RADIOMay 19, 2025

Ben & Jerry’s Ben Busted Protesting RFK Jr.

“Ben & Jerry’s” co-founder Ben Cohen was recently arrested while protesting Health & Human Services Secretary RFK Jr. during a congressional hearing. Oh the irony that the ice cream man is heckling the guy who’s trying to make America healthy! But even more ironic is he’s heckling someone who probably AGREES with him on many things! Glenn and Stu discuss why leftists have turned on fellow liberals like RFJ Jr. who have joined the Trump administration and whether conservatives should also keep an eye out.

Transcript

Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: So Ben Cohen. Do you know who Ben Cohen is from Ben & Jerry's?

STU: Oh, yeah.

GLENN: Okay. He was removed yesterday from the hearing with Robert F. Kennedy about 15 minutes into the hearing.

You have it? Go ahead. Go ahead. There's that. The -- love that he's the face of ice cream. There he is.

VOICE: Members of the audience.

GLENN: And he is eventually removed. There he is. He's saying, Congress! Congress pays for bombs! Congress pays for bombs! They kill people.

VOICE: Members of the audience! Reminded, disruptions will not be permitted while the committee conducts its business. County police are asked to remove the individuals from the hearing room.

GLENN: That's -- I mean, let me have some ice cream right now. Let me get some of that. You know --

STU: So bizarre.

GLENN: So bizarre.

STU: And he's protesting RFK Jr. Who would be completely aligned with him, I think on this issue.

GLENN: Yes. On that issue. On a lot of issues. You know what, they just took some things out, because RFK is forcing them to take it out of their ice cream.

Ben & Jerry's stuff in their ice cream, that's not healthy for you according to RFK. That's -- I mean, that's amazing.

STU: Ice cream, typically not seen as a healthy food.

GLENN: No. No. No.

STU: Generally speaking.

GLENN: But their rocky road Rockefeller. With just a little bit of petroleum in it. Might have been a little bit too much. Might have been too much.

STU: You know, then you can choose not to eat it.

That's a wonderful thing you can do.

It's just strange the alignments here.

GLENN: I know.

STU: Did I -- this may be a fever dream, honestly, at this point.

I'm out on a limb with this.

But did Ben and Jerry go on with Tucker recently?

Is this a thing that occurred? People are saying yes. It's amazing the conversations that are happening on there right now.

I mean, like, look, it's good that you should be able to talk to people.

I'm sure Tucker does not agree with most of what Ben believes of Ben & Jerry's.

GLENN: Was Ben and Jerry on?

STU: I think it was only Ben.

GLENN: That's like having the cat from Tom and Jerry.

I don't know which one was the cat. Which one was the mouse?

STU: I think Tom was the cat, and Jerry was the mouse. So you want to have both the cat and mouse at the same time?

GLENN: Yeah, they're a team really.

STU: We'll get with their movie department.

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STU: Go to GlennBeck.com. Get the free email news letter. All the stories we talk about on a daily basis. GlennBeck.com.
(OUT AT 10:29 AM)

GLENN: Right now, SCOTUS is listening to arguments on birthright citizenship. The focus really is on the judge's power to block policies nationwide. That's got to stop. That just has to stop. But we'll see what the Supreme Court has to say.

STU: That's really the focus too. It's really not about birthright citizenship. From what I'm understanding. It's more about injunctions.

GLENN: Yeah. And it will be very narrow, on the injunctions, I think.

STU: Really?

GLENN: Yeah. So we'll see. We'll see.

So welcome to the program. We're glad you're here. You know who is not here? Is Ben and Jerry.

STU: He's here in my heart. By that way, I mean the calcium buildup from all the heart disease I've seen from the company, over the years. Yeah. He's not here.

He was at that big hearing.

It's difficult to understand where anyone is anymore.

I feel like, this was easier back in the day.

Like, you can kind of -- heard Ben and Jerry, you knew, left. It was easy, right?

GLENN: Right. Right.

STU: Now --

GLENN: I miss the days when we could just put labels on people. It was easy.

STU: It was easy. It made things a little easier to keep track of.

You know, like some people would label anti-Semite, for example, on Ben and Jerry.

Over the years. That was a label that I thought was interesting.

