop.

PAT: Has there been anything worst ever broadcast?

STU: Ever. Ever.

PAT: Ever. I don't think so.

GLENN: Yeah, but listen to the message.

PAT: Oh, it's science, Glenn.

GLENN: I know. My vagina has a voice.

PAT: They're singing science.

GLENN: Hey, are you? I'm Bill. Bill the vagina. Yesterday I was Carol. But today I'm Bill the vagina. Taking your calls now. Hello. I'm listening. Go ahead. Yes, Peter. Come in a little closer. What were you saying?

(laughter)

GLENN: I mean, jeez.

STU: Is that the voice she does -- is that the voice she does?

GLENN: How are you doing? Give us a whoa. Let me tell you something.

STU: That is really --

GLENN: I was vomiting out a child the other day. Oh, my gosh. Split my face wide open.

STU: Oh, okay. This is why --

(laughter)

STU: The issue here is -- no.

GLENN: If a vagina could talk, this is what it would be saying.

STU: Okay.

PAT: I think maybe it should stop talking.

STU: Yeah, no. I think that was the good --

GLENN: What, are you ashamed of me?

PAT: Yes.

STU: We are ashamed of you. Yes. Very ashamed of you.

And, again, now we've broken the record of Bill Nye for the worst moment in broadcast history, which I'm glad you reclaimed the title.

GLENN: Holy cow. Right. Thank you.

STU: It's interesting because a lot of people are offended over the content and message of that. Which she's saying -- basically saying I can't be assigned a sex.

PAT: And that's science?

STU: That's science somehow.

PAT: That's science. Jeez, man.

STU: But really, I'm much more offended at how terrible it is. Like, I don't -- they could be saying anything, and I don't think it would overcome just how awful a production it is.

PAT: No, it's unbelievably bad.

STU: It's horrific. What could they possibly have been thinking?

GLENN: You're still freaking out that my vagina has a voice.

STU: No, I know. I am.

GLENN: But my butthole has a stink beyond your wildest imagination.

STU: You've set the record already. You don't need to further it. This is like --

GLENN: Whoa. Whoa.

(laughter)

STU: This is like, you've already scored 101 points. You don't need to go for 130. Wilt. It's like, let's just calm down.

(laughter)

GLENN: Wow.

STU: That is absolutely unbelievable though. I mean, I seriously -- how in good conscience as a person who works in the entertainment industry, how could you let that on the air? That's something you light fire to the tapes before they get it to Netflix?

GLENN: No, here's the thing -- here's the thing: Netflix has spent a lot of money on that. There's nobody at Netflix that goes, yeah, well, my head has a mouth. And my mouth has a voice. You're fired. Get out. Get out.

STU: Well, I think the point with Netflix is, it's not like they're broadcasting -- this is -- it's the benefit of Netflix. They could put a bunch of crap on there too. They have a lot of great points.

GLENN: Yeah, but at some point, doesn't some shareholder go, come on?

JEFFY: And they might. They might. This is one season.

STU: But this doesn't cancel -- no one cancels a subscription over this, do they?

GLENN: No, no. Because there's so many other great shows. And so maybe it brings in some crazy nutjob liberal that subscribes and thinks it good. Maybe Bill Nye -- someone in Bill Nye's family subscribes because of this show.

GLENN: But here's the -- here's the problem: This is why -- I mean, are you seeing anybody who is conservative? Crazy, doing a show like that.

STU: No. And thank God!

GLENN: No, I know that. But they'll put anything on as long as it's liberal. As long as it's liberal, progressive, it doesn't matter. You know, the idea that the left has gone over after Fox News -- you're only thinning the herd. By making -- by making conservative views a pariah. What you do is you only allow the strongest or the craziest to stand.

And so we -- we'll stand. I'm telling you, we're going to continue to stand, even if I have to do it under a tree. I'm going to be doing -- I'm going to be saying my view under a tree, if it's only with three people. That's okay. You're not shutting me up. But the ones who last -- after you clear out -- if you make it uncomfortable for the normal people to say something, the only ones that are left are the truly dedicated or the nutjobs that will just get some other nutjob to pay for it.

