RADIOMarch 13, 2022

Adam Curry: The Great Reset & ESG will lead us INTO DEMISE

Former MTV VJ Adam Curry can give Glenn a run for his money when it comes to knowledge of The Great Reset. Now the co-host of ‘No Agenda,’ he joins Glenn on radio to discuss recent efforts in America to both stop (and push forward) ESG — a system, he says, will only lead America ‘into demise.’ Plus, for those new to the concept, Curry breaks down ESG, how it’s being used against Putin in Russia, and why it could target YOU in the near future too...

Transcript

Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: Adam curry, a guy who I used to think was the coolest guy on television. And MTV VJ for years. And then is the guy really responsible for podcasting? I mean, he worked with Steve Jobs, to get podcasts on to the Apple i Pod at the very beginning. He is wicked, wicked smart.

Has been following things like ESG, and The Great Reset for a while.

We come Mr. Adam Curry. How are you?

ADAM: Hey, Glenn, good to see you. Ideas.

GLENN: Good to see you. We didn't meet until a couple weeks ago, and I can't believe that friends -- so we have to have mutual friends. Haven't put us together earlier.

Because we think so much alike.

ADAM: And I think as I've told you on your podcast. We think alike. We have the similar paths. We're also, I think more or less the same age.

After this wonderful visit I had with you, I want to be like you so much, I bought one of those microphones that you have. It sounded really good, on Glenn's Show. I need a little beard.

GLENN: Yeah. Just a little goatee.

You look a little like Colonel Sanders, and you're all set. I want to read something to you, Adam. And get your thoughts on it. We're working with 20 states on legislation. Anti-ESG legislation. And having the Treasuries divest themselves on places like BlackRock. That are clearly working on the interests of the everyday people.

So this is a statement from the Idaho association of commerce and industry. And I want to read this to you, and get your thoughts.

Some in the Idaho legislature are supposed to consider legislation to deal with ESG or environment, social, and governance. ESG, a risk management system is being labeled as the latest threat to individual rights.

Well, as preposterous as this sounds, folks like Glenn Beck have given legislators, a farcical conspiracy theory, from which legislation is being crafted.

While it's easy to dismiss, due to its lack of basis in reality. The problem it creates for businesses are real. Risk management for all companies.

Small and large. Private or publicly traded, have common threads in determining asset risks, from environment factors from climate change or local weather patterns.

Additional risks are present in employment and management relationships, and community acceptance of the business.

Finally, the governance of all companies are critical considerations, when it comes to risk management for investors.

Business is, by definition, based on a risk/reward system.

Legislative efforts to manage how risk inputs are evaluated are unwelcome. And foundationally dangerous to free enterprise. These people are actually using that.

The -- the Idaho association of commerce and industry, believes and defends, that if Idaho wants to retain the moniker of the least regulated state in the nation, there is no role for government to dictate how business or business their and investors will evaluate the importance, to each company. Whether it is through formal systems, labeled as ESG or otherwise.

Listen to this. The tragic reality of the new world is one where talking heads drive policy, to stir the masses by creating nonexistent problems. And then solving the problem with massive overreaches into the private sector.

Businesses cannot stand by and allow this to happen. And we will firmly defend our member's ability to run their own companies, in the way that best suits them as a private and independent entity.

ADAM: Well, first of all, congratulations, you're now officially a conspiracy theorist. This is good news. This is good news.

This is why I always call myself the crackpot. I figure that's much easier. They don't have to kill me.

Well, unfortunately -- and so much happened in such a fast amount of time, since we last saw each other. And a lot of it is coming much closer.

I think we're seeing the total capture. The capture is more or less complete. With that, I mean, if we go back, and talk specifically about what ESG is. It's great hearing about it. A lot of people are talking about it. Not sure exactly what it means. Again, it sounds for environmental social governance. And this is a -- there is a measuring standard that goes along with this. Which was created, literally by the bankers, including BlackRock. And with the separate foundation, to determine how environmentally conscious, socially conscious, and governance conscious a corporation is, and we're talking about mainly publicly listed companies.

GLENN: And hang on just a second. To give you an idea, there's no individual choice on anything. I've talked to people in the oil industry this week. And they have said, Glenn, we can't -- the leases and everything. Yeah. We need that.

We can't get a dime from the banks.

ADAM: Can't get money.

GLENN: So that's ESG. The banks are saying, no, those oil rigs --

ADAM: Not just the banks. It's much worse than that. It's the retirement funds. Pension funds. Insurance companies.

