What's more cringeworthy: Listening to Sen. John Kennedy read the explicit "children's" books that the Left wants to put in school libraries or listening to Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion's just-as-explicit new single, "Bongos"? Glenn decided to put these two head-to-head and gives Cardi B's new song a dramatic reading remix that nobody asked for.
Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors
STU: Cardi B. She built her career on incredible lyrics and songwriting.
GLENN: No. I'm not going to.
STU: Along with Megan Thee Stallion.
GLENN: No. I'm not going to be roped into this. No.
STU: No, I believe you said I could pull the Cardi B ripcord at any point during this programming.
GLENN: Okay. Would you rather here -- stop, no, I'm not. You're cheapening this art.
Would you rather hear Senator Kennedy reading from a pornographic children's book?
STU: No. I've seen this video. Only in video form. Where they describe what happened. And I don't want to hear it.
GLENN: I think we should play a little bit of it. And go in with an open.
VOICE: Let's take two books. That have been much discussed. The first one is called All Boys Aren't Blue.
And I will quote from them.
STU: I don't know that we need to hear his --
VOICE: I put some lube on. And got him on his knees.
STU: I've had --
GLENN: You've had enough?
Then why do you want the Cardi B thing?
STU: That's a great question.
I really don't have an answer to that.
I really don't.
I don't know why.
Partially because I just that, I can't listen to Senator Kennedy doing that. Look, I respect what he's doing here.
It's important that he's doing this.
However, it makes me cringe for him.
And I will then -- when you're doing the Cardi B thing. I will cringe for you. I want bad things to happen.
GLENN: Ladies and gentlemen.
Cardi B. Megan Thee Stallion.
The lyrics from Bongos.
Bong, bong, bong, bong, we good? Bong, bong, bong, like a drum. Bong, bong, bong, bong, this is fire. Bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong. N-word. Eat this A like a plum. Plum. This P-word, tight like a nun. Nun. Better chew it up like it's Yum gum.
GLENN: You don't think that this is --
STU: Do you still have that Senator Kennedy video? Pull it up?
GLENN: We were talking about this earlier. Stop the music.
Because I -- we were talking about lyrics. There is nothing in any song today, that doesn't revolve things that go inside of you.
STU: That's really the only option of song writing.
GLENN: It is. Love songs. Nothing.
Nothing. And how does anyone listen to this and think this is good?
STU: Well, we don't even know what happened in the song. How would we question that?
GLENN: Well, that ain't your N-word?
He is both ours.
STU: Why are you saying N-word so much still?
GLENN: P-word? Tight like a nun.
Counting hundreds up with my thumb. Thumb.
I don't care where you're from. From.
Better beat this S like a drum.
Don't be talking S like you know me.
Woo. I ride D like a pony.
GLENN: Girl that N-word look like a brokey.
Real hot girl S.
Go and F with his homey. He's a -- a -- that's all I have.
Ladies and gentlemen, the lyrical stylings of Cardi B.
GLENN: And Megan Thee Stallion.
STU: Go, Megan.
GLENN: Megan. Megan. Megan Thee -- she is. Wow.
STU: That's -- that's...
GLENN: I don't think our culture has gone downhill. Not at all. Not at all.
STU: It's well written. You may not like the music, but you can tell -- that is a lyrical masterpiece.
GLENN: At this point, I am rooting for AI to take over.
Rebecca writes in about --
STU: AI legitimately would not allow you to come up with those lyrics. Because they would say, there's all sorts of racial slurs.
At the very least, they would stop you at that.
GLENN: Oh, now you've challenged me.
STU: You think you can get --
GLENN: I think I could get --
STU: No way.
GLENN: I just I'm -- hmm.
STU: No way.
STU: You cannot get AI to -- up to produce.
STU: Something like that. With those words in it.
Those are naughty words.
GLENN: I believe I've been challenged.