You know, but it's -- he's now opposing RFK who, I mean --

GLENN: I think it's probably on Ben & Jerry's side on many things.

STU: On almost everything.

Right? There is some things RFK has obviously changed now, when it comes to the woke stuff.

Some of the censorship stuff.

Although, I think -- it could be wrong on this.

Ben might be one of those old school socialist types. That might even agree with us on some of the censorship stuff.

Maybe. Because part of the socialist movement in the United States, was kind of built on --

GLENN: Was.

STU: Right. Was built on the operation to the McCarthyism.

And so there was -- there's some ideological.

GLENN: Right. They were for that, when they were the ones being shut up.

Now that they're not the ones being told to shut up.

They are like, we have every right to tell you to shut up. Okay.

STU: Yeah. Let me ask you this though. Because he's also been embraced by some parts of the right.

And -- and, you know, like Tucker did an interview with him. That's not an embrace. You can talk to whoever you want to talk to. Right? There's nothing wrong with that. We've talked to people on the far, far left. Even much farther left, crazier than even Ben or Jerry over the years. I -- no problem with that.

As a journalist, you should do that. You know, Tucker talked to Vladimir Putin, right? So did Megan Kelly.

GLENN: Yeah, I would talk to America's biggest enemies.

STU: Yeah. How else do you know what held them up? You would ask tough questions. I'm sure Tucker did in the interview. But we are -- I've noticed this thing that we're doing.

And I'm a little concerned. Let me see if I can articulate this.

GLENN: Are you?

STU: Us on the right, the conservative side of the spectrum, find someone who has some crossover with us.

In some way. But is really a figure of the left. Okay?

And we kind of give -- saying, hey, come on over. We have got this thing. It's wonderful!

And then they sort of become part of the movement, and that's totally fine. Like, let me give you an example. Tulsi Gabbard.

I really like Tulsi Gabbard.

She's been on the show a bunch of times. She's in the administration right now. She's great. so this is not a criticism.

I'm glad Tulsi Gabbard has had this awakening over the years. I'm excited about that. But so she comes over. She's -- you know, she supported Bernie Sanders. Ran the Sander's campaign in Hawaii back in the day. Not that long ago.

But she's had a transition. She's come over, and obviously, in the Trump administration right now.

And so we look at that. And we say, hey. That's great. We brought someone from the left, over to our side.

And that's great, if that's what you're doing. If you're convincing someone on the left, to convert their ideas into something closer to your ideas.

That's a positive change. You're widening the tent in a way that we can all support.

But really, what Tulsi is doing, in the government right now, is she's being consistent with her old left-wing views on things like, you know, stopping wars and not -- you know, and being tough on intelligence issues in the government.

GLENN: Yeah. Because we woke up on that.

STU: Well, because we've changed.

GLENN: Right.

STU: And that's what I'm getting to here. What seems to be happening, is we're embracing things on the left. And it's not us changing their views into ours. It's us changing our views into theirs. And then embracing some of those people.

That's not necessarily bad if we were wrong the whole time. Right?

GLENN: Yeah, I don't think we were on the endless wars.

STU: Yeah. I mean, some of that I agree with. Right?

The phrasing of it, and maybe the -- the scope of it, maybe I'm not fully there. But generally speaking, I think, you know, we've definitely overstepped our bounds at times.

GLENN: A lot of times.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: Yeah.

STU: I don't think that's improper to say.

GLENN: Yeah.

STU: But, again, I look at the way that Trump handles it. And it's different than what Tulsi's vision of this is.

GLENN: Oh, no.

STU: Trump is tough on Iran.

GLENN: I think Trump is Ronald Reagan. I'll pound you into the sand. I will turn your sand into glass. Don't screw with us. But then he's like, we're buddies right now. So you don't want to be buddies? We'll be buddies.

STU: For example, this: His Syria move, I think, is fascinating. And I think -- I think the right move. I'm not 100 percent sure.

GLENN: Me too. I'm not 100 percent on anything.

STU: But like, I think it's worth taking a stab on this.

It's a new regime. The guy used to be literally in al-Qaeda. Okay?

GLENN: I know.

STU: However, maybe he's changed.

I think the chances of it are low. But why not pull that lottery ticket?

Because the downside is what we already had.

