RADIOSeptember 02, 2024

EXPLAINED: What happens if Trump wins from PRISON?

Special counsel Jack Smith has revived his classified documents case against Donald Trump. But why is he doing this so close to the election? Will the Supreme Court's immunity ruling apply here? And what would happen if Trump wins the election from prison? Former U.S. DoJ Assistant Attorney General and Center for Renewing America senior fellow Jeff Clark joins Glenn to break it all down: “I would not be surprised if [this judge] sentenced President Trump to prison.” But he also explains why he believes the American people will see through the Left’s attempt to “criminalize politics” and realize that we have become a banana republic.

Transcript

Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: Jeff Clark, he is a senior fellow at the center for renewing America. And he knows this case, quite well.

The case against Trump. The latest indictment filed against special counsel Jack Smith.

Jeff, I have been trying to understand this story.

It's very complex. Can you just break it down for dummies, like me?

JEFF: Glenn, thanks for having me.

And, you know, you're definitely underestimating yourself, Glenn, but hopefully I can help the audience to understand the case.

GLENN: Okay.

JEFF: So, look, obviously this case was filed a way back.

And it's resulted in several important decisions, first as the district court, and then in the DC circuit, holding that President Trump was not immune.

You know, they tried to last that argument out of the lower courts, especially with this ridiculous SEAL team six hypothetical.

The idea that President Trump could order Seal Team Six to assassinate his political rivals.

And so the argument goes. You know, because that would not make any sense.

Therefore, he can't have any form of immunity. And I always thought that hypothetical was totally ridiculous, when the case eventually reached the Supreme Court. In a case called Trump v. United States, which was decided by the Supreme Court. Six to three, most of it, on July 1st of this year.

GLENN: Right.

JEFF: They gave that argument, short trip too. And they held, consistent with the fact, that every branch of government, has some form of immunity. That the president of the United States, and the one that was just applied to Donald Trump, it was applied to all presidents of the United States. Have to have, you know, a set of immunities. And the immunities they decided that he had, were basically a -- in a trichotomy.

So the first tier is that the president exercises his core executive powers.

You know, the things that are at the heart of being president. He is absolutely immune from those.

Full stop. Then second, per anything else that he does. Which is not within his core powers.

So that would include things like speaking, using the president's bully pulpit.

He's immune to the outer boundaries of his office. As long as it has the nexus to his official duties, which a lot of things do. And that there he has presumptive immunity. And in order to overcome it, you have to show that it would really make no impingement or inroads into the executive power. You know, to -- to be able to pierce that immunity. So that's also a very strong form of immunity.

GLENN: But that would be something like he's saying, you know, WWE is real. And somebody sues him. And says, it's not real.

It has nothing to do with the presidency. Right?

JEFF: Exactly right. So it certainly -- to my mind, let's take the speech, that he gave, you know, outside the -- the White House. On January 6th. He was clearly talking about matters of public concern, which the president can express himself on. And I think that that is presumptively immune. And I think to tell a president that he could not set out his views about an election, would be an inroads into the presidency. And therefore, he would also be immune for that.

GLENN: Yeah.

JEFF: So the left category, and the trichotomy is a category for which a president would not be immune, Glenn. That's the category of -- of an unofficial act. An act in a private capacity.

And so, after the Supreme Court's decision on July 1st, you know, it -- it kind of goes down each step. It steps down to the Court of Appeals level.

And they remand it back to the district court to Judge Chutkan.

And then Judge Chutkan started to set proceedings. More -- more on that in a minute.

And then what's ultimately come, once she now has jurisdiction back in the case, is that Jack Smith was off to the side, working with an entirely different grand jury, and he got this superseding indictment that came out yesterday.

And in -- in a phrase, what that indictment is, you know, new indictment. Meet the old indictment. You know, it's just the same as that old indictment.

He's just reformulated to try to make it consistent with and fit everything into the third box.

The box of everything President Trump did. That he had indicted before.

The first time. Is actually -- as opposed to a set of official acts.

And therefore, Jack Smith argues, he's not immune.

GLENN: So are they doing this, to smear him yet again. So late in the campaign.

Or is this a plan just in case he wins, they think this will keep him out of office?