STU: Well, that and, of course, obviously all the vaginas with voices. They'll always speak out. They're always there to speak out to America.

GLENN: Yeah. My vagina has a voice, but conservatives don't.

We should write a song.

STU: My vagina has a voice, but conservatives don't.

PAT: May have just broken the V-word record of all time too, right here.

GLENN: No, no. I don't believe so.

STU: It's possible. Again, in a science discussion, these things are allowed.

PAT: Pretty close.

Rapper Kendrick Lamar brings white fan onstage to sing with him, but here’s the catch

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images for American Express

Rapper Kendrick Lamar asked a fan to come onstage and sing with him, only to condemn her when she failed to censor all of the song's frequent mentions of the “n-word" while singing along.

RELATED: You'll Never Guess Who Wrote the Racist Message Targeting Black Air Force Cadets

“I am so sorry," she apologized when Lamar pointed out that she needed to “bleep" that word. “I'm used to singing it like you wrote it." She was booed at by the crowd of people, many screaming “f*** you" after her mistake.

On Tuesday's show, Pat and Jeffy watched the clip and talked about some of the Twitter reactions.

“This is ridiculous," Pat said. “The situation with this word has become so ludicrous."

What happened?

MSNBC's Katy Tur didn't bother to hide her pro-gun control bias in an interview with Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton in the wake of the Santa Fe High School killings.

RELATED: Media Are Pushing Inflated '18 School Shootings' Statistic. Here Are the Facts.

What did she ask?

As Pat pointed out while sitting in for Glenn on today's show, Tur tried to “badger" Paxton into vowing that he would push for a magical fix that will make schools “100 percent safe." She found it “just wild" that the Texas attorney general couldn't promise that schools will ever be completely, totally safe.

“Can you promise kids in Texas today that they're safe to go to school?" Tur pressured Paxton.

“I don't think there's any way to say that we're ever 100 percent safe," the attorney general responded.

What solutions did the AG offer?

“We've got a long way to go," Paxton said. He listed potential solutions to improve school safety, including installing security officers and training administrators and teachers to carry a gun.

Pat's take:

“Unbelievable," Pat said on today's show. “Nobody can promise [100 percent safety]."

Every president from George Washington to Donald Trump has issued at least one executive order (with the exception of William Harrison who died just 31 days into his presidency) and yet the U.S. Constitution doesn't even mention executive orders. So how did the use of this legislative loophole become such an accepted part of the job? Well, we can thank Franklin Roosevelt for that.

Back at the chalkboard, Glenn Beck broke down the progression of the executive order over the years and discussed which US Presidents have been the “worst offenders."

RELATED: POWER GRAB: Here's how US presidents use 'moments of crisis' to override Constitutional law

“It's hard to judge our worst presidential overreachers on sheer numbers alone," said Glenn. “However, it's not a shock that FDR issued by far the most of any president."

Our first 15 presidents issued a combined total of 143. By comparison, Franklin D. Roosevelt issued 3721, more than twice the next runner up, Woodrow Wilson, at 1803.

“Next to FDR, no other president in our history attempted to reshape so much of American life by decree, until we get to this guy: President Obama," Glenn explained. “He didn't issue 3000, or even 1800; he did 276 executive orders, but it was the power of those orders. He instituted 560 major regulations classified by the Congressional Budget Office as having 'significant economic or social impacts.' That's 50 percent more regulations than George W. Bush's presidency — and remember, everybody thought he was a fascist."

President Obama blamed an obstructionist Congress for forcing him to bypass the legislative process. By executive order, President Obama decreed the U.S. join the Paris Climate Accord, DACA, the Clean Power Plan and transgender restrooms. He also authorized spying in US citizens through section 702 of FISA, used the IRS to target political opponents and ordered military action in Libya without Congressional permission.

All of these changes were accepted by the very people who now condemn President Trump for his use of executive orders — many of which were issued to annul President Obama's executive orders, just as President Obama annulled President Bush's executive orders when he took office … and therein lies the rub with executive orders.