So give a shot. Give the guy a handshake. Say, hey, we will drop these sanctions. We're going to give you a chance to not turn yourself into the old regime.

GLENN: I think that's --

STU: I think that's the right approach.

GLENN: Nobody is ever turned by lectures.

STU: Yeah. Or like opponent's lectures in particular.

GLENN: Right. You turn people through love and understanding. And giving them the benefit of the doubt.

Until they prove you wrong.

STU: It's a great point.

And I think it ties back to my previous. The way we started this conversation.

Which is, a lot of people in our movement, are being won over to previous left-wing positions by new friends. And that is not bad, in and of itself.

But we've done it a lot lately.

And I'm concerned.

GLENN: So because I changed. Not because of Tulsi.

STU: No. But the movement has changed.

GLENN: The reason I liked Tulsi at first. Was I like the fact, that she was willing to stand up to her own machine. And say, no. You guys are wrong.

You guys are going down this fascistic route.

And I won't go there with you. You are changing all the rules.

You are not who you said you were.

That's why I originally liked her. Because she would take on her own people.

And that takes courage. So it shows you something about her character. Then when you get to know her, you realize, oh, we might disagree on taxes and everything else. But she loves the country. She loves and reveres the Constitution of the United States.

STU: Yep.

GLENN: If I could get you on the Bill of Rights, we don't have any differences too big to not be able to bridge.

STU: And, again, I don't think Tulsi is a problem.

GLENN: No. I don't.

STU: That's not what I'm saying.

But, you know, you have -- let's -- Tulsi is in DNI. You have RFK Jr. HHS. It's a big one. You know, you look at the way RFK approaches -- I mean, he -- I mean, he is awfully close to someone who -- like a Michael Bloomberg on public health issues.

This is something we -- now, he was kind of a Republican in New York at one point.

Obviously, it was something that I know we oppose. The audience loudly opposes, when he was trying to control what you eat. I think there's some differences.

I'm not saying there aren't any.

But, you know, going after food companies. And changing the way -- that's a change for -- if that's what the right is. That is a change for the right.

We were always in favor of people making their own choices. And having companies being able to produce the products within some guidelines.

GLENN: Yeah. As long as they're not killing people.

STU: Right. There are guidelines. There are guardrails, of course, to all of this.

But generally speaking, ours were wide. The left's were small. And now we've taken, the guy who was the voice of the left's view on those. RFK Jr. and put him in charge of the right's view of it.

Is that a good thing?

Maybe it's great. Maybe he's been completely right this whole time, and we should have been approaching things that way.

GLENN: I think if our society was not getting sicker and sicker and sicker. Then --

STU: There's reasons for all of this stuff.

GLENN: Right.

STU: But we should notice those things.

You know, he's a really -- I think big example of that. Because that is -- it's a massive change to the way that we've -- we've done these things.

Another one is trade. Peter Navarro ran as a Democrat over and over and over and over again.

On these trade whys.

Now, Donald Trump has been consists with these ideas since the day he was in the public eye.

GLENN: There's nobody who has been more outspoken on antitrade, up until recently, than me. And you.

You're still outspoken on it.

I think -- I think we have to give it a shot.

Because we're behind the eight ball here.

GLENN: Yeah. I don't like the policy.

I don't agree.

But again. It's separate from whether each individual one of these is right.

There's a lot of these.

And over time, I think, you can knowledge.

It will add up to a completely different formula.

It might be the right thing for us to do.

But we should notice each one of these changes, I think.

GLENN: And I think you're right on that.

But isn't this the same as -- I mean, you're not the same guy I met 30 years ago.

STU: Totally, we all change.

GLENN: We all change. And that's good. And we should notice when we change. Because we learn from. Wait. Why did I just change?

Did I change for the right reasons? Did something happen to me?

Is somebody around me, changing this? You do -- we do have to pay attention to the change.

But I think change is good.

STU: It can be.

You know --

GLENN: If it's -- if it's well thought out.

If it is still built on principles.

And evolving understanding. Not of truth.

But how to get to the truth. Like, I -- for instance, the foreign war thing.

I just know, right now. What we've been doing is not working. It's not going to make the world safer. Ever. Ever. Ever.

It's not.

STU: Sometimes, it has. Obviously, in previous wars. But, yes. I --

GLENN: The meddling of everybody.