JEFF: I think, Glenn, that they're doing it for all of those reasons. Right? Because they absolutely want to block him any way they can.
So this is election interference. There's no way you should be issuing a new indictment like this, using a new grand jury.

This close to a major presidential election. Especially --

GLENN: Correct.

JEFF: And it also shows me that this was being concealed. So what happens is that the court was told.

Because it was ready to go. Trying to set deadlines to try to march back toward a trial.

And Jack Smith made a filing. The last couple of weeks. Saying, no. No. No. Hold on. I need more time.

We're doing consultations inside the Justice Department.

Well, I'm sure they were doing consultations inside the Justice Department. But that's not the real reason. It's now clear, that the real reason is that he was actually in secret grand jury proceedings, getting this superseding indictment.

GLENN: Jeez.

JEFF: And the media, right? The media has been all over, watching the DC courthouse.

I mean, back in the real height of this, a year ago, you know, no one could walk into the courthouse, even if it was for an entirely different reason.

And not have the media report X, Y, Z. You know, this person went in. They must be going to the grand jury. Or there was speculation. But for this proceeding, for some reason, it surprised someone.

All the mainstream media, purported to say, well, Jack Smith was just consulting inside the Justice Department.

I think that that was essentially running a cover story for the fact that they were conveniently not -- purporting not to watch the courthouse.

Because they would have seen the prosecutors, regularly going to the grand jury to get this new indictment. And yet there was entire radio silence on that, until the surprise of yesterday.

GLENN: So what is supposedly new in this one, that changes the ground?

JEFF: It's not. It's essentially just a reformulation, right?

So the original indictment started out by saying, you know, Donald Trump, president of United States. You know, from -- from these dates, to candidate Trump.

So everything has been reframed. In the light of trying to fit it into the third box of being a private unofficial act.

GLENN: Person.

JEFF: Yeah. And otherwise, it's the same. It's the same four counts. There are -- even, you know, particularly remarkable to me, Glenn. Is not just that they have the -- trying to repackage the allegations, right? To go against Trump in his private capacity.

But the fact that two of the allegations were to this statute -- 28. I'm sorry. 18USC1512.

And that statute went to the Supreme Court, also this past term, involving the January 6ers. And the Supreme Court decided that -- that 1512C2, about obstruction with official proceeding, which I'm sure you and many of our your listeners would have heard of. You know, a statute, that really, they stretched to try to apply to January 6th. Even though they didn't. The Supreme Court held, that it did not apply to the January 6ers. And it remanded.

So, you know, Jack Smith has never said aye. He's still using 1512. Many commentators thought that after the Supreme Court's Fischer decision, that's the one about 1512C2, that he would drop the 1512 counts. And he would just go with the conspiracy counts.

Two conspiracy counts. There's 118USC371, conspiracy to defraud the US.

And then the second conspiracy count is a conspiracy against civil rights. But, no. He's using exactly the same four counts that he used before.

That's why I say, you know, the new indictment is really the same as the old indictment.

GLENN: I have to tell you, I don't think the Rosenbergs went through this kind of trial and tribulation. That Donald Trump. I've never seen anybody treated like they treat Donald Trump.

Never. What -- what the courts have done to him, what the prosecutors have done to him, in these cherry-picked courthouses and districts is absolutely obscene.

And I -- I would love to them your point of view, Jeff. I think they will put him in jail in September.

JEFF: Well, I'm actually, Glenn, making preparations to go up there, to be in Judge Merchan's court in Manhattan, on September 18th if the sentencing goes forward.

Look, two days before that time, on September 16th, Judge Merchan is supposed to issue his decision about whether the Supreme Court's immunity decision, Trump v. the US, that I've been talking about.

Whether that essentially requires a new trial to be granted. And I don't see how it couldn't possibly -- you know, you could come to any other conclusion, to the fact that it requires a new trial. Because President Trump is immune for his official acts. And there's even, in addition to the three tiers of immunity that I've described to you.

The Supreme Court created a new exclusionary rule, and said that, in terms of liberation inside the executive branch, are -- are protected. And they cannot be presented in court, as evidence against the president. And so the Alvin Bragg prosecution, it presented precisely such prohibited evidence. It had Hope Hicks in the Oval Office, talking to the president. And testifying about various things.

