You have had a long day. Your feet are sore. Another double shift because Sharon didn't show up and the managers haven't hired a replacement. 14-hour shift. Non-stop. Every muscle aches. Your mind is racing and numb at the same time. You feel shattered. But, you sigh, it's Thursday. Oh, God, it's Thursday.
You remember that you agreed to work Sharon's shifts because she has some class or something. So there you are. Alone in your living room, exhausted. Worked to the bone, and—more than anything in the world—you want to escape for a few moments. You turn on the TV but it just makes you feel worse. Every channel—doesn't matter if it's sports or news or even food—every channel is politics. Constantly. And the politics they're spouting isn't yours, so you feel a bit betrayed. "I know," you say, "I'll have some ice cream."
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On a whim, you blindly and impulsively grabbed a pint of Ben and Jerry's when you were at the store last night, but by the time you got home, and unloaded the car, and packed the groceries away, you were too tired to shove the spoon into the tiny cardboard cup of ice cream. So, oh thank God, you can have it now. So you get to the freezer and open the door and, what's this? Staring back at you are three angry faces, screaming, under the Ben & Jerry's logo. The women are holding a sign that says "RESIST" in all caps. The women are angry. Bitter, even, like they want you dead, and so you fall over backward and die, just like they want you to.
There we go Ben & Jerry's. Happy? You were supposed to make us ice cream and now you're murdering people. In all seriousness, Ben & Jerry's can do whatever it wants as a company—although, the Left has a tendency to pick and choose when they believe in that idea as well (cough cough wedding cake)—but we also, as the ice-cream eaters have the right to disagree.
Specifically, I'm talking about the Vermont ice cream maker's newest flavor, "PECAN RESIST," which is an ice cream flavor that somehow fights President Trump in the Leftist resistance of fascism and all that other crap they have imagined.
Specifically, Ben & Jerry's tweeted:
Today we launch Pecan Resist! This flavor supports groups creating a more just and equitable nation for us all, and who are fighting President Trump's regressive agenda.
The Pecan Resist is actually a reference to the Women's March, which, if you listen to the show and read the right news sources, you'll know has recently taken some heat for their statements in support of the Pittsburgh synagogue shooting, you know, since Linda Sarsour, with her connections to HAMAS and Palestinian Liberation and Louis Farrakhan, is the one in charge.
The company released a statement:
We're comfortable with the idea that the people and the causes we partner with may have a point of view different from our own on some issues. They can be controversial, just as we can. Linda may not agree with everything we've done. But the work that she has done to promote women's rights, as co-chair of the Women's March, is undeniably important and we are proud to join her in that effort.
So, what are we supposed to do after a day of hard work when all we want is a brief escape? Blue Bell. It may still kill you. But there will be no politics involved. Only listeria.
Morningstar via Investopedia