ADAM: Yeah.

And they have, for their own clients, they have certain things they can and cannot invest in.

And this ESG has become this fictitious score. And I don't have a Merrill Lynch retirement account. But I understand that people who do, are already seeing the ESG score of their portfolio, of the companies that they have in their portfolio.

GLENN: Right.

ADAM: And, you know, so we've seen a lot of this taking place, over the past, probably five years. When it started to accelerate. Environmental, that's all green new deal. And holy crap, we missed. We totally weren't paying attentional. And they passed a trillion and a half dollars, in which half is going into that kind of stuff. The social part.

GLENN: The latest bill that just passed. Yeah. The omnibus bill.

ADAM: These things are horrible. And that's all -- I'm sure the Federal Reserve is very happy. Oh, yes. We got to push some money out. Yeah, that's not going to help inflation.

But the social part, we've been watching, really the acceleration, with Black Lives Matter. You saw every corporation. Giving away tens of millions of dollars. Donating tens of millions of dollars to Black Lives Matter, Inc. Which, by the way, has been completely dissolved. There's no one around. Who runs it.

GLENN: Can't find the money.

ADAM: Where is the money? There's a lot of groups looking for money. We were all there. The money went through you. Where did you go?

That's also -- then you have the governance part. Which is equity. So do we have the right amount of black and brown people in the organization?

Do we have the right amount of female to male, to transgender, to whatever.

It all has to be equitable, and equal. And equity is really the key term.

But the social governance capture, is -- comes close to the environmental, with the war.

The war, I'll just say it, in Ukraine. First of all, covid is yesterday's news.

We're still in that -- in that head space, where we're freaked out about stuff.

And during lockdowns, et cetera. The thing that everybody could kind of glom on to, which created this social cohesion. Oh, my goodness.

We could get out of this. Was masking social distancing. And eventually, proof of vaccination. And et cetera, et cetera.

We're still kind of reeling from covid. Things are stopping.

There's no news from it. Please, pay no attention to the Pfizer documents that came out.

And we have tremendous inflation. Uncertainty in the world. War is always scary. And what have we all glommed on to? Thanks to the corporations who led the way, the huge divestiture in starting with Russian oil. But then tech companies.

Everyone just -- I mean, I'm surprised I didn't wake up this morning, and go to Google Maps, and not be able to find Russia.

You know, they canceled -- and we're all jumping on board, and this is wrong. This is fundamentally, at a human level, wrong.

GLENN: And it's wrong also, because despite what people say, that this is free market. Individuals get to choose their own way.

That is not true. That is the exact opposite.

MICHAEL: Wall Street is pushing. They're saying, you can't be in Russian stocks, for Russian assets, or commodities. You've got to get out of it.

And because of this capture, that's taking place with the large corporations, who are advertising, and telling everyone how great it is. I mean, the things that are happening.

This morning, I got an email from universal audio. They make audio equipment I use.

Well, this so horrible, what's going on.

We cut off all Russian customers. They can't even access all IP addresses. It's like, why are you doing that?

Isn't creativity crossing boundaries? Isn't that for all people of the world? I'm a Hamm, as in Hamm radio operator. There's a database online called QRZ.com. You can find all the call signs in there, and you can look stuff up. These guys, they took out all the Russian call signs overnight.

This -- this is -- this is insanity.

It is -- it is psychological escape. And we're following straight into demise.

GLENN: You know, I --

ADAM: For what is happening.

GLENN: I said earlier today, if they can do this to Vladimir Putin, who just willy-nilly throws people out of windows, and gets away with it. Has billions of dollars. And a country with a ton of nukes. If they can do this to him, what the hell do you think they'll think about doing something to you? When you disagree. I mean --

ADAM: And it's the cancellation that is the scary part, Glenn. Because it's financial canceling. And they did it to Canadian truckers.

I mean, in the omnibus bill.

I think it was $100 billion the IRS is going to receive.

GLENN: Yes.

ADAM: You know who they're not going to go after? Goldman Sachs. They're not going to go after BlackRock. They'll go after, you know, small people. Middle class -

GLENN: And probably people who have a low ESG score. Probably parents who are standing up in their -- in their school board meetings, and saying, this is wrong. Those people are going to be targeted.