The jury heard that. And you can't unring that bell. They produced a verdict, based on hearing that evidence.

Alvin Bragg is trying to argue. Oh, it's all harmless error. Right?

We would have gotten that, even if we hadn't presented that evidence. Well, who knows? No one knows that. And I don't believe it. And so he needs a new trial.

So I predict, sadly, you know, for the same reasons you say that the lawfare is just so intense and unprecedented against President Trump. And it really is a dagger at the heart of the republic, that I bet, you know, Judge Merchan is going to go ahead and deny the unite-based motion for a new trial. And then he will do the sentencing. And I actually would not be surprised if he sentenced President Trump, to prison.

And maybe he tries to, you know, soften it a little bit at the end. Just by saying, this sentence wouldn't begin to run until after the election, or something like that.

Or if you really wanted to go full bore, right? You can say, no, you're remanded into custody immediately. Or you're remanded into home confinement immediately. He has a lot of different options.

GLENN: Oh, my gosh. I have to tell you, I think the American people will lose their mind.

Both Republican and Democrat. And especially I think independents. I think there are a lot of people who are sick of this. And they will see, this is a banana republic.

JEFF: I agree. It's already gotten to a banana republic level in terms of the level of lawfare directed at President Trump, at myself.

GLENN: Right.

JEFF: You know, at Steve Bannon, and Peter Navarro. You know, all of my folks down in Georgia, with Fani Willis.

GLENN: It's crazy.

JEFF: Now they have a new case out in Arizona, which they're trying to press on. You know, it's relentless.

It really is something that is trying to criminalize politics. And criminalize the ordinary operations of laughter. And pretend that Donald Trump was the chief executive of the United States.

That he -- you know, some unprecedented threat, that requires a level of treatment, that no one has ever gotten before, in the history of our country.

Just take, Glenn, the Mar-a-Lago raid. Right?

What did they do with Vice President Pence and President Biden? They negotiated an agreement to go and search through their -- their homes, right? But did President Trump get that treatment?

No. He got a jackbooted raid. With armed agents. That wouldn't even show the president's lawyer, Christina Bobb at the time, the warrant initially, until she basically had to pry it out of him.

GLENN: Would you hold on just a second, Jeff?

Because I have to take a 60-second break. And then when we come back, I would just like to know, what happens if he go to jail? Can he be president of the United States?

How would that work? Does Secret Service go with him?

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(music)
From the Center for Renewing America, he's the senior fellow there. Also, former US DOJ Assistant Attorney General Jeff Clark is with us.

So if they put him in jail, can a president be in jail?

If he -- let's say he wins the election. But he's in jail. What happens?

JEFF: So there are two periods, right? One would be a period, prior to inauguration. There to answer your question, right before the break.

You know, the Secret Service would still protect him.

And, you know, indeed, Alvin Bragg had been talking to the New York jail system, about trying to make accommodations for that.

And then in the period after he's inaugurated, then I think all of the -- any kind of imprisonment would have to be ended for suspended.

It would be what lawyers call preempted by the Constitution since he would be the dully elected and inaugurated president of the United States.

He can't be kept from exercising those functions by a state conviction.

GLENN: That is absolutely unbelievable.

I mean, I don't think our Founders ever -- they -- I don't think they ever saw something like this happening.

I mean, you know, our -- our checks and balances are so far out of whack. And the administrative state is so strong now.

That, you know, almost anything can happen. It is really crazy. Jeff, thank you. Go ahead.

JEFF: Thank you. Yeah. I was going to say, you're absolutely right. The republic is hanging by a thread at this point. Hopefully Judge Merchan will come to his senses. And I think the Supreme Court is always in the background to make this all come out right, like they did in the Trump immunity case on July 1st.

GLENN: Hmm. Jeff Clark, thank you very much. I appreciate it.

You can follow him on Twitter, @JeffClarkUS. @JeffClarkUS. Thanks, Jeff. Appreciate it.

I mean, can you imagine, Stu?

STU: Yeah. I was thinking about that, as you were playing out the situations.

What if -- you putting them in jail, would send a message.

I think, as you pointed out. I think would backfire on them.

Could you see them do House arrest?

So he can't campaign anywhere.