“That's not the way it's supposed to work, nor would we ever want it to be," said Glenn. “We have to have the Constitution and laws need to originate in Congress."

Watch the video above to find out more.

Six months ago, I alerted readers to the very attractive benefits that the TreasuryDirect program offers to investors who are defensively sitting on cash right now.

Since then, those benefits have continued to improve. Substantially.

Back in November, by holding extremely conservative short-term (i.e., 6-months or less) Treasury bills, TreasuryDirect participants were receiving over 16x more in interest payments vs keeping their cash in a standard bank savings account.

Today, they're now receiving over 30 times more. Without having to worry about the risk of a bank "bail-in" or failure.

So if you're holding cash right now and NOT participating in the TreasuryDirect program, do yourself a favor and read on. If you're going to pass on this opportunity, at least make it an 'eyes-wide-open' decision.

Holding Cash (In Treasurys) Now Beats The Market

There are many prudent reasons to hold cash in today's dangerously overvalued financial markets, as we've frequently touted here at PeakProsperity.com.

Well, there's now one more good reason to add to the list: holding cash in short-term Treasurys is now meeting/beating the dividend returns offered by the stock market:

"Cash Is King" Again - 3-Month Bills Yield More Than Stocks (Zero Hedge)
'Reaching for yield' just got a lot easier...
For the first time since February 2008, three-month Treasury bills now have a yield advantage over the S&P; 500 dividend yield (and dramatically lower risk).
Investors can earn a guaranteed 1.90% by holding the 3-month bills or a risky 1.89% holding the S&P; 500...

The longest period of financial repression in history is coming to an end...

And it would appear TINA is dead as there is now an alternative.

And when you look at the total return (dividends + appreciation) of the market since the start of 2018, stocks have returned only marginally better than 3-month Treasurys. Plus, those scant few extra S&P; points have come with a LOT more risk.

Why take it under such dangerously overvalued conditions?

If You Can't Beat 'Em, Join 'Em

In my June report Less Than Zero: How The Fed Killed Saving, I explained how the Federal Reserve's policy of holding interest rates at record lows has decimated savers. Those who simply want to park money somewhere "safe" can't do so without losing money in real terms.

To drive this point home: back in November, the average interest rate being offered in a US bank savings account was an insutling 0.06%. Six months later, nothing has changed:

(Source

That's virtually the same as getting paid 0%. But it's actually worse than that, because once you take inflation into account, the real return on your savings is markedly negative.

And to really get your blood boiling, note that the Federal Reserve has rasied the federal funds rate it pays banks from 1.16% in November to 1.69% in April. Banks are now making nearly 50% more money on the excess reserves they park at the Fed -- but are they passing any of that free profit along to their depositors? No....

This is why knowing about the TreasuryDirect program is so important. It's a way for individual investors savvy enough to understand the game being played to bend some of its rules to their favor and limit the damage they suffer.

Below is an updated version (using today's rates) of my recap of TreasuryDirect, which enables you to get over 30x more interest on your cash savings than your bank will pay you, with lower risk.

TreasuryDirect

For those not already familiar with it, TreasuryDirect is a service offered by the United States Department of the Treasury that allows individual investors to purchase Treasury securities such as T-Bills, notes and bonds directly from the U.S. government.

You purchase these Treasury securities by linking a TreasuryDirect account to your personal bank account. Once linked, you use your cash savings to purchase T-bills, etc from the US Treasury. When the Treasury securities you've purchased mature or are sold, the proceeds are deposited back into your bank account.

So why buy Treasuries rather than keep your cash savings in a bank? Two main reasons:

  • Much higher return: T-Bills are currently offering an annualized return rate between 1.66-2.04%. Notes and bonds, depending on their duration, are currently offering between 2.6% - 3.1%
  • Extremely low risk: Your bank can change the interest rate on your savings account at any time -- with Treasury bills, your rate of return is locked in at purchase. Funds in a bank are subject to risks such as a bank bail-in or the insolvency of the FDIC depositor protection program -- while at TreasuryDirect, your funds are being held with the US Treasury, the institution with the lowest default risk in the country for reasons I'll explain more in a moment.