STU: You can't control everybody.

GLENN: It just won't work.

And it's making things worse.

Now, pulling all the way back, and saying, you know what, we don't -- you know, we don't want to be involved in the rest of the world.

That doesn't sound good to me.

STU: Yeah. That's what Trump is doing.

GLENN: Right. But it might be the right thing.

I just know -- I know for sure, what we had been doing, doesn't work.

And I really believed in what we were doing.

Well, I believed in what I thought we were doing.

You know what I mean?

STU: For sure.

GLENN: And so we have to make changes. And changes in almost everything.

And as long as it's logical.

As long as you have really thought things out. As long as you're not just conforming.

You know, the really scary thing is when people begin to conform, for any other reason, other than logic.

I've reasoned this out. I've asked critical questions.

And I am sorry, I would love more information that might change me out of this position.

But this is where I find myself at.

And even if I'm uncomfortable, I have to stand here. Because this is my current understanding of what's best.

You know, and as long as you keep an open mind. And you're constantly seeking to have a better understanding, of deeper truths.

Then I think -- I think you're fine.

But, you know, one of the things we're going to face, especially with AI.

All of a sudden, we're going to conform.

Because Google would give you page after page after page after page of different information.

ChatGPT gives you one answer. And you just assume it's right.

They don't give you anything --

STU: That's got to be a fascinating development in our society.

GLENN: And it's already there.

STU: Oh, it totally is.

GLENN: You Googled, and you had to look at different things and everything else.

This is one answer. And I know it's right, because it came from AI. Very dangerous.

The Dark Truth Behind Queer Theory & Gender ‘Affirmation’ For Children | Liz Wheeler & Glenn Beck

In this explosive conversation, Glenn Beck and Liz Wheeler expose the disturbing roots of gender ideology and queer theory — and how these radical ideas are directly targeting children. From the shocking origins of queer theory, where pedophilia and child pornography were openly defended, to Planned Parenthood’s new role as one of the largest distributors of transgender hormone therapy, the truth is undeniable: this movement is not about freedom or equality, but about dismantling families, corrupting innocence, and profiting off of our children’s pain. What we are witnessing is nothing less than a satanic ideology dressed up as compassion — and it’s spreading like wildfire through schools, culture, and medicine. Parents, you need to hear this. The time to protect your children and fight back is NOW.

Watch the full episode HERE

Glenn's "secret" to conquering the JFK fitness test

President Trump recently signed an executive order to reinstate the Presidential Fitness Test and the media is in a frenzy. But Glenn and Stu look back at the history of these tests, including JFK’s version of the Test that seems IMPOSSIBLE for modern Americans. But Glenn has a secret reason for why he’s confident in his pull-up abilities…

Transcript

Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: What is the -- what is the new physical -- the president's physical fitness, you know, plan?

STU: Well, the thing that RFK Jr and Hegseth were rolling out the other day. I don't know if it was the full test or anything, but they were issuing a challenge to America, to be able to do 100 pushups and 50 pullups within five minutes.

GLENN: That's crazy.

STU: Thank you! That struck you as also crazy.

I don't think there's ever been a time in my life, that I could do that. Let alone now with shoulder problems. And much too much weight.

GLENN: All right. But that was before I needed this walker.

STU: I don't think there was a time in my 20s or my teens, that I could do that. But that -- in five minutes? Fifty pullups?
GLENN: Both of them in 5 minutes.
STU: Yeah, both of them. So it's not like 100 pushups in five minutes. It's both tasks within five minutes.

GLENN: No. No. That's not true.

STU: RFK Jr. is just doing it in jeans.

GLENN: Yeah, well, RFK, he's -- he's a weirdo. I mean, he is. Come on. When it comes to fitness, he's a weirdo.
STU: Yes.
GLENN: I mean, he's done this his whole life. He's like 800 years old. He can still do it.

STU: Yes. Depressive, I will say.

GLENN: I don't know. He's a sex machine.

STU: Oh. That's been a problem for him. Yes, that's been an issue in his life. Yes.

GLENN: Okay. All right. Go ahead.

STU: Separate from the president's physical fitness test.

GLENN: Right.

STU: But, I mean, they don't, they don't really think we're going to do that, right?
Like, I mean, how long would that take you to do?

