Three Things You Need to Know – February 5, 2018

The Memo is Released

The FISA memo bomb has been dropped. It pretty much confirmed everything Republicans had been talking about in interviews for the past two weeks. If you watched cable news last week you pretty much know everything that’s in the memo. Is that why the information was a little - I don't know - underwhelming? For being billed as a memo full of classified information, I struggled to find anything in it that could be considered damaging to national security. That makes the Democrats, FBI and DoJ look kind of ridiculous in trying to block it’s release.

But it also makes Republicans look a little ridiculous in all the build up and hype that led up to Friday’s release. Now, don’t get me wrong, the information within the memo is interesting. The GOP is accusing the FBI and DoJ of lying to the FISA court in order to get a warrant for former Trump advisor Carter Page. They claim that the Steele Dossier was listed in the initial FISA application, but the roles of Fusion GPS, the DNC and the Clinton campaign were never mentioned. If that’s true then the FBI and DoJ were knowingly trying to pass off partisan opposition research as actual intelligence, AND they hid the truth from the court, not once, but four times.

This all looks really bad, but it’s also only half of the story. Democrats have written their own rebuttal memo, and a vote for its release is expected later today. We can also expect to hear from the FBI AND DoJ at some point as well. Will The Great Memo Wars of 2018 reveal anything new, or will it descend into a giant “liar liar pants on fire” slap fight? Either way, more transparency is still the answer. So get ready for a flood of memos. This is either going to be very enlightening, or brutally painful.

Powerful Super Bowl Ads

A beautiful newborn baby cries and fidgets in her hospital bed. She is perfect. A nurse lifts her up to comfort her. It’s revealed that the child is missing both legs below the knee and one arm.

She is still perfect.

Toyota hit the ball out of the park with its compelling Super Bowl commercial about Paralympic Gold Medalist Lauren Woolstencroft. In 60 seconds, we saw her birth, her struggles to use her mechanical limbs, her failures, and her victories.

People who believe in eugenics see no quality of life for those born with deformities. How can they possibly think that after watching Lauren thrive and go on to win eight gold medals?

In that one minute, Toyota showed the world that all life matters. It’s important to note that no cars are mentioned in the ad, because that wasn’t the point. Toyota is transitioning into a “mobility company” and they wanted to show that the technology they are developing will help humanity.

Dodge also opted to showcase their new technology, but the carmaker was heavily criticized for their commercial.

The commercial featured a new Dodge Ram truck helping bring supplies and volunteers to communities hit by natural disasters. The controversial part? Dodge used Martin Luther King, Jr’s speech on serving in the background.

People were outraged that Dodge would use MLK’s words to sell cars.

I don’t see it that way.

I think anytime Martin Luther King Jr’s words are broadcast and remembered is a good thing.

We need to hear his words, especially now.

Yes, Dodge is selling their new Ram, but they are also selling what you can do with that vehicle: Serve others.

In 120 seconds, the Toyota and Dodge commercials conveyed the message that advancements in technology can be used for good—it’s up to us to use it that way.

The Gender-Neutralization of 'O Canada'

If progressivism is a disease, Canada is terminally ill with it. The U.S. prognosis is probably critical condition.

On Wednesday, Canada’s Senate approved changing a line in the English version of their national anthem, “O Canada,” to make it gender neutral. The second line of the anthem will now be “True patriot love in all of us command” rather than the oppressive, insanely offensive old version, “True patriot love in all thy sons command.”

Now that their anthem isn’t sexist anymore, Canadians can finally feel free to sing it again.

Somehow, I doubt the Canadian senators checked with the people because that’s not how progressives operate. I bet most Canadians would’ve preferred leaving the anthem alone. They’ve had the song that way for over a century and no one died of sexism because of it.

Canadian feminist author Margaret Atwood was one of the people behind this effort. She wrote the novel The Handmaid’s Tale. You can look that one up for insight into her feelings on tradition, faith, and conservatism. She’s real subtle.

This is the dark side of progressivism everywhere – it presumes to know what’s best for the people. But it’s always the agenda of a few, forced on the majority. Or sometimes the agenda, or feelings of just one individual. Progressivism thinks it is promoting more freedom, when often it is tyranny. So, you get things like Michelle Obama dictating to your local school what cafeteria food it can serve. Or one mother in Webster Parish, Louisiana who recently got student-led prayer banned at her daughter’s high school.

Respect for tradition as a stabilizing, enriching agent in society is one of the key diverging points of the Left and Right in the U.S. Decades of progressivism chipping away at things like religion, the flag, the Constitution, and patriotism in general, all the way to Obama’s apologizing tour of a presidency, has created an enormous backlash from heartland Americans. To the point that a whole section of Trump’s State of the Union speech was a lecture on respecting the flag, anthem, and motto. It’s just sad that we’ve sunk so low that the State of the Union has turned into a pep rally about who has more team spirit.