He can't do any rallies. They put an ankle bracelet on him. I don't know. That one, I could see.

Especially if they're losing. I think the more -- the more dire they feel their situation is. The more likely that happens. That he goes to prison.

Because, you know, they will see this as, well, I mean, we've got this other card to play. Why not give it a shot?

We're losing. Right now, I don't think they feel like they're in that situation. I feel like they think they're winning, and why would they shake it up?

GLENN: I have to tell you though, I think if Donald Trump was under House arrest and he couldn't leave his house, first of all, he could do video from his house. I'm sure.

And there would be people like me. You know, I would be willing to take a hiatus and go campaign for the man, if he couldn't campaign himself. And not -- and not because, well, he's a Republican or anything.

Because --

STU: It's wrong.

GLENN: -- this is an American that has been wronged. And we all have to stand up for it.

I mean, they are out of control.

STU: That's going to be fascinating to see.

GLENN: Can you imagine if they win?

Oh, my gosh. Can you imagine how much trouble we're in if they win, Stu.

I mean, everything we've ever talked about, is happening right now.
(music)
As Jeff just said, a republic hangs by a thread. Who is going to rush in and save it?

Well, I will tell you, it will only be good and godly people.

Because it's got to be people of merit, that are trying to find favor in the eyes of God.

And say, we will be a fruitful nation. And we will bear good fruit, otherwise, he will curse us and we will whither on the vine. Quickly.

The Dark Truth Behind Queer Theory & Gender ‘Affirmation’ For Children | Liz Wheeler & Glenn Beck

In this explosive conversation, Glenn Beck and Liz Wheeler expose the disturbing roots of gender ideology and queer theory — and how these radical ideas are directly targeting children. From the shocking origins of queer theory, where pedophilia and child pornography were openly defended, to Planned Parenthood’s new role as one of the largest distributors of transgender hormone therapy, the truth is undeniable: this movement is not about freedom or equality, but about dismantling families, corrupting innocence, and profiting off of our children’s pain. What we are witnessing is nothing less than a satanic ideology dressed up as compassion — and it’s spreading like wildfire through schools, culture, and medicine. Parents, you need to hear this. The time to protect your children and fight back is NOW.

Watch the full episode HERE

Here’s how INTENSE JFK’s Presidential Fitness Test was

President Trump recently signed an executive order to reinstate the Presidential Fitness Test and the media is in a frenzy. But Glenn and Stu look back at the history of these tests, including JFK’s version of the Test that seems IMPOSSIBLE for modern Americans. But Glenn has a secret reason for why he’s confident in his pull-up abilities…

Transcript

Below is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: What is the -- what is the new physical -- the president's physical fitness, you know, plan?

STU: Well, the thing that RFK Jr and Hegseth were rolling out the other day. I don't know if it was the full test or anything, but they were issuing a challenge to America, to be able to do 100 pushups and 50 pullups within five minutes.

GLENN: That's crazy.

STU: Thank you! That struck you as also crazy.

I don't think there's ever been a time in my life, that I could do that. Let alone now with shoulder problems. And much too much weight.

GLENN: All right. But that was before I needed this walker.

STU: I don't think there was a time in my 20s or my teens, that I could do that. But that -- in five minutes? Fifty pullups?
GLENN: Both of them in 5 minutes.
STU: Yeah, both of them. So it's not like 100 pushups in five minutes. It's both tasks within five minutes.

GLENN: No. No. That's not true.

STU: RFK Jr. is just doing it in jeans.

GLENN: Yeah, well, RFK, he's -- he's a weirdo. I mean, he is. Come on. When it comes to fitness, he's a weirdo.
STU: Yes.
GLENN: I mean, he's done this his whole life. He's like 800 years old. He can still do it.

STU: Yes. Depressive, I will say.

GLENN: I don't know. He's a sex machine.

STU: Oh. That's been a problem for him. Yes, that's been an issue in his life. Yes.

GLENN: Okay. All right. Go ahead.

STU: Separate from the president's physical fitness test.

GLENN: Right.

STU: But, I mean, they don't, they don't really think we're going to do that, right?
Like, I mean, how long would that take you to do?

STU: I think for me, it would take a good month. I think a month, I could probably get two pullups a day. That would get me around, a little over 50. So I could do that. Plus, the pushups. A solid month, I could get that done.