ADAM: Yes, and you were talking to Michael Malice earlier. Another fine Texas resident. And, you know, he's -- he's absolutely right. With the direction, we're headed, with this announcement, well, it's just another let's go study stuff. And let's come back in six months. But the cryptocurrency, executive order.

GLENN: Biggest story of the week. I think that's the biggest story of the week.

ADAM: Yeah. Because once the central bank, digital coin comes in. And you can find online, videos of the director of the bank of international settlements, talking about this.

GLENN: Janet Yellen.

ADAM: It's open. They're very open about it. That your money will have expiration.

If they give you money, you may not be able to use it after a certain period. Literally, your dollars can be earmarked. And this can be tracked all the way through your spending habit. And when it pops somewhere, where you want to -- I can imagine, in the environmental part. Sorry, you can't buy gas today. You've surpassed your credits.

I know this sounds like -- but China is doing this.

GLENN: Russia. Russia started doing it too. Russia is now doing it.

ADAM: Well, of course, it's a globalist movement. Ultimately, the idea is to get all people enslaved underneath what they're doing.

GLENN: Yeah.

ADAM: But the way I see it, it's a perfect 2-pronged strategy. Now, you can -- you can inflate oil prices. You can -- you can make energy very expensive through legislation, executive orders, et cetera.

I truly believe that the idea -- and this is what you're going to hear our administration saying. Don't worry, we'll put 500,000 charging stations in.

Don't worry, oil won't be a problem once they buy an electric vehicle. That's what they want everybody to do. It's obvious. And they will push us in that direction.

It will be unaffordable to commute to work.

A whole section of people will have no problem, working from home.

It's the physicals versus the virtuals. Even though, you and I, by definition, are kind of virtuals. The physicals still have to go to work. They have five, 6-dollar a gallon gas.

It's going to break that system. Go home. You can't work. We'll save you some digital dollars.

GLENN: Right.

ADAM: Now, it's not tomorrow. But it's coming.

GLENN: It's coming I think sooner -- maybe longer than we would expect. But sooner than we would hope. Adam, hang on just a second. Because I want to continue the conversation about the digital currency.

Because does Congress or the people have a say in any of this? Or is it all the fed? We'll get to that in a second.

More with Adam Curry. Joseph lives in Pennsylvania. He writes about Ruff Greens. How it's affected his dog and his life. He said, my beagle is 17 years old. Sleeping like $20 a day. This is like President Miles.

STU: And miles put him to shame. He's 23 hours easy.

GLENN: He's out.

He wasn't active. I was afraid he was going to die soon. I tried Ruff Greens. I'm amazed. He's wagging his tail again. And I know he's happier. His food and Ruff Greens are gone every day. He's eating well. And he's more happy. I'm amazed at Ruff Greens. I appreciate getting my buddy back again. Thanks.

Joseph, thanks for listening. Thank you for trying Ruff Greens for your dog. And I'm so glad your dog is seeing a difference. It's pretty amazing, the difference. I mean, they eat it, like it's crack. I would say, I don't know what is in it, but I do. Vitamins, minerals, probiotics, antioxidants. Everything your dog needs to be healthy.

But it's like crack to them. They love it, generally speaking. They love it. And they're more active.

They run to the bowl. Ruff Greens. RuffGreens.com/Beck. They'll give you the first bag for free, you'll pay for shipping. Make sure your dog likes it. If they do, order the next bag, when you're done with the first one. And just watch the difference in your dog. 833-Glenn-33. 833-Glenn-33. Call them today.

RuffGreens.com/Beck. Ten-second station ID.
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You know, in that executive order, that Biden put out this week, it says, we have six months to -- to decide and come up with a plan, and we'll consult everyone.

Well, it talked about all its stakeholders. Other countries. Businesses around the world. Labor unions.

But it didn't say anything about the American people, or Congress.

It -- do you know that process? Is it all through the Federal Reserve?

They get to choose?

ADAM: Well, we have to go back to the Constitution, who is really allowed, or has the power to create money. And that's certainly not a commercial bank. But that's the Federal Reserve Act changed that. That is something that we would have to go back to.

I think that what is good for people to understand.

And I came to my own understanding, when I talked to banker friends, or people in politics. Even you see it now. When they talk about raising the debt limits.

And there's -- you know, this always is a polarizing issue. Oh, my goodness.

Oh, the Republicans will shut down this. The Democrats will shut down the government. What is really going on. And they're always surprised. You can't not raise the debt limit. That's un-American. You literally hear people say that. That's un-American. Because the way our system works. The financial system is, and this is why the Federal Reserve, does create our money.