STU: I think for me, it would take a good month. I think a month, I could probably get two pullups a day. That would get me around, a little over 50. So I could do that. Plus, the pushups. A solid month, I could get that done.

GLENN: You could do more than two a day. You could do more than two a day.

STU: You know, Glenn, I've got to say. I think -- I will throw a number out there. No science behind this, so just as a guestimate.

I would say 40 percent of the population can't do any pullups. Maybe 30 percent. Thirty percent of the population can do exactly zero pullups. Precisely zero, so an infinite amount of time would be a correct answer for a third of the population.

GLENN: I think you're -- I think you're being -- I think you're being a little too optimistic. I think it's closer to 40 or 50. I think it's closer to 40 or 50. Maybe 60 percent.

STU: Right! Pushups are one thing. I mean, I think almost anyone can do a pushup. One --

GLENN: You can do a pushup. Yes. Yes.

STU: Singular pushup. And if you can do one, you can wait long enough, to do a second one.
And at some point, the hundred gets done. That's not the case with pullups. Pullups, you can sit there and think about how much you want to do a pullup for a really long time. But that doesn't make a pullup happen. If you've got a certain amount of weight on you. You're not doing a pullup. It's not occurring.

GLENN: I have no idea, how many pullups I can do.

STU: I have an exact number of pullups, you can do.

GLENN: Do you? You think so?

STU: Yeah. Yeah. I have the exact number. I have to calculate -- AI has been running a report on me. It came up with zero.

GLENN: Right. Right. Really?
I can do. I mean, this is so pathetic. Listen to this. I bet I could do three. You know, you could do three.

STU: In a row? Proper form.

GLENN: What do you mean in a row?

STU: I mean, holding on to the bar, without letting go, you're doing three. There's no way. I don't think so.

GLENN: I think I could do. Well, with proper form, I don't know about that. I don't know about that.

STU: I'm not saying it has to look pretty. You have to get your chin up above the bar. It can't be one of those things, where you're a quarter of the way up there.

GLENN: So I can do one and rest for ten minutes. I could do another one.

I think I can do that.

STU: If you -- I'm not saying, you jump up, and you pull yourself up as you're pulling up. Full hang --

GLENN: See, you may not know this.

But you know what, I've done the DNA test. Have you ever done the DNA test that tells you all about your genes and everything else? Mine came back with something remarkable, and I have to share. You might feel bad, next.
(laughter)

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STU: Coming up next, Glenn attempts live pullups on the air. Stay tuned!
(OUT AT 8:29 AM)

GLENN: You know no idea what who you're dealing with. No. You don't have any idea who you're dealing with here.

I got my DNA test back like 10 years ago. And we all -- we all took it, because we were looking for things. And so we all took it. My DNA test came back, and everybody in the family, their test made total sense. Like, oh, yeah. That makes...

Then we read mine. We have to find -- I have to find. See if Tania has it still. We should have had it framed. I swear to you, they -- they mixed me up with somebody else.

Somebody else is like, wait a minute. I'm this pathetic? Mine came out and said, you have the muscular structure of a -- of a -- something like a -- an elite athlete. You have the abilities and agility and everything else of an elite athlete. And I'm like, there's not a chance. I don't have any of that!

I don't even know if I have muscles. I have to check once in a while, and go, do I have muscles still?

Doctor is like, I don't know. Can I? Ask just press against my hand on the leg. I don't know.

You know, I don't know how to do that exactly. So --

STU: You sure it said elite athlete and not elephant? I mean, if they misspelled it.

GLENN: It was.

I was having eye problems at the time.

STU: No!

GLENN: I mean, we read it. And I was like Tania, I believe that for Tania.

Maybe they switched me and Tania. Because Tania is really strong. She'll kick your butt.

She works out every day. All of that. Me? Never. Never.

And it kind of makes me wonder, when I get to the other side, and the Lord went, okay.

So what did you do with your life again?

Because I gave this incredible body, and you wasted it the whole time.

And I'm like, you should have been more clear, okay?

You should have been more clear. I -- maybe I could have played basketball. But I tried once. And it was embarrassing. It was embarrassing. It was like sixth grade. And I'll never live -- I don't even want to think about my time on a basketball court. Okay? So don't -- don't start with me. You should have made it a little clearer. When I first started to do stuff. And I think that's fair. I think that's a fair argument. In my defense. In my defense, Your Honor, God, you should have made it a little more clear.