GLENN: You could do more than two a day. You could do more than two a day.

STU: You know, Glenn, I've got to say. I think -- I will throw a number out there. No science behind this, so just as a guestimate.

I would say 40 percent of the population can't do any pullups. Maybe 30 percent. Thirty percent of the population can do exactly zero pullups. Precisely zero, so an infinite amount of time would be a correct answer for a third of the population.

GLENN: I think you're -- I think you're being -- I think you're being a little too optimistic. I think it's closer to 40 or 50. I think it's closer to 40 or 50. Maybe 60 percent.

STU: Right! Pushups are one thing. I mean, I think almost anyone can do a pushup. One --

GLENN: You can do a pushup. Yes. Yes.

STU: Singular pushup. And if you can do one, you can wait long enough, to do a second one.
And at some point, the hundred gets done. That's not the case with pullups. Pullups, you can sit there and think about how much you want to do a pullup for a really long time. But that doesn't make a pullup happen. If you've got a certain amount of weight on you. You're not doing a pullup. It's not occurring.

GLENN: I have no idea, how many pullups I can do.

STU: I have an exact number of pullups, you can do.

GLENN: Do you? You think so?

STU: Yeah. Yeah. I have the exact number. I have to calculate -- AI has been running a report on me. It came up with zero.

GLENN: Right. Right. Really?
I can do. I mean, this is so pathetic. Listen to this. I bet I could do three. You know, you could do three.

STU: In a row? Proper form.

GLENN: What do you mean in a row?

STU: I mean, holding on to the bar, without letting go, you're doing three. There's no way. I don't think so.

GLENN: I think I could do. Well, with proper form, I don't know about that. I don't know about that.

STU: I'm not saying it has to look pretty. You have to get your chin up above the bar. It can't be one of those things, where you're a quarter of the way up there.

GLENN: So I can do one and rest for ten minutes. I could do another one.

I think I can do that.

STU: If you -- I'm not saying, you jump up, and you pull yourself up as you're pulling up. Full hang --

GLENN: See, you may not know this.

But you know what, I've done the DNA test. Have you ever done the DNA test that tells you all about your genes and everything else? Mine came back with something remarkable, and I have to share. You might feel bad, next.
(laughter)

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STU: Coming up next, Glenn attempts live pullups on the air. Stay tuned!
(OUT AT 8:29 AM)

GLENN: You know no idea what who you're dealing with. No. You don't have any idea who you're dealing with here.

I got my DNA test back like 10 years ago. And we all -- we all took it, because we were looking for things. And so we all took it. My DNA test came back, and everybody in the family, their test made total sense. Like, oh, yeah. That makes...

Then we read mine. We have to find -- I have to find. See if Tania has it still. We should have had it framed. I swear to you, they -- they mixed me up with somebody else.

Somebody else is like, wait a minute. I'm this pathetic? Mine came out and said, you have the muscular structure of a -- of a -- something like a -- an elite athlete. You have the abilities and agility and everything else of an elite athlete. And I'm like, there's not a chance. I don't have any of that!

I don't even know if I have muscles. I have to check once in a while, and go, do I have muscles still?

Doctor is like, I don't know. Can I? Ask just press against my hand on the leg. I don't know.

You know, I don't know how to do that exactly. So --

STU: You sure it said elite athlete and not elephant? I mean, if they misspelled it.

GLENN: It was.

I was having eye problems at the time.

STU: No!

GLENN: I mean, we read it. And I was like Tania, I believe that for Tania.

Maybe they switched me and Tania. Because Tania is really strong. She'll kick your butt.

She works out every day. All of that. Me? Never. Never.

And it kind of makes me wonder, when I get to the other side, and the Lord went, okay.

So what did you do with your life again?

Because I gave this incredible body, and you wasted it the whole time.

And I'm like, you should have been more clear, okay?

You should have been more clear. I -- maybe I could have played basketball. But I tried once. And it was embarrassing. It was embarrassing. It was like sixth grade. And I'll never live -- I don't even want to think about my time on a basketball court. Okay? So don't -- don't start with me. You should have made it a little clearer. When I first started to do stuff. And I think that's fair. I think that's a fair argument. In my defense. In my defense, Your Honor, God, you should have made it a little more clear.