Through debt. Says, you know, we like to keep inflation at 2 percent a year. That's not 2 percent, what you're paying extra in gas. Or what you're paying for household goods. Or this Consumer Price Index they've made up or changed throughout the years. That's how much money they need to print every single year, to create, in order for the system to work. And that's why, a Toyota truck, in the '70, cost $5,000. Now it starts at $50,000. That is the result of money printing throughout the decades.

GLENN: And what's crazy. You saw this in realtime. Recently, they said in 2008, the price of gas was -- what was it? 341.

But today -- or what was the price of gas?

STU: It was 411.

GLENN: 411, yeah. And now today, in today's dollars, they say, due to inflation.

STU: That would be like 525.

GLENN: You're like, wait. That was 12 years ago. What are you talking about?

You know, it's not like 1950, to today.

ADAM: Well, and so now the gig is up. Because throughout the financial crisis of 2008, 2009, when they created a whole lot of money. Then we had a similar issue in the liquidity; i.e., banks weren't trusting each other to lend to each other.

So there are one or two weak sisters in the mix. Which is still in there. We don't know where. Now we have another trillion and a half dollars going in. They're solving these problems, kind of as we're going along.

The fix is the central bank digital currency. Because then, you don't have to create more money. You can destroy money, and you can destroy it, directly from people.

By taking off my new amounts of their bank account, after the decimal, and just forever.

GLENN: Adam curry. Great to talk to you. Hope to talk to you again soon. Thank you very much.

Adam curry. You can find his podcast. It's tremendous. Wherever you get your podcasts.

Exposing the dangerous roots of queer theory

In this explosive conversation, Glenn Beck and Liz Wheeler expose the disturbing roots of gender ideology and queer theory — and how these radical ideas are directly targeting children. From the shocking origins of queer theory, where pedophilia and child pornography were openly defended, to Planned Parenthood’s new role as one of the largest distributors of transgender hormone therapy, the truth is undeniable: this movement is not about freedom or equality, but about dismantling families, corrupting innocence, and profiting off of our children’s pain. What we are witnessing is nothing less than a satanic ideology dressed up as compassion — and it’s spreading like wildfire through schools, culture, and medicine. Parents, you need to hear this. The time to protect your children and fight back is NOW.

Watch the full episode HERE

Glenn's "secret" to conquering the JFK fitness test

President Trump recently signed an executive order to reinstate the Presidential Fitness Test and the media is in a frenzy. But Glenn and Stu look back at the history of these tests, including JFK’s version of the Test that seems IMPOSSIBLE for modern Americans. But Glenn has a secret reason for why he’s confident in his pull-up abilities…

Transcript

Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: What is the -- what is the new physical -- the president's physical fitness, you know, plan?

STU: Well, the thing that RFK Jr and Hegseth were rolling out the other day. I don't know if it was the full test or anything, but they were issuing a challenge to America, to be able to do 100 pushups and 50 pullups within five minutes.

GLENN: That's crazy.

STU: Thank you! That struck you as also crazy.

I don't think there's ever been a time in my life, that I could do that. Let alone now with shoulder problems. And much too much weight.

GLENN: All right. But that was before I needed this walker.

STU: I don't think there was a time in my 20s or my teens, that I could do that. But that -- in five minutes? Fifty pullups?
GLENN: Both of them in 5 minutes.
STU: Yeah, both of them. So it's not like 100 pushups in five minutes. It's both tasks within five minutes.

GLENN: No. No. That's not true.

STU: RFK Jr. is just doing it in jeans.

GLENN: Yeah, well, RFK, he's -- he's a weirdo. I mean, he is. Come on. When it comes to fitness, he's a weirdo.
STU: Yes.
GLENN: I mean, he's done this his whole life. He's like 800 years old. He can still do it.

STU: Yes. Depressive, I will say.

GLENN: I don't know. He's a sex machine.

STU: Oh. That's been a problem for him. Yes, that's been an issue in his life. Yes.

GLENN: Okay. All right. Go ahead.

STU: Separate from the president's physical fitness test.

GLENN: Right.

STU: But, I mean, they don't, they don't really think we're going to do that, right?
Like, I mean, how long would that take you to do?

STU: I think for me, it would take a good month. I think a month, I could probably get two pullups a day. That would get me around, a little over 50. So I could do that. Plus, the pushups. A solid month, I could get that done.