Let's look at a quick example. If you parked $100,000 in the average bank savings account for a full year, you would earn $60 in interest. Let's compare this to the current lowest-yielding TreasuryDirect option: continuously rolling that same $100,000 into 4-week T-Bills for a year:

  1. Day 1: Funds are transferred from your bank account to TreasuryDirect to purchase $100,000 face value of 4-week T-Bills at auction yielding 1.68%
  2. Day 28: the T-Bills mature and the Treasury holds the full $100,000 proceeds in your TreasuryDirect account. Since you've set up the auto-reinvestment option, TreasuryDirect then purchases another $100,000 face value of 4-week T-Bills at the next auction.
  3. Days 29-364: the process repeats every 4 weeks
  4. Day 365: assuming the average yield for T-Bills remained at 1.68%, you will have received $1,680 in interest in total throughout the year from the US Treasury.

$1,680 vs $60. That's a 27x difference in return.

And the comparison only improves if you decide to purchase longer duration (13-week or 26-week) bills instead of the 4-week ones:

Repeating the above example for a year using 13-week bills would yield $1,925. Using 26-week bills would yield $2,085. A lot better (34x better!) than $60.

Opportunity Cost & Default Risk

So what are the downsides to using TreasuryDirect? There aren't many.

The biggest one is opportunity cost. While your money is being held in a T-Bill, it's tied up at the US Treasury. If you suddenly need access to those funds, you have to wait until the bill matures.

But T-Bill durations are short. 4 weeks is not a lot of time to have to wait. (If you think the probability is high you may to need to pull money out of savings sooner than that, you shouldn't be considering the TreasuryDirect program.)

Other than that, TreasuryDirect offers an appealing reduction in risk.

If your bank suddenly closes due to a failure, any funds invested in TreasuryDirect are not in your bank account, so are not subject to being confiscated in a bail-in.

Instead, your money is held as a T-Bill, note or bond, which is essentially an obligation of the US Treasury to pay you in full for the face amount. The US Treasury is the single last entity in the country (and quite possibly, the world) that will ever default on its obligations. Why? Because Treasurys are the mechanism by which money is created in the US. Chapter 8 from The Crash Course explains:

As a result, to preserve its ability to print the money it needs to function, the US government will bring its full force and backing to bear in order to ensure confidence in the market for Treasurys.

Meaning: the US government won't squelch on paying you back the money you lent it. If required, it will just print the money it needs to repay you.

So, How To Get Started?

Usage of TreasuryDirect is quite low among investors today. Many are unaware of the program. Others simply haven't tried it out.

And let's be real: it's crazy that we live in a world where a 1.68-2.09% return now qualifies as an exceptionally high yield on savings. A lot of folks just can't get motivated to take action by rates that low. But that doesn't mean that they shouldn't -- money left on the table is money forfeited.

So, if you're interested in learning more about the TreasuryDirect program, start by visiting their website. Like everything operated by the government, it's pretty 'no frills'; but their FAQ page addresses investors' most common questions.

Before you decide whether or not to fund an account there, be sure to discuss the decision with your professional financial advisor to make sure it fits well with your personal financial situation and goals. (If you're having difficulty finding a good one, consider scheduling a free discussion with PeakProsperity.com's endorsed financial advisor -- who has considerable experience managing TreasuryDirect purchases for many of its clients).

In Part 2: A Primer On How To Use TreasuryDirect, we lay out the step-by-step process for opening, funding and transacting within a TreasuryDirect account. We've created it to be a helpful resource for those self-directed individuals potentially interested in increasing their return on their cash savings in this manner.

Yes, we savers are getting completely abused by our government's policies. So there's some poetic justice in using the government's own financing instruments to slightly lessen the sting of the whip.

Click here to read Part 2 of this report (free executive summary, enrollment required for full access)

NOTE: PeakProsperity.com does not have any business relationship with the TreasuryDirect program. Nor is anything in the article above to be taken as an offer of personal financial advice. As mentioned, discuss any decision to participate in TreasuryDirect with your professional financial advisor before taking action.