STU: Yeah. I mean, if they really wanted us to do this, then the 11th Commandment is 50 pushups, and -- or, 50 pullups and 100 pushups, right?

Like, put it in a commandment if you really want us to do it. You have to be more specific, we're Americans.

GLENN: Okay. So let me give you the top of the list for the JFK Presidential Fitness Test. Okay? This is what you had to do in high school. In high school.

Thirty-four pullups. Bar dips: Fifty-two. What's -- because I believe I did that. A long time. And I don't recommend it.

STU: It's not a barhop.

GLENN: Oh, it's -- oh, bar dips. Okay. Okay. All right.

Bar dips: 52. Handstand pushups: Fifty. What are handstands?

STU: Oh, my God. Handstands.

GLENN: I can't even stand on my hands. Is that I'm doing a handstand and a push up? Because that's not happening. You're not human.

STU: Yeah. You're balancing yourself on your hands. Your feet are above your hands on the wall. Like a wall. And you're doing --

GLENN: Oh, so you're balancing yourself. That makes it a little easier. Still impossible.

But a little easier.

GLENN: Impossible. You could do precisely zero of those.

Aright. So you had to do 50 handstand pushups.

Or one arm -- 30 -- no, sir.

Twenty-six one-arm burpees in 30 seconds. Is that a one-armed push up?

STU: No. Well, you're bracing your yourself like you're about to begin a pushup in a burpee with only one arm, which that's not that difficult.

But then you're doing. Then you're like, you move your feet towards your hands. And then you jump up in the air basically. And then you do it repeatedly.

GLENN: No, no, no. That's ridiculous. No.

STU: There's a law of gravity. You're not supposed to violate it. If it was a recommendation of gravity, then maybe jumping would be appropriate. But it's not. Follow the law.

GLENN: In 48 seconds, you had to do a 3300-yard shuttle. Now, I've been to the airport. I think I've done a 3300-yard shuttle, but it depends on who is driving. You know.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: Rope climb. Try this. Rope climb. Twenty feet, hands only! Sit start.

STU: That's what I remember from the president's physical fitness test. And I remember looking at that rope, like, no chance I could get up that thing.

GLENN: I remember looking up at that thing. Humiliation. Humiliation is coming my way. I'll never kiss a girl, because that ain't happening. I'll get maybe 10 feet up. Maybe. Maybe.

STU: And you were right for 24 years from that time, approximately.

GLENN: Agility run, 17 seconds. Extension pressups, what? What?

I'm sorry. Why am I so tired reading this?

Extension pressups. What's an extension pressup, 8-inch? You had to do 100 of them.

STU: Let's see. Exercise. An exercise for low-back pain involving lying on your stomach and pressing your upper body up with your arms while keeping your hips relaxed and down on the mat.

GLENN: Oh, I could do that know. 8 inches.

STU: The last part of it, relaxing down on the mat.
GLENN: That's what my doctor says I should be doing. What?

STU: I can do relaxed and down on the mat. That part of it --

GLENN: Yeah. I could do that -- I'm the only guy. I took yoga for a while, like three weeks. My wife is like, yoga. You could do yoga. Let's just do yoga together.

I did. And the yoga instructor said to me. Because we were doing a plank.

STU: Yeah.

GLENN: And she came and all I remember her waking me up. And saying, I think you're the only person I've ever -- ever taught that fell asleep in yoga. And I'm like, it's just so relaxing. Just let me sleep. Let me sleep.

STU: That's interesting, that you did yoga. Is there any footage of that? Any video that we could post? That would be good for --

GLENN: No. There's not. You had to do pegboard. Five trips of pegboard. And I think that's when you have the two pegs.

STU: Yes, it was a board.

GLENN: You have to take it out, and put it up, right?

STU: This is American Ninja Warrior. No way.

GLENN: There's no way. There's no way.

STU: This is amazing.

GLENN: Try this one: You had to do a 45-second handstand. I've never been able to do a handstand. Never!

STU: Never.

GLENN: And I'm an elite athlete. I'm an elite athlete. Try this one: A man carry, 5 miles.

STU: What? What do you mean a --

GLENN: Five-mile man carry.