GLENN: You could do more than two a day. You could do more than two a day.

STU: You know, Glenn, I've got to say. I think -- I will throw a number out there. No science behind this, so just as a guestimate.

I would say 40 percent of the population can't do any pullups. Maybe 30 percent. Thirty percent of the population can do exactly zero pullups. Precisely zero, so an infinite amount of time would be a correct answer for a third of the population.

GLENN: I think you're -- I think you're being -- I think you're being a little too optimistic. I think it's closer to 40 or 50. I think it's closer to 40 or 50. Maybe 60 percent.

STU: Right! Pushups are one thing. I mean, I think almost anyone can do a pushup. One --

GLENN: You can do a pushup. Yes. Yes.

STU: Singular pushup. And if you can do one, you can wait long enough, to do a second one.
And at some point, the hundred gets done. That's not the case with pullups. Pullups, you can sit there and think about how much you want to do a pullup for a really long time. But that doesn't make a pullup happen. If you've got a certain amount of weight on you. You're not doing a pullup. It's not occurring.

GLENN: I have no idea, how many pullups I can do.

STU: I have an exact number of pullups, you can do.

GLENN: Do you? You think so?

STU: Yeah. Yeah. I have the exact number. I have to calculate -- AI has been running a report on me. It came up with zero.

GLENN: Right. Right. Really?
I can do. I mean, this is so pathetic. Listen to this. I bet I could do three. You know, you could do three.

STU: In a row? Proper form.

GLENN: What do you mean in a row?

STU: I mean, holding on to the bar, without letting go, you're doing three. There's no way. I don't think so.

GLENN: I think I could do. Well, with proper form, I don't know about that. I don't know about that.

STU: I'm not saying it has to look pretty. You have to get your chin up above the bar. It can't be one of those things, where you're a quarter of the way up there.

GLENN: So I can do one and rest for ten minutes. I could do another one.

I think I can do that.

STU: If you -- I'm not saying, you jump up, and you pull yourself up as you're pulling up. Full hang --

GLENN: See, you may not know this.

But you know what, I've done the DNA test. Have you ever done the DNA test that tells you all about your genes and everything else? Mine came back with something remarkable, and I have to share. You might feel bad, next.
(laughter)

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GLENN: Everybody talks about the American dream as an opportunity. Here's the truth, for a lot of families. That dream is being eaten alive by interest rates and endless payments.

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They're not a bank trying to push you into another product.

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Then they build a plan around you. And if that means refinancing to knock years off your loan, they'll show you exactly how to do it. If it means consolidating high interest cards, so you can -- you can stop bleeding every single month.

They will make that happen. Their mission is really simple. Help you take control of your life. To help save you. Help you finally see the light at the end of the tunnel, because the American dream, that opportunity to do great things, it doesn't need to be reinvented.

It just needs to be made possible again. And that could start with American Financing. So call them. American Financing. 800-906-2440. 800-906-2440. AmericanFinancing.net.

STU: Coming up next, Glenn attempts live pullups on the air. Stay tuned!
(OUT AT 8:29 AM)

GLENN: You know no idea what who you're dealing with. No. You don't have any idea who you're dealing with here.

I got my DNA test back like 10 years ago. And we all -- we all took it, because we were looking for things. And so we all took it. My DNA test came back, and everybody in the family, their test made total sense. Like, oh, yeah. That makes...

Then we read mine. We have to find -- I have to find. See if Tania has it still. We should have had it framed. I swear to you, they -- they mixed me up with somebody else.

Somebody else is like, wait a minute. I'm this pathetic? Mine came out and said, you have the muscular structure of a -- of a -- something like a -- an elite athlete. You have the abilities and agility and everything else of an elite athlete. And I'm like, there's not a chance. I don't have any of that!

I don't even know if I have muscles. I have to check once in a while, and go, do I have muscles still?

Doctor is like, I don't know. Can I? Ask just press against my hand on the leg. I don't know.

You know, I don't know how to do that exactly. So --

STU: You sure it said elite athlete and not elephant? I mean, if they misspelled it.

GLENN: It was.

I was having eye problems at the time.

STU: No!

GLENN: I mean, we read it. And I was like Tania, I believe that for Tania.

Maybe they switched me and Tania. Because Tania is really strong. She'll kick your butt.

She works out every day. All of that. Me? Never. Never.

And it kind of makes me wonder, when I get to the other side, and the Lord went, okay.

So what did you do with your life again?