It’s easy to laugh at those Canadians for wimping out on their anthem. But progressivism is a persistent disease, so don’t think it can’t happen here.

MORE 3 THINGS

Somebody might want to check the temperature in hell, it might be just a tad chillier than normal.

If you missed Friday's episode of The Glenn Beck Program, you missed something you probably never thought you'd see in this timeline or any other. Glenn actually donned President Trump's trademark red "Make America Great Again" hat and laid out the case for why he thinks Trump will win in a landslide in 2020.

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Bottom line: Nancy Pelosi and the mainstream media may have pushed Glenn to this point, but believe it or not, Trump's record will make this next election a walk in the park for number 45. At this point, the sitting president has done enough to earn even Glenn's vote.

Glenn broke down what he thought were the 10 biggest campaign promises that — unlike those made by most politicians — Trump actually kept.

10. Impose a 10% repatriation tax to bring jobs back to America

Not all of Trump's promises were good ones, but regardless of what the consequences may be — he did keep this one.

"Now, I think this one is dangerous," Glenn said on radio Friday. "He did it. Ten percent. Bring all of your money back into the United States. It will create jobs. Yes. It will also create inflation. But it's creating jobs."

9. Withdraw from the Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP)

This has been one of Trump's most passionate issues.

"The stop the TPP. Uh-huh. Right. Sure you are. Uh-huh. Yes. He did," Glenn admitted.

8. Withdraw from the disastrous Paris Climate Accord

Glenn found himself eating crow on this.

"I'm on record saying he will never do that because his daughter is a huge global warming person and he only listens to the family. Eh. Wrong," Glenn said with a puff of crow feathers coming from his mouth.

7. Bring North Korea to the table and rein them in

This looked impossible. Not so.

"'I'm going to bring North Korea to the table.' Are you? Everybody has tried to do that," Glenn said. "Now, they're at the table. We don't know what's going to happen. So the result of that is unknown. But has anybody else done that?"

6. Stop over-regulation and jump-start the economy

It's the economy, stupid.

"Does anybody feel like America is beginning to get on track somewhat economically? You know why? Because he fulfilled another promise," Glenn said. "Stop over-regulating the American people. Give them their money. Give the companies the opportunity to expand and bring their money back into the country, and maybe they'll build buildings. Maybe they'll build offices. Maybe they'll build new products. Maybe they'll build new factories. Maybe they'll hire a bunch of people."

Glenn went on.

"Now, I know Seattle is trying to do everything they can to make sure everybody in their city is homeless and unemployed, but the rest of the country is enjoying the feeling of, wow, maybe things are going to be okay."

5. Reverse Obama's executive orders

If you're like Glenn, you've gotten used to politicians promising "no new taxes," but you can really tell they're lying if their lips are moving. Guess what? That's apparently not Trump.

"The executive orders? Yeah. He's reversed a lot of Obama's executive orders," Glenn said. "These are outrageous promises."

4. Pull out of the Iran nuclear deal

No big deal...

"'I'm going to cancel the Iran Deal.' Yep. None of these are small. You know, I've got maybe ten minutes. I think we can get that done in the first term. And they did," Glenn said.

3. Give tax cuts to middle-class Americans

Maybe this could have been better, but we'll take it.

"I don't like the tax cut. I think he could go a lot further," Glenn said. "But that's not even his job. His job is to sign things that Congress puts in front of him. Not to design it. You Republicans in Congress, you disgust me. You disgust me. 'Imagine what we could do if we had the House and the Senate and the White House.' I can imagine what you'll do — nothing. You'll do nothing."

2. Change strategy and defeat ISIS

The mainstream media have been radio silent on this.

"How about the president's — well, I know I can defeat ISIS. I know I can do it. I'll defeat ISIS. He did," Glenn said. "And did you notice no one in the press even talked about it? All of a sudden, we're not talking about ISIS anymore. How come? Oh, I know. President Trump. That's why."

1. Recognize Jerusalem as the capital of Israel and relocate the US embassy

This one is a true game-changer.

"Now, every president will say to you, when he's running, 'I'm going to make Jerusalem the home.' Well, really? The home of the embassy. Really, are you? Because everybody says that, nobody does it. He did it," Glenn said. "And I think that's going to go down as the biggest game-changer possibly in my lifetime. This is going — it already is — it is changing the game in Iran."

Glenn continued.

"And when it does, this president is going to come out and say something directly to those people, that we support them," he said. "And that's going to add fuel to the fire. And you might see a regime change and a collapse of the Islamic regime in Iran. And it will be 100 percent Donald Trump that made that responsible. One hundred percent. You're going to see changes because of this. He kept that promise. A promise I said, he's not going to do that. Nobody is going to do that. He did."