STU: Yeah. I mean, if they really wanted us to do this, then the 11th Commandment is 50 pushups, and -- or, 50 pullups and 100 pushups, right?

Like, put it in a commandment if you really want us to do it. You have to be more specific, we're Americans.

GLENN: Okay. So let me give you the top of the list for the JFK Presidential Fitness Test. Okay? This is what you had to do in high school. In high school.

Thirty-four pullups. Bar dips: Fifty-two. What's -- because I believe I did that. A long time. And I don't recommend it.

STU: It's not a barhop.

GLENN: Oh, it's -- oh, bar dips. Okay. Okay. All right.

Bar dips: 52. Handstand pushups: Fifty. What are handstands?

STU: Oh, my God. Handstands.

GLENN: I can't even stand on my hands. Is that I'm doing a handstand and a push up? Because that's not happening. You're not human.

STU: Yeah. You're balancing yourself on your hands. Your feet are above your hands on the wall. Like a wall. And you're doing --

GLENN: Oh, so you're balancing yourself. That makes it a little easier. Still impossible.

But a little easier.

GLENN: Impossible. You could do precisely zero of those.

Aright. So you had to do 50 handstand pushups.

Or one arm -- 30 -- no, sir.

Twenty-six one-arm burpees in 30 seconds. Is that a one-armed push up?

STU: No. Well, you're bracing your yourself like you're about to begin a pushup in a burpee with only one arm, which that's not that difficult.

But then you're doing. Then you're like, you move your feet towards your hands. And then you jump up in the air basically. And then you do it repeatedly.

GLENN: No, no, no. That's ridiculous. No.

STU: There's a law of gravity. You're not supposed to violate it. If it was a recommendation of gravity, then maybe jumping would be appropriate. But it's not. Follow the law.

GLENN: In 48 seconds, you had to do a 3300-yard shuttle. Now, I've been to the airport. I think I've done a 3300-yard shuttle, but it depends on who is driving. You know.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: Rope climb. Try this. Rope climb. Twenty feet, hands only! Sit start.

STU: That's what I remember from the president's physical fitness test. And I remember looking at that rope, like, no chance I could get up that thing.

GLENN: I remember looking up at that thing. Humiliation. Humiliation is coming my way. I'll never kiss a girl, because that ain't happening. I'll get maybe 10 feet up. Maybe. Maybe.

STU: And you were right for 24 years from that time, approximately.

GLENN: Agility run, 17 seconds. Extension pressups, what? What?

I'm sorry. Why am I so tired reading this?

Extension pressups. What's an extension pressup, 8-inch? You had to do 100 of them.

STU: Let's see. Exercise. An exercise for low-back pain involving lying on your stomach and pressing your upper body up with your arms while keeping your hips relaxed and down on the mat.

GLENN: Oh, I could do that know. 8 inches.

STU: The last part of it, relaxing down on the mat.
GLENN: That's what my doctor says I should be doing. What?

STU: I can do relaxed and down on the mat. That part of it --

GLENN: Yeah. I could do that -- I'm the only guy. I took yoga for a while, like three weeks. My wife is like, yoga. You could do yoga. Let's just do yoga together.

I did. And the yoga instructor said to me. Because we were doing a plank.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: And she came and all I remember her waking me up. And saying, I think you're the only person I've ever -- ever taught that fell asleep in yoga. And I'm like, it's just so relaxing. Just let me sleep. Let me sleep.

STU: That's interesting, that you did yoga. Is there any footage of that? Any video that we could post? That would be good for --

GLENN: No. There's not. You had to do pegboard. Five trips of pegboard. And I think that's when you have the two pegs.

STU: Yes, it was a board.

GLENN: You have to take it out, and put it up, right?

STU: This is American Ninja Warrior. No way.

GLENN: There's no way. There's no way.

STU: This is amazing.

GLENN: Try this one: You had to do a 45-second handstand. I've never been able to do a handstand. Never!

STU: Never.

GLENN: And I'm an elite athlete. I'm an elite athlete. Try this one: A man carry, 5 miles.

