When plastic straws attack

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The number one threat to America, and the world right now, are plastic straws. Everybody knows this.

The plastic straws are catastrophic. Especially the extendable, bendy straws. They're the worst because they're fun and they make people want to use a straw, even if it's not technically necessary to use one.

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You use a plastic straw one time, then throw it away. And every single discarded straw in America ends up in the ocean. It's part of the Republican Party platform to ensure all the straws are dumped directly into the ocean, along with plastic bags and those plastic six-pack ring thingies, because Republicans hate nature. Everybody knows this.

So, the plastic straws end up forming giant straw masses the size of icebergs that float around the ocean, menacing small islands, boating enthusiasts, and even nuclear submarines. Don't ask me how, but trust me, they do. These plastic straw icebergs are large enough to be seen from space. Astronauts have been known to mistake floating straw icebergs for Hawaii.

And don't forget the aquatic life that is going extinct because of plastic straws. It's strawmageddon out there. Dolphins are being decimated by the straws clogging their blowholes. Octopuses can't squirt ink because their orifices are all blocked by straws. Discovery Channel is even canceling Shark Week because the sharks all have tummy aches, from you guessed it, eating plastic straws. Because there are no more fish to eat. Because they're all dying. From straws. Everybody knows this.

And don't forget the aquatic life that is going extinct because of plastic straws. It's strawmageddon out there.

Since Americans use 500 million plastic straws per day, and Republicans probably use more than that, it's clear that we're all about to die. Five hundred million straws per day is a big number, and virtually every major media outlet has cited that stat as fact. But then, NPR, of all sources, did some digging.

And it turns out that 500 million figure came from a young environmentalist named Milo Cress in a report he wrote seven years ago… when he was in the fourth grade. He couldn't find any stats on how many straws are used each day in the U.S., so he called straw manufacturers around the country and came up with his 500 million estimate based on the numbers they gave him.

Major companies like Starbucks routinely make multi-million-dollar decisions — like their decision to ban plastic straws — based on research data from fourth graders. Everybody knows this.

There's been a lot of talk about the idea of a (peaceful) "national divorce" as the Left continues to abandon everything that made America what it is. Well, this week's guest on "The Glenn Beck Podcast" is all for that divorce. Michael Malice is the author of "The Anarchist Handbook" and host of the podcast "Your Welcome." He joined Glenn to talk about how an anarchist would peacefully take on America's greatest challenges — with a smile.

"My rights are not up for discussion," Malice told Glenn. He explained why his version of America will save America, and why, in spite of anxious talk of "national divorce," he has so much hope for the future.

Watch the video clip below or find the full episode of "The Glenn Beck Podcast" here:


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There are new curriculum standards being implemented into schools throughout the nation for health classes that not only go far beyond what's appropriate for young children, but are entrenched in clear political biases, too. Under the standards, third-graders are taught about hormone blockers and endless gender identities, and topics get shockingly graphic for kids as young as 11. Some schools are even teaching their teachers and kids to ignore what parents have to say about these topics. And the worst part may be that many parents are completely unaware what their children are being taught.

Tina Descovich, co-founder of Moms for Liberty, joined "The Glenn Beck Program" to explain exactly what you can ask at your next school board meeting to ensure this "horrifying" curriculum isn't being taught in your kid's school.

Watch the video clip below:

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It should come as no surprise that a newsworthy story receives more media coverage when released on a Monday than a Friday. The reason is in part due to a large number of news-consuming Americans checking out for the week to focus on their weekend plans rather than the news.

On Monday's radio program, Glenn Beck shared information that President Joe Biden decided to release on Friday — when fewer people would notice — regarding the Climate Finance report. This report is marketed to Americans as "A Roadmap To Build a Climate-Resilient Economy." But Glenn believes the report to be Biden's Great Reset warning shot to banks.

In this clip, Glenn warned that if Americans don't stand together, in eight years we all indeed will own nothing. Watch the clip for the full story. Can't watch? Download the podcast here.



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On today's radio program, Glenn Beck was joined by Bill O'Reilly to discuss the top stories of the week.

For O'Reilly, the biggest story this week centered around someone mysteriously missing from mainstream media news reports today: Mark Zuckerberg. Specifically, O'Reilly said it's the 'scandalous' way the Facebook CEO spent nearly $420 million to influence the 2020 election — and did so successfully.

Watch the clip to hear the full conversation. Can't watch? Download the podcast here.

Want more from Glenn Beck?

To enjoy more of Glenn's masterful storytelling, thought-provoking analysis and uncanny ability to make sense of the chaos, subscribe to BlazeTV — the largest multi-platform network of voices who love America, defend the Constitution and live the American dream.