Because I gave this incredible body, and you wasted it the whole time.

And I'm like, you should have been more clear, okay?

You should have been more clear. I -- maybe I could have played basketball. But I tried once. And it was embarrassing. It was embarrassing. It was like sixth grade. And I'll never live -- I don't even want to think about my time on a basketball court. Okay? So don't -- don't start with me. You should have made it a little clearer. When I first started to do stuff. And I think that's fair. I think that's a fair argument. In my defense. In my defense, Your Honor, God, you should have made it a little more clear.

STU: Yeah. I mean, if they really wanted us to do this, then the 11th Commandment is 50 pushups, and -- or, 50 pullups and 100 pushups, right?

Like, put it in a commandment if you really want us to do it. You have to be more specific, we're Americans.

GLENN: Okay. So let me give you the top of the list for the JFK Presidential Fitness Test. Okay? This is what you had to do in high school. In high school.

Thirty-four pullups. Bar dips: Fifty-two. What's -- because I believe I did that. A long time. And I don't recommend it.

STU: It's not a barhop.

GLENN: Oh, it's -- oh, bar dips. Okay. Okay. All right.

Bar dips: 52. Handstand pushups: Fifty. What are handstands?

STU: Oh, my God. Handstands.

GLENN: I can't even stand on my hands. Is that I'm doing a handstand and a push up? Because that's not happening. You're not human.

STU: Yeah. You're balancing yourself on your hands. Your feet are above your hands on the wall. Like a wall. And you're doing --

GLENN: Oh, so you're balancing yourself. That makes it a little easier. Still impossible.

But a little easier.

GLENN: Impossible. You could do precisely zero of those.

Aright. So you had to do 50 handstand pushups.

Or one arm -- 30 -- no, sir.

Twenty-six one-arm burpees in 30 seconds. Is that a one-armed push up?

STU: No. Well, you're bracing your yourself like you're about to begin a pushup in a burpee with only one arm, which that's not that difficult.

But then you're doing. Then you're like, you move your feet towards your hands. And then you jump up in the air basically. And then you do it repeatedly.

GLENN: No, no, no. That's ridiculous. No.

STU: There's a law of gravity. You're not supposed to violate it. If it was a recommendation of gravity, then maybe jumping would be appropriate. But it's not. Follow the law.

GLENN: In 48 seconds, you had to do a 3300-yard shuttle. Now, I've been to the airport. I think I've done a 3300-yard shuttle, but it depends on who is driving. You know.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: Rope climb. Try this. Rope climb. Twenty feet, hands only! Sit start.

STU: That's what I remember from the president's physical fitness test. And I remember looking at that rope, like, no chance I could get up that thing.

GLENN: I remember looking up at that thing. Humiliation. Humiliation is coming my way. I'll never kiss a girl, because that ain't happening. I'll get maybe 10 feet up. Maybe. Maybe.

STU: And you were right for 24 years from that time, approximately.

GLENN: Agility run, 17 seconds. Extension pressups, what? What?

I'm sorry. Why am I so tired reading this?

Extension pressups. What's an extension pressup, 8-inch? You had to do 100 of them.

STU: Let's see. Exercise. An exercise for low-back pain involving lying on your stomach and pressing your upper body up with your arms while keeping your hips relaxed and down on the mat.

GLENN: Oh, I could do that know. 8 inches.

STU: The last part of it, relaxing down on the mat.
GLENN: That's what my doctor says I should be doing. What?

STU: I can do relaxed and down on the mat. That part of it --

GLENN: Yeah. I could do that -- I'm the only guy. I took yoga for a while, like three weeks. My wife is like, yoga. You could do yoga. Let's just do yoga together.

I did. And the yoga instructor said to me. Because we were doing a plank.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: And she came and all I remember her waking me up. And saying, I think you're the only person I've ever -- ever taught that fell asleep in yoga. And I'm like, it's just so relaxing. Just let me sleep. Let me sleep.

STU: That's interesting, that you did yoga. Is there any footage of that? Any video that we could post? That would be good for --

GLENN: No. There's not. You had to do pegboard. Five trips of pegboard. And I think that's when you have the two pegs.

STU: Yes, it was a board.

GLENN: You have to take it out, and put it up, right?

STU: This is American Ninja Warrior. No way.

GLENN: There's no way. There's no way.

STU: This is amazing.

GLENN: Try this one: You had to do a 45-second handstand. I've never been able to do a handstand. Never!