STU: Is a man carry as obvious as it --

GLENN: I think it is.

STU: You're carrying --

GLENN: If I'm going to carry that man, you have to carry me that man for five miles.

I'm not sure, I can't carry any man for any miles. I mean, if I am -- if I am a firefighter, count on burning in the house. You're going to burn in the house. Because I can't carry you out. I can get in there and go, yeah, I will have to leave you.
I will have to leave you here. I can't help you, sorry.

It's also getting really hot in here. I have to go. You had to do a five-mile jog. An obstacle course.

You had to swim prone for a mile. You had to swim underwater for 50 yards, any strokes, two minutes. Deep waterfront, hang float, with arms. What? What is a deep water hang float with arms. Wait. Wait.

It's a deep waterfront hang float with arms and ankles tied for six minutes.

What kind of al-Qaeda PE class was this?

STU: Who has access to -- who has access -- like, you're in the middle of the country, you may not have a deep water body nearby. This is -- are you sure this is an actual test?

GLENN: This is the actual test. This is the actual -- what is a deep water front hang float with arms and ankles tied for six minutes? Can you look that up?

STU: A deep water hang float is an aquatic hang float done in the deep end of a pool with the aid of flotation device, such as a noodle or belt.

In this position, the flotation twice supports your upper body, while your legs and torso hang freely beneath you.

That can't be what it is.

GLENN: You can do that.

Deep-end of the pool.

STU: Can you bring a margarita?

GLENN: Man, this test is no big deal.

What! No way. No way!

Here's the last thing on the test.

A vertical tread in an 8-foot circle for two hours!

No way.

STU: Vertical tread in an 8-foot circle?

GLENN: So you're in the water and you're treading water in a circle for two hours. Two!

STU: This is not -- what?

This is not the test.

GLENN: It is. Now, I told you, this is the top of the test.

This is the top of the test.

So this is for the ones who could do all the other tests.

This was the top of the test. The bottom of the test is not that much better. Here's the entry, okay? Let's see. Pullups, 2/6/10. I don't know what that means. Pushups, 16, 24, 32. Bar dips, four, eight, and 12. Situps, 30, 45, and 60. Broad jump, 6-foot, 6, 6, 6. And 6, 9.

To jump 6 feet? I don't even know if --

STU: That one is possible, yes. Glenn, I know it sounds incredible. But, yes. That one is possible.

GLENN: Sounds incredible. You know, I think we should have the average person Olympics. I really do. I really do.

STU: Oh, I would watch that.

GLENN: I would watch that every time.

You see them coming. And you're like, hmm. That one -- three feet. I'm giving him 3 feet. 200-yard shuttle. Agility run. Rope climb, 18 feet, hands only. 880 yards in three minutes. A mile in seven minutes. Pegboard, six holes. A 50-yard swim. Forty -- 40, 50-yard swim in 36 seconds. Man carry, 880 yards. No, thank you! No, thank you!

Look at -- look at what we've gone down. That's the bottom of it. And I don't think most Americans could do that.

I couldn't. Well, I could. Because I'm an elite -- I have the body of an elite athlete.

STU: No. You could not. Now, of course -- let's just say, this is supposed to be for a high school kid. Right?

So this is the prime of your athletic life. Could you do some of these things? Probably.
GLENN: Go into high school.
Go into any high school, and ask them to do this. There's no way. And all of the kids would be.

STU: Well, that's kind of what the reaction would be.

GLENN: Don't get me wrong. I would have been there too. And my parents would have said, suck it up. Just do it.

So nothing has really changed.

STU: That's been the reaction to this proposal too, of bringing this back. Right? The media is covering this. Like, it's going to embarrass children.

You know, I mean, I do remember it being like, I can't do that. I'm not going to the top of that rope. That's not happening.

That's sort of life. Right? Sometimes you can do things. Sometimes you can't do other things.

GLENN: That's why you have to learn how to injure yourself.

You know, how many stairs can I throw myself down, to not do serious damage, but enough to get me out of PE.

STU: Yeah, you have to fake an why are. You have to learn from LeBron James. Act like you got hit in the eye. And fall down like you were just stabbed over and over again, like you were in an athletic competition.

GLENN: There's no way. There's no way.

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