STU: What? What do you mean a --

GLENN: Five-mile man carry.

STU: Is a man carry as obvious as it --

GLENN: I think it is.

STU: You're carrying --

GLENN: If I'm going to carry that man, you have to carry me that man for five miles.

I'm not sure, I can't carry any man for any miles. I mean, if I am -- if I am a firefighter, count on burning in the house. You're going to burn in the house. Because I can't carry you out. I can get in there and go, yeah, I will have to leave you.
I will have to leave you here. I can't help you, sorry.

It's also getting really hot in here. I have to go. You had to do a five-mile jog. An obstacle course.

You had to swim prone for a mile. You had to swim underwater for 50 yards, any strokes, two minutes. Deep waterfront, hang float, with arms. What? What is a deep water hang float with arms. Wait. Wait.

It's a deep waterfront hang float with arms and ankles tied for six minutes.

What kind of al-Qaeda PE class was this?

STU: Who has access to -- who has access -- like, you're in the middle of the country, you may not have a deep water body nearby. This is -- are you sure this is an actual test?

GLENN: This is the actual test. This is the actual -- what is a deep water front hang float with arms and ankles tied for six minutes? Can you look that up?

STU: A deep water hang float is an aquatic hang float done in the deep end of a pool with the aid of flotation device, such as a noodle or belt.

In this position, the flotation twice supports your upper body, while your legs and torso hang freely beneath you.

That can't be what it is.

GLENN: You can do that.

Deep-end of the pool.

STU: Can you bring a margarita?

GLENN: Man, this test is no big deal.

What! No way. No way!

Here's the last thing on the test.

A vertical tread in an 8-foot circle for two hours!

No way.

STU: Vertical tread in an 8-foot circle?

GLENN: So you're in the water and you're treading water in a circle for two hours. Two!

STU: This is not -- what?

This is not the test.

GLENN: It is. Now, I told you, this is the top of the test.

This is the top of the test.

So this is for the ones who could do all the other tests.

This was the top of the test. The bottom of the test is not that much better. Here's the entry, okay? Let's see. Pullups, 2/6/10. I don't know what that means. Pushups, 16, 24, 32. Bar dips, four, eight, and 12. Situps, 30, 45, and 60. Broad jump, 6-foot, 6, 6, 6. And 6, 9.

To jump 6 feet? I don't even know if --

STU: That one is possible, yes. Glenn, I know it sounds incredible. But, yes. That one is possible.

GLENN: Sounds incredible. You know, I think we should have the average person Olympics. I really do. I really do.

STU: Oh, I would watch that.

GLENN: I would watch that every time.

You see them coming. And you're like, hmm. That one -- three feet. I'm giving him 3 feet. 200-yard shuttle. Agility run. Rope climb, 18 feet, hands only. 880 yards in three minutes. A mile in seven minutes. Pegboard, six holes. A 50-yard swim. Forty -- 40, 50-yard swim in 36 seconds. Man carry, 880 yards. No, thank you! No, thank you!

Look at -- look at what we've gone down. That's the bottom of it. And I don't think most Americans could do that.

I couldn't. Well, I could. Because I'm an elite -- I have the body of an elite athlete.

STU: No. You could not. Now, of course -- let's just say, this is supposed to be for a high school kid. Right?

So this is the prime of your athletic life. Could you do some of these things? Probably.
GLENN: Go into high school.
Go into any high school, and ask them to do this. There's no way. And all of the kids would be.

STU: Well, that's kind of what the reaction would be.

GLENN: Don't get me wrong. I would have been there too. And my parents would have said, suck it up. Just do it.

So nothing has really changed.

STU: That's been the reaction to this proposal too, of bringing this back. Right? The media is covering this. Like, it's going to embarrass children.

You know, I mean, I do remember it being like, I can't do that. I'm not going to the top of that rope. That's not happening.

That's sort of life. Right? Sometimes you can do things. Sometimes you can't do other things.

GLENN: That's why you have to learn how to injure yourself.

You know, how many stairs can I throw myself down, to not do serious damage, but enough to get me out of PE.

STU: Yeah, you have to fake an why are. You have to learn from LeBron James. Act like you got hit in the eye. And fall down like you were just stabbed over and over again, like you were in an athletic competition.

GLENN: There's no way. There's no way.

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