STU: Never.

GLENN: And I'm an elite athlete. I'm an elite athlete. Try this one: A man carry, 5 miles.

STU: What? What do you mean a --

GLENN: Five-mile man carry.

STU: Is a man carry as obvious as it --

GLENN: I think it is.

STU: You're carrying --

GLENN: If I'm going to carry that man, you have to carry me that man for five miles.

I'm not sure, I can't carry any man for any miles. I mean, if I am -- if I am a firefighter, count on burning in the house. You're going to burn in the house. Because I can't carry you out. I can get in there and go, yeah, I will have to leave you.
I will have to leave you here. I can't help you, sorry.

It's also getting really hot in here. I have to go. You had to do a five-mile jog. An obstacle course.

You had to swim prone for a mile. You had to swim underwater for 50 yards, any strokes, two minutes. Deep waterfront, hang float, with arms. What? What is a deep water hang float with arms. Wait. Wait.

It's a deep waterfront hang float with arms and ankles tied for six minutes.

What kind of al-Qaeda PE class was this?

STU: Who has access to -- who has access -- like, you're in the middle of the country, you may not have a deep water body nearby. This is -- are you sure this is an actual test?

GLENN: This is the actual test. This is the actual -- what is a deep water front hang float with arms and ankles tied for six minutes? Can you look that up?

STU: A deep water hang float is an aquatic hang float done in the deep end of a pool with the aid of flotation device, such as a noodle or belt.

In this position, the flotation twice supports your upper body, while your legs and torso hang freely beneath you.

That can't be what it is.

GLENN: You can do that.

Deep-end of the pool.

STU: Can you bring a margarita?

GLENN: Man, this test is no big deal.

What! No way. No way!

Here's the last thing on the test.

A vertical tread in an 8-foot circle for two hours!

No way.

STU: Vertical tread in an 8-foot circle?

GLENN: So you're in the water and you're treading water in a circle for two hours. Two!

STU: This is not -- what?

This is not the test.

GLENN: It is. Now, I told you, this is the top of the test.

This is the top of the test.

So this is for the ones who could do all the other tests.

This was the top of the test. The bottom of the test is not that much better. Here's the entry, okay? Let's see. Pullups, 2/6/10. I don't know what that means. Pushups, 16, 24, 32. Bar dips, four, eight, and 12. Situps, 30, 45, and 60. Broad jump, 6-foot, 6, 6, 6. And 6, 9.

To jump 6 feet? I don't even know if --

STU: That one is possible, yes. Glenn, I know it sounds incredible. But, yes. That one is possible.

GLENN: Sounds incredible. You know, I think we should have the average person Olympics. I really do. I really do.

STU: Oh, I would watch that.

GLENN: I would watch that every time.

You see them coming. And you're like, hmm. That one -- three feet. I'm giving him 3 feet. 200-yard shuttle. Agility run. Rope climb, 18 feet, hands only. 880 yards in three minutes. A mile in seven minutes. Pegboard, six holes. A 50-yard swim. Forty -- 40, 50-yard swim in 36 seconds. Man carry, 880 yards. No, thank you! No, thank you!

Look at -- look at what we've gone down. That's the bottom of it. And I don't think most Americans could do that.

I couldn't. Well, I could. Because I'm an elite -- I have the body of an elite athlete.

STU: No. You could not. Now, of course -- let's just say, this is supposed to be for a high school kid. Right?

So this is the prime of your athletic life. Could you do some of these things? Probably.
GLENN: Go into high school.
Go into any high school, and ask them to do this. There's no way. And all of the kids would be.

STU: Well, that's kind of what the reaction would be.

GLENN: Don't get me wrong. I would have been there too. And my parents would have said, suck it up. Just do it.

So nothing has really changed.

STU: That's been the reaction to this proposal too, of bringing this back. Right? The media is covering this. Like, it's going to embarrass children.

You know, I mean, I do remember it being like, I can't do that. I'm not going to the top of that rope. That's not happening.

That's sort of life. Right? Sometimes you can do things. Sometimes you can't do other things.

GLENN: That's why you have to learn how to injure yourself.

You know, how many stairs can I throw myself down, to not do serious damage, but enough to get me out of PE.

STU: Yeah, you have to fake an why are. You have to learn from LeBron James. Act like you got hit in the eye. And fall down like you were just stabbed over and over again, like you were in an athletic competition.

GLENN: There's no way. There's no way.

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