One chapter of ISIS has ended, but another may be starting

AHMAD AL-RUBAYE/AFP/Getty Images

For the most part, ISIS has fallen in Syria and Iraq. But before we celebrate the demise of this awful terrorist group, before we let our guard down, we should zoom out a bit, because ISIS is spreading. ISIS has largely just scattered out of the region as if someone turned on the kitchen lights and they scrambled.

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The Wall Street Journal spoke with Rohan Gunaratna, head of the International Center for Political Violence and Terrorism Research at the Nanyang University in Singapore. “Although Islamic State's ideology has suffered, it still has a huge potential," he told them. “Islamic State has entered a phase of global expansion, very much the same way al Qaeda extended globally in late 2001."

ISIS has spread into West Africa, and throughout much of Southeast Asia, and, as is typical of ISIS, they have done it violently, with a sick venom.

The world is their potential rubble, and their fight is endless.

Again, from the Wall Street Journal: “One chapter of ISIS has finished and another is beginning," said Hassan Hassan, a specialist on Islamic State at the Tahrir Institute for Middle East Policy in Washington. “Their resurgence is coming sooner than expected."

The world is their potential rubble, and their fight is endless.

'The Handmaid's Tale' got it right, just with the wrong religion

Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

Just in case The Handmaid's Tale's heavy-handed message wasn't already heavy-handed enough, a recent episode made it clear there's always room for further hysteria. Particularly, in relation to depictions of a “patriarchal society" run by Christian doctrine and determined by men — oh those dastardly men.

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The show appropriates Margaret Atwood of the same name, depicting a totalitarian society led by Christian doctrine in which women's bodies are controlled, and they have no rights. The story sounds familiar, but not in the same way Atwood and the show's creators have so smugly assumed.

Just as tone-deaf as 4th wave feminism itself, and tone-deaf in all the exact same places. Most notably, the show's heavy-handed indignation toward Christianity. Toward the patriarchy. Toward conservatives and traditional values. And just like 4th wave feminism, the show completely overlooks the irony at play. Because there is a part of the world where women and children are being raped and mutilated. In fact, in this very real place, the women or girls are often imprisoned, even executed, for being raped, and they are mutilated in unspeakable ways.

Theirs is a cruel, bloody, colorless life.

There is a place, a very real place, where women are forced to cover their entire bodies with giant tarp-like blankets, which is all the more brutal given the endless heat of this place. There is a place where women literally have one-third of the rights of men, a place where women are legally, socially and culturally worth less than men.

They cannot drive cars. They cannot be outside alone. They cannot divorce, they cannot even choose who they marry and often, they are forcibly married at a young age.

They are raped. A lot. Theirs is a cruel, bloody, colorless life. This is the life of tens, perhaps hundreds of millions of women. And, I'll tell you, their religion isn't Christianity.

Science did it again. It only took 270 million years, but this week, scientists finally solved the mystery that has kept the world up at night. We finally know where octopuses come from: outer space. That explains why they look like the aliens in just about every alien movie ever made.

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It turns out octopuses were aliens that evolved on another planet. Scientists haven't determined which one yet, but they've definitely narrowed it down to one of the planets in one of the galaxies. Hundreds of millions of years ago (give or take a hundred), these evolved octopus aliens arrived on Earth in the form of cryopreserved eggs. Now, this part is just speculation, but it's possible their alien planet was on the verge of destruction, so Mom and Dad Octopus self-sacrificially placed Junior in one of these cryopreserved eggs and blasted him off the planet to save their kind.

This alien-octopus research, co-authored by a group of 33 scientists, was published in the Progress in Biophysics and Molecular Biology journal. I'm sure you keep that on your nightstand like I do.

Anyway, these scientists say octopuses evolved very rapidly over 270 million years. Which sounds slow, but in evolutionary terms, 270 million years is like light speed. And the only explanation for their breakneck evolution is that they're aliens. The report says, “The genome of the Octopus shows a staggering level of complexity with 33,000 protein-coding genes — more than is present in Homo sapiens."

Lucky for us, they landed in the water. Otherwise, we might be octopus pets.

They mention that the octopus' large brain, sophisticated nervous system, camera-like eyes, flexible bodies and ability to change color and shape all point to its alien nature. Octopuses developed those capabilities rather suddenly in evolution, whereas we're still trying to figure out the TV remote.

These biological enhancements are so far ahead of regular evolution that the octopuses must have either time-traveled from the future, or “more realistically" according to scientists, crash-landed on earth in those cryopreserved egg thingies. The report says the eggs arrived here in “icy bolides." I had to look up what a “bolide" is, and turns out it's a fancy word for a meteor.

So, to recap: a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, an alien race of octopuses packed their sperm-bank samples in some meteors and shot them toward Earth. Lucky for us, they landed in the water. Otherwise, we might be octopus pets.